by Kit Tunstall
I took her hand, jerking it against my own, and compared our palms sizes. Our fingers were about the same length too. “Look at that, Shane. She has the same size hands as me. She did this to herself. I don’t know how, but she did it.”
He scoffed. “She’d have to be a gymnast to be able to contort herself enough to strangle herself from behind.” His lack of faith in me stung, but not as much as the next words he uttered. “For safety’s sake, until we sort this out, you should go wait in one of the offices and quarantine yourself voluntarily, Alyssa.”
The Alyssa hurt almost as much as his words, since he usually called me Lyss. I stumbled back, shocked by what I was hearing. I darted a glance to Jamar, and he seemed to be regretful, but he nodded his agreement. “Just until we settle this and sort everything out. We need everyone to be safe on the base, Alyssa.”
Alyssa again. I shook my head, backing away without thought until I ran into Wesley. I looked up at him with all the pain I was feeling reflected in my eyes. He gave me a sympathetic expression, and I remembered he was on my side. “We’re not locking her up in here. If you feel that way about it, I’ll take her somewhere else off-base and keep her safe.”
I was so hurt and angry that it sounded like a good idea to me. I nodded. “Would you please? I can’t stay here right now.” I was wounded and betrayed, and I’d never hurt so much in my life. Even losing my family and Becky hadn’t hurt this deeply. Then, I’d felt cheated at losing them, but they hadn’t done anything to actively cause the separation. They hadn’t died willingly just to leave me alone, but Shane and Jamar had both taken Kassandra’s side, which meant they hadn’t taken mine.
The evidence that suggested I had done it was circumstantial. If it had been either one of them in the same position, I would’ve supported them without question, because I knew them well enough to know they wouldn’t have hurt someone with deliberate intent, no matter the circumstances. They didn’t have the same faith in me, and it shook me.
I heard Jamar and Shane protesting the idea, but I tuned them out as I clung to Wesley, allowing him to lead me from the mess hall. We didn’t even stop for clothes or supplies. We just went to one of the Humvees we’d found here on the base. I settled into the front seat, allowing him to get behind the wheel, and stared unseeing out the window as we took the platform up and drove away from the base a few minutes later.
I was lost in my own grief and misery for several long minutes before I realized Han wouldn’t know what had happened. He wouldn’t have supported Shane and Jamar in their suggestion that maybe I should be locked away for Kassandra’s safety, and he definitely would never approve of me leaving the base. I’d probably been a fucking idiot to go off halfcocked, but at least Wesley was there, so I wasn’t alone. I needed to cool down, and then we could go back and face them.
“I didn’t do it,” I said firmly.
Wesley reached over and put his hand on my leg, squeezing gently. “I believe you, Lyss. You wouldn’t do anything like that, no matter how much you disliked her.”
I put my hand over his, touched by the gesture of comfort, but not liking the feel of his hand on me. I wasn’t certain if I was going to squeeze his hand in return, or gently pry it off my leg. Either way, as my fingers molded over his, I froze. Our hands were nearly the same size.
PART SEVEN: HOT, HOT, HOT
Chapter One
I abandoned all plans to remove his hand from my leg, not wanting to rouse his suspicion. I laid mine higher in my lap and struggled not to show my sudden anxiety. He had to have been the one who’d attacked Kassandra, and she must have been in on it. All the time they’d spent together recently hadn’t been because they were forming a relationship, but because they were plotting this…whatever it was. I understood her motivation for wanting to get rid of me, but I didn’t understand Wesley’s role in all of this.
Trying to appear oblivious, I adopted a regretful tone. “I’ve been a big idiot. We never should have left the base, because now they’re going to be sure I’m guilty. And Han doesn’t know what’s going on. We need to go back and face this thing.”
He kept driving, his gaze straight ahead, though his hand tightened perceptibly on my thigh, almost enough to hurt. “We can’t do that.”
I frowned. “Why not?”
“They don’t deserve you if they’d treat you like that. You go crawling back, and it makes you weak.”
I caught my breath, wondering if he’d picked up on my need to be strong. Had he always had keen observational skills, or had Kassandra taught him some of her manipulative tricks? I tried a different approach. “Thank you for standing with me. It must have been difficult to go against Kassandra when you two are involved.”
He snorted. “We aren’t involved.”
“I saw you in the hallway a few days ago, all wrapped up in each other.”
He shrugged. “There was a reason for that, but it wasn’t because we’re involved.”
I was getting frustrated and also edging toward frightened. I probably should have been afraid before now, but I was mostly just confused by Wesley’s actions. “We do have to go back to the base. It isn’t safe for just you and me out here.”
He stiffened, and his hand tightened again on my thigh, definitely hurting now. “I can protect you just as well as they can. I’m just as good as they are.”
I nodded. “I know, but it’s just too hard for two people to have each other’s backs out here. I think we need more people in our group, even if that includes Kassandra.” The moment I got back to base, I was dragging that bitch off by her hair, regardless of what anyone else said, but I had to get there first. I’d say or do anything to get back. Maybe I was adopting a few moves from her playbook as well.
“We aren’t going back.”
I glared at him as I crossed my arms over my chest. “I get a say in that, you know.”
He turned his head to look at me, squeezing his hand as hard as he could on my thigh until I yelped. “I’ve gone through all this to get you, and I’m not returning you to them. Kassandra has Shane now, and I have you.”
My fear definitely flared then. “Why do you want me? You and Kassandra were making out. I don’t understand any of this.”
He sneered at me. “We staged that so you’d think you had nothing more to worry about. Kassandra’s been planning all along to take you out. You should be glad she went to me for help, because her original plan was to kill you.”
I scoffed. “That piece of work couldn’t kill me.”
He glanced away from the road again briefly to shoot me an admonishing look. “Do you really think she was going to play fair and approach you from the front? She’d sneak around behind your back and kill you that way. Poisoning your food, a knife in the back, pushing you down the stairs… She had all sorts of ideas in mind.”
I was chilled by his words. I’d known she was a manipulative bitch, but I hadn’t realized she was homicidal. “Thanks for saving me,” I said in a dry tone. I don’t think he detected my sarcasm, which was probably a good thing.
“You’re welcome. I didn’t want you hurt.”
I licked my lips, trying to be reasonable as I put my hand over his in an attempt to get him to lighten his touch. It was really starting to hurt, though I refused to cry out again. “You could have just told me what she was planning instead of doing all this.”
“I could have, but then I wouldn’t get what I wanted out of the deal.”
My stomach dropped. “What is it you want?” But I already knew the answer.
“You.”
I nearly choked on a ragged gasp. “But why do you want me?”
“Everyone else had a turn, so I should get one too.”
I glared at him. “I’m not an amusement park ride, and I don’t sleep with just anyone. I care about Jamar, Shane, and Han.”
He turned angry eyes on me when he should have been watching the road. “But you don’t care about me?” He asked the question so vehemently that spittle flew
from his mouth.
“Of course I care about you. We’re friends. I’m not attracted to you in that way, but I thought we were friends. Sorry that’s not enough for you, but it’s all I can offer.”
“I could have lived with that when you weren’t screwing Han too, but then it was all of them. All but me.” His eyes returned to the road, much to my relief, though he was still cold and angry. “You can’t say no. You act like you have a choice in the matter, but the world’s different now. I’ve had to listen for weeks to the sound of you fucking everyone but me, and I’ve had enough of that. You’re mine now, and unlike the rest of those losers, I don’t share.”
Anger was warring with fear, trying to gain dominance, and I was happy to let it. Anger might be more productive. “I’d never sleep with you. You’d have to force me. Do you want to be a rapist? Has the world changed so much that you’re okay with forcing a woman to have sex with you?”
He shrugged as though it didn’t bother him at all. “Everything’s different now.”
Staring at him, evaluating his body language and expression, I knew he was telling me the truth. He didn’t care if he had to force me to keep me. I’d never realized before that he had the same sociopathic tendencies as Kassandra. He’d always seemed like such a nice guy, quiet and on the shy side. Other than that brief period of time when he’d made me feel uncomfortable with all his leering, which I had attributed to simple post-apocalyptic sexual frustration, he’d always been friendly and helpful. I’d honestly thought we were friends and had never seen him as a threat.
Sweat beaded on my forehead, and a chill went down my back. I was faintly nauseated, and I had to act soon, doing something he wouldn’t expect. Now that I knew his intentions, he wouldn’t be maintaining any façade.
I was almost as startled as him when I surged forward and wrenched on the steering will, sending us careening off the road. He pulled back, but I held on with all my strength. It wasn’t exactly a match for his, but it was enough to keep him from getting back on the road.
I had expected him to slam on the brakes, which might give me a chance to get out of the Humvee and run away before he could stop me. I hadn’t anticipated him being completely off his rocker, because the more I fought, the harder he pressed on the accelerator. I saw the tree coming toward us, and I tried to pull the steering wheel to the right in an attempt to avoid it.
With a mad laugh, he pulled it back in his direction with a wrench hard enough to pull on my shoulder and make me cry out. He could have moved around the tree if he had eased down on the accelerator, but instead, he just pressed harder, surely hitting the floorboard by now.
“You’re going to kill us both,” I screamed.
“So be it.”
I let go of the steering wheel, no longer trying to fight as I fumbled for my seatbelt. Like an idiot, I hadn’t put it on before leaving the compound. I’d been too numb and immersed in my hurt feelings to have any situational awareness. It clicked about a millisecond before he hit the tree, and the entire vehicle jolted at the collision.
I was thrown forward, and the seatbelt tightened around me, stealing my breath. As I started to rebound, the angle was off, sending my head smashing into the window instead of back against my seat. I didn’t even have a chance to fight the wave of blackness overtaking me. I was awake one moment and completely out the next.
I came to, feeling fuzzyheaded and queasy. I blinked open my eyes, which was a difficult endeavor under the circumstances. They each seemed to be anchored with hundred-pound weights. Finally, my lids opened, and I was able to vaguely focus. I was experiencing a bit of double vision, which made everything blurry around the edges, but didn’t create an entire duplicate image.
A shiver went through me when I realized I was naked from the waist down. I let out a small whimper and tried to move, but was still incapacitated. I tried to focus on my surroundings, finally ascertaining he had moved me in the passenger seat, laying me across sideways. My head rested on the hard central console, and my hair was tangled with the gear shifter. He’d removed my pants, but I didn’t hurt inside, so I didn’t think he’d violated me yet.
Wesley stood above me, holding my calves and pushing my knees back toward my stomach as he splayed my thighs. If I had Miranda, I would have shot him without hesitation.
Unfortunately, as I fumbled at my side for my gun or even my knife, I discovered the asshole had stripped them from me. He must have taken my holster when he took my pants, and I cursed his ability to think straight. If he’d been so consumed with lust to have me, I’d hoped maybe he’d overlooked that, but no such luck. “Please don’t do this,” I rasped.
“Don’t worry. You’ll like it.” As he spoke those words, he lowered his head, moving between my thighs.
I shuddered with disgust when his tongue entered me. “Please stop. Just fuck me, but don’t do this.” It was enough to put me off oral sex for life, and I’d hate to feel like that.
He ignored my words as he continued licking me. I tried to squirm away, but wasn’t able to in my weakened state. I just didn’t have enough strength—at least in my upper body, but I wondered about my legs. All the running and leg presses I’d done surely must have given me strong leg muscles.
I waited until he was clearly into his task, somehow enduring his disgusting touch until he was breathing rapidly. When I was certain he wasn’t paying attention to anything except his tongue in my pussy, struggling to coax a response he was never going to get, I locked my thighs around his head. At first, he must have thought I was coming, because he increased the rapidity of his tongue, but as I squeezed my thighs tighter, trapping him against my pussy, he started to struggle.
I clenched my legs for all I was worth, keeping him tight against me so he couldn’t breathe. He was flailing and doing his best to pry me off now, but desperation fueled my strength. He’d either been so arrogant or eager that he hadn’t bothered to tie me up before he started abusing me, but if he broke free, I knew he wouldn’t make that mistake again. He’d either shoot me and be done with it, or he’d restrain me so I couldn’t fight him at all. Of those two options, I preferred the first, but I wasn’t certain he’d give me that luxury. He’d gone to a lot of trouble to obtain me.
He reared back, his hands on my thighs holding me close to him even as he tried to get away. His movements dragged me out of the Humvee, and I banged my head on the floorboard on the way out in the same spot I’d hit before. The pain flared, and I started to gray out. I couldn’t let that happen, so I focused on what he would do to me if I went unconscious. I had no doubt he’d rape me whether I was awake or not, and the idea of sharing my body with him was enough to make me vomit. It flew from my mouth, and I barely managed to turn my head to keep from plastering myself.
He kept trying to fight his way out of the tight grasp I had, until his back collided with a tree. It seemed to give him an idea, and I grunted in surprise when he suddenly held me harder, not allowing me to escape him if I’d wanted to. I realized his intent was to ram me against another tree, and I somehow managed to fold myself upward so that my back took the brunt of the collision, because if he’d slammed my face against the tree, I probably would have died.
The pain was excruciating, and I ended up loosening my hold on his face, though I didn’t want to. In an instant, my legs slipped away, and he was turning me so he could hold my front against his. I was certain his intent was to take me right then, and he thought I was still incapacitated with pain.
He didn’t expect me to be able to fight back. Hell, I barely expected it myself, but I forced my arms to lift, and I grabbed both sides of his face. I dug my nails into his cheeks as I twisted his head. He hadn’t been expecting it, so he didn’t put up much of a fight as I broke his neck. There was a startled expression on his face before all awareness faded, and he slumped to the ground, taking me with him.
I hit the forest floor, screaming at the way any contact with my back hurt. It was spasming, and I could barely move.
His body was pinning me into the damp foliage, and I was feeling too weak to move him off me. I needed to get up and back in the Humvee, to seek shelter, because it was starting to rain.
For just a moment, I was tempted to close my eyes and sleep, to let the world fall away and not care if I drowned from rainfall or died from exposure. With the incredible amount of pain I felt, death would have been a welcome reprieve. Only knowing Han would never know what had happened to me, and Shane and Jamar would be at Kassandra’s mercy, gave me enough strength to roll him away from me. It took almost the last of my reserves, but I managed to crawl to the Humvee. Standing was impossible.
As I neared the passenger side, I found my holster discarded on the ground, along with my pants. I lifted them, and then stopped when I realized he’d cut them off me. I didn’t have any spare clothes, and I couldn’t bear the thought of trying to remove his pants so I could wear them. I didn’t think I had the strength anyway. I’d have to try to cover myself with the remnants of mine as best I could. Once the storm passed, I’d have to come up with a plan, but right now, I just wanted to huddle in the vehicle like a hurt animal in its den.
I dragged myself in there, my entire body shaking now from exertion and agony. I closed the door with the last of my strength and curled up on the seat as best I could. It was already cold, and without pants, it was bound to get colder. I only hoped it wasn’t going to snow, because even with the shelter of the Humvee, I’d probably die.
I peered over the dashboard, wincing when I saw how much of the hood was rammed into the tree and crumpled. I was certain the car wouldn’t start, but I had to try. With a whimper from the pain that shot through my back, I stretched for the keys hanging in the switch and tried to turn on the vehicle. Nothing happened, not even a clicking sound indicating a dead battery. The Humvee was totally wrecked. It would provide a measure of shelter, but I had no food or water, and I wasn’t certain how long it would take Han to find me.