‘Oh, my,’ Emily said.
‘Is childbirth not for you, lovely Emily?’ Rory asked, because Emily was the opposite of Louise and avoided that side of Theatre whenever possible.
‘Not even with drugs,’ Emily said. ‘God, listen to Anton!’
It sounded like a football match was taking place, with the woman screaming, Anton urging her on and even Louise was cheering. Then there was a long stretch of silence, followed by lusty screams.
‘Phew,’ Emily said. ‘I can uncross my legs now!’ But Hugh didn’t laugh at her joke, as he usually would have, and Emily remembered that they weren’t talking.
‘The next one up is very nervous,’ Hugh said to Rory. ‘I’ll come and have a word with her before she goes under.’
‘I ordered her a strong pre-op,’ Rory commented, ‘though I think it’s the mother who needs it.’
Emily chose not to grab a coffee and spend another uncomfortable ten minutes with Hugh. Instead she opted for a cola from the vending machine before setting up for the next patient—Jessica O’Farrell, an eighteen-year-old in for an exploratory laparoscopy.
‘Mum wants to come in while she goes under.’ Connor put his head through the doors and gave Rory a wry smile. ‘I’ve said no but she’s asked me to double-check!’
Rory shook his head. ‘I’ve already spoken to Jessica about this. Mum’s more stressed than her.’
Hugh was soon back from his quick coffee break and asked where the patient was as he was ahead of schedule and hoping to fit another patient onto the end of the list.
‘Connor is just bringing her in now,’ Emily answered, but as the trolley was wheeled in, for a second Emily froze.
She had been Jessica Albert when Emily had known her but of course her name might have changed all these years on.
‘Emily!’ Jessica’s tears halted and the surprise in her voice had Hugh look at Emily for her reaction, but she just stood there as Jessica’s tears actually stopped in mid-stream. ‘It is you.’
‘Jessica!’ Hugh watched as Emily pushed out a smile but though it was a wide one, Hugh could see the shock in Emily’s eyes and that her smile was guarded.
In all Emily’s years of nursing it had never happened. Well, once an uncle had had a hip replacement, but she’d been expecting to see him.
This, though, was completely unexpected and Jessica wasn’t even a relation.
She had once felt like one, though.
Today, had she been scrubbing in, as was her usual, Emily might not have even know that the patient was the Jessica she had known all those years ago. Thirteen years was a long time and with the different name and with her eyes closed, as they would have been in Theatre, Emily might not have even recognised her.
Emily pushed back the wave of emotion that threatened to knock her off course and walked over to the young woman. ‘How are you?’ Emily said, and then gave a little laugh. ‘Well, that’s a silly question, given that you’re about to have surgery.’
‘I’ve been dreading it,’ Jessica said. ‘I’m so scared of having an anaesthetic.’
‘A lot of people are.’ Emily squeezed her hand. ‘Rory’s on today and he’s amazing, he’ll take such good care of you. Have you met him?’
‘He came and saw me this morning.’ Jessica looked over at Rory and then back at Emily. ‘Will you be there?’
‘I’ll be with you while you’re put to sleep,’ Emily said, and then bit her bottom lip as Jessica looked at Hugh.
‘Emily and I were sisters...’
Hugh smiled back, though of course he didn’t really understand. He was pleased to see his patient looking a lot more relaxed but right now he was more concerned about the nurse because Emily’s face was chalk white and he watched as Jessica turned back to Emily. ‘I’ve looked you up a few times,’ Jessica admitted. ‘I was going to friend you on Facebook but I didn’t know if I’d be welcome...’
‘I’ve tried to look you up too,’ Emily said, ‘though no wonder I didn’t get very far, as that your surname’s changed.’
‘Mum married again and I took Mike’s surname.’
Emily hesitated. She didn’t really want to know how Katrina was doing and yet there was a small part of her that did. ‘How is your mum?’
‘She’s good,’ Emily said. ‘She’s happy. Well, I think she is.’
Does she ever mention me? Emily wanted to ask. And does she ever give me so much as a passing thought?
Tears were starting to sting at the back of Emily’s eyes and she quickly turned away and busied herself with the medicines she had already pulled up—she certainly didn’t want to add to Jessica’s difficult morning with her own gush of emotion.
Thankfully Hugh seemed to realise that Emily was struggling and he started chatting away to Jessica, telling her that it wouldn’t be a long procedure and he’d see her again when she woke up.
Hugh went to go. Rory had administered a stronger sedative, but the emotion in Jessica’s voice in the moment before she went under had Hugh pause at the door. ‘I missed you so much.’
Emily stared into her eyes and was honest in her response. ‘I missed you too.’
Oh, how she had.
They had been weekend and holiday sisters and losing Jessica and even Katrina had been a hurt that had gone unacknowledged by all. And there had been many more losses since then.
Emily held Jessica’s hand as she slid under and then helped wheel her through to the theatre and onto the operating table.
She glanced over to Hugh, who was scrubbing up, and he gave a small nod that said he’d take good care.
He always did.
Hugh worked on smaller procedures himself yet more and more he was honing his skills and was ready for that next step.
As he performed the procedure, an investigative laparoscopy for recurrent abdominal pain, Emily was the furthest thing from his mind.
He carefully checked the abdominal cavity and organs. Jessica had undergone many investigations and all had come back as normal.
As was this.
* * *
With the procedure over and Jessica being moved to Recovery, Hugh headed over there to check on Ernest.
‘He looks terrible...’ Hannah, his wife, was by the trolley, being comforted by their daughter, Laura.
‘He’s just had surgery, Mum, he was never going to be looking his best.’ Laura tried to reassure her mother but her eyes were anxious when they met Hugh’s. ‘I know you warned us about the tubes and things but Mum didn’t realise just how many there would be.’
‘I should never had made him go through with it,’ Hannah fretted. ‘He didn’t want the operation...’
‘He’s actually doing very well,’ Hugh said, checking through the observations. ‘I know it was a big decision but you both made it,’ Hugh said gently. ‘From what I’ve seen of your husband, he wouldn’t be talked into anything he didn’t want to do.’
He spent a few minutes reassuring Hannah but, glancing at Jessica, whose mother was being let in, his mind returned to Emily.
It was none of his business, Hugh told himself. Emily had made it very clear that she wanted no more than the relationship they had at work. Even so, he couldn’t help listening to the conversation that was taking place.
‘Emily’s here...’ They were the first words Jessica said as she struggled to sit up and take off her oxygen as a nurse gently kept her lying down.
‘Emily?’ Katrina said. Hugh wasn’t just idly listening, he was watching and not even attempting to hide that he was.
‘Emily,’ Jessica said again. ‘She’s a nurse here. Maybe you could see her, say hello...’
Katrina shook her head. ‘There’s no need for that. How are you?’
‘But Emily’s here!’ Groggy from anaesthetic, Jessica had no res
erves and started pulling her oxygen mask off. ‘Why wouldn’t you want to see her?’
‘Go back to sleep.’ Katrina smiled, replacing the mask. ‘You’re a bit confused from all the medicine.’
Nice get-out, Mum, Hugh thought, but then he got back to business and headed over to let Jessica’s mother know how the procedure had gone.
Yes, he should be cross with Emily, Hugh thought a little while later, or at the very least sulk and take his lunch elsewhere, but he could see her sitting, pretending to read a magazine, and Hugh knew she’d been crying.
‘How was your morning?’ Hugh asked, taking his usual seat.
‘Busy,’ Emily said. ‘You’ve got a big afternoon coming up,’ she added, because he and Alex were doing an aneurism repair, but Hugh shook his head.
‘Not any more. Rory wasn’t happy with his blood work, but maybe tonight...’ Hugh yawned and then looked at her swollen eyes. ‘You know, if I was a friend, instead of someone you tolerated because you’re paid to, you could talk to me about this morning.’
Emily didn’t want to talk about that morning but she was glad of the chance to address Friday night. ‘Hugh, I really am sorry about that. It came out all wrong. I just don’t want to mess up our friendship...’
‘You nearly did!’ Hugh said, his voice serious, and Emily nodded. ‘So what was this morning about? I know that it’s hard when a relative comes in.’
‘She’s not a relative, though,’ Emily said, with more than a dash of bitterness, and then decided it couldn’t hurt to explain. ‘When my parents’ marriage broke up my dad moved down here and moved in with Katrina, Jessica’s mum. I used to come down once a month, half the holidays...’
‘How old were you?’
‘Twelve,’ Emily said. ‘I didn’t like Katrina at first but I was always nice to her and my dad made sure to let me know she’d be my stepmum once the divorce was through and that this was my new family. I loved Jessica from the start, though. When I was there we shared a room. She was only little but we used to have such a laugh and then one weekend I came down to stay and found out that Katrina and my dad had split up.’
‘Did you not see them after that?’
‘Nope.’ Emily shook her head. ‘I asked where they were, but it didn’t matter apparently, and clearly I didn’t matter enough to Katrina to stay in touch...’ Emily closed her eyes as she recalled how easily people that she had been told to love, to treat as family, to care for had been removed from her life. ‘It was just the start of it. After Katrina, Dad met someone else and then someone else, then it was Donna and the twins...’ She gave a tight smile, as she recalled that Hugh knew about that. ‘You get the drift.’ She didn’t want to go on but Hugh persisted.
‘Your dad’s getting married again?’
Emily nodded.
‘Do you see the twins?’
‘Not really. I send them presents and things and they might be there at the wedding but Donna has majority access and...’ She shook her head. ‘I’m over talking about it.’ Emily looked around the staffroom that was emptying as everyone headed back. ‘I’d better go...’
It was very possibly her last shift—Emily didn’t know if she’d be coming back and if she did she wasn’t sure if her notice would be served out here or in Theatre.
It was very possibly the last time she would sit chatting to Hugh.
‘I really am sorry for what I said on Friday night...’
‘If you’d just told me the truth then it would have been fine.’
‘Yeah, well, don’t buy me champagne and then demand common sense.’
The opportunity to ask her out was there again.
He could ask her, they both knew it, except Hugh didn’t go for a second try. Instead he gave her a thin smile and Emily walked off.
What was it with Emily that had Hugh pondering calling her back and asking her out again?
In that moment he took a very honest inventory of himself and maybe Olivia had been right to be concerned. No, he’d never have cheated but there was something about his feelings for Emily that sat in a place marked unresolved.
There were many women he fancied and he had many women who were friends.
Sometimes the boundaries merged but never more so than they did with Emily. Hugh considered her a friend, though Emily had kept it pretty much at colleague level, yet there was no one he spoke more readily with, no one who got what he was saying even before the sentence had finished...
As for attraction.
Always.
Absolutely.
Yes.
He saw the tension in Emily’s shoulders as she headed out of the staffroom and, no, he wasn’t going to call her back and make an idiot of himself again.
* * *
Emily knew that too.
She’d left things on such a bad note that she’d probably lost her friend anyway if she quit working here, Emily realised. It was a terrible way to end three years of working together, but Hugh would be a very silly reason to stay.
Tears were starting again as she walked back to work but at the last minute she turned around, about to make her way back to the staffroom, but then she saw Alex walking in.
Yes, she did like Hugh in every way.
Maybe this way, maybe if they followed Hugh’s way, she could get the best of both worlds—time with the man who made her heart flutter, safe in the knowledge it would end soon. Maybe it would be easier to get a little bit more involved knowing from the start that they had a use-by date on the box.
She could handle that, surely?
As for sex?
There was an unfamiliar shiver in her stomach as she thought of it. No, it would be a terrible idea and yet...
Emily wasn’t completely closed to it either.
No.
If she was going to do this then sex had to stay off the agenda. She was doing this to cement her friendship with Hugh out of work.
A structured timeframe, company at her father’s wedding, a few Saturdays shared and then a very neat ending.
And it would be neat because, after today, she might not be back at the hospital.
Yes, it might be nice to have some time with Hugh and then a more natural break-up away from prying eyes, because she doubted she would be working here by then.
She could do that, Emily decided.
She would do that.
Emily walked into the staffroom, out of the corner of her eye she could see Alex at the urn, making a drink, and it would be very easy for Emily to think she had Hugh in the staffroom alone and so she took a deep breath and just made herself say it.
‘Hugh, did you manage to speak to Alex?’
She watched as Hugh frowned. ‘Speak to Alex about what?’
‘Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten! Hugh, you said that you would try—’
It was Alex who interrupted. ‘Talk to Alex about what?’ Alex said, and Emily jumped as if she hadn’t known that he was in the staffroom.
‘Oh, sorry.’ Emily pretended to fluster. ‘I didn’t know you were here.’
‘What did you want Hugh to ask me about?’ Alex persisted, and Emily didn’t have to fake being embarrassed as a blush started to spread over her cheeks as she spoke.
‘Hugh was going to ask if he could possibly take Friday off and join me for a part of my holiday. I’ve rented a cottage in Cornwall and I was hoping that Hugh might be able to come for a couple of days.’ She turned to Hugh, who was still frowning. ‘I’m sorry, Hugh, I know that you didn’t want anyone at work to know about us.’
‘Are you two...’ A huge grin was spreading over Alex’s face. So that was the reason for Emily’s swollen eyes that morning and Hugh’s dark mood, Alex reasoned. Yes, Alex had also heard the rumour through the grapevine about Gina and Hugh getting off with each
other over the weekend. ‘I didn’t realise!’
Neither had Hugh.
In fact, it took a moment for him to work out just what Emily was doing but when it dawned he cleared his throat before answering Alex. ‘We were going to try and keep things well away from work at least until Emily started in Accident and Emergency.’ Hugh looked at Emily, a wry smile turning the edges of his lips. Well, well, his green eyes said, and Emily returned a small smile.
‘That’s lovely news,’ Alex said. ‘And Cornwall is a beautiful part of the world—Jennifer and I have often spoken about buying a holiday house there. I don’t see any problem with taking Friday off—we’re not on take at the weekend. I’m sure I can manage one day without you. Enjoy yourselves!’
‘You’re sure?’ Hugh checked.
‘Absolutely!’ Alex nodded. ‘I can’t wait to see the photos.’
Hugh dragged Emily to one side the very second that he got the chance. ‘You do realise I am going to have to come and visit you. Alex’s son, Jonathan, follows me on Facebook. That’s what Alex meant about seeing the photos.’
‘Come and visit on one of the days, then.’ Emily shrugged, unperturbed, because she’d already thought about that. ‘We can take a few selfies and post them. If we change clothes a few times and take pictures of meals and things, we can spread the posts out and pretend that you were there for the whole weekend.’
‘We could,’ Hugh said, ‘but Cornwall’s a pretty big day trip from here.’
‘Then you’ll have to get up very early.’ Emily smiled because she knew what he was getting at. ‘You shall be driving home.’
‘So, what made you change your mind?’ Hugh asked.
‘Guilt about Friday night.’ Emily admitted a small part of her reasoning and then she was serious. ‘I don’t want to lose a friend.’
‘You’re not going to lose a friend,’ Hugh said, and then he looked into her blue eyes and tried to fathom the mystery there. ‘I’ll never work you out, Emily.’
‘No, you won’t,’ Emily said. ‘Anyway, working me out isn’t a part of our deal.’
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