For Kicks

by Jenna Bayley-Burke

  “Shh. We’re hiding,” he deadpanned.

  “If you’re making a joke, I don’t get it.”

  “When you’re scared, you hide. We’ll stay here until you feel better.”

  She shook her head. His lips softly brushed her forehead.

  “While we’re here, if there is anything you’d like to do…” his hand rested on her bare hip, “…I’m more than game.”

  “I have to check out and be ready before six thirty. The best-set starts at seven.”

  “I’ll handle check out.” He held her close. “How do you feel?”

  She snuggled closer, enjoying the cloak of blackness. “Good, kind of like after a workout. I don’t even remember setting the alarm last night.”

  “I did. I didn’t want you to be late for work and risk someone finding out.”

  “Oh.” Right, because they were a secret. One she didn’t think she’d be able to keep for very long. Unless he ended things abruptly. Then she’d be thankful no one would pity her.

  “I don’t want to chase you anymore, and if someone found out, you’d make me start all over. Now that I’ve caught you, I want to show you there’s more to life than work.”

  “And then? What happens when I’ve learned my lesson, Professor Fun?”

  “Let’s just take this as it comes, one day at a time.”

  She swallowed over the lump in her throat, her conscience mocking her with laughter. He really thought she could do this, have a fling, let go of her life plans along with her inhibitions. He bought it, the career-woman act she tried to sell the world.

  But he was the one person she wanted to see her behind the mask.

  Chapter Nine

  “You don’t strike me as the knitting type.”

  Breeze gasped, clutching the plastic learn-to-knit box against her chest. She turned her head, but wasn’t entirely surprised to find Logan next to her in the airport bookstore. She only just controlled the impulse to fling her arms around his neck and kiss him.

  “How did you find me?”

  “I fly out today too. Plus, I have your itinerary, and when I saw all your books in the trash, I figured you’d be looking to restock.” He stood so close to her at the display table, suggesting a cozy intimacy she refused to let herself buy into. “What about these?” He lifted a novel with a couple in a clutch position on the front, and another of a naked male torso.

  “What about them?” She scanned the table for a distraction. He couldn’t know she read romance novels. She always left them on the plane for the next passenger.

  “This looks like fun too.” He traded the novels for a kit promising to teach you to draw in ten simple steps. He offered the box to her and she looked inside at the coarse paper, charcoal pencils and instruction book. “You could draw something at each place you visit, like a travel diary.”

  “All the hotel rooms look the same.” Breeze peeked back at her knitting kit, wondering if she really could knit a scarf in four hours like the box claimed. Her mother would be over the moon to receive a gift she’d made instead of bought.

  “You could relax on the plane, or sleep.”

  “I can’t sleep on planes.” Or let a minute go to waste. “If you idle away your time, you’ll stall in the game of life.” It felt like her grandmother stood beside her, whispering her mantra in Breeze’s ear.

  Every moment needed to be filled with something to keep moving ahead. Work, education, chores. Something. She picked up another book on the table. Meet Your Match. The book of quizzes and questions promised to help you learn if you were dating The One. Her mother believed in soul mates, her grandmother thought the concept ridiculous. She opened the book and Logan moved to read it over her shoulder.

  “That’s a bunch of garbage.”

  “Are you an expert on dating? You must be quoted in here somewhere.” She flipped through the pages.

  It claimed if you worked through the book with your partner, you could learn in a few short hours whether your relationship would last. If only life were really so black and white.

  On paper she knew being with Logan was a bad idea. But within fifty feet of him her body overruled her mind. Not only was the timing off for work, commitment was hardwired into her brain while he didn’t seem to want anything more than a good time. He wanted a fling. She wanted a relationship, though she didn’t have time for one.

  Maybe something existed in between, like an emotionally satisfying affair. Or maybe she should just scare him off before it all got too messy.

  She turned, waving the book before him. “We should do this. It’s a fast way to get to know one another. And if we’re going to mix business with pleasure, I need to know as much about you as possible. We need rules, boundaries. I think the book will give us perspective.”

  “Why, Miss Cohen, I have no idea what you’re referring to. And, no. Some junk written by someone who’s never met us is about as reliable as your astrology book. Whatever is meant to be, will happen.”

  Breeze looked through the pages again. “Astrology said we should give it a shot.”

  He raised an eyebrow. “I should thank my lucky stars then. I’ll do it, on one condition.”

  “What?”

  “Kiss me.”

  “Logan, no.” She raised her gaze to his face. He grinned mischievously and she returned to the book. If she caught him smiling again she might give in. And then there would be no going back. “You never know who might see.”

  “The world isn’t as small as you think, Breeze.” He reached out, his fingers twisting the ends of her hair. Which she’d left down. Because he’d asked her to. “Just so you know, I’m going to do it anyway.”

  “You wouldn’t dare.” She looked up and instantly knew he would.

  “Planes go down, Breeze. I don’t live my life afraid of it, but you can’t pretend it never happens. So, whether you like it or not, I’m kissing you goodbye. We can play your game and do it in some quiet corner, or I’ll do it at the terminal at the last minute. You’ll love that. All those people asking you about it the whole flight.”

  “You’re incorrigible.”

  Without issuing a denial, he snatched the copy from her hands and another from the table, her knitting kit and sketch box and walked to the front of the store. She followed as fast on his heels as she could.

  By the time she made it to the register, her purchases were in bags and Logan was openly flirting with the salesclerk. Her chest constricted, stealing her breath.

  Flirting. Right in front of her.

  His words fake, promises empty. All designed to get her into his bed. Breeze blazed out of the shop and down the busy corridor at a fast clip.

  Jealous. Not a good sign. He flirts and she wanted to jump across the counter. Or worse, kiss him breathless. Mark her man. How juvenile could she be? And yet, she’d do anything to quiet the green-eyed monster stirring inside.

  Maybe she should duck into another store. Find a book on how to tell if you’re being scammed. Fingers gripped her arm, spinning her around.

  “What the hell was that?”

  “I should ask you.” She pulled at his fingers, but he held her firm. “You’re hurting me.”

  “No, I’m not. Why did you run out of there?”

  “I didn’t—let go of me.” He released her. Opening the bag, he pulled out a book and handed her the rest.

  “Did you see someone you knew? You bolted like the place was on fire.”

  “I didn’t like what I saw,” she whispered, realizing that they were drawing sidelong glances from the people around them.

  “What?”

  “Look, this isn’t going to work.” She lowered her voice further. “I don’t have time to waste on someone whose eye wanders at every opportunity.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “You were flirting with her,” she said behind clenched teeth, hating she couldn’t control her reaction. Being so emotional showed him too much of what she felt. She was an experiment to him—get the workah
olic to let off some steam. He didn’t feel anything really, only wanted to get her in bed again.

  “No. I don’t think so.” His brows knit together and he tilted his head to the side. “You think because of last night I need to be rude to every woman who crosses my path?”

  “Let’s just both walk away like nothing happened.” She turned back around.

  “Like hell.” He grabbed her arm again. “You’re looking for an excuse. You have to learn to trust me.”

  “You’re crazy.” Her throat tightened. How did he do that? How could he tell when she was scared?

  “A little. Especially when you close up on me.”

  “Let me go. I need to think. I don’t like feeling this out of control.”

  “Then stop thinking yourself out of being happy. Fear and distrust are dangerous enemies. They’ll blind you from what could be, and only show you things that don’t matter. Like how I speak with nameless salesclerks in airports. What does it matter when I’m there with you?”

  “It matters. I can’t have a relationship with someone who sees me as a temporary diversion. A project.”

  “That’s not what I’m doing.”

  “Isn’t it? Beyond your determination to sleep with me, I know very little about you. Your hopes, dreams, plans for the future. Which means you don’t think we have one. So why waste another minute of our time?”

  “Okay, you were obviously reading some jacked-up relationship psychology book along with your new-age stuff. Just enjoy what we have now, Breeze. Stop analyzing everything.” He extended his hand and she eyed it. “You trusted me before.”

  She took his hand, not because she believed him completely, but she didn’t care to revisit how much she had trusted him before. He brought her hand to his lips and kissed it. She cursed the tingles prickling her body.

  “Come on. Let’s go play your game.”

  She followed him to a grouping of padded chairs along a window. Outside, she saw planes waiting their turn on the runway and her breath caught. She didn’t really want to get on that plane without kissing him goodbye either. So many emotions fluttered through her mind she didn’t know which to grab on to. She hated to be confused, didn’t have time for it in her life.

  “Is it ever okay to lie?”

  Breeze opened her eyes wide and stared at him.

  “Question one.” He pointed to the book.

  “Depends on who you’re lying to.”

  “Strangely, I get that. I don’t want you to lie to me, but if my sister wants to tell me she’s still a virgin, I’ll be happy to believe her.”

  “I thought she had a baby.” A grin tickled her lips.

  “Immaculate conception.” His features were calm, as if it weren’t a joke.

  “I see,” Breeze said, trying not to giggle as she dug in the bag for her copy. Logan laughed out loud. Really loud. “What now?”

  “The questions about dominance. Do your friends call you a control freak? Do you insist on driving? According to this, you’ll be tying me up in under a week.”

  “Very funny.” As if she held the upper hand. She opened the book, looking for some ammunition to use on him. “Are you afraid of commitment?”

  “Not as much as you. Are you closer with your best friend or your mother?”

  “What is that supposed to mean?”

  “It’s a few pages over, in the part about family.”

  “Not that. I’m not afraid of commitment. I’ve worked for the same company since I was sixteen, ten years. That’s commitment.”

  “Or lack of opportunity. You never thought about working anywhere else?”

  “No.” She shook her head. She had plenty of headhunters trying to recruit her, but she liked the security of always working for the same place that had grown her grandmother’s career. “I want to be a regional vice president, like my grandmother. I’m on the right track, as long as nothing derails me.”

  “Why Mendelssohn’s though? Could it be any major retailer?”

  “I like being a legacy.”

  “Sometimes you have to blaze your own trail. She did that, right? That could be the legacy you’re meant to follow.”

  Breeze shifted in her seat and decided to turn the mirror back on him. Let him see how uncomfortable it was. “What about you? What are you committed to?”

  “Being happy.” She waited, but he didn’t elaborate.

  “That’s it? It’s awfully narcissistic.”

  “I prefer hedonistic. Life is short. You have to live life to its fullest and enjoy every second. You don’t want to look back and see wasted time. Time you spent dwelling on things that don’t matter.”

  Did she do that? She didn’t want to. She wanted to have a full life. That’s why she kept so busy, filling her brain with knowledge, busying her mind with work. And yet it never seemed to be enough.

  Everyone thought her life came up short in some ways. Her parents thought she was unhappy, her grandmother thought her career was stalling, and Logan thought she needed a good time.

  What she really needed was a way to spin this whole game around on him. Change her tactic from defense to offense.

  “What is your longest relationship?”

  Logan swallowed hard. The woman had a love affair with that word, relationship. He’d done his best to ignore it, but she refused to be ignored. As if she was trying to twist what they had into something stilted and forced, the kind of thing he always walked away from.

  Except, when she challenged him, her eyes twinkled. She thought she had him. She was playing…him. He grinned. Playing was what he’d been trying to get her to do, after all.

  “My longest relationship? My sister, I guess.”

  “Very funny. Romantic relationship. Have you ever been married? Engaged?”

  “No and no. It never really gets that far.”

  “Because you’re commitment phobic.”

  “Hey, I’m not the one who left without saying goodbye and then suggested we pretend like last night never happened.”

  Her eyes widened and knew he’d pushed too far. So focused on the pursuit, on getting her to admit she needed to live a little, he hadn’t stopped to consider how that realization might affect her. Or the pressure it would put on him to live up to her expectations. Which he was failing to do right now.

  On the outside she might be the model of a modern professional woman, but inside lurked the heart of a traditionalist. She wanted to know him, try having a relationship, albeit in secret.

  Even though the term relationship made him itch, her willingness to try and frame them into something felt like his biggest accomplishment of all. Last night she’d trusted him, and that demanded he live up to that trust.

  He opened the book, looking for a way to get to know her too. Because he needed to know why he felt so good. Why the sex was better, why his heart beat faster when he made her laugh, why he was so determined to challenge someone willing to let him walk away.

  “What do you want to do when you retire? When you’ve gone as far as you want to in your career and can do what you please.”

  “My grandmother hops from one cruise ship to the next. She worked hard her whole career and was given a nice payment to retire. Maybe I’ll travel like that.”

  “They forced her into retirement and you’re still loyal to the company?”

  “It was a six-figure pay out.”

  He shook his head. “That’s your grandmother. What do you want to do?”

  She shrugged and looked for a new question. “I’ll worry about it after I cash my check.”

  “I want to get a house on the coast. Not too far from wherever my kids are so they can come visit.”

  Kids, he wanted kids. That meant he wasn’t the commitment-phobe she thought. Did that mean she’d stumbled upon a great guy who saw something in her and wanted it enough to pursue her with the intensity of a Black Friday shopper? Could she handle that? Her fingers busied with the pages. Find another question, quick!

  “D
o you want kids, Breeze?”

  Too late. She buried herself behind the tiny book before answering. “I don’t think I should.”

  “Why?” Logan spoke calmly, as if he hadn’t just turned on the garbage disposal of her family history.

  “My mother has strong feelings about how much my grandmother worked.”

  Logan put a finger atop her book and lowered it, forcing her to either meet his gaze or admit avoiding him. “But not about your grandfather?”

  “He had the same issue with how much my grandmother worked. He left when my mom went to college.”

  “Oh. Well, some people balance better than others.”

  She straightened the lapels of her suit jacket. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “Probably not.” He gave a shrug and gave his attention back to the pages.

  New subject, pronto. She used the words of the book to say what she didn’t dare. “Let’s talk about sex.”

  “In the abstract, or the fun way?” His lecherous grin made her look away. She couldn’t let him distract her with passion again. Not here.

  “Define faithful.” She scrutinized him as he thought, realizing that maybe he wasn’t against relationships, just not looking for a lasting one with her.

  “You want to be with someone else, you tell me first.”

  “Define be with.” Breeze studied his face, looking for cracks in the honest façade he wore.

  “Trust.”

  “I think it means technically, where is your line for cheating. Is it sex, kissing, touching?”

  His eyes darkened, and she heard his breath quicken. “You feel for someone else what you feel for me, you tell me before you act on it.”

  “I can’t think of anyone else, but you can flirt with random strangers.” And it scared me so bad I can’t think straight.

  “I wasn’t flirting.” He sounded annoyed. Good.

  “You were flirting. You were smiling at her.” You’re only supposed to look at me that way.

  “I’m happy.” He leaned closer, laying a hand on her knee. “Had an amazing night last night. Can’t stop smiling.”

  “I’m serious.”