Ursa Major

by Mary Winter

  “Don’t do this,” Ken said. “You have to think about the firm.”

  “I am thinking about the firm. What the hell do you think I’ve been doing these last six months? Sitting on my ass and hoping things would work out. Well it’s not happening!” Bill’s voice grew to a roar loud enough to probably be heard by the other company across the all.

  Sarah pushed her chair back, thinking she ought to warn the two men to keep their voices down. In politics appearances counted. If word of this got out it would irreparably harm Hodges & Associates.

  A door slammed.

  Moments later Ken poked his head into her office. “Do you have a moment, Sarah?” He stepped inside and closed the door, taking the chair across from her desk before she could answer.

  “Sure. What can I help you with?” She thought about mentioning the fight and decided against it. Ken had been in this business a long time. He didn’t need her to remind him about appearances.

  “How are you coming with your report? We really need to see it by the end of the week.” Ken remained perched on the edge of the chair, as if he expected to be interrupted at any moment.

  Across the hall, Bill stomped and stormed around his office. Occasional mutterings, mostly curse words, filtered through the wall.

  “I’m working on it. There’s a lot of ground to cover.” And a lot of half-truths to write. She looked at her boss, noticing the first time the gray hair at his temples, the lines around his eyes. He looked tired, haggard even. “Is everything okay? You know you can count on me to get the job done.”

  “I hope so.” Ken shook his head and stood. “I know I was a bit rough on you when you were in Alaska. I’m sorry. Things… Things have changed. You know what you need to do.”

  The man standing before her bore little resemblance to the boss who had hired her. She ached for him. He acted like someone pushed into a corner and not happy about it, yet unable to free himself. “We all have to make our own choices, Ken. Some of us have lines that we just can’t cross.” There, she hinted, probably not too subtly, that she hated the idea of skewing her report just to make some Senator happy.

  “Some of us have no choice,” he said, and with a sad look, opened the door and left. It closed behind him with a soft click.

  Sarah stared at the closed door. The sounds from Bill’s office died down enough to allow her to focus. She turned on the radio, finding a classical music station. Turning the music up, she reread the last paragraph and started to type.

  Across the hall the shouting started again.

  She couldn’t work like this.

  Saving her work, she shut down her laptop and slipped it into its bag. She made sure she had everything, including her files, then headed down the hall to tell Ken she would work from home. He was in Bill’s office, and from the sounds of it, the two of them were about to fight again.

  The hell with it. She was leaving. If they didn’t like it, they had her cell phone number. She received a few pitying glances in the elevator, and she wondered how far word of her firm’s downfall had spread. Something had happened while she’d been in Alaska. She made a few quick phone calls as soon as she arrived home, but her coworkers knew as little as she did. All of a sudden Bill seemed to go off the deep end. They worked from home to avoid the noise.

  At least her home was quiet, and she got several pages written on her report before deciding to call it a night. She reread what she’d typed and came to the conclusion that she would not write the report Ken wanted. She’d give them the truth. What they did to it was out of her hands.

  She just had to talk to her sister.

  Nat wouldn’t be happy. Nat feared for her job, and frankly, Sarah thought her sister should just slap the Senator with a sexual harassment suit and call it quits. There were plenty of other people to work for. Sure, none probably paid as well as the Senator, but at least she wouldn’t have to worry about threats and retaliation.

  The conversation she needed to have with her sister—a serious, adult conversation—couldn’t be had over the phone. Deciding to bring supper over, she called her favorite take out place, and ten minutes later was on her way to pick it up. Bribing the girls, and Nat’s husband, with food, would keep them busy for a while so she and Nat could talk. And, the dinner would probably be welcomed.

  Dinner had finished and Nat’s daughters worked on homework in the living room under the watchful eye of their father. When the family was together like this, Sarah hated the uncharitable thoughts she’d had about Jim. Though he acted like he could go back to work, she could tell from the way he winced getting out of chairs and the careful way that he moved he still didn’t feel well. Getting on a ladder and working construction probably wasn’t the best for him under these circumstances.

  Under the guise of helping her sister with the few dishes, Sarah followed Nat into the dining room. She started rinsing the plates. “Are things any better?”

  “I think so.” Sarah started putting cups into the dishwasher. “The Senator has seemed less on edge lately. He talked about Bill coming through. I guess you’re going to write that report and everything is going to be okay?”

  The naive hope in her sister’s voice had Sarah hating herself. “Actually, that’s what I wanted to talk to you about.”

  Nat stopped, holding the cup over the counter. “What do you mean?”

  Gently, Sarah took the glass out of her sister’s hands, reaching around her to set it on the top rack of the dishwasher. “I wanted to talk to you about that.”

  “You’re not doing something stupid, are you?”

  Sarah stiffened, battling the flash of indignation that shot through her at her sister’s words. Nat had no idea what was “stupid” and what wasn’t when it came to her job. “Nat,” Sarah warned.

  Nat slammed the dishwasher closed and glanced back toward the living room at her family. “You promised to save us. You’re not forgetting about that, are you?” Nat clutched her hand so hard that Sarah wondered if she’d get bruises.

  “Sit down,” Sarah ordered. “And stay calm. You don’t want to upset Jim or the girls do you?”

  Nat shook her head. “No, I don’t.” She sank into a dining room chair and rubbed the back of her neck. “I just don’t want to lose my job. I don’t care what happens. I just don’t want to lose my job.”

  “I don’t want you to lose your job.” Sarah rested her hand on her sister’s shoulder. The dishes forgotten, Sarah mustered the courage to tell her sister the truth. She was going to write the report her conscience demanded and hope for the best, even though she expected the worst. “But what would happen if you did?”

  A small, hiccupping sob bubbled from her sister’s throat.

  “Nat, don’t cry.” Sarah breathed deeply. If her younger sister broke down, Sarah didn’t know what she’d do. She never intended to make Sarah cry. Except her sister needed to face the truth. If Sarah followed her heart, and right now she didn’t think she could do anything but, then her sister might very well lose her job.

  “I’m sorry.” Nat dashed away the first hint of tears. “I don’t know what I’d do. I suppose I could get another job. Hopefully it would have the same benefits. Jim’s doctor thinks he can go back to work in six weeks. If you could hold off…” Nat searched Sarah’s face. “You can’t, can you?”

  “No, I can’t. I don’t want to do anything to hurt you. I know I promised to take care of you. But I have to do this, Nat. I have to follow my heart.”

  “You met someone in Alaska, didn’t you?”

  Sarah gasped. “How did—?” She clamped her lips closed, afraid to let the truth be known. “No. I didn’t.”

  “Sarah! You couldn’t lie to me in high school when you wanted me to cover for you while you went out with Dick Carlson. You can’t lie now.”

  Heat crept over Sarah’s cheeks. “It doesn’t matter. I’ll never see him again.” And that, more so than the hell she might possibly put her sister through, hurt her even more. “I won’t see hi
m again.”

  “Don’t talk like that. Tell me about him? Is he handsome? Of course he is.” Nat glanced at the still-open dishwasher. “Let’s finish the dishes and I’ll send the girls up to bed, then we can talk.”

  Sarah stood, thankful to have something to do with her hands. She used to share everything with her sister. At the thought of revealing Liam’s existence, talking about him, about his kisses, a vice clamped around her heart and this time, she wiped away the first hints of tears. I love you, Liam, wherever you are. I’m doing this for you. You know that, right? She didn’t receive, nor expect, an answer. Instead, she took a deep breath.

  Nat needed the distraction. On the verge of losing her job, because of Sarah’s action, Nat needed something on which to focus. If it was a sexy man in Alaska pining for her sister, then Sarah vowed to give Nat that kind of escape. It was the least she could do. No matter if her heart was breaking inside.

  “His name is Liam, and he was the guide my firm hired to show me around.” Sarah started to talk about Liam and their relationship. She kept his secret about him being a shifter and the full moon ritual. Everything she considered safe to tell, such as tranquilizing the bear in at the oil drilling site, she told. The more she spoke, the more at ease Nat became. Soon, the dishwasher whirred and the two women enjoyed a glass of tea.

  “I understand,” Nat said. She dipped the tea bag into her mug. “I really do. I know you worry about me, and I appreciate what you’re doing. You love him, don’t you?”

  Sarah nodded.

  “And you have to write your report so his home isn’t destroyed, don’t you?”

  Sarah nodded again.

  “You’re my big sister, and I love you. Whatever happens, I can deal with it. I’m a big girl.”

  Sarah’s throat tightened. Unable to speak, she pulled her sister into a hug. Her little sis had finally grown up, and Sarah couldn’t be prouder. “Thank you,” she whispered, and hoped like hell she hadn’t made the wrong choice.

  Chapter Twenty

  Sarah had no idea what the future would bring, but at least her part in this was done. For once, she had the elevator to herself as she descended back to ground level. With her laptop and her purse slung over her shoulder, the sun shining bright through the building’s glass walls, she had a free afternoon to do whatever she wanted. And to try not to think about the report she’d just laid on her boss’ desk.

  She didn’t want to go home. Sitting in her apartment and staring at the four walls held no appeal. Her sister was at work, her nieces at school. She really had the entire afternoon to herself.

  She made it to her car, flirting with the idea of spending the afternoon at the zoo. Wandering the paths and watching the animals, reminding herself that she could make a difference fit very well with her mood at the moment, and with a smile she pulled into traffic. Sarah switched off the radio. She didn’t want to listen to talk radio, not with the chatter about the happenings, or not-happenings, in Congress. All of it reminded her of the shallow, jaded industry in which she worked.

  Alaska had changed her.

  Liam had changed her.

  She eased onto the interstate, not quite sure what she’d do from here. Turning in her report seemed like a resignation of sorts, though she hadn’t officially given up her job. She could return to Alaska. Though Liam had told her that they could never see each other anymore, she had no doubts that she could return. Doing so would mean giving up everything she had here.

  No easy answers came. Her thoughts chased her all the way to the zoo. She paid her admission and started wandering through the exhibits. Unconsciously, her feet carried her toward the South American exhibit and the spectacled bears. There were no grizzlies in the national zoo, a fact she lamented. It was the national zoo. Every animal that was a national treasure should be there, and in her mind, that included the grizzlies. After all, there were grizzlies in Yellowstone.

  She leaned against the railing and watched a bear snoozing in the sun. It lay on its side, four paws stretched out. Rolling over on its back, it yawned, revealing great teeth. It stood, shook itself, and gave her the uncanny image of Liam waking up in the morning.

  Sarah glanced at her watch.

  It was late morning in Alaska and not for the first time, she wondered what Liam might be doing.

  A family walked by the exhibits, a father with his young daughter on his shoulders, the mother pushing a stroller with a baby. That could be her and Liam someday. Except, she had no idea if they could even have a family. Her hand dropped to her abdomen. At least one of the times they’d made love they hadn’t used protection. She probably would be lucky. The high pressure world of politics played havoc with her cycle. If she wasn’t, then would Liam want to see her. Could he see her? And would that really be unlucky?

  A man dressed in dark jeans and a white shirt stood not far away. His mirrored glasses gave nothing away. He seemed to watch her watching the family, then turned his attention back to the sea lions next door. They barked and splashed, putting on a show for their somewhat captive audience.

  The stranger reminded Sarah of Liam. Not so much in his bone structure or his build—she was sure Liam was broader in the shoulders and a bit taller—but the intense way he looked at the world. He could just as easily been an off duty secret service agent. Something about him screamed secret agent man.

  She forced herself to look away and watch the bears. “What have I done?” she muttered to herself. She toyed with the strap of her purse, twisting and untwisting it uncertain how long it would be before the hammer would fall. Had Ken even read her report by now? She closed her eyes and swallowed hard.

  Making the right decisions had never been easy.

  Sarah rubbed the bridge of her nose. The man hadn’t moved, though he focused on the sea lions. For a moment she thought about going down to him, asking him. That would be silly. I can’t be that paranoid, even if Liam did tell me people would watch over me. She forced herself to look away and focus on the antics of a mother and cub. Had Liam been a baby bear? The thought of such cuddly cuteness made her smile. She bet he was an adorable cub.

  “I don’t think I was ever that cute,” Liam’s voice whispered in her ear.

  She felt his body behind her, his arms on either side of her. His chin brushed the top of her head.

  “Liam?” She stiffened and stared straight ahead. If she turned around and he wasn’t there…she couldn’t take that happening. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the man in the sunglasses straightening and heading down the path as if nothing had happened. “He’s with you, isn’t he?”

  “Just keeping you safe until I can get here.” Liam brushed a kiss across the top of her head. “I’ve missed you.”

  “Why are you here? I thought we couldn’t see each other ever again.” She kept her voice down. A young family, this time with twin girls and an older brother, paused between the sea lions and the bears. The bear exhibit was on a short lane off the main Beaver Valley trail, and she and Liam stood close to the very end. Sarah licked her lips, still not quite sure she wanted to turn around. “I finished my work. I did what you asked.”

  “What you wanted to do.”

  She nodded. Closing her eyes, she took a shuddering breath. “You’re really here, aren’t you?” Her voice broke, and she turned in his arms, giving him the biggest, tightest hug she’d ever given anyone else in her life. Burying her face against his chest, she battled against the hiccupping sobs. All her fear and worry broke free, like the cork popping out of a champagne bottle, and suddenly, with him in her arms, all of this seemed too harsh, too real, and she was very, very afraid.

  “Yes, I’m really here.” He crushed her to him, embracing her as if he hadn’t seen her in a year instead of just a few days.

  Sarah breathed deeply, her sobs abating as she snuggled closer to him. “I missed you so much,” she whispered.

  “I missed you, too.” He released her just enough to stand by her side and steer her toward the rai
ling around the spectacled bear exhibit.

  The large male rose onto his hind legs and sniffed the air. Dropping to all fours, he gave a series of short low chuffing breaths, then proceeded to spray the closest tree.

  “I’m no threat to you,” Liam said under his breath. He glanced at the female bear and her cubs, then back to the male, careful to keep from looking straight at the big bear.

  “He senses your bear?”

  Liam shrugged. “He knows another male is in his territory. I try to avoid bear exhibits. The keepers always wonder what set them off.” Wrapping an arm around her waist, he steered her away from the bears and toward the neighboring sea lion exhibit. A short distance away from the bears, he stopped. Cupping her chin, he tilted her face to meet his. “So are you happy to see me?”

  Standing on tiptoes, she pressed a kiss across his lips. “Happy? These aren’t sad tears.” She waved her hand in front of her face, trying to stem the telltale flood. “So why are you here?” She glanced around, but the other man wasn’t anywhere in sight. Whatever he’d been watching for, now that Liam was here, he wasn’t needed anymore. The thought chilled her with the memory of Bill and Ken’s conversations. Could she really have been in that much danger?

  “I talked to the Quintursa and let’s just say that they see things my way. Let’s talk.” He steered her past the sea lion exhibit and back toward the main trail.

  “Shouldn’t we do that in private?” Sarah glanced at the people and families on the trail. She supposed if they needed to talk, then at least here they would be in public, but someone might overhear.

  “Honey, if we have some privacy, we won’t be talking.” His hand swept down her back and over her buttocks with a lingering caress. “This is much better.”

  Sarah shivered. Her nipples pebbled, and she wrapped her arm around Liam’s waist, leaning into him. She knew they looked no different than the other couples meandering through the zoo. She felt different. It wasn’t just the knowledge about Liam’s abilities, nor the Quintursa or her job. Here she was, in a city that she loved, with a man she loved. She’d never allowed herself to think about such things.