Truly Yours Historical Collection December 2014

by Susan Page Davis, Paige Winship Dooly, Connie Stevens

  Miss Pearl slipped her arm through Tessa’s. “Since you’ll be using my kitchen to do the baking for the boardinghouse, I’d like for you to move in today, if that’s all right with you.”

  Tessa gave the woman an impulsive hug. Her throat was too tight for any other reply.

  Miss Pearl beamed. “Gideon, can you help Tessa move her things to the boardinghouse this evening?”

  He gave her a silly, schoolboy grin. “My pleasure.”

  Gideon loaded Tessa’s trunk onto Cully’s old wheelbarrow and dusted his hands on his pants. “Is that everything?”

  Tessa stepped out the door of the shed with the kitten in her arms. Her smile set Gideon’s heart tumbling. “Everything except Daisy.”

  He reached out and scratched the cat behind the ears. “You want to put her in the trunk?”

  “Of course not,” Tessa sputtered. She threw a defensive look at him and broke into a giggle at his teasing grin. “I’ll just leave her in the shed, and as soon as I’ve finished talking to Mr. Kilgore, I’ll come and get her.”

  The mention of Kilgore’s name dampened the anticipation that had been skittering through Gideon’s middle all day. “Do you want me to come with you?”

  She shook her head. “No. You go ahead to Miss Pearl’s with those things. This won’t take long, and I’ll meet you over there.”

  Doubt nipped at Gideon. If he knew Kilgore, the man would do his best to intimidate her. Gideon wanted to insist on accompanying her, but her independent spirit waved like a flag on the Fourth of July. “All right. But if you don’t show up at Miss Pearl’s place in a few minutes, I’m going to come looking for you.”

  The moment he arrived at Miss Pearl’s back door, the woman bustled about, directing him to carry Tessa’s things to a small but clean room just off the kitchen.

  “This quilt has always reminded me of spring flowers,” she said as she smoothed the cover over the bed. “I hope Tessa likes it.” Miss Pearl fluffed up the pillow and straightened the rag rug on the floor.

  Gideon nodded. The room was a startling contrast to the dismal shed. He set down the last of Tessa’s belongings and left Miss Pearl to fuss over her preparations. As he descended the back porch steps, he caught sight of Tessa coming through the shadows.

  She smiled a greeting and deposited Daisy on the porch. “Thank you, Gideon, for carrying my things.”

  “It was my pleasure. Did Kilgore give you a hard time?”

  A tight-lipped smile tugged a dimple into her face. “He told me I couldn’t quit because I was fired. Again.”

  He could only imagine the pompous man’s bluster. “Either way, you don’t have to deal with him anymore.”

  “Thanks to you.”

  The evening breeze lifted sandy strands of hair across her cheek, and an unseen hand pressed him a step closer. His fingers took on a mind of their own as they reached to brush the wisp of hair from her face. She raised widened eyes to his, and his heart rolled over in his chest. Twilight’s fading rays fell across her, casting bronzed reflections in her eyes. Muted sounds of the evening hushed as he focused his gaze on her lips. The blood rushed in his ears. He gently cupped her chin and started to lower his face to hers.

  When his lips were mere inches from hers, she turned her head and pulled back. “Thank you again, Gideon. For everything. Miss Pearl must be waiting for me.” She darted like a scared rabbit up the porch steps and through the door.

  thirteen

  Tessa couldn’t stop staring at the cozy, cheerful room that was her new home. It wasn’t much larger than the shed, but the difference made her feel as though she’d just been released from a dungeon to live in the king’s palace. The blue flowers on the pitcher and basin reminded her of the blue in Mama’s eyes, and the colorful quilt smelled of fresh lavender. A crisp white curtain hung at the small window.

  Miss Pearl stood in the doorway. “I hope it’s not too cramped, dear.”

  “Oh no, ma’am. It’s … it’s …” Her eyes traveled around the space until they came to rest on the oil lamp on the small dresser. “It’s wonderful.” She crossed the room and touched the sparkling glass globe of the lamp. “May I really use this?”

  Miss Pearl laughed. “Of course, dear. There’s a box of wood matches in the top drawer of your dresser. Now, you must be tired, so I’ll leave you to get settled.”

  Tessa thanked her and eased down on the bed, relishing its softness. She wondered if she’d be able to sleep on a comfortable bed after sleeping on nothing but her tattered quilt on the hard ground for so long. She looked forward to finding out.

  There weren’t many things in her trunk or cabinet to tuck away or hang, but she extracted each item and smoothed it with her hands before giving it a home on one of the wooden pegs or a dresser drawer. She reached into the cabinet and pulled out the cracked coffee mug that served as her candle holder. The pitiful short stub of melted wax in the bottom of the cup was no longer needed now that she could sit and read by lamplight.

  As she pushed the nearly empty trunk to the foot of the bed, the memory of Gideon touching her face crossed her mind like a web of silken threads. The touch of his fingers against her cheek sent flutters through her stomach. She could still feel his breath on her face.

  She closed her eyes and tried to imagine how it might have felt if she’d not turned her head. Gideon’s face lowering to hers caught her completely off guard. It never occurred to her that he might wish to kiss her.

  “Why did I pull away from him?” No answer was forthcoming. “I wonder what was going through his mind.” One thing was certain: She couldn’t begin to describe what was going through hers.

  Tessa lay awake half the night tussling with worrisome thoughts. Her new bed was comfortable enough to invite sleep, but nagging images of Gideon loomed every time she closed her eyes. His tender expression and gentle touch lingered softly in her mind—like a melody she didn’t want to forget. But her response to his touch drove her brow into a furrowed frown.

  When she finally drifted off, she startled awake what seemed like only a moment later. The conversation she’d overheard between Mr. Kilgore and Mr. Behr prodded her conscience. She’d fretted all week, wondering whether or not she should tell Gideon what she’d heard. But then she’d have to admit to eavesdropping. She’d almost made up her mind to tell him last night when he carried her belongings to the boardinghouse. When he leaned down, appearing like he intended to kiss her, everything flew right out of her head. She hadn’t given the overheard conversation another thought until now.

  Giving up on sleep, she rose, dressed, and padded softly to the kitchen to stoke the fire in the cookstove. By the time Miss Pearl joined her, the fragrance of cinnamon spice coffee cake, fluffy biscuits, bacon, and coffee filled the air.

  After the boarders finished their breakfasts, Tessa went to work kneading bread dough and setting it to rise. Later that morning, two warm, fresh loaves sat side by side and Tessa was taking cookies from the oven.

  “I feel positively lazy!” Miss Pearl declared with a chuckle as she entered the kitchen.

  Tessa hoisted a basket of apples to the worktable. “I thought I’d make an apple cobbler for dessert.” She pushed a plate of cookies in Miss Pearl’s direction. “Would you like some warm sugar cookies with your tea?”

  “Mercy sakes, you’re going to spoil me, child.”

  Tessa gave Miss Pearl a shy smile. “I’d like to spoil you. It’s just my way of saying thank you.”

  Miss Pearl patted Tessa’s shoulder. “Now, I haven’t done a thing. It’s all Gideon’s doing.” She picked up an empty basket from the pantry. “I’m going to pick some green beans from the garden.” The woman stepped out the back door, leaving Tessa to work in solitude.

  All Gideon’s doing. The very mention of his name set her stomach to quivering. She wondered where he was now, how close to Dubuque and how soon to return.

  Her unsettled heart pulled her first one way and then another when she invited last night’
s memory back to her mind. When Gideon’s lips were inches from hers, she’d felt unable to draw a breath. His nearness paralyzed her, like time had stopped. When she’d escaped to the safety of her room and leaned against the closed door with her heart pounding in her ears, her legs barely held her up. Even now, as she recalled the touch of his fingers on her face, a shiver danced through her.

  But why? Was it fear? Or something else?

  When the drunken man outside the saloon grabbed her wrist that awful night, a nauseous, dreadful fear caused her to tremble. Gideon’s touch was completely opposite.

  “Why did I turn away from him?” Her own whisper accused her of being fickle. Her eyelids stung. She longed to talk to Mama. Miss Pearl was a sweet lady, but Tessa feared she didn’t know the woman well enough to confide in her yet. Mama always knew her heart and could help her sort out her tumultuous emotions. To whom would she run now?

  One of the psalms she’d read last night said God was a Father to the fatherless. The concept was almost too precious to ponder. If she claimed it, did that mean she could talk to Him when she was confused or lonely? Right now, she was both.

  “God?”

  She paused to gather all her tumbled thoughts.

  “God, I don’t know how to explain this, but I guess that’s silly. I don’t have to explain anything to You.” She closed her eyes and sighed. “I’m so mixed up inside. Sometimes I want so badly to be close to Gideon that I ache. But when he’s near, my heart feels like it’s going to jump out of my chest, my hands won’t be still, and all I want to do is run away.”

  She’d hoped speaking the words might help put her unruly emotions into perspective, but instead her own voice sounded hollow and her plea directionless. All she could do was pray God understood.

  Daisy came tiptoeing into the kitchen with her tail held straight up like a tiny, furry flagpole.

  Tessa scooped her up and sat on one of the kitchen chairs, settling the kitten in her lap. A twinge of envy pricked her. “God, sometimes I wish I could curl up in Your lap.”

  Daisy purred and kneaded her paws into the folds of Tessa’s apron.

  “What if I hurt Gideon’s feelings last night?” Her heart spun like a whirlwind. “He’s been so good and kind I can’t stand thinking I might have offended him. But what I feel for Gideon isn’t just because he’s good and kind.”

  She looked out the window, beyond the yard, and through the trees. The distant hillside was dotted with headstones and makeshift crosses. Mama rested there.

  “God, I don’t know what to do. Help me understand. When I was a little girl and I was hurt or angry—or I couldn’t understand why things were the way they were—I could always talk to Mama.” Tears slipped down her face. “She helped me sort out my confusion when nothing in the world made sense. I wish she could tell me what to do about my feelings for Gideon.”

  She stroked the purring kitten in her lap, and Daisy pressed her head against Tessa’s hand in a gesture of unfeigned love and complete trust. It reminded her of the times she’d spent as a little girl snuggled beside her mother.

  “God is our refuge and our sanctuary, honey girl.”

  As a child, she hadn’t known what those words meant. Maturing into adulthood, she walked the paths of adversity, grief, doubt, and confusion. When she found herself alone, the promises in God’s Word offered sweet assurance that she could run to Him for sanctuary and comfort.

  She lifted her face toward heaven. “God … Father … I love You.”

  Tessa glanced at the clock ticking away on the parlor mantle. Two fifteen. Plenty of time to run to the mercantile for a few things.

  She slipped into her room to wash her face and tidy her hair. Her appearance in the small mirror over the washstand disturbed her. Since she no longer needed to save her money to pay rent for the winter, perhaps she could purchase a new hair ribbon or even a bit of lace to add to her collar. Such an extravagance might take some getting used to.

  It wasn’t hard to find Miss Pearl. The woman’s humming could be heard coming from the front porch where Tessa found her sweeping.

  “Miss Pearl, I’m going to the mercantile. Is there anything you need?”

  Miss Pearl’s broom halted as the woman placed a finger on her chin. “Yes, I need some laundry blue and a couple of pounds of coffee. Tell Martha to put it on my account. And if there is anything you need for your baking here, put that on my account as well.”

  Tessa hesitated a moment. “I thought I’d make a gingerbread cake for tomorrow if that would suit you. But I’ll need some ginger and nutmeg.”

  “Gingerbread cake is one of my favorites—and Gideon’s, too. Go ahead and get the spices, dear, and anything else you think we might need for the next few days.” The woman resumed her sweeping and humming.

  Tessa patted her pocket to ensure her own money was safely tucked away before stepping down the cobblestone walkway that led to the white picket gate. She might even purchase a hair clasp if it wasn’t too costly.

  The mercantile was a pleasant walk down the shady street and around the corner. Miss Pearl had told her of a shortcut through the back alley, but it was such a beautiful day that she had no desire to cut her errand short.

  The house on the corner had hollyhocks growing beside the porch. The deep pinks drew her attention. She wondered if Gideon would find a hair ribbon that color becoming on her.

  She turned the corner and proceeded down the main street through town. Just ahead, a door opened and a man exited an office. Tessa slowed her steps. The man had his back to her, but she still recognized Mr. Behr. He appeared to be speaking to someone behind him still inside. When the other person followed Mr. Behr onto the boardwalk, Tessa halted. She had no desire for a confrontation with Mr. Kilgore, given his ugly parting words to her the previous evening. The alley that bordered the building the two men exited provided a place for her to slip behind a stack of crates. She pressed her back against the wood-sided wall and waited for the men to pass. But they didn’t pass by. They stopped right at the entrance of the alley, not ten feet from where she stood. Tessa peeked through the slatted sides of the crates that concealed her.

  The sound of Mr. Kilgore’s voice sent prickles up her arms. “I can assure you the Standridge brothers will see things my way. Once the sawmill is ours, the only other enterprise we lack is Maxwell’s Mercantile.”

  “You’re so certain of your persuasion with both brothers Standridge?”

  A mirthless chuckle preceded Mr. Kilgore’s reply. “Every man has his price, Mr. Behr. Ben and Earl Standridge both resent splitting their profits with each other. Once I convince each of them separately that his brother intends to sell his portion of the sawmill, it will just be a simple matter of drawing up a bill of sale. We’ll take over that business for a fraction of what it’s worth. Taking ownership of the sawmill will give us the advantage with the land speculators.”

  Mr. Behr stood stroking his beard.

  Tessa sucked in a slow, silent breath and held it. Neither man looked in her direction, but the guilt that plagued her earlier over listening to the men’s conversation at the hotel now swelled with each passing moment.

  “And young Mr. Maxwell?”

  Tessa’s lungs ached to expel the breath she held, but Mr. Behr’s question locked it in place.

  Mr. Kilgore struck a match on the bottom of his boot and lit his cigar. “Gideon Maxwell is in for a surprise. I’ll let you know when I have the details worked out.” He puffed on the cigar. “As soon as that mapmaker, Feldman, gets those altered land grant maps back to us, we can set our plans into motion. I just hope they’ll look like the originals.”

  “You have nothing to fear, Mr. Kilgore. I’ve seen some of Mr. Feldman’s work. He is truly an artist. The people with whom I work recommended him, and they are the best at what they do.”

  “Good. I don’t settle for anything less, and I don’t allow anyone to stand in my way.”

  Gideon nudged the gelding through a wooded area an
d picked his way around a patch of scrub pines. His stomach rumbled a complaint, reminding him that breakfast was long past, but he pushed on. He hoped cutting through the woods would shave a couple of hours off his journey.

  The memory of last night dogged him every mile. The alarmed expression on Tessa’s face kept intruding across his mind. He couldn’t run from it. “I practically forced myself on her. No wonder she ran off.”

  The horse twitched his ears and snorted like he agreed with every word.

  “Why did I do that? If some guy had taken liberties with Martha, I’d have punched him in the nose.” He pulled off his hat and wiped the sweat from his face with his neckerchief.

  The warbling of a meadowlark provided the background music as Tessa’s image slipped easily into his thoughts again. Her face felt exactly as he thought it would—velvety soft, like the supple kidskin gloves he sold in the store. No, softer than that. That loose wisp of hair that had grazed her cheek resembled the silk threads he remembered his mother using. The radiance of the sunset behind her had given her an ethereal glow. How could he not lean down to kiss her?

  “But she turned her head and pulled away. Why did she do that?”

  As he emerged from the stretch of woods, the road lay just ahead. He nudged the chestnut gelding into a mile-eating lope.

  Minutes later, as he crested a hill, a group of three men with cumbersome-looking equipment appeared in the distance. One set a boxlike apparatus atop a tripod while the other two proceeded farther across the meadow with their gear.

  “Surveyors.” What were they surveying way out here?

  fourteen

  “She was acting so strange.”

  Gideon listened as Martha told him about Tessa’s visit to the mercantile.

  “She looked at several different ribbons but didn’t buy any. When I asked her if she was looking for a particular color, she acted like she didn’t even hear me. Then she left the things she’d purchased for the boardinghouse sitting on the counter and walked out the door without them. I had to run after her to give them to her.”