Truly Yours Historical Collection December 2014

by Susan Page Davis, Paige Winship Dooly, Connie Stevens

  “Here we are.” The wagon rattled to a stop. Jesse swung down from the seat and held out his arms to help Megan. Seana still slept, so Megan put a blanket under her sister’s head and reached out to Jesse. As he lifted her over the side, her breath caught at the feelings flowing through her. The look in his cinnamon eyes held her fast.

  When Megan’s feet landed, her legs buckled. She would have fallen if Jesse hadn’t pulled her against him. She could feel his heart racing almost as fast as hers.

  “I guess I sat too long.” She tried to laugh, but couldn’t.

  Jesse’s arms tightened. Megan’s hand seemed to have a life of its own as her fingers caressed his cheek. The very air around them vibrated with emotion. Megan couldn’t breathe. Her small hand slid behind Jesse’s head as she tilted her face. Afterwards, she could never be sure who initiated the kiss; she only knew she didn’t want it to end.

  “Megan.” Jesse’s husky whisper told her more than a long discourse. He cupped her cheek with his hand and kissed her until she was breathless. Even then she didn’t want to stop. She’d never experienced feelings like this before.

  Jesse trailed a line of kisses across her face, then rested his cheek against her forehead. His rapid heartbeat and breathing told her he was as affected by the kisses as she was. This must be what Momma and Papa felt for each other. Megan smiled at the memory of her parents’ moments of affection, the clear adoration they had for one another.

  “We’d better get out our lunch.” Jesse stepped back, retrieving the package of sandwiches he’d purchased. Megan checked on Seana, still sound asleep, before walking hand in hand with Jesse up the rise to have their lunch. She felt almost like a shy schoolgirl on a first outing as her husband spread one of the spare blankets on the ground and helped her to sit.

  The food was delicious, although Megan wasn’t sure what she’d eaten. All her senses seemed to be heightened. She noticed the brush of the breeze against her cheek and smelled the fresh scent of spring in the air. The cushion of dried grass beneath the blanket felt like a feather pillow. Every movement Jesse made, every word he spoke, every smile and look of love in his eyes echoed inside her.

  “We’d best be going.” Jesse stood and held out his hand to help her up. “I want to be home before dark.” After folding the blanket, Megan followed Jesse to the wagon. She didn’t want this time to end.

  Seana’s soft breathing told Megan she still slept. Jesse finished checking the harnesses and helped Megan into the back.

  “Wait.” Megan placed her hand on his chest. Once more his closeness stole her breath and her thoughts. “I. . .” She glanced again at Seana, then back to Jesse. “Would you mind if I sat up with you for awhile until Seana wakes up?”

  Jesse grinned. He slid his hands from her waist to around her back, tugging her close. He gave her a tender, heart-melting kiss. “I wouldn’t mind at all.” In one swift move, Jesse lifted her to the seat. Megan fussed with her skirts, trying to calm her racing pulse. How could one man be so strong that he could lift someone like her as if she were nothing?

  The horses seemed eager to resume the journey. They set off at a good clip, and Megan could almost see pictures of the barn and food in their thoughts. Jesse slipped his arm around her shoulders. She stiffened in surprise for a moment, then relaxed and gave him a shy smile. Leaning her head against his shoulder, she sighed in contentment.

  “Why were you passing through here last January, Jesse?”

  Silence stretched as he stroked her arm. She felt the light kiss he pressed against her hair. “I was running away.”

  “From what?”

  “From whom would be the better question.” Jesse paused for so long, she wasn’t sure he would answer.

  “All my life my father tried to fit me into a mold that wasn’t right for me. He wanted me to be a banker just like him and his father before him. Money and status are the two things that matter most to him. We always attended the right functions, with the right people, and wore the right clothes. My parents are well respected.”

  “Didn’t you like banking?”

  Jesse shrugged. “I have a different view of life and wealth than my parents or my sisters. Besides, I like being outdoors too much to be cooped up in a building all the time.”

  “Tell me about your sisters.” Megan twisted to look up at him.

  “They’re both older than me. They married the right men. My father picked them out. Amanda and Patricia both attend the right church and do everything the way Father expected them to. They’re perfect—to him.”

  “He picked out their husbands?” Megan straightened, alarm racing through her. “What about you? Was it Sara?”

  Jesse’s brow furrowed. “How did you know about Sara?”

  “You talked a lot when you were sick. You thought I was Sara.” Megan felt heat creeping up her neck to her face. Maybe she shouldn’t have said anything.

  Sadness settled over Jesse. “Yes, he had Sara picked out several years ago. She was from a family that would be an excellent match, increasing our wealth and holdings.” His eyes darkened as if he were begging Megan to understand. “I couldn’t marry her. I couldn’t spend my life living a lie.” He flicked the reins to urge the horses on. “You see, Someone else had a call on my life.”

  Taking his arm from her shoulders, Jesse wrapped his fingers around Megan’s hand, bringing it to his lips for a brief kiss. “I was never like my family. I hated church.”

  She gave him a startled look. “You hated church?” Megan couldn’t help thinking how she dreaded ever going to church again. She’d struggled with separating her feelings about church from her feelings about God.

  “The church my family attends is about show. You wear the proper clothes and sit in the designated pew for your status. It’s like everything is orchestrated for the congregation’s benefit and nothing is there for God.” Jesse flicked the reins again. “I didn’t realize that until I met Pastor Phillips.”

  “Who’s Pastor Phillips?”

  Jesse grinned. “You have to remember you’re married to a black sheep. I tended to disappear any chance I got. I’m not sure how it happened, but I found myself in a poorer section of town one day. In looking back, I know God guided me there so I could meet Pastor Phillips.” He chuckled. “You would never have guessed the man was a pastor. He was playing a game with some of the neighborhood kids. Even though I dressed differently, they invited me to join them. That was the most fun I’d had in my life.

  “From that time on, every chance I got, I slipped off to Pastor Phillips’s church. He’s the one who taught me who Jesus really is. I had no idea there was more to religion than wearing your best clothes to church once a week.”

  “Did your parents get angry when they found out where you were going?”

  Jesse groaned. “Angry doesn’t describe them. By the time they found out about Pastor Phillips, I already accepted the call to become a preacher. My father stopped those ideas fast. He even hired a man to follow me to make sure I didn’t run with unsavory characters anymore.” Jesse stared off into the distance, lost in thought. “He couldn’t stop my thoughts, though. I did that all by myself.”

  “What do you mean?”

  He sighed. “I bent to my father’s will rather than following God’s call.”

  “You were so young to go against your parents, though.” Megan wanted to hug away the hurt she could see in his eyes.

  “That’s no excuse. Look at all the young men in the Bible who gave up everything to follow God’s call: Samuel, David, many of the prophets, the disciples. I was more like Jonah. I ran from what God wanted me to do, and I knew I was running.”

  Seana moaned. Megan leaned over the seat and placed her fingers on her sister’s forehead. Seana quieted. Megan sat back up to find Jesse studying her. She blushed, as thoughts of kissing him again rampaged through her. “Was. . .was banking so awful?”

  Jesse gave her a wry smile. “Yes. I hated being cooped up inside that stuffy old bui
lding. I loved taking care of the animals and helping the gardener with the plants and grounds.” He gazed around at the land spread out before them. “I think God used my willfulness to bring me here. I’m so excited about doing farming as soon as the weather warms up. I found some seed your father had stored in the barn. I thought I’d ride in and buy some more next week so we’ll be sure to have enough.” He paused.

  “I don’t know a whole lot about farming. Maybe I’ll visit with William Bright and see if he can give me some advice.”

  “He could help a lot.” Megan tried to keep the bitterness from her voice as her fears rose up in a suffocating cloud. “The problem is, why should we go to the trouble to plant the fields when we won’t have a farm after June? I don’t think we should do Mr. Sparks any favors. He won’t take care of the crops.”

  ❧

  “Meggie, oww!” Seana began to cry.

  Jesse halted the team and grabbed Megan’s arm to steady her as she climbed into the wagon bed with Seana. Seana’s eyes were wide with fear and pain. She held her body very still, as if simple movements hurt too much to do. Jesse hated the thought of starting the wagon moving, knowing the motion would bring discomfort to the child.

  He waited until Megan was settled with Seana’s head on her lap. She spoke softly to her sister, calming her down. After a few minutes, Megan looked up at Jesse and nodded. He turned away with the image of her fear and hurt evident in the look she’d given him. More than anything, he wanted to erase those worries; he wanted to see her smile and laugh.

  The wagon jounced down the rutted track leading to their farm. No matter which way Jesse guided the team, he could still feel every bump in the road and imagine how those felt like jolts of pain to Seana. With Megan beside her, the young girl was putting up a brave front. She hadn’t cried out once since they started off again.

  A few minutes later, Seana slept. Megan didn’t want to leave her, so they rode in silence. Megan’s words came back to Jesse. What about the bank taking back the farm in June? What could he do about that? He had some ideas, and he thought now would be the time to act on them. He’d tried hard to think of some reason Megan’s father would have such a large outstanding loan due at an awkward time, but he couldn’t come up with anything. He mulled over the information William Bright shared with him and what he knew of banking practices, but nothing made any sense. A gnawing unease deep inside told him something wasn’t right here.

  He’d gone through Megan’s father’s papers time and again looking for something about the loan. The only bank papers he’d found showed the loan Mr. Riley took out for seed and equipment three years ago, but there was also documentation that it had been paid off. Had he taken out another loan and not kept the paperwork? That didn’t seem to fit with the little he knew about Lee Riley. The man had kept careful records of everything, from what he planted to how the crops produced, valuable information for Jesse or anyone who followed his example. He had a book about the animals and their offspring. Jesse didn’t think very many farmers kept track of things like that, so why did Lee Riley not have anything about a loan that meant he would lose the farm he loved if he didn’t pay it off?

  The sun was sinking low by the time Jesse drew to a stop in front of the house. His muscles ached as he climbed down. Megan looked as tired as he felt. As his hands circled her waist, he recalled their kisses earlier this afternoon. If only Seana weren’t watching them, he would be tempted to steal a few more of those kisses. Megan had no idea how desirable she was, but he intended to show her. He couldn’t believe how much he’d grown to love her in the short time he’d known her. She’d become like a precious jewel to him, something of great value that he didn’t want to lose.

  Fourteen

  Stepping out of the bedroom, Megan arched her back to ease the ache of weariness. Seana finally slept. Megan didn’t know how long this would last. The medicine Doc had given them had lessened the pain enough for sleep to claim her sister.

  If only she could take some of the medicine herself. Megan shook her head. The ache inside her was completely different. She knew she would have trouble sleeping tonight because of Jesse and the longing he’d awakened in her. Her cheeks warmed as she recalled his kisses this afternoon. She hadn’t wanted him to stop. The way he looked at her, as if she were the most delectable sweet he’d ever seen, made her heart pound and her insides tremble.

  Lord, I’ve fallen in love with him. Is this what You intended when You brought him here? Megan thought back to those first days when she cared for Jesse while he was so sick. Had she even been falling in love with him then? Is that why she hadn’t fought marrying him as much as she could have? She knew deep in her heart that she wouldn’t have agreed to marry Mr. Sparks that easily. Jesus, help me to be a good wife to Jesse. Help me encourage him in the calling You’ve given him.

  A slight movement across the room drew her attention. Jesse squatted in front of the fire. Megan’s breath caught in her throat. The firelight flickered and moved like a caress over the planes of Jesse’s face, highlighting his toffee-colored hair. His strong hands were still, his eyes staring into the flames as if he were a million miles away. Was he thinking about the girl he didn’t marry? Did he have regrets about Sara? Megan didn’t want to consider that. She wanted to trust what she’d seen in Jesse’s gaze today.

  Although she didn’t think she’d made a sound, Jesse turned and smiled at her. Megan thought she might melt.

  “Would you like me to get you some coffee?” She almost groaned. What a stupid thing to ask. Who would want coffee this late? In fact, why was Jesse still up? He usually went to bed early. She thought he might still be worn down from his bout with pneumonia, but he wouldn’t admit to it.

  Jesse straightened and brushed at some wood chips on his pants. “I think a glass of warm milk might be better.”

  “Do you want me to throw it on the fire for you?” Megan slapped her hand over her mouth. She couldn’t believe she’d said that.

  Tipping his head back, Jesse laughed harder than she’d ever seen him laugh. She couldn’t help it, she had to join in. Crossing to the kitchen, Megan hoped their mirth wouldn’t wake up Seana.

  “I think this fire should stay lit.” Jesse gasped, his eyes twinkling. Still chuckling, he strode across the room to join Megan. “I’m glad you can laugh. I was so afraid you’d be beaten down by all that’s happened. You’re a strong woman, Megan Coulter.”

  “I only do what I need to do.” Megan tried to ignore the rush of excitement that shot through her at his approach.

  “I know what I see.” Jesse took another step closer. “You’re always polite, but you don’t give an inch to anything that’s wrong. Remember when the reverend tried to make you marry Mr. Sparks?” He grinned. “I think if I hadn’t stepped in, Sparks would have been flying—right out the door.”

  Megan felt her lips twitching. She’d always enjoyed this sort of repartee with her parents, but she’d never been comfortable enough with anyone else to let go and be herself. She chuckled. “Now that would have been a sight to see.”

  Jesse took another step. She could almost feel the warmth of his arms as she imagined them around her again. Megan gestured at the stove. “Do you still want some warm milk?” After studying her for a long moment, Jesse nodded.

  Within a few minutes, they were seated across the table from each other, sipping the warm drink. Megan had added a little sugar and cinnamon.

  “Mmm. This is delicious. What kind of cow gives milk like this?” Jesse’s eyes crinkled.

  “This is my mother’s recipe. We do have sweet grass around here, but nothing with these spices.” She met his gaze, then looked away. He made her feel things she’d never felt before. “None of us liked warm milk, so on nights when we couldn’t sleep, Momma fixed it this way so we would drink it.”

  “Did it help you sleep?”

  Megan chuckled. “I think sometimes we worked at staying awake just so we could get a sweet treat. Momma and Papa probably k
new what we were doing, but they still spoiled us. A lot of parents would have used a switch instead.” Megan ran her finger around the rim of her cup. “I hope if I ever have children, I can be half as good a parent.”

  She jumped as Jesse’s warm hand covered hers. “You’ll be the best. Look at the way you are with Seana. Anyone who can get along with her sister like you do will make a great mother.”

  Megan leaned across the table and spoke in a low whisper. “You just haven’t seen the times I pinch her when you’re not looking.”

  Jesse grinned. “I may not see them, but I would have heard.”

  They laughed and Megan straightened. She wondered if she should pull her hand out from under Jesse’s and decided not to. His touch felt so right. She wanted more. They should be getting sleep so they’d be ready for tomorrow, but neither one of them seemed eager to end this time together.

  Jesse cleared his throat. “Tomorrow I’ll ride over to the Brights’.”

  “That’s fine.” Megan nodded. “You said you wanted to talk to him about planting. It’ll be time soon.”

  Their conversation wasn’t comfortable now, but stilted. The warmth of Jesse’s hand covering hers had grown to something more. Megan found herself wishing the table wasn’t between them. She wanted him to hold her.

  “Do you think Seana will be okay for the night?” Jesse’s soft question startled her. His voice sounded funny, almost strained.

  Megan nodded. She didn’t trust herself to speak. Her mouth felt dry. Jesse stood, never letting go of her hand. He rounded the table, and Megan, too, rose. At his slight tug, she moved toward him as if in a dream. The look of love in his eyes surrounded her, taking away thoughts of anything but her husband.

  When he kissed her this time, Megan felt like a princess. She’d given Jesse the opportunity to leave and he hadn’t wanted to. He loved her—something she never thought a man would do. She loved him, too, with a deep aching love that she’d never known would be a possibility.