Truly Yours Historical Collection December 2014

by Susan Page Davis, Paige Winship Dooly, Connie Stevens

  “Because he came here the day they died. It’s his fault.”

  Megan hugged her sister close, aching inside for the loss that was just now catching up to the young girl. She’d had trouble dealing with this, too, but all along she’d assumed Seana was too young to understand death. Her assumption that Seana would go right on despite missing their parents and brother had been wrong. What should she do now?

  “Jesse was lost in the storm. He nearly died before I found him. How could he have done any harm to our family?”

  “I don’t know, but he did.” Seana shook with sobs. Megan began to rock her, hoping to ease the girl’s pain.

  “Seana, you’re looking for someone to blame for their deaths, but there isn’t anyone. Sometimes things like this happen. Death can come to us all—it will, in fact. We have to be ready to accept that even when it hurts.”

  “I want them back.” Seana pushed free. “You have to say those things because you married Jesse.”

  Weariness settled over Megan. She didn’t know what to do. She had no idea what Momma and Papa would have done. “I have to fix supper. You stay in here. Take off those muddy shoes. Think about what you’ve said. Jesse has done nothing but be kind to us since he’s been here. He doesn’t deserve your nastiness.”

  Megan’s legs trembled as she walked from the room. Her stomach tensed with the feeling that she’d failed her parents when they left her in charge. Her earlier question to Seana now haunted her. What would her parents say about how she was doing?

  She didn’t hear anything from Seana as she prepared the fish for cooking. By the time Jesse came through the door, the smell of supper permeated the air. Megan’s stomach rumbled. They hadn’t had fresh trout in months.

  “Oh, that smells so good.” Jesse drew in a deep breath, his face split in a wide grin. After hanging his hat on a hook near the door, he clumped into the kitchen and swept Megan into his arms. She couldn’t get over how affectionate her husband was. She loved the attention he lavished on her. Whenever she approached him, he gave her his immediate consideration, no matter what else he was doing.

  “How’s the most beautiful girl in a hundred miles?” Jesse nuzzled her neck, sweeping kisses up to her cheek.

  “You are going to be eating burned fish if you keep this up.” Megan tried to sound fierce, but her giggles spoiled the effect.

  “I’ll catch more,” Jesse murmured against her ear. “You taste better than any old fish, anyway.”

  “Jesse.” Megan slapped at his shoulder. He grinned and landed a kiss on her lips. She quit fighting, even if she hadn’t been protesting in earnest. His kisses were so sweet. She couldn’t seem to get enough.

  “Stop that. You’re killing her, too.” Seana’s scream from across the room jerked Megan and Jesse apart. Megan blinked and stared at her sister, whose face had turned red with rage.

  “Seana, we were kissing.”

  “No, he was gonna kill you like he did them.”

  Anger coursed through Megan. “Jesse did not kill anyone, Seana. You’ve seen Momma and Papa kissing like that. What’s wrong with you?”

  “I hate him.” Seana clutched her doll tight to her chest. Her eyes shone bright with unshed tears. She looked like a forlorn waif, but her emotions were coming out as hatred toward Jesse. Megan knew they couldn’t allow that to continue.

  “Seana, that’s enough. I want you to apologize to Jesse.”

  “I won’t.”

  “Do you remember what Momma would do when you behaved like this?”

  Seana stared at her for a moment. The fight seemed to trickle out of her until she hung her head. “She whipped me with a switch.”

  “That’s right.” Megan’s heart was breaking as she tried to remain firm. “Jesse is my husband, your brother-in-law. I was wrong earlier when I told you I was in charge. Jesse is the one in charge here, just like Papa was the head of the house before.” Megan waited a moment to let that sink in. “You will treat Jesse with respect.”

  Her tone softened. “I know you’re missing our family. I am, too. But you can’t blame Jesse for something he didn’t do. All right?”

  “Yes.” Seana’s braids shivered as she nodded her head.

  “Now get ready for supper.” Megan forced a light tone, hoping to ease the tension. “The fish you caught are almost ready for you to eat them.”

  Seana shuffled back to her room to put up her doll. Megan could see the glint of moisture in Jesse’s eyes. He looked so gruff sometimes because of his size, but he had a tender heart.

  “She wants me to leave.” Jesse’s voice told the hurt he felt. He tried to smile, but failed. “At the creek she told me you don’t want me to stay anymore.”

  Sixteen

  The evening air carried a chill, making Megan glad she’d brought a shawl with her when Jesse suggested they take a walk. Her whole body cried out with exhaustion from the tension of the evening. Seana had calmed down, but they all still felt her rejection of Jesse. Now her sister slept, and Jesse walked silently by Megan’s side. She could almost feel his hurt and frustration.

  “I’m so sorry about what Seana said.”

  Jesse squeezed her hand. “She’s a child. I’m sure she’ll be okay in time.” They walked in silence for a few minutes.

  “I should have seen this coming.” Megan fought to speak around the lump in her throat. “She cried when my parents and Matt were gone, but it’s slowly sinking into her that they’re gone for good. She always did want Momma to hold her for hours when she was sick.”

  Stars twinkled across the expanse of the sky. On the horizon, the moon was just peeking above the hills. Megan felt choked by the responsibility weighing down on her. She felt guilty over her anger at her parents for leaving her with this mess. What kind of daughter was she to feel this way?

  “I don’t know what to do.” The words came out on a sob.

  Jesse halted, pulling her close. “Seana’s gone through a lot, Megan. Give her time. She’s also a Christian now. You can use Bible verses to guide her. I’ll be there to help, but she already resents me. I don’t want to turn her away completely.”

  Her head rested against his broad chest, and she closed her eyes. The steady beat of his heart calmed her. “You’re better than warm milk.”

  “What?” Jesse tipped her head back and smiled down at her.

  Megan could feel the heat warming her face. “I meant. . . when you hold me.” She struggled to find the right words. “When you hold me like this, I forget all about my troubles. You make me relax. I feel so content.”

  He chuckled and let her lean against him again. “I could say the same for you. You know, I really thought I’d never get married, but now I can’t imagine life without you.” The kiss that followed stole her breath. The next one made her forget everything.

  Jesse broke the kiss and stepped back, his breathing ragged. He caught hold of her hand. “I brought you out here to talk. If we don’t start walking again, I’m going to forget what I had to say and just suggest we return to the house.” He paused, then stepped closer. “Come to think of it, maybe we can talk tomorrow.”

  “Oh, no you don’t.” Megan gave a breathless laugh and swatted at him. “You can’t tell me you have something important to talk about, then put it off. I won’t be able to sleep.”

  “Maybe I was just wanting to get you out here where we could be alone.”

  Megan tilted her head and tried to hide a smile. “That won’t work. We were alone in the house, since Seana sleeps like a bear in hibernation.”

  “Perhaps I wanted to be romantic.” Jesse gestured up at the millions of stars. He drew her close and lowered his lips toward hers.

  “Won’t work.” As she murmured the words, she sighed with longing. She didn’t know if she wanted to continue with this intimacy or hear what he had to say.

  “You’re right.” Jesse held her tight for a few minutes. “I need to talk to you about this.”

  Megan waited, content to remain in his em
brace forever. She couldn’t imagine what would be so important. They’d already discussed Seana, the plowing was underway, and Jesse had visited with William Bright a couple of times for advice on managing the farm.

  He cleared his throat. Stepping back, he took her hand and began to walk. “The other day when I was at the Brights’, William and I got into a discussion about church and religion.”

  Megan tensed, but remained silent, waiting to see what Jesse had to say.

  “William and Edith haven’t been back to church since the last day we were there. Reverend Porter did come to visit them.” Jesse squeezed her hand as she tried to pull away. He wouldn’t let go.

  “Porter spouted some religious jargon, trying to convince them that he was in the right that day. They didn’t fall for it. In fact, William told Porter to leave and never come back when he started telling them all the rumors about your reputation being sullied.”

  Anger made Megan feel taut as a strung bow. She wanted to say something in her defense, but knew there was nothing to say. Her hand began to ache, and she realized how tightly she had gripped Jesse’s fingers. She made herself relax the hold she had on him.

  “I didn’t say this to make you mad or to bring up hurtful things.” Jesse sounded anxious that she understand. Looking up into his dark eyes, Megan attempted a smile, but failed.

  “William and Edith both miss the fellowship with other believers.”

  “Then they need to go back to church. They shouldn’t stay away on my account.”

  “They aren’t, Angel.” Jesse embraced her. “William says they won’t go back to a church where the reverend spreads gossip and treats the parishioners like you were treated.”

  “There aren’t any other churches close enough to attend.” Megan thought about how much she missed church functions. Even though she didn’t care to be around people a lot, she still liked hearing the Word of God preached to a group of believers and nonbelievers. She wanted to feel a part of God’s family.

  Jesse took a deep breath. “That’s what I wanted to talk to you about. We’ve discussed the idea of starting a church a few times, but haven’t done anything yet.” He hesitated as if gathering his thoughts. “I invited the Brights to come over on Sunday and worship with us.” He stopped, turning her to face him. Megan had to fight a smile at the hopeful look he gave her. He reminded her of Matt as a little boy, begging to do something he wasn’t sure would be allowed.

  “That is the best idea I’ve heard in a long time.” Megan’s excitement began to grow. “Edith will probably bring something, and we can share a meal after the service. I can’t wait.” She hugged Jesse. “I don’t know why you were so worried. The Brights are good friends. We don’t get to see each other often. I’m always happy to have them visit, and worshiping together will be even better.”

  Pushing her back a step, Jesse took hold of her hands. “That’s not quite all.” She quieted as he paused. “William wants to invite some of the others who live within traveling distance of our place. Most of them live too far to get to Yankton, but they could come here on a Sunday.”

  Fear gripped Megan. She closed her eyes. Having close friends over to worship with was one thing. Having a crowd was another. Who knew what someone might have heard? Then more rumors would be spread, and she would be the target of those looks and comments that hurt more than any physical pain she’d ever experienced.

  “Megan, look at me.” He waited until she opened her eyes. “You have nothing to be ashamed of. There are always people who will gossip. That’s why gossip is mentioned right alongside of murder in the Bible.” He pulled her into his embrace. “Don’t let your fears hinder what we should do for Jesus. I’ve promised Him to serve wherever and however He wants. I thought that meant going somewhere far away.” She leaned back to gaze up at him. He kissed her and gave her a reassuring smile. “Now I understand He wants me right here. That’s one of the reasons I’m here, or God is using me here, despite my willfulness. There’s a need for a church and I’d like to start one. Will you help me?”

  Megan leaned her forehead against Jesse’s chest. He was so strong and sturdy and tender. She loved him so much. Could she stand with him? Would God give her the strength and courage to do so?

  For the first time, Megan realized how much she depended on her parents’ faith. Although she’d always believed, she never had to stand on her own before. She could almost feel God ask, “Whom will you serve this day?” Lifting her head, she met Jesse’s gaze as tears filled her eyes.

  “Whatever God wants you to do, I’ll be right there.”

  “Thank you.” Jesse whispered the words as he leaned close for a long kiss. By the time the kiss ended, they were both breathless again. “Now, I think it’s time for the two of us to go back home, don’t you?” His eyes twinkled with love and excitement. Megan knew her eyes must reflect those same feelings.

  ❧

  The yard held a scattering of makeshift tables on one side. The other side was lined with benches waiting for the neighbors to arrive for their first church service. Jesse yanked at the collar of his shirt and tried to pray harder. He’d never led a complete service before, although he’d helped Pastor Phillips several times. Megan assured him the people would love his preaching, but he still had the tingling of nerves letting him know he was depending too much on himself and not enough on God.

  A wagon rattled into sight. William and Edith waved, their boys and Sally jumping down almost before the wagon had a chance to stop. Seana, delighted at the chance to spend the day with her friend, dashed from the house. Every day, Seana made several trips to the barn to see if Shadow or Mama Kitty had their babies yet. Now she grabbed Sally’s hand and dragged her in that direction, most likely hoping to have kittens to show her.

  “Mornin’, William.” Jesse greeted the man he’d come to think of as a friend. William was steady, a hard worker, and willing to give advice, not ridicule, to a newcomer.

  “Mornin’, Jesse.” William took the baby and helped Edith to the ground. “There are two more wagons behind us. I think it’s Harry Price and Joseph Martin, with their families. Caleb Duncan promised they’d come, too.” William gave a slow grin. “With their fourteen young ’uns, they’ll about fill up the benches.”

  Jesse shook his head. Fourteen. That was a passel of children, for sure. “Once we have the service, we can take the benches to the tables while the women set out the food.” Jesse slapped William on the back. “Thanks for all the help yesterday. I couldn’t have gotten ready without you.”

  William studied the makeshift tables and benches thrown together from scraps. Jesse knew he was thinking of the work they’d put in, when William showed up unexpectedly with a wagon full of scrap lumber, a hammer, and some nails. He wanted this church to work out as much as Jesse did.

  “I’ve been praying for years that God would send us someone who could preach a good Bible-based message and who would be willing to meet with folks who couldn’t make the drive to Yankton.” William stared off in the distance, not meeting Jesse’s gaze. “You’re an answer to prayer.”

  “I don’t know. You haven’t heard me preach yet.” He watched as another wagon came into view.

  William turned and lowered his voice, although no one else was near. “Before the others arrive, I wanted to ask if you’d heard anything back from the letters you sent.”

  “I haven’t been to town to check the mail. I should be going this week sometime to get supplies. If I hear anything, I’ll be over and let you know.” Jesse stepped forward with William to greet the new family driving into the yard. He hadn’t told Megan that Mr. Sparks had stopped by William’s place, offering to buy it from him. Sparks told William if he didn’t sell, they would be neighbors soon when he took over the Riley place. The man refused to think of it as the Coulter place. He wouldn’t even acknowledge Jesse when they passed on the street in Yankton.

  Another wagon clattered to a stop. Jesse busied himself unhitching horses and directing t
he older boys to where the stock could be watered and penned up for the day. Women called greetings to one another as they herded toddlers and carried food to the house. The older children squealed in delight as they played a game of tag to pass the time until everyone arrived. The peace and quiet that usually filled Jesse’s day turned to chaos, but he didn’t mind a bit. The Holy Spirit had given him a message for these people, and now that the time had come, he couldn’t wait to share God’s Word with them. As he watched the chatter and joy these people who lived in isolation exhibited as they met with one another, Jesse felt a welling up of love and compassion. For the first time, he began to understand what Pastor Phillips meant when he talked about loving his flock. With God’s help, these people would become Jesse’s flock of believers.

  In no time the horses were cared for, the food put in the house, the children gathered, and everyone seated on the rough benches, waiting for Jesse to begin. He looked out at their eager, expectant faces and thrilled to the work God had prepared for him to do.

  “Good morning. Thank you all for coming.” Jesse cleared his throat and glanced at Megan. He’d been afraid she would be uncomfortable with the gathering, but with Edith arriving first, Megan had relaxed and seemed to be enjoying the company.

  “Pastor Dan Phillips taught me most of what I know of the Bible. I enjoyed many of his services and would like to pattern this one after some of his.” He grinned. “That means I’d like to start off with some singing, and I’m looking for one of the men here to volunteer to lead the songs.”

  The men glanced at one another from the corners of their eyes, looking as if they’d rather be a hundred miles away than here. Jesse had no idea who to call on because he didn’t know anyone other than William well enough to elect them. William admittedly had trouble carrying a tune in a bucket.

  “Caleb’s oldest boy, Samuel, has a fine voice. I’ve heard him singing in the fields.” William pointed to the boy in question. The youth’s face turned bright pink, and he ducked his head.

  “Samuel.” Jesse waited until the boy looked up at him. His bright eyes held a mixture of longing and embarrassment. “Would you like to come and help me with the singing this first time? Then, if you like, you can take over the other Sundays.”