Solving Us

by Susan Renee

  “God, you’re white as a ghost. Just drink, Liv. Small sips,” he says, watching me inhale the water like it’s the elixir of life. The coolness of the water does make me feel better. I pour some onto my hands and wipe my face and neck.

  “I live around the corner and was just getting back from a short run myself when I saw you sprinting down the road. Damn girl, you can run, but why the hell were you sprinting in this heat? Do you always work out like that? No steady pace, or do you always like it fast and hard?” he asks, raising an eyebrow and smirking at his own humor.

  I roll my eyes at his innuendo. “No, I don’t usually work out like that. Just a bad afternoon and I needed to let go of some stress. That’s all. I’m fine.”

  “Shit. You most certainly are not fine, Olivia. You’re damn lucky you didn’t break a leg running and falling like that...and even luckier that you didn’t give yourself a heart attack or something. Have you had anything to drink today? It’s well over ninety degrees out here this afternoon, and with this humidity...”

  “No, I’m the idiot who forgot to drink her water before running. Sorry. I thought I could make it back. Obviously, I should’ve walked.” I can feel my attitude heading south quickly.

  “Obviously.” Austin takes a deep breath picking up on my mood and stands watching me as I empty the water bottle. “Let me get you back safely. You shouldn’t walk on that leg right now. You’ll just make it bleed more.”

  “I’ll be fine. Thanks for your help.”

  Austin crouches down and picks me up with ease. “Where do you live?”

  “Austin Rivers put me DOWN! I can walk just fine!”

  He glares at me, and I know there’s no way I’m going to win this one. I swallow hard and wince slightly at the pain in my knee.

  “Morgan Estates, but really, Riv, it’s not far from here, I can walk it. You can put me down.”

  “Shut up and let me be a gentleman for a few minutes, all right? Seriously, that knee is going to be sore for a few days. Let’s let it stop bleeding, so you don’t leave a trail all the way home.”

  Austin is easily as fit as Finn. He is strong enough to handle me with ease, but he just isn’t as comfortable as Finn. Austin Rivers is more the biker type than the fancy car or sail boat owning type. If someone asked me to describe him, I would have to say he’s a little bit country and a little bit rock and roll. His brown hair is usually buzzed pretty short, but right now, it’s hiding under a ball cap, which in all honesty, boosts his sex appeal up a few notches. He sports an earring in each ear as well as a short beard and goatee, which I also find very sexy about him in that bad boy sort of way; but I don’t think now is exactly the time to tell him this secret, so I keep it to myself.

  “So, ya want to tell me what got your feathers all ruffled at the end of the day?” he asks as we were walking through the park next to my apartment building. Thank God we aren’t walking down the sidewalk. I can only imagine the stares and car honks we would be getting right now.

  “No...it’s nothing. I don’t really want to talk about it. I’ll be fine. It just sucks when a totally perfect day goes sour right before you walk out the door. I wasn’t prepared for it, and it pissed me off.”

  “Hmm. Been there. Well look, I know we all joke around and have a good time when we can, but don’t sweat the small stuff. We’re all willing to help out when things get stressful which happens sometimes especially with dickish clients…or bitchy bosses.”

  Austin winks at me as if he totally understands what my issue is and that I don’t want to say it out loud.

  “Yeah. Thanks. I’ll remember that.”

  We make it to my apartment quicker than I expect, and Austin carries me into the elevator before putting me down. He helps me as I limp down the hall to my apartment and open the door. We both step inside and are met with two worried stares.

  “Olivia!” Finn drops his phone onto the counter and runs over to me, sweeping me off my feet and into his arms.

  “Liv, what the hell? What happened to you? You look like death!” Abby says.

  “Thanks, Abby; you definitely know how to make a girl feel great.” I roll my eyes but smirk at her, letting her know I’m joking. Well, okay I’m half joking, but whatever.

  “She’s fine,” Austin speaks up. Finn and Abby turn their heads noticing him for the first time, as if he wasn’t the one who walked into the apartment next to me. “I was out jogging when I saw Olivia sprinting down the road covered in sweat. She looked like she was about to pass out, and I just couldn’t get to her fast enough before she fell.”

  “Oh my God, Olivia, you fainted?” Abby asks shocked.

  “Yeah, it’s my fault. I’m dehydrated, and I ran too hard. That’s all. I’m fine. Really. It’s just a skinned knee.” I’m beginning to get annoyed with all the attention. I really just wanted to take a shower and relax.

  Finn carries me over to the barstools at the breakfast bar and sits me down. Abby is already following with the first aid kit and a wet washcloth. Finn rips off the remaining shreds of the right side of my pants and wipes up the blood that has dried on my leg, before tending to the open wound on my knee. The feel of the water burns, or maybe it’s just the pressure from Finn’s hand. Either way, I flinch and try to pull my leg away, but Finn has a firm hold on my shin.

  “Guys, I’m not a six-year-old. It’s just a scrape. I can handle it. Okay?”

  “Hey,” Finn says softly looking me in the eye. He can sense my frustration. “Just let me look at it so I can make sure it’s okay.” I sigh heavily and nod at Finn. I lean back, resting my elbows on the countertop behind me but immediately wince when my right elbow hits the countertop.

  “What?” Finn asks alarmed. “Did I hurt you?”

  “No.” I sit up and turn my right arm over to see what the damage is to my elbow.

  “Damnit.” There’s blood oozing slowly from a scrape right near my funny bone, which clearly isn’t funny, but I chuckle anyway.

  “What’s so funny?” Abby is scowling at me from beside Finn.

  “This is. It’s ridiculous really. I mean, I don’t know what there is to get so upset about. What’s one more scar on an already ripped up body?”

  “Olivia…” Finn eyes me cautiously.

  “What, Finn?” I look at him, and then to Abby, and then back to Finn trying to figure out what they are both thinking as they both stand there staring at me with concerned looks in their eyes.

  “Ooooh. I get it. You guys think I’m going to have a flashback, huh? Poor Olivia gets trampled by her dog in a bear fight and lives with ugly fucking scars, and now you’re waiting for me to freak out? Is that it?”

  “Olivia, that’s enough!” shouts Finn in disbelief.

  “I AM NOT A CHILD, FINN! I had a shitty afternoon, and I tried to run off my stress, but I overdid it and fainted. That’s it! No big deal! I’m over it!”

  “Uhh,I’m gonna go.” I hear from across the room. Austin is standing in the doorway, wide eyed and speechless. As this was the first time he had ever seen me outside of work, I feel guilty having just screamed at my friends, one of them being his boss, in front of him.

  “Riv, I’m…” I sigh heavily. “Thank you for helping me. I really do appreciate it.”

  “No problem, Olivia. I’ll, uh, see you tomorrow,” he says, backing out of the door, closing it behind him but not before I see him eye my roommate from head to toe.

  Yes, Rivers, we all know she’s a knock-out.

  I stand up for a moment, looking at the floor trying to decide what to say next, but what I really want is to be alone.

  “I’m going to take a shower.”

  “Olivia,” Finn starts.

  “SHOWER!” I shout slamming the bathroom door behind me. I immediately turn on the water and then turn to examine my face in the mirror. I can feel my breakdown coming; the tension in my body is almost unbearable. I want to scream and cry big ugly tears at the hot mess that was my afternoon, but I want to do it in private s
o I don’t have to explain it to anyone. Sometimes a girl just needs to cry a pissed off, angry, ugly cry and scream into her towel until she can’t scream anymore.

  I slowly peel off my sweat-soaked tank top and what’s left of my running pants, letting them fall in a heavy heap to the floor. Bending my arm to peel off my sports bra proves to be a challenge, and I can definitely tell that I’ll be pretty sore in the morning, or in about fifteen minutes.

  I step into the shower and stand under the cool water. I imagine myself standing under a refreshing waterfall, showering myself in the cleansing waters, but even that doesn’t keep the tears at bay. As I wash my face, I can feel the warm wetness spilling from my eyes. I don’t know how all this shit happened, or what I’m really going to do about it; but at this very moment, standing in my shower, I want to punch Karen in the face. I want to punch her for being such a bitch to me this afternoon! I want to punch her for messing up my perfect work day and for causing me to stand here crying my eyes out! I want to punch her for stealing my client. Her attitude was one I had never seen from her before, and I really don’t understand what I could’ve done to deserve it. And what’s worse is that there is no way I’m going to be able to tell Finn about it. Karen is like a second mother to him. I’ll either sound like I’m a cry baby, or I’ll cause tension in his family, and neither option sounds like fun.

  Abby knocks lightly and then enters the bathroom as I’m finishing up my shower. “Olivia? Babe, what is going on?”

  Why didn’t I lock the door?

  “Let me guess...Finn sent you in here because he thinks I won’t scream at you?”

  “Uh, no. Chillax there, Hot Stuff, he went to get us some dinner. He said we shouldn’t worry about cooking tonight and knew you needed a minute, so he went to get Chinese. I reminded him to get an extra egg roll for you.”

  “Oh. Thanks.”

  Open mouth, insert foot.

  “So, talk to me. You’re usually not like this, so I know something had to have happened at work. I also know if you wanted to talk about it around Finn, you would have immediately; so you’re welcome for sending him out for a bit. He won’t be gone long, though, so start talking.”

  I turn off the water and grab my towel hanging over the shower curtain rod and wipe off my face and neck. “Karen Elena stole my client.”

  “She what?”

  “She fucking STOLE my client, Abby. I mean literally...the Boston Cruise Line account? Yeah, while I was working in California, she just decided to take it upon herself to come up with a design, sent it off to the cruise line for approval, which she got by the way, and didn’t think to tell me about it! So, who do you think looked like a fucking idiot when she had to call and talk to someone there after receiving the approval email today?”

  “Whoa…” Abby says in disbelief.

  “Abs, she told them I was sick and hadn’t been into work! She lied to them!” I continue to recount my story and conversation with Karen to Abby, filling in all the gaps as she asked for details. Talking about it again certainly isn’t calming me down.

  “Olivia, you have to tell Finn.”

  “Do I? I mean, as far as I see it, there’s no way I can tell him! I told Karen that I don’t run to him because I want to keep our relationship separate, which she clearly doesn’t believe based on her bitchy reply and the rolling of her eyes; but, whatever, I mean…who does that? What did I do to her? She wasn’t like this before I left town!”

  “Okay, take a deep breath. You’re getting yourself all worked up, and that shower was supposed to calm you down,” Abby says from the other side of the curtain. I wrap my towel around me and pull open the shower curtain to find Abby sitting Indian style against the bathroom door. She had a pensive look to her, as though she was trying to solve the world’s trickiest mathematical equation.

  “Liv, you don’t think she could’ve sent those emails,” she looks up at me, her eyes round and bright. “Do you?”

  “NO,” I say immediately before stopping in my tracks as her words hit me in the face. “Maybe. No. I don’t know. After this afternoon, I suppose anything is possible, but what I don’t understand is why Abby? What reason would she have to treat me like this?”

  “Jealousy?”

  “Jealousy? Jealousy over what? Finn? Ew, he’s like a son to her!”

  “Do you think Mandy knows? Seems like she would know it happened since she was there while you weren’t.” Abby scowls and then gasps as her eyes brighten like a lightbulb just went off in her head.

  “I don’t know. I haven’t talked to Mandy about it yet. She wasn’t there when I found out.”

  “What about Mandy and Finn? Is there a history there?”

  I actually laugh out loud at Abby’s accusation. Obviously, I forgot to tell her more about Mandy. “Uh, I don’t think so...especially since Mandy is gay, Abs. She’s infatuated with this girl from the office who helps her out.”

  “Well anything is possible; don’t count anything out, Liv. If you’re not going to tell Finn about it, and you obviously haven’t told him about the emails yet, then you have to watch your back. Nobody there can look out for you but you. In my short experience, a job is a job, and people will do whatever they can to keep one these days, even if it means hurting other people. Don’t let her bully you, Liv.”

  “She’s my boss, Abs.”

  “Who the hell cares? Nobody deserves to be disrespected. She can dislike you for whatever convoluted reason she’s come up with, but as long as you’re doing your job well, she can’t touch you...not that I think she can get near you with a ten foot pole while you’re with Finn anyway.” Abby smiles and sighs happily. “Aww, Finn is the Dumbledore to your Voldemort, Liv!”

  I roll my eyes at Abby’s comment but chuckle anyway. I know better than to think that Finn can always protect me from having to fight fires at work.

  Especially if I don’t tell him.

  “I’m going to go get dressed. Finn should be back soon.”

  “Hey, “Abby stands up and puts her hands on my shoulders. “I’m here if you need to vent some more, okay? I won’t tell Finn. That’s your business.”

  “Thanks,” I say before walking out of the bathroom and down the hall to my room. I throw on a comfy pair of capris sweats and a t-shirt. My body is beginning to feel stiff from running so hard and then falling. I walk out to the kitchen to grab some Ibuprofen when Finn walks through the door with dinner. His gaze catches my eye, and we stand staring at each other for a second before he looks away to begin emptying the contents of his bags onto the dining room table.

  “Hey,” I say softly.

  “Hey.”

  “Finn listen, I…”

  “I know, Liv. It’s okay”

  “No you don’t know.” I walk over to him and place my hands on his biceps forcing him to look at me. “I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t mean to scream at you. You aren’t to blame for my bad mood, and I shouldn’t have taken it out on you. I’m sorry.”

  “I understand. It’s okay. I don’t mind being that guy once in a while; I just want to know that you’re okay. Can you tell me what happened today that upset you so badly?”

  “No, I can’t.”

  “Why not?” He looks perturbed.

  I sigh and look at Finn, searching for the right words to help me explain my thoughts to him. “Because I can’t run crying and screaming to the big boss man every time something doesn’t go my way just because I’m dating him. That’s not fair to everyone else I work with, and really, it’s not fair to me. I put myself in a potentially problematic situation when I took this job and agreed to date you at the same time. Please don’t make it any more difficult than it already is.”

  “Are you saying I’m difficult for you? Or that I make working at the Kellan Agency difficult?”

  “No, not at all. Neither of those statements is true. I just don’t want everyone I work with to view me as your tattling bitch so nobody can trust me or wants to be around me. Can you understand that
? What happened today threw me for a loop and pissed me off; but it’s nothing I can’t handle. So please allow me the opportunity to handle it myself. You don’t have to be my babysitter...and I mean that in the nicest way.”

  Grinning at my explanation, Finn nods in agreement with my request. “I understand. I don’t want to smother you, Olivia. Just promise me you’ll come to me if things ever start to get out of hand.”

  I reach up on my tip toes and kiss Finn on his cheek. “I promise. Now let’s eat, I’m starving, and then maybe tonight, you can help me forget the bad day I just had.”

  24

  New England in the fall is a spectacular fireworks show of warm-colored crayons bursting all over every tree in town. Yellows, reds, oranges, browns: they’re all there on display as the weather changes to a cooler crisper feel, especially along the waterfront. Late September always gets me in the mood for pumpkin spice lattes and baked apples. Sometimes I like to pretend that I know what I’m doing in the kitchen and spend an entire day baking just to experience the smell of cooked apples in my apartment, or in today’s case, Finn’s apartment. We planned to spend the entire weekend together just relaxing in the fall weather. We ran from his place through the Boston Commons and back this morning and stopped at the marketplace on the way back for everything I needed to make apple crisp and Dutch apple pie, two of my favorites. It’s nice to spend the day relaxing in our sweats together, just being a normal couple. Work is definitely starting to stress me out more than I want it to, so hiding away with Finn for a couple days feels like a nice escape.

  Things at work are changing, and I still can’t understand exactly why. I still love my job and everything I have the opportunity to do; but for whatever reason, I’m no longer one of Karen’s favorite people, and I know it. My work with the Seal Lake Winery was great, and although Karen tried to make my life a living hell by getting involved in my decisions and making changes to my design, I successfully won when Mandy disagreed with her mom and put her in her place. Score one for me. Whatever Karen’s problems are with me, I still have Mandy on my side.