Declan Reede: The Untold Story (Complete Series)

by Michelle Irwin

  “Well, I’m steering clear of Browns Plains—that’s for sure.” I laughed and she joined in.

  “You were dreaming about me,” she accused, the smile dancing on her lips again—as if that thought gave her great pleasure.

  It was my turn to shrug again.

  “What was it about?”

  I closed my eyes and debated what to do. We’d finally started a somewhat pleasant conversation, joking around with each other the way we used to. I’d even started to hope that maybe we could have made it through the next ten hours without another argument. That would likely change if I dredged up the memory of our formal and of me breaking up with her. It was especially dangerous considering we were about to land and even though she’d indicated we’d be side by side for the next leg, I hadn’t confirmed it for myself. Maybe she’d just said that because she’d thought it would get a reaction from me.

  “Aren’t you going to tell me?” she asked.

  I opened my eyes and turned my head to face her. “I’m worried it will upset you.”

  She laughed. “You’re worried about how I might feel?” She sounded incredulous.

  “Don’t be so surprised. I’m not the prick the media thinks I am.”

  “Not always,” she mused. Her smile disappeared as she turned pensive. “But I’ve seen you do some pretty fucked-up things.”

  “You have.” She hadn’t seen the worst of it, but she’d seen enough.

  “Please tell me?” she pleaded quietly. Her bottom lip even stuck out in a cute little pout.

  I frowned. “I don’t—”

  “I have a right to know,” she argued when I didn’t respond appropriately enough for her.

  “How exactly do you figure?”

  “Well, apparently, I was the star attraction. I think that allows me certain privileges.”

  I debated again, before going with a half-truth. “It was about our high school formal.”

  She narrowed her eyes at me. “The formal? Or what happened after?”

  Shit. What did she hear? I stared at her in silence.

  “You know, Josh thought you’d raped me.” Her statement was a quiet, almost-whispered confession.

  I choked on the air as the statement left her lips. Pushing myself forward in my seat, I coughed as I struggled to comprehend what she’d said. The action caused a redoubling of the pain in my chest, and I coughed harder. “What?” I managed to utter between convulsions.

  “What else would you expect him to think? I turned up at home, early, alone, in tears, my feet sore from walking from the bus stop, my dress in tatters, and calling you an arsehole. He put two and two together and came up with rape. You have to believe me that I didn’t know about what he planned, or what he did to you, though. Not until after I found out why you weren’t in school that last week.” The sorrow in her eyes confirmed her words. She had no reason to make any of that up, not now after so long. It would gain her nothing.

  “Well, at least that explains his reaction,” I murmured when I got my breathing back under control. I’d always thought he was delivering a message from Alyssa—to tell me to back off because I didn’t want to follow her rules. I’d simply assumed he’d gone a bit over the top with the delivery as punishment for breaking his sister’s heart again. I’d never suspected that he thought I’d hurt her. The truth was, he’d probably gone easy on me. If I’d thought someone had raped Alyssa, there would be no almost about the hospital stay part. In fact, they’d be lucky if they didn’t find themselves in a morgue.

  “He copped a bit of a serve from me once I found out,” she said with a sad smile on her lips.

  “I really am sorry.” I buried my head in my hands as I considered what I was about to say—and how dangerous the words might be. “I mean about the freak-out I had that morning. I just, I don’t know. I felt trapped, I guess. It felt like we were barrelling along at a million miles an hour. I could already see myself as a grandfather sitting on a porch wondering what the hell happened to my life and when my chance to go racing would come.”

  She nodded, but her brow bent into a frown. “I know. I get it. I felt like that too sometimes. We were pretty . . . intense.” She chuckled darkly after the last word.

  We lapsed into silence, both deep in thought about what could have been. It made me remember the fucker at Queensland Raceway. I wanted to ask her about it, but didn’t want to admit that I had seen her there or the impact—literally—she’d had on my life since.

  “So is there anyone in your life now?” I asked, almost silently. I wasn’t sure whether or not I wanted to hear the answer. Before she had the chance, an announcement was made that we’d be landing soon and instructed the cabin crew to prepare.

  After a moment, Alyssa said, “Not really.”

  It took me a moment to realise it was a response to my question. “What does ‘not really’ mean?”

  “It means . . . I don’t really want to talk about it.”

  “Okay.” Even though I was desperate to know, I didn’t want to press her and end our civility.

  “I’d ask you the same question,” she said, “but we both already know the answer to it.”

  I nodded; she had me there. The whole world knew that Declan Reede liked to screw random women in clubs thanks to Gossip Weekly. Not to mention the fact that I had declared, on numerous occasions, that there was no way I was going to settle down for anyone. That I didn’t need a woman in my life telling me what to do. By Alyssa’s side again, it was almost embarrassing to consider the various things I’d said over the years.

  “Declan, there’s something I do need to talk to you about—”

  She was interrupted by a crew member and after we were alone again, seemed more interested in packing her belongings into her handbag than continuing the conversation.

  After the plane had landed, I pulled both of our carry-on bags from the overhead cabinets while Alyssa collected her handbag. Grabbing her bag from me, she hastily shoved everything inside with no real rhyme or reason. Her hand hovered over the Gossip Weekly magazine in the pocket of the seat in front of us. For a moment, I was certain it would continue to haunt me for the rest of the trip, but eventually she moved her hand away and left it where it was.

  I packed my cap and sunnies away in my bag because I wouldn’t really need them in Hong Kong airport. ProV8 may have been big in Australia, but it hadn’t taken over the rest of the world yet. At least, it wasn’t popular enough to see me inundated with autograph hounds in a foreign city.

  Alyssa slung her bag over her shoulder and slid into the aisle in front of me.

  “I’ll see you in a few hours, I guess,” she said and the dismissal in her tone was clear.

  It certainly left me with no doubt where I stood—only worthy of being spoken to when there was no other choice. “Yeah. Sure.”

  I let a few other people go before making my way into the aisle. If she didn’t want me to be anywhere near her in the airport, that distance might as well start as early as possible.

  Once I was free of the gate, I thought about the things I needed to do in the five hours I had free. Having a shower was certainly on the agenda; I’d spent too long cramped up in the airplane seat and needed to clean. A decent coffee was also on the must-do list.

  Convincing myself not to look for Alyssa, I headed off to try to find a shower. Eventually, I found a lounge that offered food, showers, and a space to relax. Within fifteen minutes, I was under the steady stream, trying to wash away the tension that being near Alyssa had elicited within me. Unfortunately, there was only one way I knew would work for sure.

  Clasping my cock in my hand, I closed my eyes and let Alyssa in. The sight of the few genuine smiles she’d granted me on the trip, the smell of the coconut body wash she clearly still used, and the feeling of her warm body against mine as she’d slept. With her right there in my fantasies, fresher than ever before, I stroked along my length. Visions of the glimpses I’d been given of her new body danced through my mind. Th
e tattoo, her new belly ring, the swell of her breasts. I groaned with need as my hand worked faster.

  Before long, I was tumbling over the edge into a painful bliss. My stomach clenched and released as my orgasm ripped through me, and I gritted my teeth as the agony in my side grew steadily with every spasm. Despite the pain, the relief that filled me was worth it. It’d been too long since I’d come, and it was a literal load off. Especially when I’d have to see Alyssa again before long.

  After drying and dressing in the other outfit I’d packed in my carry-on, I went in search of a coffee and something to eat.

  BY THE time I headed for the gate, it’d been almost four hours since I’d seen Alyssa. I’d considered going to the airline desk and asking if there was any chance I could get bumped to the next flight to London. When I was halfway there though, an ache, which had nothing to do with my ribs, invaded my chest. It was possible the next twelve-hour leg would be the catalyst for purging the memories of Alyssa—even if the first half of the journey hadn’t been.

  My gaze scanned the waiting passengers until they landed on the one person I wanted to see. Pretending not to notice that she was across from where I wanted to sit, I sauntered over to the row of chairs and took a seat. It was only after I was settled that I risked a glance up and acted as if I’d noticed her for the first time.

  “Alyssa.” I nodded and couldn’t help the tiny smirk that twisted my lips as I considered that less than two hours earlier, I’d gotten myself off with thoughts of the first part of our trip. It was like a dirty little secret only I knew, and that was so fucking hot.

  When she looked over to me, her eyes were red-rimmed and filled with sorrow. All thoughts of my happy ending were wiped away at the sight. It was clear she’d spent the better part of the time crying.

  I frowned. Had she been crying over me? It just didn’t seem likely. I mean, I was a fucking catch, but I doubted she had any tears left to cry for what we’d shared. It was too many years ago to still affect her.

  I moved from my position across from her to sit at her side. “Are you okay?”

  She shook her head.

  “What is it?”

  “I just miss—” She risked a quick glance at me and then swallowed heavily. “Home.”

  “Haven’t you only just left?”

  She shook her head. “I’ve been in Sydney for a week already.”

  Holy fuck! She’d been in Sydney for a week and I hadn’t known. My chest burned at the thought. What would I have done if I had found out? I frowned. Really, the least she could have done was contact me to let me know she was close. We could have had dinner or some shit.

  Why would she? It’s not like you have a fantastic track record for answering her calls.

  I frowned and leaned back in the chair.

  “There’s just so much going on,” she murmured. “I can’t deal with it.”

  “You can talk to me if you want,” I offered.

  “Don’t do this, Dec.”

  “Don’t do what?”

  “Don’t act like you care, when you’ve made it clear you don’t.” She stood and moved away from me.

  I sat dumbfounded as I watched her walk away. Did I care? Scarily, the answer might almost have been yes. At very least, I cared much more than I should have.

  Deciding that I didn’t really need to buy into her crap, or invade her life, any more than I already had, I stayed where I was and considered what the fuck I’d said which could have tipped her over the edge like that. And what the fuck she’d been crying about.

  MORE THAN a little pissed at the way Alyssa had stormed off after I’d offered her my shoulder to cry on, I decided to wait to board. I didn’t want to be stuck sitting next to her for a minute longer than I had to be.

  I gladly became the arsehole who waited until his name was called before boarding. Of course by the time I found my new seat, Alyssa was already seated. Her ears were already covered with headphones and she stared unblinkingly at the screen in front of her—even though the in-flight entertainment wasn’t on. The closer I got, the clearer I could see that she was still upset. Tears wet her lashes.

  Without a thought, I yanked my bag up to push it into the overhead lockers but the movement was too rapid and sent a jolt of blinding agony through me. I dropped my bag and clutched at my chest. In an instant, Alyssa was standing in front of me with my bag in her hands.

  “Are you okay?” she asked.

  As if you care. I clenched my jaw and snatched the bag back from her without a word. Ignoring the renewed pain, I carefully lifted my carry-on and forced it between other bags in the overhead locker. Then, without a further word, I plonked myself down on the seat.

  “God you’re such an arse,” she muttered before returning to her seat.

  “Well, I wouldn’t want you to have to act like you care,” I retorted with a sneer.

  A frustrated growl left her lips, but at least her tears had stopped. She jammed her headphones on again and I thought about how similar the take-off would be to the last one. As the thought ran through my head, a chuckle escaped me.

  She glanced in my direction when she heard the laugh, but didn’t say anything. After a minute of silence, she turned to me with a frown. “What’s so funny?”

  I shook my head and laughed again.

  “Dec.” Her voice was filled with a deadly warning. “Tell me.”

  “Just us.”

  Her confusion grew. “I don’t see anything funny about us.”

  “C’mon, Lys.” I laughed. “We’ve barely spent a day together and we’re already doing exactly what we’ve always done.”

  “Which is?”

  “This. Fighting. Talking. Rinse and repeat. Throw in a kiss for good fucking measure, and it’s a condensed version of our entire relationship.”

  She didn’t say anything, but instead turned back to sit in her seat properly, clearly lost in thought.

  “Dec, there . . . there’s something I need to tell you,” she said after another beat.

  I spun to look at her, and saw that her face was pale. She looked like she was about to hurl. I wondered whether she was getting motion sick, but the last flight hadn’t seemed to have caused her any issues.

  Her eyes shifted to the window, she stared out of it for a few seconds as if steeling herself. “I . . .” She met my gaze and her expression fell. The tension in her body released and she slumped like a puppet cut from its strings. “I might be leaving Australia soon.”

  “I’ve got news for you. You already have,” I whispered with a chuckle.

  She shook her head. “No. I mean for good.”

  “Oh.” For reasons unknown to me, that news made my heart plummet to my stomach. “Why?”

  She looked away from me, staring out the window as she spoke. “Well, I’ve just finished my last round of exams at uni. Once I do, I’ll have my Honours in Law.”

  “What’s that got to do with leaving? You can practise law in Australia, can’t you?”

  “I’ve been offered a position with Pembletons. They are the preeminent barristers in London. Well, the world really. They have offices all over.”

  I had no air left in my lungs, and I couldn’t draw any in. The ache along my side intensified as I struggled to breathe. I wondered if the cabin had depressurised in the seconds that she’d spoken. No oxygen masks dropped from the ceiling though, so I considered that maybe it was just me.

  It couldn’t just be me though. My lungs felt too tight—too sizes too small. And my heart . . . it was aching like it would burst at any second.

  My fingers clawed the armrests as I glanced around searching for signs that anyone else was struggling for breath.

  Alyssa kept her focus on the window. “They look for the best of the best of the best, and they’ve offered me a position in either their Sydney or London offices. I just have to choose.”

  I couldn’t breathe. Seriously, shouldn’t those oxygen masks fall soon?

  Alyssa kept talking, but I w
anted to scream at her to shut up. The most important thing was the fact that the plane was losing air, not her happy fucking plans for the future.

  “London seems like the smart choice for the opportunities it will provide. It means a little bit more study but the client base is fantastic.”

  My lungs tore painfully with each breath I tried to gasp down. The reason settled over me with a thud as I looked up into Alyssa’s eyes. I didn’t want her to leave.

  A wave of nausea washed over me and my body started to shake. How the fuck could that be the issue? Why did it matter if Alyssa went to London permanently? I hadn’t spoken to her in almost four years. What difference would distance make to that sort of relationship? Surely having Alyssa be on the other side of the world would make it easier to focus on the racetrack? So why did it feel like she’d just ripped my heart out with her bare hands and was now consuming it while it was still beating in her palm?

  “Don’t go,” I whispered as I clutched at her arm. My voice was broken, pleading. “Please.”

  She gave no indication that she’d heard me, except to close her eyes for half a second. Then she turned toward me, but stared blankly past me and into the aisle. “Dec—”

  My next move shocked even me, but I could only blame the lack of oxygen. My brain was screaming, “No!” even as I moved in toward her. Something compelled me forward though. My lips were on hers in an instant and I felt alive in a way I hadn’t in so long. A tightening sensation washed over my stomach, twisting it in ways which made me almost instantly hard.

  She pulled away from me, her eyes were wide, and her mouth opened into a little O.

  I was still trying to come to grips with what I’d done when her hand whacked across my cheek. The area heated and burned, but was nothing compared to the pain that ripped through my heart after her action. I put my hand over the spot where she’d just slapped me. Shock filtered through my system and tears sprung to my eyes. It took every ounce of willpower I had to stop them from falling.