Family Ties

by Hans M Hirschi

  Sascha could rarely lie still when he was holding Dan like that. Usually, his crotch came to life as it rested between Dan’s naked butt cheeks. And the temptation of fondling Dan’s cock and balls was usually too enticing.

  Tonight was no different, and Dan quickly turned onto his back, allowing Sascha better access. He turned his face, and they kissed.

  “It’s been a long day, Hon,” Dan said. “I’m spent and not sure if I’m up for it. But there’s something that’s been going through my mind today, with all the things that have been happening. Mind if we talk for a bit?”

  * * * * *

  A5

  Helene was making good time on her way to Switzerland. She had left Darmstadt and was now on the freeway toward Basel. There wasn’t much traffic on the road, and her Mercedes rolled calmly at 180 kmh south. Glad I took the Merc, Helene thought. I’ve never driven my Prius at this speed. Then she reminded herself that there was more involved here than her environmentally conscious self. Screw the environment, she told herself. I’ve got a marriage to save, a family to patch up.

  Helene always had a plan, and she didn’t really care what her father thought, or her mother, or Mike, for that matter. Once Helene had made up her mind, she would make sure that her ideas were executed, but tonight, she also felt that her plan was necessary, not only to saving her marriage, but to resolving a looming family crisis.

  * * * * *

  Mike

  Tossing and turning in his bed, Mike couldn’t sleep. His mind was all over the place. When he had retired to his room, he had checked his Blackberry and replied to some of the important messages. The life of an executive, he had thought, a corporate slave, no matter what position you hold, always a bigger fish. A message from the CEO asked him for the latest updates on the Bhopal project. Who cares about Bhopal at ten p.m.? Bigger fish!

  He chuckled at his own philosophy, snatched from a Star Wars movie years ago, Mike had applied the bigger fish analogy to his management philosophy, trying to instill into his direct reports that no matter who you are, no matter how high you climb on the corporate ladder, there will always be someone who climbed higher. Mike was proud of his management philosophies and the lessons he taught to the people reporting to him, including the one about the monkeys on peoples’ shoulders. He’d actually read that somewhere but couldn’t remember where.

  Every time someone walked into their manager’s office, they’d have a monkey on their shoulder, a problem, something they wanted to offload on their boss. Good management practice dictated not only to send the person off with that monkey still on his or her shoulders, but to make sure to hand over another one, thus clearing problems off the desk. A smart idea, really, in theory.

  At some point, he had even considered writing a book, but then again, writing a book on bigger fish and monkeys wouldn’t cut it, not in zoology nor in management theory. Besides, Mike had way too much work to focus on anything else, and so his dreams of writing management handbooks and becoming a consultant remained what they always had been: dreams.

  Fish and monkeys were not on his mind right now though. As he tossed the blanket from his warm body, he could think only about Helene and the marriage he had wrecked with his stupid mistake. How could I do that to her? How could I fall for Parvati? How could I be such an asshole? What did Sascha say to Helene? How did he manage to get her to talk to me? I’ve been such an idiot, so hard on my brother, and yet he helps me out, just like that. What am I going to say to Helene when she calls tomorrow? Is she going to forgive me?

  His mind raced, and there was no way he would get any sleep tonight. Instead, he got up and sat down at a desk. Maybe he could at least get some work done, the one task that would never end.

  * * * * *

  Sascha and Dan

  “What’s the matter?” Sascha asked.

  His head was propped on his left arm, his right still resting on Dan’s chest. There was a sense of worry in Dan’s voice when he asked to talk, and Sascha easily picked up on it.

  “Nothing, really,” Dan replied, although Sascha could sense that this wasn’t the whole truth.

  A strange sensation rushed through his body. Dan keeping stuff from him was not the way they had built their relationship. Often enough they had to defend their open relationship to friends who just couldn’t fathom how a couple could engage in sexual relationships with others. These discussions had become even more intense after the twins had been born, as if children suddenly made one a sex-free being.

  Their argument had always been that their relationship was based on honesty and friendship, not on sex, and that all research available in the area pointed to monogamy being against human nature. It defied the very basis of human nature and the way humanity procreated as a species. In fact, they insisted to their friends, all sexual procreation demanded promiscuity in order to be successful.

  Only then would the ones best adapted to their environment survive and continue to evolve. Research at the Russian Academy of Sciences back in the seventies and eighties had also shown that the average male “cheated” on his partner within two years. The Soviets had never cared to research how soon women did the same, but since the research was focused on straight men, the assumption could be made that women had to behave similarly.

  Sascha and Dan often found that rational arguments stood little chance against the cultural norms and beliefs, and ever since World War II, the norm in the Western world, with the exception of France, bless their hearts, was monogamy, no matter how boring the sex became over time.

  Oddly, it wasn’t that Dan and Sascha didn’t have a good sex life. Their needs were different, and ever since the “Adelaide incident,” as Sascha had compartmentalized it, he didn’t want anal sex, and he didn’t want to deny Dan the pleasures, remembering full well the thrill and rush it had once brought to him.

  “No, it’s nothing serious, Hon, don’t worry. I just want to talk a bit. After all, it’s been a rough day for all of us. You buried your mother today. You must be devastated.”

  “I’m okay. Thanks for thinking about me, though,” Sascha said. “You know as well as I do that this day was long coming. I think this was better for Mom, and it is better for all of us. She’s at peace now, her suffering over. I let go three years ago when she stopped recognizing us. Remember that last visit?”

  Sascha would never forget how one year after they had buried their father, they had visited their mother with the twins, and she had barely allowed them into the room. She was frail and afraid of the strangers she didn’t recognize, and she was not interested in the two toddlers who, although they were asleep in their stroller at the time, certainly only would wreak havoc in her room.

  Dan had taken the kids downstairs to the cafeteria, tears in his eyes, and he’d left Sascha behind to talk to his mother. It was the last time Sascha saw her alive. It didn’t make sense for them to fly from Singapore all the way to Switzerland just to visit a woman who refused to see them.

  Sascha had tried to hold his mother’s hands, to hug her, but she wouldn’t have any of that. Instead, she started screaming for help, afraid that the strange man was assaulting her. The nurses had to intervene. They removed Sascha from the room. He was in tears.

  She had continued to hold onto life for three more painful years of solitude and isolation, her mind all but gone. When liberation came in the form of a massive stroke, she had passed away peacefully in her sleep.

  “No, Dan, I’m fine, really. I’m just glad this is over. The only thing I really worry about starts tomorrow. The meeting with the lawyer. What are we going to do with the kids? I would very much like to have you by my side. I don’t want to make the wrong decision. Mike knows the company inside out, and in his current state, God knows what he’ll be up to.” Years of distrust and his bad relationship with his brother tainted his judgment.

  “Why don’t we ask the lawyer to come to the house?” Dan said. “That way, we can all be in the living room, the boys can play on their own,
and we can supervise them and still participate in the meeting. They’ll be fine.”

  “I love you so much. What would I do without you thinking straight?” Sascha leaned over and kissed Dan.

  “Not sure I’m thinking straight.” He pointed to Sascha’s right hand, circling his belly button and causing a growing erection. “So what has you worried about that meeting? You think your brother may want to cheat you?”

  “I don’t know, I just don’t know. Mike’s always so elusive whenever I ask about the company and what’s going on—if we’re profitable, if there is enough business to keep us going. And we’ve been so busy with the kids and work and everything that I just never really paid attention to it. Heck, I didn’t even attend the general meeting last year. I noticed the dividend paid, but you know that doesn’t mean much. Then again, I may just be paranoid, and everything is fine.”

  “Scoot over,” Dan demanded. “Lie down on your stomach.”

  Sascha complied, and Dan sat up and squatted over Sascha’s legs, his half-flaccid cock coming to rest between Sascha’s butt cheeks. It was an old ritual of theirs, and Sascha didn’t ask what was about to happen. He just relaxed as Dan’s strong hands started to massage the stress and knots out of his back, moaning ever so slightly, as Dan’s strokes and kneading were complemented by a tender kiss every now and then, sending a shiver through Sascha’s body.

  “I love it when you do that. What did I ever do to deserve you?” Sascha whispered as his head was once more pushed into the pillow, and Dan continued kneading his neck and shoulders.

  “I’ll send an invoice.” Dan chuckled.

  Dan enjoyed these tender moments as much as his husband. His cock stood at attention, and he hoped that someday, he might be allowed entry between those sexy, round bubble-butt cheeks of Sascha’s.

  Not tonight, Dan knew that. Sascha was battling a completely different demon tonight, and he wasn’t about to push the issue, knowing that he would only cause more damage if he brought it up. On the other hand, Dan was contemplating his own demons, his own trust issues, and the large secret he kept from Sascha, the one thing he had never dared sharing, not with Sascha, not with anyone.

  After working the worst stress out of his husband’s muscles, Dan lay down behind him and just held him, listening to Sascha’s breathing evening out, becoming more and more regular, until he was certain that the love of his life, his little Swiss boy, his “Peter the Goatherd,” had fallen asleep.

  Then he kissed Sascha gently on the neck, rolled over, and hoped that he, too, would fall asleep soon. He thought about the day, the funeral, Mike’s outburst, the revelations of his brother-in-law’s infidelity, and all of a sudden, his mind wandered back to Larry, his college boyfriend.

  * * * * *

  Larry

  Dan had met Larry in high school. He had come out a few months earlier to his mother, he felt great support in the school club for gays and lesbians, and about that time, he met Larry.

  At first, it was weird. Just because you’re gay doesn’t mean you suddenly find every person of your own sex attractive, and Larry wasn’t really Dan’s type. He was the nerdy kid with thick glasses. His clothes were too baggy, and even though Dan didn’t have a lot of money, he could see that Larry’s family must be pretty poor. Either that or the boy just had bad taste.

  During the club meetings, everybody talked about how cool it would be if they could eventually get married after college, if only California law would allow that. They wanted to have children and live normal lives. They often discussed the various groups in the school, and how the popular kids and the jocks usually didn’t wind up in their club. Of course, they debated which jocks might be gay. The girls engaged in similar speculation about the volleyball girls.

  Dan didn’t really remember when he and Larry had become a couple. It had happened gradually—no spark, no stars, or anything. They just started to hang out, Dan the jock and Larry the nerd. Some people in each of their circles didn’t approve of it, but neither of them cared.

  Dan had no illusions of ever pursuing a sports career, certainly not as a pro. He had realized early enough that being gay and having a career in football or basketball was impossible. He loved both sports and played varsity in both, but still, he was out, period. He got through high school, which was hard enough, but he just didn’t have the heart for sports, so being out really didn’t matter in the end.

  For Larry, the teasing was similar yet different. Being a nerd, he was on the fringes of high school popularity anyway, so being gay did little to affect his social status. Being seen with a jock didn’t enhance his standing with his own friends. What had started out as friendship slowly, gradually evolved into more as the two of them discussed how difficult it was to be teased, sometimes even bullied, just because they didn’t fully fit the profile of their own groups.

  Dan still remembered the first time they had made out, in Larry’s room, tentatively at first, a careful kiss. Then, their resolve strengthened by the amazing feeling of lips touching lips, they ventured further.

  It had been awkward. Dan had come without Larry really touching him, and Larry wasn’t able to keep it much longer. In the months that followed, they ventured on, going from simple hand jobs to more advanced forms of pleasure. At the same time, their emotional bond grew stronger, and they became inseparable. They attended prom together, and ultimately enrolled in the same college. Although Dan’s mom couldn’t afford for him to live on campus, he still spent most of his time with Larry.

  By then, everyone believed they were a forever couple. They were exclusive until their second year in college when Dan met Dale, who was on the water polo team at a nearby school.

  They met at a party and hit it off instantly. Dale was as tall as Dan, well built, and confident. It didn’t take more than a few beers to convince Dan that he’d enjoy spending the night with Dale, and he did. The sex was good. Early the next morning, Dale threw him out. Still a closet case, Dale didn’t want his roommate to catch him red-handed.

  Depressed and hurt, Dan left the dorm and drove back to Larry to seek redemption and forgiveness.

  Larry was surprised when Dan knocked on his door early in the morning. Dan threw himself in his arms and wept, speaking incoherently.

  Finally, Larry calmed him down enough so he could tell his story. Dan still remembered how Larry’s arms literally froze around him that morning, how the loving and comforting arms holding him tightly loosened their grip.

  Eventually Larry broke free, turned around, and said, “Did you really think you could just walk in here and expect me to forgive you? Just like that? We’ve been together for five years, Dan, and I’ve been faithful to you every single second of those five years. I can’t do this now, I can’t deal with this now. I’ve got finals coming up in a few days. I’m sorry, but you have to go.”

  Dan didn’t even try to mend their relationship. He had felt it break apart in that embrace. He had seen the hurt and pain in Larry’s teared-up eyes, the way his shoulders slumped. Larry was stubborn. Dan knew that he’d blown his chances. He left Larry’s dorm and never saw him again.

  He drove back to his mother and unloaded his grief without telling her what had happened. It had been his fault, after all, and he wasn’t ready to deal with it just yet. He certainly wasn’t ready to meet his mother’s wrath over his actions.

  Instead, he turned his attention to his finals and managed to get through those last days of the semester without completely falling apart. He knew he had to get away, knew he had to do something different. Every building, every street corner in Burbank held memories of him and Larry, and every time he walked by Larry’s dorm, the pain became almost unbearable. The worst part of it was that he had brought this upon himself. He had no one else to blame.

  Still, he didn’t really regret having sex with Dale. It wasn’t that the sex was amazing or anything, but it didn’t matter, at least not in the sense that Dan felt he had betrayed anyone. After all, people didn’t break u
p over playing tennis with someone else, or going to a movie. Why was sex, this amazing thing two people shared, so different?

  It wasn’t that he and Larry had a bad or even boring sex life, but after five years, Dan sometimes felt it had become a routine, kind of same old, same old, almost as if they followed a playbook of who’d give head to whom first before Dan would fuck Larry. There was little to no variation, no excitement.

  Dale was exciting, particularly when he gave Dan a good rimming. Larry had never done anything like that before. Heck, they hadn’t even considered it. One thing is certain, I’ll never get involved in a monogamous relationship again, Dan decided on the last day of the semester.

  The next day, he booked a cheap flight across the Atlantic to Paris and decided to spend the summer in Europe, backpacking. He needed to get his act together, needed to think about what he wanted to do next.

  Two weeks later, he met Sascha, and his life changed forever. Fate? Dan wondered.

  * * * * *

  Basel

  At one in the morning, Helene crossed the border in Basel. There was no traffic at this hour except a few semis waiting for their customs inspection. Ever since the passport controls had been removed after Switzerland joined the European Schengen Treaty, getting in and out of the country had become even easier than it had been in the past.

  Helene remembered the old green signs that frequent border crossers had on their cars to signal that they carried no goods. While she had studied in St. Gallen with Mike, she crossed that border often enough, going back to visit her parents at least once a month.