Cowboy SEAL Christmas

by Nicole Helm

  Colin pulled a face, but then he shrugged. “Yeah.”

  “And, well…” Gabe tried to think about what he might have wanted back then, if his mother had chosen someone else. A good man. The kind of man Gabe wanted to be. He owed that to Colin.

  So even though it made his hip twinge, he knelt on one knee in the snow so he could be eye level with Colin. “And I love you too. You’re a part of whatever changes we make. So you’ve got to promise me that you’ll be honest with us when something’s bothering you or not working. Because this is about all three of us, not just me and your mom.”

  Colin stared at him, a considering kind of expression Gabe couldn’t quite read. His heart pounded a little too hard in his chest as he waited for Colin to respond in some way.

  “Are you guys going to get married?”

  Christ. He had to huff out a laugh as he moved back to his feet. Married. It had already crossed his mind, so that wasn’t the shock. It seemed more inevitability than possibility, but it was a complicated question for a kid to ask, for Gabe to answer. Still, he wanted to be straight with Colin. Always. “I have to ask her first. Then she’d have to say yes.”

  “New Year’s Eve.”

  Gabe blinked down at him, but the boy was still watching the llama. “What about New Year’s Eve?”

  “You should ask her on New Year’s Eve. Because that’s the start of a new year. Plus, there’s this movie she always watches on New Year’s Eve with a guy and girl and gross kissing and crying, so she’d probably like it.”

  “Yeah?”

  “Yeah.”

  “That’s soon.” Like a week soon.

  “Mom always says I should do my homework sooner rather than later. Don’t know why this would be any different.”

  “Right. Homework and marriage. Very similar.” Gabe blinked, looking out at where the sun flirted with the horizon. A new day. Christmas Day. A new year. A promise. Inevitability over possibility.

  Hell.

  “You’d be okay with it?”

  Colin finally slid a gaze his way, so much like his mother—practical and certain and just a…force. A force all his own.

  “You and Mom getting married? Yeah, I’d be okay.” But his mouth twitched a little bit, and as he turned his head away from Gabe, Gabe caught a glimpse of a grin.

  “Guess I’d be okay with it too.” He rested his arm around Colin’s shoulders, gratified when Colin leaned into it. “Maybe…tomorrow or the next day you can come to town with me and help me pick out a ring. If you think you can keep it a secret.”

  He puffed out his chest. “Of course I can keep a secret.” He leaned a little harder, looking down so Gabe couldn’t see his face at all. “Would I call you Dad when you guys get married?”

  Oof. Amazing how he wanted to sink to his knees and say yes almost as much as he’d been desperate to run away from this a few days ago. But, God, he wanted to be something of a dad to this kid. And he knew, deep in his bones, he’d do a damn fine job at that, whether he deserved the opportunity or not.

  Deserved didn’t matter when he had people in his life who loved him, whom he loved.

  Still, he wanted to be careful. Evan had never been careful, and Gabe wouldn’t follow any of those ugly footsteps. “That’s up to you, Colin. I’d be your stepdad, and you’d always be mine to me, but…well, it’s up to you. Maybe something to talk to your mom about. She also has to say yes first.”

  “I never knew him, but I know you.”

  Gabe was speechless at that.

  “She’ll say yes. She told me she liked you. That she’d always be friends with you.”

  “She did, huh?”

  “So, she’ll say yes and then I’ll call you Dad.”

  Oh, to have the faith and trust of a ten-year-old. “I’m going to have to trust you on that, buddy.”

  And he would.

  * * *

  Becca’s squeal nearly broke Monica’s eardrum. She engulfed Monica in a hug. “You kept the llama!”

  Monica laughed, hugging Becca back. “I did. Since I hear you were partially behind getting him, he’s now a part of your Christmas celebration.”

  Becca leaned down and gave Macaroni a pat. “Welcome to the menagerie, Mac.” Then she stood back up, eyes suspiciously shiny. “I assume if you took the llama, you took the man too?”

  She glanced back at the truck, where Gabe and Colin were hefting the presents out from the back. “You assume right.”

  Becca gave her another squeeze, then hurried forward to help the men. They brought everything inside and settled into the afternoon being, well, a family. It was a beautiful Christmas cacophony as the boys swiped appetizers and Monica helped Becca and Sandra with dinner prep.

  “Where are Jack and Rose?” Becca fretted.

  “Maybe Rose wasn’t feeling well. Want me to call?”

  Becca shook her head. “Not—” Before she could get the words out of her mouth, the door opened and footsteps echoed through the house.

  “There they are.” Becca wiped her hands on a towel and headed straight for the door.

  Monica followed. She wasn’t sure she’d ever get over the wave of warmth that swamped her every time she saw Gabe’s and Colin’s heads bent together, as they were now, sprawled out on the rug next to the fireplace. They were whispering about something, and Monica made a mental note to ask Gabe about it later.

  She’d managed to have a short conversation with Colin this morning while Gabe had been getting ready, and Colin had been acting shifty and sly. Happy, though. Giddy even, to have Gabe in the cabin. Monica knew it wouldn’t always be this easy or simple, but for Christmas, she’d enjoy it.

  Becca was scolding Jack and Rose for being late as Jack shrugged out of his coat.

  “Sorry, got a bit held up,” Jack said, grinning. He helped Rose untangle from all her winter gear, and Rose grinned up at him.

  “My, you two are suspiciously, overtly happy,” Monica observed.

  “Oh, are we?” Rose said, faux innocently as she slowly pulled the glove off her left hand.

  “Ring!” Becca and Monica shrieked in unison.

  Rose held out her hand proudly. “And a doozy at that.”

  They oohed and aahed over the ring, offering congratulations and some friendly ribbing from Alex and Gabe.

  Becca’s mom reappeared with a bottle of champagne and glasses. She poured, finding some sparkling cider for Rose, Jack, and Colin. When they all had glasses, Alex took the lead.

  He held up his glass. “To Rose and Jack.”

  Everyone echoed the sentiment, clinking glasses, taking happy sips.

  “Wait, I have a toast, too,” Rose said, holding up her glass again. “To a Christmas miracle.” Rose’s gaze moved to Gabe.

  Gabe raised his eyebrows. “What miracle? You finally saying yes to Jack? That’s just you coming to your senses.”

  “That isn’t the miracle,” Rose returned, pointing at Monica, then Gabe. “You two are the miracle.”

  He exchanged a confused glance with Monica. “Huh?” they asked in unison.

  “A few months ago, when you were grumpily working on our house, Rose mentioned you needed to find someone,” Jack explained. “She thought you were lonely.”

  Gabe scowled, but Monica leaned her head against his shoulder. Whether he liked that it had been noticed or not, he had been lonely. Now he wouldn’t be, because he was hers. She glanced at Colin, who was leaning against Gabe’s other side. Theirs.

  “Jack said it would take a miracle to find someone for you,” Rose continued.

  Jack lifted his glass. “So we should toast to Christmas miracles.”

  Monica wanted to be offended, but it was hard to find any kind of outrage in the midst of all this love and joy and Christmas cheer. She lifted her glass, clinked it with Gabe’s, and grinned. “To Chri
stmas miracles,” she murmured.

  “That you are,” he returned, wrapping his free arm around her shoulders and pressing a kiss to her temple.

  “Aww,” Becca said with a sniff. “Now this is the perfect Christmas. And the only thing that can make it more perfect? Let’s eat.”

  The room dissolved into laughter and chatter, everyone filing into the kitchen to load up their plates before coming back to the living room, where the tables were set up.

  Gabe held her back from following the crowd, so she tilted her head up. “What were you and Colin whispering about?” she demanded.

  “Ah, we’re planning a bit of a shopping trip.”

  “And that’s a secret?”

  “It is.” He grinned down at her, overly pleased with himself for a man with secrets. “You’re not invited.”

  “Hey,” she protested.

  “Man time,” Gabe said with a smile before something in his expression went very, very sly. “You wouldn’t happen to know your ring size, would you?”

  “My ri—” Her head jerked up so hard it nearly hurt. “What?”

  “Colin’s quite sure New Year’s Eve is the moment, and he wants it to be a surprise. I’m a little more…careful. I want to make sure you don’t need more time, so he won’t be awfully disappointed. But if I put it off, I think he’ll be fine. So…”

  “So,” she repeated stupidly. She could only gape at him for a few more moments. Rings and asking and… “Gabe.” The funny thing was, she thought she should be wary. She should think it was too fast and too soon.

  But she didn’t feel any of those things. “Do you need more time?” she asked, her voice little more than a whisper.

  His smile widened, and there wasn’t an ounce of hesitation in him. “No. Might have been Colin’s idea, but I wouldn’t have been too far behind.”

  She swallowed at the lump in her throat. “Then I don’t need more time. I might need to measure my finger, but I don’t need more time.”

  “Good,” he murmured, then pressed his mouth to hers.

  “Gross,” Colin groaned as he reentered the room, plate heaped with food.

  “I think you’re going to have to get used to it, baby,” Monica said. “And me saying this: I love you both. More than anything.”

  Colin rolled his eyes, immediately plowing into dinner. “I love you both, too,” he muttered, looking anywhere but at them.

  “And I love you both, too,” Gabe added, even as people filed in with plates.

  As Christmas miracles went, it was the best one she’d ever get.

  Epilogue

  Five Years Later

  “I wish he’d get here already,” Monica grumbled, pacing from the living room to the entryway and then back again.

  Gabe glanced at the clock. “You gave him till one. It’s only twelve forty-five.”

  “Do you think they’re having sex?” Monica demanded. Whether or not Colin assured her he and Katie Lane were just friends, Monica had her doubts. And fifteen-year-olds, whether just friends or not, were definitely thinking about sex.

  Gabe didn’t quite stifle his laugh of surprise. “Er, um, well.”

  “Oh my God. You think they’re having sex! He’s fifteen! If my baby is getting naked with that—”

  “Very nice girl whom you like, I should point out,” Gabe interrupted her outrage. “And they’re with her family. It’s Christmas. The Lanes and the Shaws don’t strike me as the type to let Colin and Katie sneak off and have sex under their noses.”

  Monica crossed her arms over her chest, scowling at him even though he looked beyond handsome there in the glow of the Christmas lights. His wedding band even glinted. Her handsome, good, sturdy husband.

  It soothed, the way it always did when she worried, that she had this man in her life. They’d built the house and moved in four years ago, and Monica only ever missed the cramped cabin around Christmas, when she was feeling particularly nostalgic.

  It was hard to believe it had been five years since that first Christmas together. Hard to believe even now she was standing here in the house they’d built on Revival property, with her husband. There had been so many challenges and so many adjustments. To morph from a family of two to a family of three, for Colin to get used to having two parents instead of one. But things were good lately. Really good.

  She rested her hand on her stomach. More adjustments and more challenges were coming, but Monica knew they’d face them, conquer them. Together.

  “And you’re not going to grill him when he gets here, because you can’t put off telling him any longer,” Gabe warned.

  Her scowl turned into a nose wrinkle. “I just…” She knew it was time. Time to tell Colin and the others. Her stomach was starting to round, and she couldn’t hide it much longer.

  They’d suffered a loss early on in their marriage. It had hit them all hard, even Colin, and they’d only just this year decided to try again. It had taken a while, but here they were.

  They’d been cautious about telling anyone, especially Colin. But Gabe was right. She needed to get over her worry, her fear, and tell him.

  She sank onto the couch next to Gabe. She looked up at him, needing some reassurance, and wasn’t she lucky she had a husband who always obliged? “Do you ever get so happy you worry something terrible is going to happen and take it all away?”

  He tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. “Yeah.”

  She harrumphed. “Well, as long as I’m not alone,” she said gloomily. She’d expected some kind of pep talk, not easy agreement.

  But he slid his arm around her shoulders and drew her close. “I learned a long time ago the bad times will come, no matter what you do. The best we can do is enjoy the good while we have it and build whatever we can that’ll withstand the bad.”

  She kept trying to frown, but it kept tugging up at the corners. “My, you’ve gotten wise in your old age.”

  “You’re not far behind in the age department, and don’t you forget it.” He dropped a kiss to her mouth. “Whatever happens, today, tomorrow, in ten years, we’ll get through it.”

  She nodded—ah, there was her pep talk. “I know. Sometimes I need to hear you say it, but I know.” She leaned forward, brushed her mouth against his. “I love you.”

  “I know,” he replied very solemnly.

  She hit him, but he only grinned wider.

  “I love you, too. And in five years, I’ve never gotten tired of saying it. I have never felt as though I didn’t mean it. I love you more, somehow, with each passing year. Day, maybe. You’ve opened up a whole new world to me. One of trust and love and faith and family. Even when we’re yelling at each other or at Colin, I never doubted it. Not for a moment.”

  She could only gape at him, tears falling onto her cheeks. He always told he loved her, but they weren’t ones for poetic, emotional words like that.

  The door banged open, and then Colin’s heavy, quick footsteps sounded even as the door slammed again.

  Gabe touched his nose to Monica’s and looked her straight in the eye. “Tell him. It’s Christmas. No excuses.”

  She nodded, turning to smile as Colin skidded into the living room.

  “Not late. Early even,” Colin announced proudly. He looked at Monica, then Gabe. “Shit, did someone die?”

  “No one died,” she replied, wiping the happy tears off her cheeks. “And don’t say ‘shit’ in front of me. Sit down. We have some news for you. Good news.”

  “You’re getting me a car!”

  Monica glared, but Colin grinned at Gabe as he sat himself on the fireplace hearth. He’d turned into all limbs almost overnight. A teenager, talking cars and college or the marines or whatever that would get him the hell out of Montana ASAP all the time. So close to adulthood he could taste it.

  It broke both Gabe’s and Monica’s hearts a little
bit, but they knew Colin needed that space. To dream. To spread his wings. Much as it pained her.

  Besides, they still had three years to convince him he was very, very wrong.

  “So, what’s the news?” Colin asked, vibrating with energy. He usually was, but always a little bit more so after he’d spent time with Katie Lane. Monica didn’t like to think about that.

  Monica grabbed Gabe’s hand, and he squeezed, which was what she needed. A gentle urging. Some courage. “Well, in a few months…May actually, you’re going to be a big brother,” Monica said carefully.

  Colin’s eyes widened. He grinned, before sobering. “It’ll…be okay this time?”

  “We can’t promise that, of course, but so far, the doctor says he or she is very, very healthy. In fact, we get to find out if it’s a brother or a sister next month.”

  Colin’s grin was immediately back. “Cool. Cool.”

  Monica laughed a little. The tears were back, but she didn’t shed them even as she turned to Gabe and rolled her eyes. “So very cool.”

  “Yeah,” Gabe said, brushing a kiss against the back of her hand. “The coolest.”

  * * *

  Gabe parked in front of Revival next to Jack and Rose’s truck. The kids were out building snowmen under Alex’s watch. He held his youngest at his hip, so bundled up you couldn’t even be sure there was a baby under there. His oldest played happily with Rose and Jack’s two.

  Gabe’s heart squeezed. It was amazing the way they’d built this family when it had all started with a tragedy.

  When Colin stepped out of the back of the truck, Mac jumping out behind him, the kids forgot their snowmen and came running, both for Colin and the llama.

  “Guess what, guys,” he heard Colin announce. “I’m finally going to be a big brother!”

  The kids squealed happily, because Colin was their favorite since he always greeted them with tosses into the air. Mac danced through the snow, happily basking in the attention of the little ones.