Ransacked Heart

by Jayne Bauling

  As it was, the most she could hope for was his speedy return to Hong Kong, but for now she supposed she would just have to endure a certain amount of contact, as he had warned her earlier at the party just before leaving her with Cavell Fielding and Penny Seu Chen.

  ‘I plan to be around over the next few weeks while we get this new image launched, and we expect you to be very visible. Obviously we haven’t gone for whole-sale personnel changes, so you’re the hook on which we’re hanging the idea, a new programme manager whose own image is the station’s—young, smart, sophisticated and committed to the music. Taiwan is one of the most Westernised countries in this region, and our last few surveys have shown that we’re attracting an extensive local listenership now, covering an age-group ranging from mid-teens to late thirties, so we want to ditch a lingering perception that we exist solely for the benefit of non-nationals. Giles Estwick will have discussed it with you, and you’ll have ideas of your own. Cavell will want to hear what they are, as well as some appropriate biographical details for Press releases, as she’s handling the publicity angle for us. She’s the best there is, so consult her if there’s anything you’re unsure of on that side.’

  ‘But only on that side?’ Maria had prompted derisively.

  Luke’s smile was equally mocking. ‘Obviously we understand each other perfectly already.’

  ‘I understand you,’ she corrected him sharply. ‘I should. Rats aren’t exactly rare.’

  ‘Highly intelligent, though,’ Luke retorted dismissively, apparently uperturbed, but hostility still glinted in his eyes.

  ‘Every rule has its exception,’ she snapped.

  She could work with Cavell, Maria had decided by the next afternoon. Along with a Chinese freelance photographer, Cavell had called for her that morning and whisked her round some of Taipei’s famous land-marks, the all-marble Chiang Kai-Shek Memorial, a colourful Buddhist temple, and the Grand Hotel with its magnificent Chinese architecture, pausing only long enough at each for the young man to take the photos that would help introduce Maria to the Taipei public, before escorting her back to the apartment and approving the outfit she planned to wear to the dinner the radio station was hosting for the rest of the local media that night.

  ‘You’d better have the afternoon to yourself as I imagine the heat and humidity must be hitting you,’ she decided, preparing to depart. ‘We’ll see you tonight.’

  ‘Will everyone be attending?’ asked Maria.

  ‘Except for whoever’s on duty. It’s expected,’ Cavell added drily.

  ‘Mr Scott?’

  ‘Of course. He’s taking a personal interest in this.’

  Personal. The word disturbed Maria for a while afterwards, although Cavell probably hadn’t given it any real thought, since she appeared so untroubled, her manner calmly confident and still strictly professional.

  Maria was checking her public face, glittering tawny colour smudged lightly over her eyelids, darkening at the outer corners, lips defined with vivid colour, when the doorbell rang that evening, and she went to open it, expecting Nicky Kai, who had telephoned during the afternoon to suggest that the three of them share a taxi again tonight.

  Surprise made her catch a breath, but it was the swiftly ensuing resentment that held it locked in her lungs for seconds after she should have expelled it as she stared questioningly at Luke Scott, casually elegant in a beautifully made lightweight jacket worn over a pale shirt and obviously expensive trousers with a discreetly fashionable belt.

  ‘Are you ready?’ he enquired, eschewing any conventional greeting.

  ‘What do you want?’ Maria demanded rudely, not yet fully recovered from the oddly physical shock of seeing him so unexpectedly.

  Luke didn’t answer her immediately, but the grey eyes were eloquent as they dropped to the tiny cham-pagne-coloured skirt the slenderness of her legs made permissible, then travelled upwards again in slow appraisal of her strapless matching bustier, encrusted with transparent beads and revealing both her smooth olive-toned midriff and the upper swell of her high, proud breasts beneath the single fine circle of gold she wore about her neck.

  ‘Do you really want to go into that now?’ he challenged her softly, his ironic gaze returning briefly to her party face and the shiny, streaky curls that tumbled over her brow and about her neck, just skimming her bare shoulders. Then he glanced at his watch. ‘I don’t think we have time.’

  ‘I meant, why are you here?’ Maria elaborated bitingly, suppressing reactions more heated than simple anger.

  ‘To make sure you get to this dinner tonight.’ It was tersely volunteered.

  ‘Cavell never said anything about this,’ she protested tightly.

  ‘Cavell doesn’t know.’

  She had already guessed that, and her smile was blistering as she registered his arrogance all over again. He not only believed that she would be a willing accessory to his two-timing Cavell, but that Cavell either wouldn’t realise what was happening or wouldn’t mind if she did.

  ‘Then forget it. I’ve already made arrangements to go with Nicky and Florian.’

  ‘Cancel them. God, do you think Nicky really wants you hanging around?’ Luke added disgustedly, his expression growing relentless.

  ‘Does Cavell?’

  ‘Cavell doesn’t come into this. Get used to the idea, Maria. I’m going to be partnering you at most of the functions you’ll be required to attend in your professional capacity over the next few weeks.’

  ‘That wasn’t in my contract, and there was no mention of it in the programme Giles and Cavell have outlined for me either.’ Maria produced a whisper of a laugh. ‘In fact, I could swear your image-maker wants me to come across as a free spirit, someone who doesn’t need the convention of a male escort—and I don’t. It won’t be a pretence.’

  ‘Nevertheless, you’ll have one,’ Luke told her inexorably.

  ‘You?’ Maria derided.

  ‘Who else? Unless you’ve moved unbelievably fast, Nicky Kai still has a claim on Jones, and while some of the other jocks may have shown signs of making themselves available as reserve players last night—yes, I noticed the attention you attracted—they’ll just have to wait their turn.’ The look Luke gave her was cautionary as she stirred rebelliously, brilliant lips parting. ‘And perhaps I should remind you that the contract you’ve just cited binds you as securely as it does us, unless you’re willing to face interminable legal hassles in an effort to extricate yourself.’

  ‘Why are you doing this?’ The passionate question was involuntary and, regaining a measure of both control and fighting spirit, she went on quickly in a lightly mocking tone, ‘And what’s Cavell Fielding’s reaction going to be when she does know about these…plans you have for escorting me? And not so much about the fact of them, as the reasons behind the fact?’

  ‘You seemed to understand it clearly enough last night, so why not now? I won’t have Cavell dragged into our personal affairs.’

  It was offered as a warning, but the threat was unmistakable.

  ‘Our personal affairs!’ Maria sent him a smouldering glance as her mind screamed its resistance to the idea of there ever being anything personal between them, and every muscle in her body clenched in physical imitation of that wild denial.

  Luke shrugged indifferently, his face hard but still astonishingly handsome.

  ‘How else should I phrase it? I can be a lot more crude if you want me to.’

  ‘I’m sure you can!’ Maria snapped, and flung out a hand, unconscious of the helpless appeal allied to imperative demand in the gesture as control slipped once more. ‘Tell me why you’re doing this, damn you!’

  ‘Why?’ he repeated, his eyes resting on the suddenly tempestuous shape of her mouth. ‘Because arriving with you makes it easier for me to leave with you—to take you home, Maria.’

  And all that the phrase implied. He didn’t need to be more explicit. She flung up her head, bright satin-smooth curls shaking.

  ‘I’d rather
die!’

  It rang with pride and passion, the intensity of the emotion heightening the slightly exotic aspect of her peculiar beauty which was in reality merely the end sum of a wonderfully mixed ancestry of ordinary Celts, Latins and Anglo-Saxons.

  Luke laughed, his amusement genuine for a moment.

  ‘How extremely dramatic!’

  ‘But true,’ she insisted, her eyes still stormy.

  ‘And passionate.’ Grey eyes were turned silvery by a gleam of speculation. ‘Do you make love as passionately as you hate?’

  ‘Love?’ Maria scorned, and saw his lips twist in acknowledgement.

  ‘You’re right—a badly chosen phrase,’ he conceded derisively as he looked at his watch again. ‘The limi-tations of our language…Ring Jones and tell him I’m taking you to this dinner.’

  ‘Because arriving with me will make it easier for you to leave with me?’ Maria threw his explanation back at him. ‘Easier being the limited English way of saying—less likely to excite comment and speculation?’

  ‘If you like,’ he allowed tautly.

  ‘And it will look more as if you’re carrying out a professional duty.’ Surging resentment drove her on. ‘So if you don’t want anyone thinking you might be with me for personal reasons, why bother?’

  ‘You know why,’ Luke asserted, suddenly harsh.

  But she didn’t really. Oh, yes, she recognised the sexual awareness that was an integral part of his attitude towards her, and it made her uneasy, but he couldn’t really mean to do anything about it when he despised her so intensely. His talk was just that, talk aimed at intimidating her, but she would never give him the satisfaction of allowing him to succeed. Six years ago, her own bewildering awareness of him, the way it had made her feel threatened, must have been obvious to him when his simple presence, a glance in her direction, the sound of his voice, had been enough to unnerve her; but these days she answered back—and for some reason he was hell-bent on punishing her for what he believed her to be, humiliating her with constant reminders of his contempt.

  But he would never actually touch her, Maria decided, directing a quick look at the resolute line of chin and jaw and the arrogant curve of his nose. Strength of character and a confident decisiveness were implicit in the hardness of that darkly handsome face, and while the curve of his lower lip was disturbingly sensual, there was a fastidiousness there too which ought to be reassuring. He wouldn’t be able to bring himself to touch her, because if he did, the contempt he felt for her would be extended to himself, and she thought Luke Scott was too intelligent a man to submit to anything so destructive. Like most successful, powerful men, he would cherish his self-respect.

  She had no need to feel so uneasy in his presence. All she had to do was steel herself to get through the forthcoming weeks until he returned to Hong Kong and she was left to immerse herself in this new job in peace, free of the distraction he constituted.

  Half convinced, she shrugged philosophically and turned to leave the apartment’s square entrance hall in which they were standing, aware of Luke following her into the luxuriously appointed lounge, a long elegant room which ended in sliding glass doors opening on to a balcony with a view she had spent part of the afternoon enjoying, pretty green parkland dotted with ornamental ponds linked by a winding, deeply cut stream that was spanned by the occasional arched stone bridge.

  A hand on the telephone receiver, she paused in the act of reading Florian and Nicky’s number which was jotted down on the pad beside it, and threw Luke a challenging glance.

  ‘Aren’t you afraid I’ll give you away to someone?’ she taunted. ‘Florian and Nicky, for instance? Suppose I tell them that you want to escort me tonight for personal reasons?’

  Luke shrugged, unperturbed. ‘Perhaps there isn’t that much need for discretion. You’re a beautiful woman, after all, intelligent and successful in your career—and unknown here. Other than myself, probably only Florian Jones knows what you really are and he at any rate obviously doesn’t find the reality at all unpalatable.’

  Maria’s eyes flashed. ‘Oh, yes, Florian knows what I am, Mr Scott. You don’t.’

  ‘Get on with it,’ he urged her impatiently, indicating the telephone, and she did, speaking swiftly when Florian answered.

  ‘Flo? Did Nicky tell you what we arranged? Yes, only you don’t need to call for me after all. Mr Scott is here, so I’ll go with him and see you later…Satisfied?’ she added sweetly as she replaced the receiver, finding Luke still watching her.

  ‘Nicky’s present naÏveté surprises me slightly,’ he observed. ‘But perhaps she has yet to realise what she’s letting herself in for, using her name to get you installed here, allowing you to share their transport…It’s a very cosy set-up, as you admitted last night, but I don’t suppose she knows what it’s leading up to, if Jones has conveniently forgotten to mention the exact nature of your past relationship.’

  ‘I don’t know why you’re surprised, when you seem to expect other people to be naive enough to remain blind to what you’re trying to do,’ Maria flared edgily, thinking of Cavell especially. ‘But in fact there’s nothing naive about what Nicky is doing, as she knows the nature of our relationship perfectly well. She’s simply being as welcoming and hospitable as I’ve always heard the Taiwanese are, and trying to help me feel at home and among friends because she knows what it’s like to be a newcomer in a foreign city herself.’

  ‘And because she believes your relationship with her lover is a thing of the past.’ The suggestion was laced with condemnation. ‘But it’s not, is it? You can’t leave each other alone. The two of you have followed each other halfway round the world over the years, and she’ll shut you out once she realises that your affair is something you renew periodically.’

  ‘In between all our other affairs, I suppose? Where do you get these ideas from?’ Maria derided angrily. ‘Apart from anything else, these are the nervous nine-ties, in case you haven’t realised, not the sixties or seventies when no one thought twice about having lots of different partners.’

  ‘Oh, I know people such as you and Jones like yourselves too well not to make sure you’re safe.’ It was so cynically dismissive that she was momentarily speechless, and he added, ‘Shall we go?’

  ‘Yes, let’s,’ she consented cuttingly. ‘If we don’t hurry we’re likely to meet Florian and Nicky in the lift, and right this minute I don’t think I could bring myself to keep quiet about the things you’ve just been saying.’

  She was still seething when they got into his luxury car, hired, he told her, as he didn’t keep one of his own here, his visits to Taipei being infrequent and usually brief.

  ‘Has Estwick spoken to you about the vehicle clause in your contract?’ he added, easing into the heavy evening traffic.

  ‘Yes, but I’ve said I’ll experiment for a while before making a decision. Taxis seem to be plentiful, and the fares are very moderate.’

  ‘Too plentiful. Along with all the motorbikes, they contribute to the traffic problem which is probably one of the worst in the world, and certainly one of Taiwan’s major problems, along with an over-competitive edu-cational system and political isolation.’

  ‘I’ve never seen so many motorbikes at once before,’ Maria confessed, staring disbelievingly at one in the lane alongside, two small children wedged between youthful-looking adults. ‘I checked out the problems before accepting this job, but the virtues seemed to balance them, which is usually the way anywhere.’

  ‘Cleanliness, low unemployment and crime rates,’ Luke suggested.

  ‘They were among the things that attracted me.’

  ‘But Jones was the real attraction, presumably.’

  Maria drew a sharp breath. ‘Why does there have to be a man in it somewhere?’ she demanded.

  ‘There’s always a man with women like you.’ It was deliberately offensive.

  ‘Is that what this is all about?’ she demanded. ‘Except that you admitted last night that you don’t lead
an absolutely pure life yourself, I could almost believe that you’re one of those buttoned-up celibates, offended by the mere idea of any sort of relationship, even if it’s between other people.’

  Luke laughed. ‘No, Maria, I’m not celibate, but I’m probably more discriminating than you are, and I’ve always avoided triangles.’

  ‘Your hypocrisy is incredible!’ Temper sharpened her voice. ‘If that’s the creed you apply to your relationships, why are you doing this?’

  ‘Why not? You and I are both free, there’s no husband or wife languishing somewhere in the background, no children involved.’

  ‘Oh, of course, a piece of paper, a ring and a blessing make all the difference!’ She slanted him a scornful glance. ‘So why doesn’t Nicky Kai come in for a share of all this moral condemnation, since you know that Florian is still legally married?’

  ‘The marriage may exist legally, but hardly in fact. He hasn’t been back to South Africa in years.’ He paused. ‘But it was very much a fact when you were first involved with him, wasn’t it? His young wife was pregnant. Presumably you were the cause of their separation. Why was there no divorce?’

  ‘Rachel and her family don‘t believe in it.’ Maria snapped. ‘And it suits Florian because it gives him a valid excuse when the women he gets involved with start talking about marriage.’

  ‘You know him very well, don’t you?’ He slid her a contemplative look. ‘Does it suit you equally well?’

  ‘It doesn’t matter to me one way or the other. You’re wrong about me, Mr Scott,’ she went on flatly. ‘I could tell you how and why, but I’m not going to, because I don’t care what you believe. Your thoughts and opinions just don’t matter to me.’

  She hadn’t thought it out properly before, but it hit her squarely and solidly now. She would not explain herself to Luke Scott, because to do so would mean he mattered to her, and to let him matter in even the smallest way was to make herself vulnerable—to let him in at some level, and she had an intuitive sense of the havoc he could wreak once admitted to the number of those people who mattered in her life in their various ways.