by Kaylee Ryan
“Wait,” she murmurs.
Keeping my hand on her bare back, I give her time. It’s not until I feel her arms moving, reaching around her back and the bed dip that I realize what she’s done. She just tossed her bra onto the floor with all her other clothes. There is not a single item of clothing covering our top halves. When she lies down this time, it’s nothing but her smooth, soft skin and her full naked breasts that press against my chest. I run my hand up and down her bare back, memorizing the softness of it. I’m lost in the feeling, of her half-naked against me, trying to keep my dick under control. An action I’m not doing well with at the moment. When her soft lips press against my bare chest, I fight the urge to devour every fucking inch of her.
“Savvy was right,” she says into the darkness.
“Yeah,” I agree, because nothing has and, I’m certain in this moment, nothing will ever feel this way again. “Can I touch you?” I ask, needing my hands on her, all over her, more than I need my next breath.
“Can I touch you?” she counters.
“I’m all yours.” I say the words, but I inwardly send up a silent prayer that I can keep from losing control. If she touches my dick, it’s over. I won’t be able to hold back, not with the feel of her naked breasts pressed against my chest and my hand on the soft skin of her back. Her hands find their way to my abs. With her index, finger she traces every line, every curve of my muscles. “Austyn?” I ask, because I need to touch her too.
Instead of answering, she takes hold of my hand that’s not on her back, the one that I have fisted at my side—the one trying to play it cool that this isn’t the single most intense interaction of my life. That’s the hand that she grabs. Propping herself up on her elbow, she places my hand on her bare breast, and I groan.
“Please.”
My hand trembles, but I don’t let that stop me. Gently, I squeeze, testing their firmness. Austyn lies back on the bed, presenting both breasts to me. “I need to see you.”
“Okay.”
Scrambling, I jump out of bed. I just need enough light to see her, to remember how she looks in this moment. The bedside lamp will be too much. I rush to the bathroom and turn on the light over the sink, then pull the door closed. A small sliver of light peeks through the crack. I turn my gaze toward the bed and take in the beauty before me. Her eyes are on me, as she remains on her back, hands gripping the sheets beside her.
“You’re beautiful.” My voice is deep and gravelly. Slowly, I walk back to the bed, my step uncomfortable with my erection. I’ve never been this hard in all my life. I slide my hand down my shorts and adjust myself. Her eyes follow my hand, and her mouth opens and then quickly closes as she licks her lips.
“You coming back to bed?” she asks.
Not needing to be asked twice, I climb back in beside her. This time it’s me who’s on my side, propping myself up on my elbows. My cock is throbbing, but I ignore it. I put all my focus on her. Hesitantly, I reach out and pinch her nipple between my thumb and index finger.
“Slade.” Her voice is breathy, and it turns me inside out knowing she’s turned on, that my touch does this to her.
“Yeah, angel.”
Her hand reaches out for me, and her nails scrape across my abs. She continues onward until she reaches the waistband of my shorts. She slips her index finger under the thick band, and the tip of her finger brushes the head of my cock.
“Is that?” There’s disbelief in her voice.
“Yeah,” I groan. Leaning in, I capture her nipple between my lips. She moans and her hand grips the back of my head.
“Do that again,” she gasps.
Not willing to disappoint her, I do it again. This time, I nip the stiff bud with my teeth, not hard, just enough to cause her to arch her back off the bed. Her hands dig into my hair and hold me to her. And as if my mouth has a mind of its own, I lavish her breasts with attention. Between my mouth and my hands, I can’t seem to get my fill of her. She’s writhing on the bed beneath me, and that does nothing but spur me on and makes lying in this position, with my cock hard as steel, uncomfortable as hell, but no way am I moving. Not until she tells me to. I can do this all night, until I have to leave in the morning.
“I need,” she breathes, and I pull my head away, letting her wet hard nipple fall from my mouth.
“What do you need?” I’ll give her anything in this moment.
“I want to touch you,” she says shyly.
“Fuck,” I mutter under my breath. I’m wracking my brain, trying to come up with a way to tell her that if she gets her hands on me, things will get… messy. Before I can find the words to explain it, without looking like the inexperienced ass that I am, she pushes on my chest, causing me to fall back on the bed. She moves over, resting her head on my chest. Instinctively, my arms wrap around her, settling on her hip.
The only sound in the room is our breathing, the rain, and the thump, thump, thump of my heart as it beats against my chest. Her hand roams again over the dips and valleys of my abs. This time, she doesn’t stop at the waistband of my shorts. This time, she slips her small hand underneath and cradles my hard length in the palm of her hand.
“It’s hot,” she murmurs, scooting further down the bed.
“Austyn.” Her name is a warning, one that I can’t seem to complete with her hands on me.
“And smooth. It’s not at all what I expected.” She moves even further down the bed, sitting up and pulling my shorts down over my erection. I lift my hips, because what else would I do in this moment? I need to tell her that much more, and I’m going to lose my shit, but the feel of her hands on me, the way she’s watching as she gently strokes me from root to tip, that’s all her, and who am I to say she can’t touch me? I told her that I was hers and I meant it.
“Austyn.”
“I don’t want to hurt you. Show me what feels good.”
“Shit,” I hiss. “Everything. It—” I swallow hard on her downward stroke. “—feels good,” I finish with a huff.
“Are you, I mean, do you think you can come like this? I know it’s not sex, but do you think?”
“I know,” I manage to croak out.
“Really?” she asks, surprised.
“Mmm-hmm.”
She gets even closer. “It’s soft and hard at the same time, I wonder….” Her voice trails off.
Closing my eyes, I focus on taking deep, even breaths and not coming. I want this to last as long as possible—her hands on me. This is not a situation I want to rush through. When her hot wet tongue swipes across the tip, I rise from the bed. “Woah.”
“Did I hurt you?” she asks, turning to look at me.
I tuck a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “No, but I was close with your hands on me. You do that again and it’s going to be over.”
“You mean this?” she asks, bending, and this time, she takes the tip in her mouth.
“Fuck,” I breath, placing my hand on the back of her neck. I don’t push her; instead, I just rest it there, loving the connection. I stare down into my lap and watch her take more of me with every bob of her head. When she takes all of me, my balls tighten. “Austyn, babe, you need to… fuck you need to stop. I’m close,” I try to warn her. She ignores me and continues. Her mouth is hot and perfect. And fuck, it’s the most incredible sensation I’ve ever had. “Austyn,” I groan. “Babe.” I move my hand from the back of her neck to her shoulder, trying to warn her. She shrugs me off and keeps going. The sensation is overwhelming, and on her next downward stroke, I spill into her mouth. My entire body is on fire, as if electricity is coursing through my veins. I struggle to catch my breath. My eyes are closed, but I doubt I could see clearly anyway. Flopping back on the bed, my hand on her bare back, and soak up the most intense orgasm of my life. Of course, when you’re a one-man show, it’s bound to be mediocre.
I CAN’T BELIEVE I JUST did that. I’ve listened to Savvy talk about sex for years, about doing this exact thing, and I could never seem to wrap my he
ad around the fact that she also enjoyed it. Now… I get it. He’s smooth and hard, and the thrill alone, knowing that I was the reason he was coming undone, pushed me to finish. The finish, though, is not such a great thing. He tastes hot and salty and… thick. I guess it’s something I’ll get used to.
Maybe.
Possibly.
“Austyn,” he pants my name. “Come here.”
My cheeks are hot and my lips are swollen, and the rush of what I just did still courses through my veins. Slowly, I move up the bed, lying down beside him. I’m breathing heavy from the excitement. Slade rolls onto his side and props himself up on an elbow. He reaches out and traces his index finger up my stomach. He takes his time traces each breast, making sure to run the pad of his thumb over my nipples. Closing my eyes, I bask in the joy of having his hands on me. It’s going to be a long time before we’re here like this, together again. When his finger slips under the waistband of my shorts, my eyes pop open. He’s watching me.
“I need to do that for you.”
“D-do what?”
“Make you feel it, the bliss that you gave me.” I don’t say anything because of the lump in the back of my throat. I’m nervous. He takes my silence as the acceptance that it is and pushes his hand beneath the waistband. “Lace,” he murmurs.
“I’ve never….” My voice trails off. I don’t want to ruin the moment, but my nerves are getting the best of me.
“Me either.” Gently, he runs his thumb over me, the thin piece of lace doing nothing to mask his touch. “You, this night, all of it is new for me too. This entire trip.”
A few more strokes over my panties that are now soaking wet and I’m ready to beg for more. He must read my mind because he slips his hand under the thin scrap of lace. His fingers are a ghost of a touch that sends shocks of desire through my system. “Slade.” His name is a plea.
“Yeah, angel?” He gazes down at me, his eyes dark with need. The look he gives me causes my heart that’s already beating erratically to thump harder against my chest. I open my mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. So, I do the next best thing. I lift my hips. He doesn’t hesitate to pull my sleep shorts and panties to midthigh. I try to open for him, wanting him to touch me, but I’m restricted. “Off.” Knowing what I need, he slowly peels them down my legs. I kick them off, not caring where they land. Feeling brazen with need, I slowly widen my legs, giving him access. When he sucks in a breath, I try to shut my legs, embarrassed, but his large calloused hands stop me.
“Fuck, Austyn.” His deep voice rumbles as he leans in close, so close I can feel his breath… there.
With rapt attention, I watch him as his head lowers and he presses a kiss just above where I need him. The feel of his lips against my skin, so close to my slit, has me writhing beneath him.
Slade moves up the bed, hand resting between my thighs, his thumb lightly rubbing, driving me crazy. When he reaches me, his mouth fuses with mine. His tongue seeks entrance, and I open for him at the same time he slides his fingers through my folds. I gasp into our kiss, but that doesn’t stop him. His tongue strokes against mine as his fingers continue to explore me.
“More?” he asks against my lips.
I can’t speak, so I bury my hands in his hair and hold him to me. I need his lips on me, his hands on me. I need it all—anything and everything he’s willing to give me. Slade takes that as his answer and kisses me deeply, as if he needs our kiss to survive. When his finger slides inside of me, I moan in the back of my throat.
He pulls back, but barely. “Talk to me, angel. Am I hurting you?”
“N-no.”
“The last thing I ever want to do is hurt you. I need you to tell me what you need. What feels good.” He presses a kiss to my neck, just under my ear. “We’ll learn together,” he whispers. Lazily, he moves his finger. In. Out. In. Out. I lift my hips, and he chuckles. “Good?”
“So good,” I sigh.
“Another?” he asks, pressing a chaste tender kiss to my lips.
“I-I’m not sure. We can try.” I don’t know if another is too much, but I know what he’s doing is driving me crazy and I don’t want him to stop.
“Tell me if it’s too much.” His lips that are next to my ear bite down lightly on my lobe. His lips trail across my cheek until they land on mine once again. “Ready?” I nod, and as he slides in two fingers, he kisses me again, deep, his tongue commanding mine, the way his fingers are commanding my body.
“Slade,” I pant.
“What do you need?”
“I don’t’ know.” I don’t. I can’t tell him, but I know I need something. I can feel it… the electricity pulsing through my veins.
“Slower?” he asks, slowing his movements.
Immediately, I know that’s not it. “No.” I lift my hips, seeking out his touch.
“Faster then?” He increases the speed of his fingers.
“More,” I plead. Fast is better, so much better.
“This too much?” He nips my bottom lip.
“No.” My hands move from his hair to his shoulders, and I grip him tightly. I can feel it; it’s as if pressure is building. “There,” I gasp.
“God, you’re beautiful,” he says.
Opening my eyes, I see he’s watching me. The expression on his face is full of… wonder? I’m too wrapped up in the sensations washing over me to define it. Watching me intently, he thrusts faster, causing my nails to dig into the skin on his shoulders. When he starts to slow, taking my pleasure for pain, I force the words, “Don’t stop,” past my lips.
He nods and goes back to it, his eyes locked on mine. It takes seconds before I feel it. The intense, overwhelming sensation takes over. I’m hot and my eyes close as I succumb to the overpowering waves of pleasure that crash through my body. It’s there, and then it’s gone, leaving havoc in its wake. I’ve never felt anything as intense, as powerful as what just happened. My eyes are closed, my legs shaky, and my heart’s racing; it’s intense. When I feel his hand leave my core, I lazily open my eyes. He’s still looking at me.
“I—” He swallows hard. “I’ve never,” he starts again, “seen anything as beautiful as you when you lose control. I could feel you, Austyn. Your body gripping my fingers. Fuck, I wish I had the words to explain it to you.’
“You were pulsing in my mouth,” I tell him. My voice is weak as I struggle to catch my breath, but I need to tell him that I know what he’s feeling.
“Yeah.” He buries his face in my neck. “How am I going to leave tomorrow? How am I going to survive not being able to touch you? Kiss you? Feel your skin against mine? Fuck, I’m going to miss you.”
I don’t say anything. I can’t. Instead, I wrap my arms around him and hold him close to me. I can’t answer because I’m thinking the same things. I just found him. We just found this, and he has to leave. I know better than to say anything. He’s doing it enough for the both of us. I don’t want to make tomorrow harder for him, or for me. He has a job to do, and if we’re going to be together, it’s my job to stay strong for him.
“I should… uh, go take care of this.” Heat spreads across my cheeks with embarrassment.
“You’re coming back, right? You’re not going home?” His voice is soft almost shy as he asks.
“Yeah, just need to… clean up a little.”
He presses his lips to mine then releases his hold on me. I’m quick to climb out of bed and rush to the bathroom. Once I’m behind the locked door, I exhale, resting my palms on the counter. Looking into the mirror, I realize I’m still naked. Wild hair surrounds my flushed face, and bright eyes stare back at me. I can’t believe I’m here with him, staying the night with him, that we just did that. I fight the urge to cry that he’s leaving in the morning. I don’t want him to go. I want him to stay here so we can spend more time together, get to know each other better. I know what he’s doing is selfless and if I want to be with him, I need to be strong. It’s just so damn hard.
Standing tall, I square my
shoulders and steel my resolve. I can do this. We can do this. Suddenly, I need to be next to him, soak up these last few hours. I rush through cleaning up, hit the light, and blindly feel my way to the bed.
“You okay?” he asks when I slide under the covers.
“Yeah, just a little chilly in here.” It’s not a lie. Of course, I’m naked, so if I had some clothes on, this might not be the case.
“Can I get under there with you?” he asks from his side of the bed. My answer is to lift the covers. It’s dark, but he can sense what it is I’m doing as he stands and pulls up the part of the cover he was on and slides underneath. He moves to the middle of the bed. “Come here, Austyn.”
I move over and rest my head on his bare chest. His strong arms wrap around me. I feel his lips press to the top of my head and my heart swells. I’m a romantic. Growing up watching my parents share the love that they do, I truly do want that. I never wanted to settle for less than, which is why I haven’t dated much. I’ve never let another guy get this close. Not until Slade. He’s the first to treat me as something more. He makes me feel special. The fact that he didn’t press me for more and that he’s willing to hold me, skin to skin and not push or pressure me proves my instincts were right. He’s one of the good guys. The phantom gentleman I was fearful no longer existed.
“What are you thinking about?” he asks.
“You,” I tell him honestly.
“Oh yeah?” He moves his hand lovingly up and down my spine.
“Yeah, you’re unexpected, but I’m glad to have met you.”
“You make it sound like you’re never going to see me again.”
“I’m not here with expectations, Slade.”
“Well, you should be. The first chance I have to get away, this is where I’m coming. To see you. Nothing can keep me away.”
I try to tramp down the excitement his words cause. “We said slow, right? I’m not going to hold you to that because of what we just did. Things change with time.”