Uncle Gary's Campfire Stories: Bayou Zombie Werewolves

by Visada, J. L. M.

  Bill grabbed the rifle, pointed it at the gator’s head and…nothing.

  “Take off the safety you idiot.” Bill snapped.

  James turned the gun over and found the safety. He flipped it off and then took aim.

  *Bang*

  “Aim for the head!”

  “I was aiming for the head!”

  *Bang*

  “That’s the shoulder.”

  *Bang*

  “Dammit, you nearly shot me. Give me the gun! You take the line.”

  Bill handed the .30-06 bolt action over to his friend, and then took the line. The gator wasn’t even trying to get away, and Bill felt much more comfortable with this particular task.

  *Click*

  “What the hell?” James pulled the bolt back. “Why’d you only load three?”

  “I didn’t. I gave it to Tater. He wanted to do it. He never loaded a rifle before.”

  “Okay…well give me some more rounds to load this thing back up.”

  “Umm.” Bill looked embarrassed.

  “What now?” James said angrily.

  “I kind of left the ammo back at your truck.”

  “You what! Why didn’t you say something?”

  Bill shrugged, “I thought you’d be mad, and I figured we’d only need one bullet anyway.”

  “Well we’d only need one bullet if you could shoot for shit. Dammit!” James yelled.

  “So what are we going to do?”

  James thought about it for a moment, then pulled out his knife. “He’s hooked under the jaw. So you pull as hard as you can until his head is as high out of the water as it can get. Then I’ll take my knife and cut his throat. It’ll be messy, but we’ll still have what we came here for.”

  Bill nodded and pulled hard. The alligator’s head rose up, and James cut deeply. The alligator didn’t even flinch. Bill expected the gator to jerk or something, and it’s sudden stillness surprised him. The gator’s scales were hard to cut through, and James had to practically saw his way through the hide. Then entire time he kept expecting a burst of crimson, but instead the blood just sort of seeped out slowly.

  “Damn thing is already dead.” James said after a moment of watching the blood trickle out. “Looks like you did a better job than I thought.”

  It was a backhanded compliment, but Bill still smiled anyway. James wasn’t the kind of man to give anyone a compliment…backhand or otherwise. Both men pulled for all their worth, and the gator flopped into the boat. The tail dangled over the back of the boat into the water. The two men were celebrating when one of the gators started thrashing.

  “That’s the damnedest thing I ever saw.” James said while staring at the gator that continued to splash and roll.

  “What’s it doing?” Bill asked nervously.

  “No clue, but we got our gator. Let’s head home. Whatever is happening with that gator…it ain’t our problem.” James tried to start the engine, but it only sputtered a few seconds before dying. “Shit!”

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Not sure, maybe it’s flooded…or maybe something else.” James tried to start it again, but it didn’t even sputter this time. “Fuck a duck!”

  “Can you fix it?”

  “It might just need a moment.”

  “Should we wake up Tater?”

  “For what? If I wanted spend my time listening to an asshole I’d just fart.” James snapped.

  The two men waited a few more minutes before trying it again. This time the engine sputtered to life. Bill laughed, and just out of curiosity he waved the light one last time out over the gators. The one that had been splashing and rolling was now floating on its back. A large hole in the middle of the gator’s stomach glistened with blood. Its internal organs were barely attached, but floating beside the gator’s body.

  “Damn! What do you think did that?” Bill asked. Just then there was a huge splash behind Bill. He looked in the direction of where he’d heard it, but there were only ripples. “What the hell?”

  “It’s probably another gator or maybe a catfish.” James sneered.

  Bill swept around the boat with his light. All he could see were the eyes of the gator, and a muddy bank.

  “See. Now stop being a pussy and…what’s that?” James pointed.

  Bill swung the light back in the direction James pointed. Something was moving towards them just under the surface. It was coming at them extremely fast. The wake of water it created was almost a foot higher than the water surface. Bill aimed the light right at the movement, and it stopped. The wake disappeared almost as quickly as it began.

  “Deeper…whatever it was it just went dee-“ James’ voice was cutoff in mid-sentence by a splash.

  Bill turned toward his where his friend had been, but there was nothing there. “James? Jimmy? Come on man this ain’t funny.” Bill leaned over the back of the boat, and carefully braced himself against the motor. “James?” Bill pointed the light down at the water. The water was calm. A few bubbles came up. “James get your ass back in this boat and stop playing. It’s too dark for this shit.”

  The water churned for a moment, and James was almost certain he saw a hint of movement just under the water. He leaned a little closer, and James’ hand shot out of the water and grabbed the edge of the boat. His knuckles were white. Then a second hand slowly came up out of the water and grabbed on as well. James was pulling himself up. Bill stood over the man, shining his light down to see into the muddy water. Finally, James’ face appeared just under the surface. His face was clenched tight with strain. He kept pulling until his nose broke the surface. Suddenly, his eyes shot open in terror, and he screamed. Water flooded into his mouth turning it into a loud gurgle that sounded a lot like a child blowing bubbles in his milk. Then his head disappeared into the muddy depths. His hands held on for dear life. Then the back of the boat was yanked down so hard that Bill nearly fell out of the boat.

  Bill was able to regain his balance, and then in a panic he grabbed his friend’s arms and pulled up. Both hands lifted up easily. Then Bill screamed. In each hand he held his friends arms, but they were no longer attached to the man that had been his friend for fifteen years. Bill panicked and flung the arms into the water, and then he looked down just in time to see James’ head, or to be more specific half of his head, floating on the surface of the water. Now he couldn’t even scream. All that came out was a high pitched squeak.

  A partially fur covered skeletal claw rose up slowly, curled around what was left of James’ face. It pulled it down so quickly that the splash of water went all the way up and struck Bill in his open mouth. Bill stood frozen in place. He could only vaguely process what he’d just seen. Bill kept trying to force his hand to reach down and twist the handle so that the boat would race off to safety, but he was paralyzed with fear.

  Something started rising from the water. It was climbing into the boat behind him, and the boat shifted as though something heavy was climbing up from the side. The boat leaned way over to the side, but eventually straightened up. Bill knew that whatever it was, it was right behind him. He could hear water dripping onto the inside of the boat. He started shuffling his feet in order to turn around. Bill didn’t know exactly what was behind him, but he did know that he was about to die. Panic set in with each careful step. A thought crept into his mind that if he leapt into the water he might escape. Then his eyes found the alligators again. Could he swim to the bank before the gators caught him? Could he even get out of the boat before whatever was standing behind him killed him?

  Bill knew he’d only get one chance. If he timed it just right he could be in the water before whatever it was had a chance to react. Then he thought of Tater. He was family. Bill kept turning, and finally began to see the thing that killed James.

  He could see the exposed ribcage healing. Inside lungs were inflating and deflating. Flesh was growing over the exposed bone, and fur grew in almost immediately. He looked into its eyes. They were wolf eyes, and they were hungry.
The creature growled a raspy growl. Its throat still had a long way to go before it healed. Part of its face was missing, and Bill watched in horror as flesh regrew and became the jowls of a very large werewolf.

  Werewolf…there was no other way for Bill’s brain to explain what he was seeing. Terror clawed into his heart, and Bill leapt straight backwards. His eyes found Tater. He was still asleep behind the werewolf. The wolf reached out and grabbed Bill by his belt loop. Bill felt himself jerked back so hard that vertebrae popped. As his face accelerated into the rotten open maw of the werewolf, all Bill could think was the strange thought that he normally had to pay good money for a spinal realignment like that. It was the last thought he’d ever have.

  In the moonlight, Danior bit down on his prey’s flesh, tearing off huge chunks, and then swallowed them down in great gulps. With each bite more of his body healed. Organs went from looking dried and cracked, to shiny and slick with blood. After a few more bites flesh grew over the exposed organs. Fur grew over, leaving no sign of any injuries. Blood dribbled down onto the deck, and once Danior had eaten the body completely, he started licking the blood up from the boat. Finally, he saw Tater.

  The werewolf started to move in closer, careful not to rock the boat and wake up his next food source. Through careful balance he edged in closer and closer. Danior always believed that stalking was almost as good as feeding. It was like foreplay for food. He edged in even closer. His claw moved into position to snatch Tater up by his throat, but unfortunately snagged the plug for the earbuds to Tater’s cellphone. Justin Beiber’s pubescent voice blared out from the tiny device, and startled the werewolf. Danior had never heard anything as horrible as “Baby”, and its effect on him was much like nails on a chalkboard. He leapt backwards and landed in the water with a heavy splash.

  The boat rocked and swayed, but Tater never woke up. He was oblivious to just how close he’d come to being werewolf chow. He just lay there, snoring, and his cellphone kept cycling through songs one by one. The stars were overhead, a full moon lit up the boat, and the werewolf was currently running as far and as fast away from his cellphone as it could. All things considered, if Tater had been awake he’d probably have been thrilled that he was still alive.

  Meanwhile, the alligators stomach shifted. Sometime between Justin Timberlake’s “Rock Your Body” and Lady Gaga’s “Bad Romance” , the gator’s stomach contents started moving back up towards the head. It was slow, but the bulge kept climbing, as though guided by the sound of Tater’s cell phone. It reached the slit in the gator’s throat sometime around the beginning of LMFAO’s “Sexy and I Know It”, and its’ head popped out of the slit in the throat just as they were at the wiggle wiggle part of the song. It was one of the zombies. The time spent inside the gator had rehydrated what was originally a dried out husk. It still couldn’t move very well, and the stomach acid inside the gator had already digested some of the zombie. Part of its face dissolved away leaving exposed bone.

  The zombie followed the music. It had one arm left, and nothing below its bellybutton. Another gator had stolen the lower half, and a third had taken the arm. With the remaining arm it clawed its way out of the gator’s throat and made its way to Tater. It found his foot, and bit down on the ankle. Blood spurted into the creature’s mouth, and then leaked back out of the hole in the side of his face.

  Tater’s eyes shot open, immediately aware of the pain in his leg. He looked down, and saw the rotting upper torso that was gnawing at his ankle. “Motherfucker!” Tater screamed and started kicking at the zombie’s head. The first kick knocked the zombie loose, and the second crunched his nose. It reached up and tried to grab Tater again, but it was so decayed that it couldn’t move fast enough to grab the man whose legs were now kicking it in the face like two pistons. The zombie was strong, but had lost almost all its dexterity and coordination.

  The zombie chased after him, until he’d almost fell out over the front of the boat before making a mad dash around the zombie to the back of the boat. They boat swayed back and forth, and Tater nearly lost his balance. The zombie turned and followed the music. As it got near, Tater slipped past it again. The zombie turned and followed back to the front of the boat. This went on three more times, and then as he was running to the front of the boat he tripped and fell hard. He slid all the way to the front. The zombie was already hurrying after him. Tater scrambled up to his feet and leapt over the zombie, landing butt first on the dead alligator. His cellphone came off his hip and landed in the water. As it floated away playing the New Kids on The Block and Backstreet Boys “Don’t Turn Out the Lights” the zombie pursued it with single minded aggression. It was blind, but by following the music it knew it had gotten food, and so it continued following the sound right off the boat and into the water.

  It took Tater a few minutes before he could think well enough to realize that he was all alone. He searched the water, but he didn’t see anyone. He wanted to cry, but the dull throb in his ankle forced him to focus on his wound. Tater took his shirt off and tied it around his wound. It wasn’t long before there was a red bloom on his shirt from the bite.

  “James! Bill! If you’re out there say something. Please!” Tater then looked over at the motor. He was bleeding pretty badly, and he realized he might just bleed to death if he stayed here. “I’m sorry guys. If you’re out there I’ll be back as soon as I can.” He twisted the throttle, and the boat headed back to the pickup.

  Chapter Nine

  “Yes?” Sarah Mudd answered the phone.

  “It’s Bobby. I need to speak to Colton.” Bobby Mullins’ sounded frantic.

  Sarah screamed for her husband, and a few moments later Sheriff Colton Mudd took the phone from his wife.

  “This better be important Coonass. We’re about to have dinner, and you know how I feel about Sarah’s pot roast.” Colton growled through the phone.

  “I shot him Colt…I blew his damned head apart. You don’t just walk that off.” Bobby sputtered.

  “Wait! You shot someone? Who’d you shoot? Tell me what happened.” Colton snapped.

  “I gave these two guys a ride. They were acting funny, and getting pretty rude. So I pulled my shotgun out and told them to get out.” Bobby sounded panicked, “I thought that would get them to leave, but they just came at me. They chased me around the pickup, and when I tried to drive off…the one guy leapt into the passenger seat and came after me. His face!”

  “What about his face?”

  “It was changing…HE was changing.”

  “Changing how?” Colton asked.

  “You won’t believe me. Hell, I don’t believe me!”

  “Bobby…we’ve been friends since we were kids. If you tell me you saw it then I’ll believe you.” Or at least not laugh in your face. Colton kept that last part to himself.

  “Not about this.”

  Colton pinched his nose as he felt the headache nesting just behind his eyes. “What did you see?”

  “Werewolf…I think it was a werewolf.” Bobby whispered. He actually sounded ashamed that the words were coming out of his mouth.

  “Werewolf? Do you mean like Lon Chaney’s The Wolfman, the werewolves from The Howling, or are we talking Twilight werewolves?” Colton tried to keep from laughing. The whole thing was just silly.

  “Twilight werewolves?”

  “If I get out there and some metrosexual asshole starts showing me his abs…I swear to God, Jesus, and Dale Earnhardt that I will lock everyone up.”

  “Well it wasn’t Twilight. It was more like The Company of Wolves. Except instead of ripping his skin off…he just sort of shed it like a snake.” Bobby sounded way too confident in his answer for Colton’s comfort.

  “If you’re fucking with me you better tell me now, because I swear to God that if this is a joke then I’m going to shoot you in the leg.” Colton grumbled as the scent of pot roast made his stomach growl. “I’ll be over at your house in twenty minutes.”

  “Thanks. I didn’t think anyon
e would believe me.” Bobby sighed in relief.

  “I don’t believe you. I think you freaked out and your mind played tricks on you, but either way I need to go out and make sure there isn’t some dead guy on the side of the road. What happened to the other one?”

  “He punched through my rear window and tried to drag me out while I was driving. He was strong. You know how they say retards have the strength of ten men.”

  “I think that’s an urban legend…and I’m not sure you’re supposed to call them retards anymore?”

  “Well whatever they’re called…he was their king. I hit my breaks, and his arm ripped off. The damn thing was still choking me. The retard king rolled out in front of me and then stood back up. So I ran him over with my pickup.”

  “Stop calling him a retard. Now let me get over there so you can show me where this happened.” Colton hung up and started putting on his uniform. He walked out the door giving a long looked into the kitchen. His wife Sarah was just setting the pot roast on the kitchen table. “If I don’t make it back…I love you.”

  Sarah smiled a million-watt smile, “I love you too.”

  “I was talking to the pot roast.” Colton grinned mischievously. “But you’re pretty okay too.”

  “Smartass!” Sarah laughed, and her gentle blue eyes twinkled. “Oh well, at least I only have to worry about my husband cheating on me with my cooking.”

  “Yep, I’m a one woman man…that likes some pot roast on the side.” Colton laughed and patted his ample belly.

  “Pot roast…kinky.”

  “Oh you have no idea.”

  “I think I do.” Sarah laughed and leaned forward so her husband could get a good look at her cleavage.

  Her double D-cups swayed just over the pot roast, and Colton’s eyes glazed over. He couldn’t decide which mouthwatering vision he wanted to put in his mouth first. The juicy pot roast that was already making his stomach growl, or his wife’s breasts that were making other parts stand up and beg.