A Place of Hope

by Anna Jacobs

  ‘My son was always—’ Chad broke off in shock. ‘The camping image was right. I have a son . . . No, two sons. They’re called—’ He frowned, closing his eyes, desperately trying to hold on to the memory.

  Oh, she felt for him, she really did.

  He groaned. ‘It’s no good. I can’t remember their names. Only their faces.’

  ‘But remembering them at all is another step forward.’

  ‘Yes, but . . .’ He looked at her, just looked.

  He was an attractive man. Very. Naturally a man like him would be married, she thought. Even George had got married and he wasn’t at all attractive.

  Only . . . where was Chad’s wife?

  Once again, Emily had been attracted to a man she couldn’t have. She would never break up a marriage . . . Unless he was divorced.

  He spoke his thoughts aloud. ‘If I have a wife, why hasn’t she been searching for me? Why hasn’t she listed me as a missing person?’

  ‘I can’t imagine.’

  ‘I don’t feel as if I have a wife,’ he offered.

  ‘But you must have had one at some time.’

  ‘I don’t get a good feeling when I think about that.’

  She hated the thought of him going back to another woman. Hated it! From now on, she must control her emotions and keep in mind that when all the fuss had settled down, she’d very likely be left here alone. Well, she’d been alone for a while now, in that sense, knew how to live a perfectly satisfactory single life.

  But this time, she’d been hoping . . .

  Sometimes she wondered what was wrong with her. Why hadn’t she ever been able to find a life partner?

  Chad gave a little shake of the head, as if dismissing some unhappy thoughts, and turned back to his mug of tea, clutching it tightly and staring down into it. ‘We shall just have to wait and see,’ he said at last. ‘And hope for the best.’

  She concentrated on her own mug. She’d wait, yes. And hope. But not hope for too much. Didn’t dare.

  Then she realized she’d used that word again. Hope. Was there hope for them? Please let there be.

  Seven

  Rachel had an easy drive up to Lancashire. No traffic jams, one quick stop for refreshments, and on she went, singing along to the radio when a song came on that she liked, wincing when the broadcast was interrupted for hurtfully loud traffic announcements.

  It felt good to be going away somewhere, whatever the reason. She’d been a bit down in the dumps since her son and his family left for Australia, even though he’d tried to persuade her to follow them later. That had posed, and still did pose, a dreadful dilemma. She didn’t want to leave England and live so far away from all she knew, but oh, she didn’t want to be parted from Tim and his wife Abbie, let alone little Sophie. She missed her granddaughter so much!

  People got excited about emigrating, but what about the families that were broken up by it, the ones who were left behind?

  She didn’t know why she was dwelling on this. Hadn’t she promised herself to accept Tim’s choice? She would, after all, be able to visit them in Australia. One day. If she saved hard. Or got a part-time job. She’d been retrenched and tossed into early retirement unexpectedly. The money she’d received, and the reduced superannuation because she’d worked for fewer years than she expected, wouldn’t cover expensive trips to the other side of the world.

  Her ex would easily be able to afford it, but he probably wouldn’t bother. He had a new family now.

  She pushed those useless regrets to the back of her mind and concentrated on her driving.

  It was late evening when she reached Littleborough. She slowed down to admire some old stone buildings, then followed the satnav’s instructions to Emily’s pub. She didn’t know Lancashire very well, but she intended to explore it while she was here. She really liked the sight of the moors, great curves of land rolling away into the distance. It didn’t overpower you as the French Alps had on her first and only visit there.

  She flexed her hands one after the other as the traffic slowed almost to a halt. She’d be glad to stop driving. It had been a fraught couple of days and it had taken all her energy to cope.

  As she stopped in front of Emily’s new home, she let out an involuntary exclamation of surprise. Oliver had told them it had once been a pub, but it still looked like one, and a seedy, run-down place at that. And it was on its own out here, not in the cosy village she’d pictured.

  Getting out of the car she stopped for a moment to breathe deeply, enjoying the crisp moorland air after being shut in the car for hours. Then she suddenly felt impatient to see her friend, and turned to grab her handbag and one of her bags of food.

  The front door opened and Emily came hurrying out to join her.

  ‘You don’t look too bad, considering you’ve had a hard day’s travelling and need to settle in,’ Rachel decided aloud. ‘You look much happier, that’s for sure.’

  ‘I am. Anyone would be. I’d expected you sooner. There wasn’t a problem, was there?’

  ‘Only George arriving at your place an hour or so after you’d set off.’

  ‘Oh, my goodness! What a narrow escape!’

  ‘I had to wait till he’d left before I dared go out to my car. You should have seen the black looks he threw towards my house.’

  Emily shuddered. ‘He wasn’t supposed to return till tomorrow. Was he furious to find the house locked up?’

  ‘Furious is a mild word. He turned dark red and looked like a volcano about to erupt. And you know what? From the way he looked back at your house, I don’t think he wanted to leave it. Marcia looked disappointed as well.’

  ‘Well, tough. It’s my house and I still can’t believe he moved in like that against my wishes. I hope he’ll stay out of my life from now on. I don’t think even he would have the cheek to turn up here.’

  ‘I wouldn’t put anything past him. Look how he slashed my tyres.’

  ‘It could have been vandals.’

  ‘I’m quite certain it was him. After all, he’d just been threatening me.’

  ‘Let’s forget about the obnoxious George. Come inside. I’m so glad to see you.’

  Rachel grinned as she gestured to the house. ‘Are you sure you’ve enough room to put me up? Or had I better look for a B&B?’

  Emily linked her arm in her friend’s. ‘I still can’t believe a place this large is really mine.’

  Rachel turned to click the remote that locked her car. It might be the only vehicle in a bare, windswept parking area, but better safe than sorry was a good motto for a woman on her own. ‘I’ll come back out for the other boxes and bags in a few minutes. I want to see the house before we do anything else.’

  They stopped in the front area and Rachel said simply, ‘Wow! Your very own bar.’

  ‘No booze behind it, though. Well, I don’t think there is.’

  ‘That can be remedied.’ Rachel felt inside the bag she was carrying and placed a bottle of white wine on the dusty bar. ‘There. Our favourite viognier. If you feel up to it tomorrow, we’ll have a little party, starting with a nice glass of white wine.’ She shivered. ‘We won’t even need a fridge to chill it. Not a very warm day, is it, considering we’re almost into summer now?’

  There was the sound of a car pulling up outside and Rachel felt Emily stiffen. ‘Don’t be nervous. We won’t let anyone cart you away again.’ She went to peep out of the front door and flung it wide open. ‘Anyway, it’s only Oliver.’

  He came in carrying some bags plus a bouquet of flowers, which he presented to Emily with a mock bow. ‘Welcome to your home, madame.’

  For a moment she felt as if the room was filled with light and warmth, then the illusion faded. But still, the flowers made her feel good. ‘Thank you.’ She smiled down at the bouquet.

  ‘Now that’s what I call a nice gesture,’ Rachel said.

  Emily watched him smile at Rachel and her friend smile back, and drew her own conclusions. ‘I’ll have to look for a vase. Come an
d have a cup of coffee, you two. I’ve only got instant and I know you like fancy coffee, Rach, but it’ll be hot and comforting, at least.’

  Chad had already put the kettle and electric heater on, so the sitting room of the flat felt cosy and welcoming. They sat for a few minutes, drinking the coffee, not saying much, then Rachel bounced to her feet and demanded to be shown round.

  Oliver studied Emily and Chad. ‘Let me do the honours. You two should take it easy for a while.’

  When they’d gone, Chad sighed and let his head fall back. ‘He’s right. I’m exhausted.’

  Emily watched him fall asleep, then allowed herself to follow his example. You could push yourself so far, but in the end you simply had to give in to your body’s demand for rest.

  ‘They look so tired and pale,’ Rachel said quietly. ‘Is that for lack of sun, do you think, or for another reason?’

  ‘Lack of sun, I hope. They’ve both been shut away for a few weeks.’

  ‘Are they going to be all right now, do you think?’

  ‘I’ve got them booked in to see a doctor first thing tomorrow morning. She’s a good one, too. I’ll have to pick them up at ten past seven.’

  ‘Ouch!’

  ‘You can either come with us or stay here.’

  ‘I think I’ll stay here and do some cleaning and tidying. I don’t like hanging round, waiting for people, and if Emily’s got you, she’ll be all right. Where am I sleeping?’

  ‘You can pick your own room.’ He showed her the first-floor bedrooms. ‘Chad will be sleeping downstairs because Emily’s a bit nervous.’

  ‘Hmm.’ Rachel inspected the rooms, then chose one whose door had a lock on it. ‘I feel a bit jumpy too, after all that’s been going on.’ She rattled the door. ‘That’s nice and solid, though.’

  ‘Perhaps I should come and sleep here, too?’ He was fiddling with the curtain as he added, ‘I don’t want to be left out now that I’ve been involved in the Great Escape.’

  ‘Perhaps you should stay.’ She looked at him speculatively. She hadn’t met a guy she fancied for a while. Oliver didn’t hit you in the eyes as what she called a ‘possible’, because he wasn’t sexy looking, but his kindness and enthusiastic approach to life grew on you quickly. He had a particularly warm smile. She was a sucker for smiles, and his was getting to her.

  Oliver had clearly loved his wife.

  She liked that about him, too.

  Oh, she was being very fanciful. He probably had a lady friend already. There was a shortage of men in her age group.

  In the morning, Emily woke early, lying in bed listening to birds calling, wondering where she was. Sunlight poured round the edges of the faded curtains and her eyes settled dreamily on its brightness.

  Then she remembered everything in a sudden rush of images. That had been the pattern ever since she came out of the coma. She woke each morning to a brief disorientation, then too much information cascaded into her brain.

  She decided to have a quick shower and make herself a cup of tea before they left. Maybe some toast, too. She was hungry, something that hadn’t often happened in hospital.

  She chose a blue denim skirt, rather than jeans. It was one of her favourites, her lucky skirt, she always thought. With it she wore a white T-shirt and a darker blue cardigan. She looked at herself in the mirror. She normally kept herself in pretty good shape for a woman of her age, because she was fortunate and had never had a problem with weight. Now she’d have to work on getting her fitness back.

  Once she was dressed, she went into the kitchen to find Chad yawning as he waited for the kettle to boil.

  ‘You can shower in the bathroom in the flat, if you like.’

  ‘Thanks. I’ll do that in a minute.’ He poured the boiling water into their mugs and began to jiggle the teabags, staring blindly into space and swirling the bags around for far too long till she took them from his hands.

  He watched her finish making the tea, then said in a rush, ‘I’m not looking forward to seeing another doctor. Are you?’

  She shuddered. ‘Not at all. But if Oliver vouches for this one, she must be all right, don’t you think?’

  ‘I expect so. He’s a great guy, Oliver. I really like him.’

  ‘I do too. Do you want something to eat before we leave or aren’t you hungry yet?’

  ‘I wouldn’t mind a piece of toast.’

  Emily got out the bread. ‘We must go shopping after we’ve seen the doctor. It feels strange to have nearly empty cupboards. Thank heavens for the stuff Rach brought.’

  ‘Maybe next week I can get some money from social security until I remember who I am, then I can pay you something at least.’

  ‘Don’t do that. Not yet, anyway. You’ll have to jump through all kinds of hoops and until you’re certain where you stand . . . Well, better safe than sorry. Your memory is returning, even if only in fragments. I’m sure it won’t be long before you can access your own money. In the meantime, I have plenty, truly I do. I’ll lend you some.’

  ‘I hate borrowing from you.’

  ‘I don’t hate lending it to you.’ Her eyes met his and again there was that warmth between them.

  ‘Well, we’ll keep a careful account of everything and I will pay you back as soon as I can, Emily, I promise.’

  ‘I know. Now, how about you grab that shower?’

  Before they left, Emily went upstairs to wake Rachel, but had to wait for her friend to unlock the bedroom door.

  Rachel got back into bed and took the cup of coffee Emily had brought her. ‘Thanks for this.’ She took a big slurp. ‘I’m not good in the early mornings. Sorry. I’ll get myself going in a minute.’

  ‘It’s all right. You don’t have to go anywhere.’ She heard a car and went to look out of the window. ‘Oliver’s here. Go back to sleep if you want. Long drives can tire you out. We’ll lock up as we go.’

  Emily ran lightly down the stairs, feeling much better physically this morning. As she went out to join Oliver and Chad, she paused for a moment to look up at the moors.

  ‘It’s beautiful here,’ Chad said quietly as she got into the car.

  Oliver smiled over his shoulder. ‘I wouldn’t live anywhere else. People seem to think Lancashire is only made up of grimy industrial towns but this Pennine territory that it shares with Yorkshire has its own beauty. Once you two are fitter, I’ll take you walking across the moors, if you like.’

  ‘Love to.’

  He turned round and drove off.

  His two passengers were quiet, enjoying the scenery.

  Dr Jean Allerton was grey-haired and brisk. Oliver went in with them to explain the situation they’d had to escape from.

  She looked increasingly angry as the tale unfolded, but didn’t comment except to say, ‘You must lay a complaint. We can’t let that sort of abuse continue.’

  ‘Let’s wait a while before we take action,’ Oliver pleaded. ‘My clients need time to get over their experience. We don’t want people haranguing them to prove their case yet. Chad is starting to remember some details now, but if he gets stressed, that might stop.’

  ‘We’ll see. Perhaps you gentlemen will wait outside while I examine Ms Mattison?’ She turned to Emily. ‘You understand that I can only give you a quick check-up at this stage.’

  ‘That’s all right. I’m recovering well, physically and mentally, so I don’t think I need any treatment other than rest and lack of stress.’ She gave a wry smile. ‘More than anything, I need you to confirm that I don’t have Alzheimer’s.’

  ‘Not easy to give a hundred per cent assurance, but you certainly don’t seem to have that slightly bewildered look.’

  ‘I was in a coma after a fall down some stairs, though I don’t remember that. But I’m not confused about anything that’s happened since, or about my life before the fall. I just . . . don’t want anyone to lock me up again. That’s what worries me most, being helpless and in someone else’s power.’

  ‘Would they do that to you again
, do you think? Surely it was all a terrible mistake?’

  ‘I don’t think it was a mistake. I’m quite sure it was deliberately done.’ She explained some of the tricks played on her to make her look forgetful. ‘My nephew George would lock me away again like a shot.’

  ‘What you do about your nephew is not my concern, but it sounds as though you have grounds for a formal complaint about the way you were treated by the health system.’

  ‘I doubt I could prove it’d been done on purpose, and if I did complain, my nephew’s part in it would come out. That’d upset my sister, who is very frail. The main thing is, thanks to Oliver, I’m out and living my own life again.’

  ‘Others may still be locked away. You owe it to them to make some sort of complaint.’

  She sagged in her chair. ‘I hadn’t thought of that. I’ll have to give it some thought.’

  She let the doctor take her blood pressure and check her physically, answered questions and when it was all over, had a question of her own, the most important question of all. ‘Do you think I seem . . . all right mentally? I mean, I feel right, but . . .’

  The doctor patted her arm. ‘You seem perfectly compos mentis to me, Emily, and I’m sure you’ll soon regain your former fitness, but try to do that gradually. If you have any health worries at all, any sudden changes in what you can or can’t do, come and see me, or go to the A&E at a hospital.’

  ‘What if George . . . comes after me?’

  ‘Get in touch with me straight away. We’ll sign you up at the practice, so that I’m officially your doctor from now on. And if there’s any further trouble, we’ll bring in a geriatric expert I know, who specializes in dementia.’

  When the doctor had finished with her, Emily went to sit with Oliver while Chad went in for his check-up. She got so lost in her own thoughts that Oliver’s voice made her jump.

  ‘Sorry. Didn’t mean to startle you. Jean didn’t find anything wrong with you, did she? You look worried.’

  ‘About George. Or Sister Pauline. Or both of them. They might come after me and Chad.’