The Miracle Baby Box Set: Volume One: Books 1 - 4

by Hamel, B. B.

  I manage to walk away, though, and head into work. I fall back into that routine, although the look on Ryan’s face never leaves me. It’s haunting and sad, but it also makes me feel a little bit better. It means he didn’t want to leave me, either. It means maybe he’s starting to bond with me too.

  I know I’ll never be his real mother. I’ll never be Harper for him. But I hope one day he’ll care about me the same way that I’m starting to really care about him.

  Work drags on, almost like nothing changed since I last left it a month ago. I have the same old problems, although they’re all new faces. Being a nurse is difficult and thankless, but at least my shifts are all going to be pretty decent now that I have Ryan. No more overnight slog-fests for me, which I guess is one thing I can be thankful for.

  I manage to get through the day relatively unscathed. I’m pretty exhausted when I leave, but I know I don’t have time to be tired. The selfish, old part of me resents Ryan in this moment, and I quickly hide myself as I pull into the parking lot of the daycare. I glide my car into an empty spot and look into my rearview mirror, my own eyes reflected back at me.

  “You’re a mother now,” I say. “You don’t have time for self-pity or weakness.”

  I take a deep breath and let it out. The old me would be angry that I have to do something after work. The old me would want to go right home, collapse onto the couch, and stare dumbly at the television for at least an hour or two before I could bring myself to get something to eat. The old me was lazy, but I’m not that anymore.

  I’m a mother now and I better start acting like it.

  As I look away from the rearview mirror, I notice something move toward the back of my car. I open my door and start as a person steps toward me.

  “What the fuck?” I say, shocked.

  “Sorry.” His response is earnest and he steps further away from the car. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

  I step out, feeling slightly embarrassed. I assume it’s the person coming for the car next to mine, but when I get a look at him, my heart stops.

  It’s the guy, the one that claims to be Ryan’s father.

  I stare at him, my mouth hanging open. He’s taller than I remembered, with broad shoulders, dark hair, and startling light eyes. His smirk itches something deep inside my gut, some mix of intense, animal lust and revulsion for how cocky he is. I want to reach out and slap him, but I also want him to reach out and slap me back. It’s a little confusing and weird.

  “Sorry,” he says again. “I know this is…”

  “Are you following me?” I ask him.

  He shakes his head, pauses, and then sighs. “Yeah.”

  “What the hell?” I back away from him, a sudden stab of fear jolting through me.

  “It’s not like that,” he says, holding up his hands. “Please, just listen.”

  “You’re the guy from a month ago. Look, I don’t know where Ryan is, so don’t bother, okay?”

  He gives me a little smile. “That’s not true.”

  I stare back at him, not willing to give an inch.

  He grins even more. “Okay, listen. What I told you is true. I am Ryan’s father. Harper and I were together for a while, but she disappeared and stole my baby away from me just a few months after he was born. I’ve been looking for him for years now, and I only found him because of that obituary.”

  I bite my lip, watching him. It’s totally plausible. Harper went off the map for a while there, not even on social media or anything like that. Then again, I don’t recognize this guy from any of her posts from back when she was pregnant, so I don’t know if I can believe this story.

  “What do you want from me?” I ask him.

  “I want to see my son.”

  I stare, my fear slowly being replaced with anger. I’m only just becoming attached to this boy, starting to think of him as my own son, starting to bond with him. And this strange guy thinks he can just show up and take him?

  I can’t be sure he’s not working with the Gallo family. He did mention Enzo’s name when I first met him, and this could all be some elaborate bullshit cooked up by their twisted mafia to steal Ryan away from me. I know they want him, and I know they’ll do anything to get him.

  “He’s not your son,” I say. “Now please, leave before I call the cops.”

  His smile falters. “Leah, listen. I’m not lying to you.”

  “Yeah?” I ask him. “Prove that he’s your son.”

  He nods and pull out his phone. He shows me a picture of an infant, clearly a newborn. It’s a selfie, his smiling face in the frame, and…. The baby could be Ryan, but it’s really impossible to say for sure.

  “That doesn’t prove anything,” I say to him.

  He frowns, flips to a new picture. Same baby, a little bit older, although he’s not in the frame this time.

  I shake my head and step away. “Look, I don’t know you, okay? And honestly, I don’t trust you.”

  He nods a little. “I don’t blame you.” He puts his phone away. “How is he?”

  I hesitate. “He’s okay,” I say. “He’s a quiet boy. But he’s good.”

  He smiles at that and nods. “Okay. Good. I just… please, can you let me see him? What’s the harm in that?”

  “I don’t know you,” I repeat, “and Harper’s psycho family is trying to… well, they’re psychos, so let’s leave it at that.”

  He narrows his eyes. “Trying to do what, exactly?”

  I shake my head, take a deep breath, and brush past him. I expect him to grab my wrist, and I’m all ready to scream, but he doesn’t touch me. Instead, he follows in step with me.

  “Just go away, okay? Seriously, I’m going to call the cops.”

  “Just tell me what Harper’s family wants,” he says. “I know what they are.”

  I glance at him. “You can probably guess.”

  “Honestly, I have no clue what they’d want with a little kid.”

  I clench my jaw. “They’re a crime family. They want to keep it all in the family.”

  I watch realization dawn. “They… want him? To raise him in the family?”

  “Bingo,” I say. He looks genuinely shocked, but I don’t trust it. I don’t know if it’s real or if he’s just an actor, and if he was hired by the Gallos, he’s probably the best at whatever it is he does. Steal children, I guess.

  “Look, seriously, I didn’t know anything about that until right now.”

  “I guess you better back off then. Don’t want to piss off the Gallo family.”

  “Fuck them,” he says, and his tone surprises me.

  I stop walking and look at him. “Are you stupid?”

  “Yeah,” he says, his eyes intense. “I am pretty fucking stupid.”

  I stand there and for a second, I want to reach out and touch his handsome face. I can see real anger and rage in his eyes, but it’s not directed toward me. He’s so angry with the Gallos that it honestly surprises me. He could still be working for them, but this…

  I shake my head. “Look, I don’t know if I trust you, okay?” He goes to say something, but I talk over him. “But I’m willing to hear your story. Meet me at the Continental on Second and Walnut tomorrow at noon, okay? I’ll go there for lunch, and we can talk.”

  He nods and stops following me, which makes me feel a lot better. I reach the front door and turn back to look at him.

  “I’ll see you there, Leah,” he says.

  “What’s your name again?” I ask.

  “Connor.” He grins. “It’s nice to meet you. Harper said good things.”

  “Yeah, I bet. Don’t be out here when I leave, okay?”

  “Okay,” he says.

  “Seriously.”

  “I know.” His grins get bigger. “You’ll call the cops.”

  “Damn right.” I can’t help but smile a little bit.

  “See you tomorrow.” He nods and turns, walking away.

  I watch him go for a second. There’s something about him that
I can’t really place. His story seems plausible, but how did he get my address to begin with? Did Enzo give it to him? What’s his relationship to the Gallo family if he’s not working with them?

  I have a million questions about this guy, but I can’t afford to get distracted. I have to pick up Ryan, make the two of us dinner, and try to get him to bed on time. I’m not really done working. Actually, I’ll never really be done working again, but that’s okay.

  I’m this little boy’s mother now, and I need to be careful. I can’t just give in to every single incredibly handsome man that shows up to pretend to be Ryan’s father. Maybe Connor is who he says he is, but I’m going to need some proof before I actually let my son anywhere near that guy.

  I head inside, trying to put it out of my mind, ready to be a mother again.

  5

  Connor

  Harper used to spend hours talking about the Gallo crime family. After her rants, I’d have to calm her down, holding her while she sobbed. To say that she had an abusive, fucked-up childhood would be putting it fucking mildly.

  The Gallos ruined her, exposed her to violence and sex and vices at a young age, all to groom her for the family. She was supposed to become one of them, but instead of getting involved in the mafia, she ran away. After a while, she found me, but she never got rid of her demons. That’s why I think she fell into addiction. She was escaping whatever the Gallo bastards did to her.

  I’ve always hated them. I never really had to interact with them, though. Enzo is the only one that Harper could even stand, and so he was her only point of contact. I have his number only because Harper couldn’t stand having it in her own phone, but she wanted to have it handy, just in case. I didn’t really understand that back then, but now I think I do, at least a little bit. Enzo’s number was her last connection to her family, and as fucked up and awful as they are, they’re still family. People need family.

  Anger flows through me like hot lava when I leave the daycare place. I could head back to the apartment I’ve been renting, but I decide against it. I know I need to go back to job hunting, since I’m starting to run low on savings, but I can’t seem to calm myself down enough to be rational right now.

  The fucking Gallo family wants my son. I’ve seen what those bastards can do to a person, and I won’t let them have him. Leah seems like she has her shit together and wants to protect Ryan, but I don’t know how long she can possibly resist them. She’s all alone, clearly overwhelmed by her new role.

  I hate to admit it, but I’ve been following her. She was my only lead, after all. It took me about a week to realize that she’d adopted Ryan, and another week to decide to hold off on confronting her. I wanted to rush in there, steal back my son, and disappear into the night, but I couldn’t bring myself to do to Leah what Harper did to me. I know how that feels, I know that deep, broken ache, and I won’t subject Leah to it.

  She’s doing a good job, as much as I hate to admit it. I mean, I don’t know what they’re like in the apartment, but they seem good together when they go out into the world. I followed them to the park once and watched from a distance, like a total fucking creep. It took all my willpower not to approach them, but I knew she’d freak out and call the cops.

  I decided to approach her at the daycare place for two reasons. First, I wanted her to know who I am and to ask if she’d let me see my son. And second, and maybe more importantly, I wanted her to know that I know, and I wanted to apologize for following her. Maybe a stupid thing, but I couldn’t help myself.

  Because the truth is, the more I watched her, the more interested I became. And now I can’t stop thinking about her, just like I can’t stop thinking about my son.

  Which brings me back to the Gallos, and why I’m stalking through the streets of Philly as the sun’s setting, anger seething through me. I keep thinking about those rants Harper went on, and I keep remembering one particular detail, a bar she said they used to all gather at. It’s a place called Sleepless, not exactly the name you’d imagine for a mafia bar, but she said it was their usual hangout.

  I don’t know how, but I find myself in a cab, heading into South Philly. The cab drops me off in front of a drab little building, shoved in between two row houses, with a sign out front. It’s weathered and peeling and the place doesn’t look open. I’m about to leave when a guy comes out the doors, glances at me, and walks the other way.

  I take a breath and walk over to the doors, pull them open, and head inside.

  Sleepless looks just like Harper described it. Old guys sit at the bar, nursing their alcohol. The place is mostly empty, though, and everyone glances at me as I head over to the bar. The guy pouring drinks is heavy in the middle, smoking a cigarette and cleaning a glass. He comes over to me with a frown.

  “Need something?” he asks.

  I take a breath and for a second, I think about turning around. I could just leave. I know this is stupid. I’m angry and being completely fucking irrational, but I hate the Gallos for what they did to Harper, and I hate them even more for what they want to do to my son.

  “I want to see Enzo Gallo,” I say to the bartender. “He coming in tonight?”

  The bartender stares at me, clearly surprised, before getting himself together. “Who?” he asks. “Never heard of him.”

  I laugh a little. “Don’t fucking lie to me. Is he coming in or what?”

  The bartender waits a second and shrugs, dropping the act. “Wait here,” he says, and disappears into the back.

  My pulse jumps and fear threatens to roll through me, but I push it away. They want to take my boy and ruin him the same way they ruined Harper. I’m not going to let them. Even if I hate Harper and fell out of love with her a long, long time ago, even before Ryan was born, I still despise them. Nobody should be hurt the way she was hurt.

  The bartender comes back a minute later followed by two guys. One of them is a fat man, almost slovenly, with a gut spilling out from under his shirt. The other one’s short and muscular with squinty eyes and a dark baseball cap pulled low.

  “You lookin’ for Enzo?” the fat man asks me.

  I nod at him. “You know where he is?”

  The guy smiles at me, but I can tell the friendliness is masking danger. “Sure, I know. Come with us, yeah? I’ll take you to him.”

  I know I shouldn’t go, but I’m too angry, or maybe too stupid. I get up and nod. “Lead the way.”

  “Yeah, okay,” the fat guy says. I follow them through the back of the bar, past a little kitchen, and into a back room. He takes me through another hallway and out a back door. We’re in an alley behind the building, and the two guys face me.

  I know I should strike first, but I don’t get the chance. The fat guy surprises me, lashing out faster than I thought he could, catching me with a fist to my gut. I stumble back as the shorter guy knees me in the jaw and throws me to the ground.

  “Why the fuck would you come in there and say that name?” the fat guy says. “Are you fucking suicidal?”

  I can only grunt in response. I might be, or maybe I just am so angry I wanted an excuse to hit or get hit. I guess it’s the latter for me right now.

  “He’s stupid,” the short guy says, grinning.

  “Who are you?” the fat man asks.

  “Connor,” I grunt, getting up to my knees, breathing deep. “He knows me.”

  “He don’t know shit,” the short guy says and kicks me in the back, knocking me forward.

  The fat guy sighs. “Serious, Freddy He doesn’t know shit? Enzo knows plenty.” He shakes his head, heavy jowls flopping. “Just kick his ass and be done with it, okay?”

  “Sure, boss,” the short guy says.

  He kicks me again and again, knocking me to the ground. His instep connects with my jaw and I can taste warm blood on my tongue. The guy beats the shit out of me, and when he’s done, he steps away.

  “Now, you ever gonna come back here?” the fat guy asks.

  “No,” I grunt, although I thin
k that’s a lie.

  “Good. I don’t know what you owe Enzo, but stay away, you stupid fucking cunt.” The fat guy shakes his head. “Come on, Freddy.”

  The two men disappear back inside, leaving me alone in the alley.

  It takes me a little while but eventually I pull myself up against the wall, leaning my back against it. I hurt all fucking over, but I’m not dead, and I don’t think they broke anything.

  I gather myself, staring up at the sky through the gap in the buildings. I don’t know why the fuck I came out here. I don’t know what I expected. In my mind, I was going to confront Enzo, get him to back off my son, but of course that wouldn’t have happened.

  No, I knew that was a stupid daydream. I knew that I was going to get into a fight. I wanted to try and get my hands dirty, but fucking hell, what a stupid, suicidal thing to do.

  I’m a fucking mess, I realize with a grin. Two years of frantically searching for my son has left me pretty fucked up.

  I sigh and slowly stand up, groaning against the pain. I need to get my shit together if I’m going to have any chance of getting Ryan. I’m so close to him, so fucking close, and now’s not the time to ruin my chances. I have to show Leah that I’m his real father and that I’m worthy of getting him back.

  As I limp back out to the street, wincing the whole way, I realize that I’m in worse shape than I realized. I don’t have the money for a hospital trip right now, and I don’t know anyone in this damn fucking city.

  Except…

  I groan again as I flag a cab and get into the back. I give him the address and we head out to my second stupid idea of the night, although this one is borne of desperation instead of some insane suicidal rage.

  6

  Leah

  I get through dinnertime with Ryan, and for once it actually goes smoothly. I’m starting to get a feel for how he likes to operate. He loves broccoli for some reason, so I always make him some, but otherwise he’ll only eat chicken nuggets. I’m working on getting him to eat other things, but it’s going pretty slow.