Lord, Change My Attitude: Before It's Too Late
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2. Am I reaping the consequences in my relationship with God? Have you realized reading this chapter that your heart has been like a wilderness because your life has the undeniable symptoms of rebellion? Could you prove your persistent rebellion with specific stories from your life? Those memories are God’s gift to help you put off that attitude. Let the weight of the garbage that our rebellion creates motivate us to put it off.
3. Am I willing to repent? Again, the key in all of this is a willingness to repent. A recognition of where your sin has taken you and a free admission of responsibility is where the transformation always begins. Agree it is sin, and tell God wish to turn from it. He will quickly grant His forgiveness. When the vertical work is done, it’s time to get to work on the horizontal. In fact, doing the work with God sincerely automatically produces a desire to make things right with the people our rebellion has affected. The relationships God brought to your mind above need healing. In most cases, that will have to start when you confess and ask for forgiveness. I know that will be hard for you, but it will help you entrench your decision to go in a new direction.
Take some time to read the next chapter as you prepare for those conversations, because you need to have a clear understanding of submission as you approach the authorities that God has placed in your life.
Look Up
Lord, I understand that rebellion is easy; humility and submission are very hard. I want to take the hard way because it’s the best way, and it’s Your way. Lord, please forgive all of my rationalizations.
In the relationships where I’m wrong, Lord, bring the face of that person to mind in this moment that I might acknowledge my sin and turn from it. Especially in my church, Lord, if I’ve resisted the counsel of a leader or made some wrong decisions and pulled back, or even participated in rebellious conversations, forgive me. Create in me a clean, submissive heart, oh, God! Teach me, Lord, what joy You have in humility and gracious submissive attitudes.
Lord, as I read the next chapter on submission, help me put off this heavy load of rebellion and put on the light load of submission. I believe that this is the road to joy and peace, and I choose to pursue it for Your glory, in Jesus’ name. Amen.
CHAPTER 10:
...WITH AN ATTITUDE OF SUBMISSION
1 PETER 2:13–25
SAY IT IN A SENTENCE:
Submission, when properly understood and applied, replaces the pain and strife of rebellion and greatly increases human happiness.
We’re all natural-born rebels, so we have a built-in resistance to submission. On top of that, submission has been hijacked by some selfish-minded, even cruel, authoritarians who have twisted and distorted the truth for their own purposes. Submission has a terrible reputation right now, so it’s hard to get even sincere people to consider it seriously.
In the next few pages, open your mind in a fresh new way and think, “Well, maybe what I’ve heard about submission isn’t really what God’s Word says. Maybe there is more treasure to be discovered in that word submission that I ever thought.” We don’t want to abandon a subject that’s in God’s Word simply because it’s been misunderstood and misused. If you read on with an open mind, you will see that submission, when properly understood and applied, replaces the pain and strife of rebellion and greatly increases human happiness.
One crucial truth to learn before we get into our main text in 1 Peter 2:
Submission is not just for a few people.
Romans 13:1 makes it very clear that “every person is to be in subjection to the governing authorities . . . established by God.” Every single believer is to be practicing, on a regular basis, the principle of submission. It’s not just for children; it’s also for parents. It’s not just for church members; it’s for pastors. It’s for everyone. In fact, Ephesians 5:21 says, “Be subject to one another in the fear of Christ.” So before we’re ever asking wives, children, employees, or church members to submit, we’re to be submissive—all of us—to one another. The apostle Peter gave five principles on submission in his first epistle. Thefive truths in 1 Peter 2:13–25 will guide and encourage you as you replace a rebellious attitude with a submissive one. It’s the final step in putting off wilderness attitudes. You’ve done well to make it this far, so let’s finish the task.
PRINCIPLE ONE: SUBMISSION IS DUTY TO GOD
First, submission is duty to God. That’s really the focus point: God is the One to whom we’re submitting. As verses 13 and 14 say, “Submit yourselves for the Lord’s sake to every human institution, whether to a king as the one in authority, or to governors as sent by him.”
Submit is a military term that means “to place yourself in order under established authority.” It means “to operate within the chain of command.” Notice the word yourselves in verse 13. You might circle that if you’re looking carefully at your own Bible. No one is to force you to submit; God’s Word says “submit yourselves.”
Don’t miss the principle Peter was applying: Forced submission from the top down is not taught anywhere in the Bible. Nowhere do we see the person in authority demanding, “You submit to me!” The person in authority does not command submission. A leader receives that from those under his or her authority. That leader is called to win the favor of those who are under him through serving and selflessness. That’s servant leadership.
Submission is a choice—not top down, but bottom up.
If you’re in a role where you need to submit, that’s a choice of heart that God asks you to willingly make, for His sake. Husbands are not to be demanding that their wives submit. Pastors are not to be demanding that their people submit but lovingly serving and giving themselves to them. A godly response to that servant leadership is the choice of submission.
You ask, “Well, who exactly is supposed to be doing the submitting? Who exactly am I supposed to be under?” Actually, it’s quite a list. Let’s skim through the end of 1 Peter 2 and into 1 Peter 3. Verses 13 and 14 say we are to submit “to every human institution, whether to a king as the one in authority, or to governors as sent by [the king]” (and ultimately sent by the King of Kings). Verse 17 tells us to “honor all people.” Verse 18 says, “Servants, be submissive to your masters.” The modern context of that is the marketplace. Do what your boss asks or tells you to do, even if he’s not a very good boss.
Further on, 1 Peter 3:1 says, “In the same way . . .” In what way? In the same submissive way that we’ve been talking about. Concerning the home, Peter writes, “In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands.” Now men seem to get that verse down but then they miss verse 7, which says, “You husbands in the same way ...” In what way? In the submissive way that’s being talked about:
“In the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way.” Verse 8 sums up the thought, “All of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit.” In a word, submissive— finding your place of humility and cooperation under the influence of others.
But notice the key phrase back in 2:13, “Submit yourselves for the Lord’s sake to every human institution.” We submit for the Lord’s sake. Our true citizenship is in heaven, but God is trying to get some things done in this world. Everyone who resists the established authorities is resisting God. Everyone who submits to the established authorities—whether they’re right or wrong; whether one agrees or not—is assisting with what God is trying to accomplishn this world.
The problem is with that “for the Lord’s sake.” I don’t think I’ve met a Christian who, if Jesus Christ were to walk up and to stand before him in all of His glory and ask, “Could you do this for Me?” would hesitate. He would say, “Not a problem. Let me get that done right now. Let me spend the rest of my life getting that done for You!”
The problem is that it’s not the Lord we see. He’s behind the scenes. The ones we see—our boss, our parents, our elders—are humans. They’re frail, not perfect. So we use the imperfections of human authorities to dismiss our respons
ibility to be submissive. Our attitude is not right, and God doesn’t bless it. That’s why this text says, “Submit for the Lord’s sake.”
We see the speed limits posted and think how unfair they are. We conclude, “Well, the police don’t even obey the speed limits. When I drive the speed limit, I have police cars passing me. They don’t obey the speed limits, so I’m not going to obey them, either!” As my wife often reminds me, that excuse doesn’t work, especially with officers who have pulled me over. We are to submit, not because of the people we see with all of their inconsistencies, but for the Lord’s sake.
Your boss seems unfair and demanding. Maybe she’s easy on herself and hard on you. She leaves early, but she expects you to work late. You know that’s not right. So you decide, “Once she’s gone, I’m going to leave, too. I’m going to take matters into my own hands. I’m not going to be submissive.” That’s a mistake, because the One whom you’re really refusing to submit to is not your boss, but the Lord. You’re saying, “God, I won’t do what You want me to do.” That’s a very bad decision. We submit for the Lord’s sake, not the boss’s.
PRINCIPLE TWO : SUBMISSION IS PROTECTION BY GOD
Here’s the second principle: Submission is protection by God. Notice verse 14: These “governors [are] sent . . . for the punishment of evildoers and the praise of those who do right.” What a phenomenal statement about our judicial system! If only our government would turn to God’s Word, how much they could understand! What is the purpose of a judicial system? The Scripture indicates it is to punish wrongdoers and honor “those who do right.” Did you know that the escalating crime in our society over the last fifty years is almost directly related to the decision our government made to move away from a punitive judicial system and toward a rehabilitative judicial system? Instead of seeing criminals as wrongdoers who should be punished, we now see them as sick people who need help. Of course, criminals should be helped and treated with respect, but above all, God’s Word says they are to serve time for their crimes.
Part of God’s purpose for authority is to “praise . . . those who do right.” Blessing and favor come to the person who lives in submission. Why? “For such is the will of God” (verse 15). God’s will is for us to display lives of submission, not of rebellion against authority. Do you think God isn’t watching? He is. When recognized authority makes a decision and you don’t like the choices that they’re making, God is very aware of how you respond. God’s will is “that by doing right you may silence the ignorance of foolish men” (verse 15). Yes,
People in authority can be foolish. But God’s desired response from us is “doing right.”
Are you in a situation where you’re being unfairly treated? Do right and silence the ignorance of foolish men. That word silence actually means to muzzle. You say, “There are some people I would love to muzzle.” Great! God’s all for putting a muzzle on them. But you have to know how to get that done. It’s by doing right, trusting God, waiting upon Him, and living a life of biblical submission.
We are to “do right” no matter what.
-- Are you struggling with injustice? Do right and silence the ignorance of foolish men.
-- Have you been passed over for a promotion at work, something you deserved and should have gotten? You’re angry about it. It’s not right and it’s so political. What should you do? Do right and silence the ignorance of foolish men.
-- Has someone turned against you in a relationship and injured you? Do right and silence the ignorance of foolish men.
-- Have you experienced a marriage breakdown and people think they understand what happened? Even though you know what really happened, maybe people have harsh opinions of you, and now you’re reaping the consequences of all of that. You say, “How do I get out of this? I have to defend myself!” Do what’s right and silence the ignorance of foolish men. Whether you’ve been maligned or rejected or ignored, do right and silence the ignorance of foolish men. As I explained in the last chapter, submission to authority is like having an umbrella. When we choose to submit, what we’re really choosing to do is to put ourselves under God’s protection. That is a wonderful place to live your life. You might feel like there are some bad things that are falling, but submission is a covering. It’s your place of protection. When you get out from under that, you are very vulnerable. The promises of God do not extend to you when you choose to live as a rebel. However, when you choose to live under the umbrella of God’s protection by submitting to His plans and doing what’s right, all the promises and blessings of God are yours in abundance.
The choice between submission and rebellion affects every part of life. Think about this little list of contrasts:
Protection
Submission
Humility
Love (“You before me”)
Waiting on God
Trust and obey
Danger
Rebellion
Pride
My rights
Acting on my own
Doubt and disobey
Turn for a moment to 1 Peter 5. The people to whom Peter was writing were suffering Christians in the early church. They were being very harshly treated, more than most of us have ever experienced. So submission to authority comes up quite often in 1 Peter. First Peter 5:5 says, “You younger men, likewise, be subject to your elders; and all of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, for God is opposed to the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” That is a phenomenal truth: God is opposed to the proud. In this context, the proud would be the unsubmissive.
Why do we get bent and rebellious? Because there is someone in control and we’re not. There are things that we want to happen and they’re not happening. So we get rebellious and say, “I’m going to make it happen. I’m going to get what I deserve, and you’re not going to stop me!”
That’s rebellion. But here’s the underlying problem: You’re too focused on the human authority. Behind that person is God, and if you pridefully resist that person’s authority, God Himself will oppose you. He’s going to make sure that attitude of rebellion never takes you to a good place. Bottom line: God’s team always wins.
If you submit to God’s established authority, God is on your team, but if you rebel, He joins the other team.
When He’s with the other team, you will lose for sure. It’s pretty clear, isn’t it? God is opposed to the proud. He gives grace to the humble. “Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time” (1 Peter 5:6).
But you say, “You don’t see my situation. What’s happening to me is so unjust. And the way I’m being treated and the opportunity I’m being given and the place where I am being ranked is not fair! It’s not right!” The answer: “Humble yourself under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time.” Clawing your way to some position of success or opportunity may seem appealing, but it is far more exciting to wait and trust God and see Him put you in that place. Then you know that He wanted you there. He can get you there and keep you there.
Maybe you’re feeling it will be so hard to wait on God, and you are right. Waiting is very hard.
That’s why verse 7 is here, “Casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.” You say, “But I worry. What if He doesn’t come through?” Cast your anxiety upon Him. “But I’ve worked so hard, and I’m so discouraged.” Cast all your anxiety upon Him. Get before the Lord on your knees and lay this matter before the throne of grace. Then wait upon and trust Him. He will not disappoint you. Submission is protection by God.
PRINCIPLE THREE: SUBMISSION HAS LIMITS UNDER GOD
You say, “Wow, this submission thing is getting radical. Are there any limits at all? This could be really dangerous.”
Yes! There are some limits to the principle of submission. Once when I spoke on this subject, a tall, articulate young lady came up after the message. She was ticked off at me. She said, “How could you tell women to submit to th
eir husbands? Do you know how many abused women are out there? They need courage to leave and not be reinforced to stay in those brutal situations.”
She needed assurance that submission had limits, and I encouraged her to come back the next Sunday when I would talk about them. As usual, the Bible itself acknowledges the tensions and the difficulties of trusting God in a fallen world, and sets the limits on submission very clearly.
Look at 1 Peter 2:16. After Peter wrote, “For such is the will of God that by doing right you will silence the ignorance of foolish men,” he added this, “Act as free men.” See, you are not locked in. Submission is not slavery or giving up personal responsibility. God does not want His children living or acting like slaves.
But some like to argue, “The apostle Paul said he was a slave!” (citing 2 Corinthians 4:5 and Philippians 1:1). My answer is a question: to whom? Paul was a slave to Christ (Ephesians 6:6). We are not slaves to human authorities. We’re not to act like slaves. Wives are not to act like slaves—except to Christ. Employees are not to act like slaves, except to Christ.
When Christ says “Jump,” I say, “How high?”
Other than that holy servitude, we are free people. The obedience that we give to human authorities, we give freely. We offer it when we voluntarily submit. If we begin to act like slaves in human relationships, or people try to make us feel like slaves, that is not righteous.
It deeply grieves me to see women wither in homes where an overbearing, unbiblical version of submission is applied. Here’s my challenge to husbands: If your wife is not flourishing—if she is not blossoming like a rose—under your leadership, it’s not righteous leadership. That’s part of the balance. Submission does have limits under God. Husbands who think a lot about submission aren’t thinking enough about their own duties toward their wives! I know too many husbands who can quote Ephesians 5:22 by heart, but they have no ideaave to Ce huge responsibility God gives them in Ephesians 5:25. Husbands who get passionate about Ephesians 5:25—loving their wives as Christ loves the church—usually discover their wives have a lot less trouble with Ephesians 5:22! Indeed, the knife of submission cuts both ways.