Hawthorn

by Jamie Cassidy

  I made Danny a friendship bracelet using leather strips of brown, black and gold. I plaited them neatly and added a horseshoe for luck. It looks beautiful.

  Heather’s bracelet was a little harder, but the village gave me inspiration. I have created a chain of connected silver horseshoes. I hope she likes it. Horseshoes are a lucky charm after all; I looked it up.

  The sun is streaming into my room, cutting across my bed and illuminating the horseshoe bracelet, throwing sparks of light around the room. I lift it and turn it over and the lights dance like a disco ball.

  A shadow flits past in the periphery of my vision. I whip round to look. There’s nothing but the old battered dresser and mirror. I turn my attention back to the bracelet and there it is again. I turn in time to catch it, a shadow in the mirror. It is gone so quickly that I am left wondering what I saw.

  I slip off the bed, still clutching the bracelet and move across the floor to the dresser. There is a small ottoman, which doesn’t really match the dresser, and I park my backside on it and stare into the mirror, stare into my own green eyes. My hair is a mess. I reach up to touch it and my reflection does the same. There is a dark spot above my eyebrow. I rub at it. It doesn’t budge. I reach out to touch the smudge on the mirror, the bracelet still dangling from my hand. My fingers make contact and there is a snap. I pull my hand back and stare at the huge crack in the mirror.

  The mirror is gone. Jules took it away. She asked me how it broke and I told her I just touched it. I don’t think she believed me. I’m not sure I believe me. I mean, how the hell? It doesn’t make any sense. So, I stop worrying about it.

  The dresser looks strange, bare without the mirror, but I can’t help but feel as if it makes the room feel lighter somehow.

  I finish uploading pictures of my latest creations onto my blog and then pick up my mobile phone and plug it in. I’m ready to speak to Liam now. I need to hear his voice, to hear the truth or lies in his tone.

  He picks up on the third ring.

  “Hey, Gemma.”

  For a moment I am speechless, hearing his voice after all these weeks. It’s like a blow to my heart.

  “Gemma? You there?”

  “Yeah, yeah. I’m here.”

  “I’m so glad you called. I wanted to speak to you about something.”

  And here it is, but I find I don’t want him to say it, that I need to get in there first. “I know. Beth told me.”

  “Beth? Beth told you? I don’t understand.”

  “Yeah, she saw you. In Costa, with Jessica.”

  There is a long silence in which I can almost hear the cogs in his brain turning.

  “She told you I was with Jessica and you thought it was a date?”

  He sounds so incredulous that hope blooms in my chest.

  “Well, I… Wasn’t it?”

  “Shit, no! I went in to get a cappuccino and she was there. She asked me to sit with her, so I did, that’s all. It was fifteen minutes, maybe half hour. I can’t believe you’d think that I would… After you told me that you liked me!”

  I feel really stupid now. “I’m sorry.”

  “Yeah, you should be, especially since I spent that time in Costa telling Jessica I couldn’t tutor her anymore because I was going to visit my girlfriend in Learmonth.”

  Girlfriend? Me? I want to jump up and down squealing with joy, but instead I catch my lower lip between my teeth and take a moment to do an internal jig.

  “Girlfriend, eh?”

  “Is that okay?” He sounds suddenly insecure.

  “It’s okay.”

  “So see you on Saturday?”

  In the excitement of being suddenly promoted to girlfriend, I’d almost missed the fact that he’d said he was coming to see me.

  “Gemma? Is that okay? Can I come see you?”

  “Yes! Yes please!”

  He laughs and so do I.

  “So, see you then. Call me when you get to the village and I’ll come down and meet you.”

  “No need. I’m sure I can find the house on the hill. If not, I’ll call you.”

  “Okay. See ya.”

  I press the end call button and stare at my phone.

  Mum is going to be pissed. She knows Liam’s my best friend, but she doesn’t like it too much. I know this and I don’t care. Once Liam is here she can hardly tell him to get lost, can she? There’s also the added bonus of Saturday being the twins’ birthday. Hopefully Liam will arrive when they’re out so I’ll get some time alone with him. Excitement bubbles in my chest and there is no way I can sit still now. Two sleeps to go. I feel like a kid leading up to Christmas.

  I am heading out the door, eager to get rid of all this pent up energy, when Danny appears out of nowhere and rugby tackles my legs.

  “Whoa!” I grab hold of his shoulders and push him back slightly. “What’s the matter?”

  He looks up with tear-filled eyes. “Heather’s being mean.”

  I sigh. This has become common place of late and, to be honest, I don’t understand it. Mum and Jules say it’s a phase. I hope it passes quickly because I miss the twins the way they used to be, together, happy, each other’s best friend. I resolve to have a sit down with Heather as soon as possible. In the meantime, I have a miserable little boy in desperate need of cheering up. I glance out the window. The sky is clear blue, not a cloud in sight. It’s a beautiful day.

  “Go have a wee and then get your trainers and coat on. We’re going for a walk.”

  His face brightens. “Yay!” He rushes off to do as he’s told.

  I slip my coat and trainers on and wait by the door.

  He is back in less than five minutes, clutching Buster.

  “Okay, you two adventurers ready?”

  He nods vigorously.

  “Let’s go.” I take his hand and open the door before stepping out into the cool air.

  “I don’t like it.” Danny snuggles close, wrapping his arms around my hips.

  “Why? It’s just a tree.”

  “It’s a mean tree.”

  “A mean tree?” I ruffle his head. Kids and their imaginations. I cock my head and study the tree, trying to see it the way he does. I crouch and look at it again. From this vantage point it seems huge, a towering, menacing thing. The hole looks like a twisted mouth waiting to devour. Danny is watching me and I turn to him and tweak his nose. “Okay, it is kinda mean-looking. You tired?”

  He shakes his head.

  “Let’s go.” I stand and take his hand again before setting off toward the spot Sam showed me a few days before.

  “Hey!”

  I glance over my shoulder to see Sam striding toward us. Where did he come from? It’s as if thinking about him has summoned him. I suppress a shiver. Danny squeezes my hand tight and tugs.

  I look down at him and smile reassuringly. “Don’t worry, Danny. This is Sam. He’s a friend.”

  Danny shakes his head.

  “You headed to the spot?” Sam asks. He winks at Danny, who hides behind me.

  “Yeah.”

  “Mind if I tag along?”

  “That depends. Are you going to be annoyingly elusive?”

  He laughs. “Sorry about that.”

  I quirk a brow.

  “Okay, I will do my best not to be annoyingly elusive.”

  “In that case you can tag along. Ow!” I frown down at Danny who has squeezed my hand painfully hard.

  He looks up at me innocently.

  “Is this your brother?” Sam steps forward and crouches so he is at eye level with Danny. “Hi. I’m Sam. Nice to meet you.” He holds out his hand.

  I nudge Danny. After a long moment, he steps out from behind me and shakes Sam’s hand.

  Sam’s face breaks into a grin and it is as if the sun has come out. Danny smiles, a small, shy smile. His grip on my hand loosens.

  We’re almost at the spot when Sam veers to the left and leads us onto a new trail.

  “Where are you going?” I ask.

  �
�To the beach.”

  Danny looks up at me, his face alight with excitement. I grin down at him and we pick up the pace.

  We break through the trees onto sand, and the sea is there before us in glorious greys and blues. There is a flight of worn steps leading down to the beach. The railing looks fragile and Sam warns us to stick to the rock face.

  I keep a hand on Danny’s collar as we make our way down. The air is tangy and briny and fresh and I take deep breaths. I can imagine how rosy my cheeks must be from the brisk air. As soon as Danny’s feet kiss the ground he is off, arms out like an airplane with Buster dangling off one wing. He zooms across the sand.

  Sam jerks his head in a ‘come on’ gesture. Raising his arms, he whizzes off after Danny. There is little to do but follow suit.

  The air takes my breath away and I am laughing. I throw back my head, revelling in the freedom of this moment.

  “Gemma!” Danny calls.

  I slip instantly from carefree child mode to big sister mode.

  Danny is down clutching his knee. I break into a run again, but Sam gets to him first.

  For a moment they are one, bent together, twisted like the tree, and then I am there, kneeling beside them.

  “You okay?”

  Danny clutches his knee and nods.

  “Probably a graze,” Sam says.

  Danny is glancing about as if looking for something.

  “Danny? What are you looking for?” I ask.

  “The little girl.”

  I glance around. The beach is deserted, except for us. “There’s no one else here.”

  He looks at me almost pityingly. “You can’t see her.”

  “Oh really? And why is that?”

  “Because she doesn’t want you to.”

  I glance at Sam who shrugs his shoulders. I decide to let it be. Maybe Danny thinks it’s time he had his own imaginary friend. Based on how Heather has been behaving of late, I don’t blame him.

  “Come on, mate. How’s about I show you how to skim stones? A calm, flat surface is always easier, but doing it this way is more of a challenge – which is more fun.”

  I pull Danny to his feet and we watch as Sam picks a stone for himself and one for Danny. He approaches the shore, stands slightly sideways on, and launches the stone across the sea. I count; one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight and then nothing.

  “Wow! I’m impressed.”

  He hands the other stone to Danny who screws up his face and launches the stone into the sea with a plop. “Shit!”

  “Danny!”

  He hides his face behind Buster and I struggle not to laugh.

  “It’s okay, mate. At least you got it to land in the sea. My first time I didn’t even make it that far. All you need is practice. Now you’re living by the sea you can practice whenever you want.”

  It’s getting decidedly cooler and I pull my coat tighter around me. “I think we should head back. It’s getting late.”

  We walk back toward the stairs and I am already three steps up when I realise that Sam is not coming. I look down at him quizzically, but he’s staring off into the distance.

  “Sam?”

  “There’s a storm coming. I think I’ll stay awhile.”

  “Um, okay. I guess I’ll see you, then.” I wait a moment to give him the opportunity to offer me his mobile number or something, but he simply smiles, pats the railing and backs up with a little salute. I watch as he zips up his jacket and turns back to the sea.

  When Danny starts whining that he’s tired, I force myself to climb the steps away from Sam.

  18

  GEMMA

  I knock on Heather’s door and enter. She’s sitting on her bed, playing with her Barbie dolls.

  “Time to get ready for bed, punkin,” I say.

  “Already?”

  “Yup.”

  Heather sighs in an exaggerated fashion and scoots off the bed and over to her dresser.

  I take a seat on her bed and watch as she rummages around for some pyjamas. She’s always been the more independent of the two. Mum says girls usually are. I watch as she pulls out her Frozen pyjamas and changes into them.

  “Will you read me a story tonight?” she asks.

  “If you brush your teeth real quick.”

  She’s off out the door.

  I pick up the dolls and put them in her toy basket. There are a few blocks on the floor so I pick those up too.

  Her wardrobe is slightly ajar so I move to close it.

  “What you doing?”

  I jump, hand on heart. “Shit, Heather! Did you tiptoe or something?”

  “You said a bad word.”

  “I’m sorry.” I push the wardrobe door and it closes with a click. “So, what do you want me to read to you?”

  Heather hops onto her bed and retrieves a book from under her pillow.

  I park my butt next to her and take the book. “The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe? You sure? I thought you said it was boring.”

  Heather shakes her head. “That was before.”

  “Before?”

  “Before I met Elsa.”

  I don’t know what to make of that. Mum says to simply ignore it and Jules agrees, so I open the book and begin to read.

  I’m on chapter two when movement catches my eye. I glance up and my heart stutters. The wardrobe is ajar again.

  I glance down at Heather and she is staring at the wardrobe with a strange smile on her face. It gives me the creeps.

  “Heather?”

  She looks up with that smile still on her face.

  “What you looking at?”

  “Elsa wants to hear the story too.” She blinks up at me. I don’t know why, but I am overcome by irritation, and the conviction that she is playing at this, that she is doing the whole imaginary friend thing for attention. I slide off the bed and march toward the wardrobe intent on flinging it open, proving to her that there is no such thing as Elsa. I reach out to grab the door and something skitters inside. My heart is in my mouth. I slam the door shut and turn the key.

  I stand there staring at it for a long time. A mouse, it had to be a mouse.

  “Gemma? Did you see?”

  I keep my back to her, compose myself and then turn to her with a smile. “I think we may have mice, punkin. Keep that locked for now. I’ll get Jules to check it out in the morning, okay?”

  She yawns and slides under the duvet. “Okay, tuck me in.”

  I tuck her in and drop a kiss on her forehead. “I love you,” I whisper.

  I check on Danny and he’s fast asleep. Then I go downstairs looking for Mum and Jules. I find them in the living room, a bottle of red wine is open on the coffee table and a plate of crisps is half gone.

  “Hi, honey,” Mum says.

  “I think Heather’s imaginary friend maybe a mouse, or mice, not sure,” I say.

  “Really?” Jules puts down her wine glass. “Where?”

  I wave her back. “Not now, Heather’s sleeping. But we can check in the morning. In her wardrobe; I locked it.”

  Mum shook her head. “Won’t help. If the bugger’s in the wardrobe it’ll have another way out besides the door.” She sighs. “We’ll sort it in the morning, but, I tell you, it explains a lot.”

  Jules looks at her quizzically.

  Mum shrugs. “All the skittering and scratching and the movement on the edge of my vision. Now, I’m not a flighty person, but I was seriously beginning to wonder if we had a ghost.” She chuckles. “See, there’s a rational explanation for everything.

  Jules smiles, but it doesn’t light up her eyes. “Don’t worry, honey. We’ll get it sorted.”

  I kiss them both goodnight and head up to bed. The sea air and the walk earlier have exhausted me. I barely have the energy to send Liam a goodnight text before I am out.

  19

  DANNY

  It’s night time and I am awake. I was dreaming about the beach, about Gemma’s friend Sam. It was a bad dream and Sam had a scary
face in it. I’m glad I’m awake so I don’ have to dream it anymore. I reach for Buster and pull him close, squeezing him and closing my eyes again. The little girl on the beach pops into my mind and I try and push her away because I don’t want to think about her. I don’t want to see her grey face and her big black eyes. I don’t want to see her big smile with all the sharp teeth. I remember her voice, like Heather’s friend’s voice. She told me that I was special, that I could come and play with her. I told her to go away. I called out to Gemma, but she said no one would believe me, no one would see. She said it’s all in my head.

  I don’t want to see that little girl again. I don’t want to play with her. Maybe if I tell Heather about her then she’ll ask Elsa to make her leave me alone. This thought makes me feel better and I snuggle down and try to get back to sleep.

  The sound of Heather breathing makes me feel safe.

  My eyes pop open.

  Heather doesn’t share with me anymore…

  I’m real still and listen to the breathing. Its close, at the bottom of my bed… I want to jump out of bed and run out the room, but I’m too scared.

  The breathing moves. It moves from the bottom of the bed, up the side, until its right behind me.

  I am shaking and I need a wee.

  “Come and play, Danny.”

  The voice is horrible like monsters and hairy spiders. I scream and throw back the covers and run to the door. I grab the handle and pull and I can feel it behind me, but I’m too quick. I’m out in the corridor and I’m still screaming.

  But then it has me. It picks me up and hugs me and I try to fight it but it’s too strong.

  “Danny! Danny! It’s okay! Danny!”

  Gemma, its Gemma. I throw my arms around her neck and burst into tears.

  Gemma tucks me into her bed and then goes to get Buster.

  “Here you go.” She hands Buster to me and then cuddles me. “You want to talk about it?”