Ever

by Shade, Darrin

  “Everleigh! How are you feeling?”

  “Um, I’m okay Mr. Hopkins.”

  “What did the doctor say?”

  “I guess I had low blood sugar or something,” I explained.

  “Well, that can definitely cause a person to feel light-headed,” Hopkins commented.

  “I guess so.” I shuffled to my desk and arranged my things.

  “Since you’re here a few minutes before the bell, why don’t we discuss that seed you found.”

  “Um, sure.” I looked around to make sure that no one else was heading into class early.

  Hopkins gestured me to his desk, where he had assembled a packet of printouts. “Here’s some information I was able to get.”

  I flipped through the papers. “This is it!” I exclaimed, spying an image of the seed that still resided my pocket.

  “Yes, it resembles the seed from a blue lotus plant.” Hopkins said. “What’s interesting is that this type of lotus does not grow in Yosemite.”

  “No?”

  “No. In fact, the blue lotus isn’t found in the United States at all.”

  That was weird. “So, where does it come from?”

  “That’s the strange part, Everleigh. I contacted a friend of mine—a botanist at UCLA. He said that this type of plant is only found in Egypt.”

  “Egypt?” I echoed. “That doesn’t make any sense.”

  “No, it doesn’t.” Hopkins agreed. “Are you sure you found this on the field trip?”

  “Yes,” I confirmed.

  “If that’s true, my friend would like to meet with us. Perhaps someone dropped it there, but if these seeds are being found in California for another reason, it would be an exciting scientific discovery.”

  Oh, great. “Well, I’m sure someone dropped it, that makes the most sense.”

  “Where is the seed, now?”

  In my pocket. “Jaren has it.”

  “Ah. His father will be interested in this discovery for the same reason. Would you let your boyfriend know that I need to speak to him?”

  My boyfriend?

  My cheeks were hot again. “Um, sure.”

  The bell rang and the rest of my class started to file into the room. I turned away from Hopkins to face the stares and whispers of the entire room. Double crap.

  “Dehydration is a serious thing, Ms. Jordan,” Hopkins called to my back. “Glad you’re feeling better. Make sure you drink enough water today.”

  “Um, thanks?”

  The stares and whispers stopped. Just like that, I was an Outcast again. Dehydration was apparently nothing special. I gave Hopkins a grateful smile and when the rest of the class was busy copying down his outline, he winked at me. I made it through class without any weird noises or fainting spells. Then I texted Jaren.

  * * *

  “Hey, baby.”

  Baby?

  Jaren gave me a very public hug, which caused a ripple of murmurs to go through the lunch crowd.

  “I need to talk to you—about the seed,” I said.

  “Okay. Now?”

  “Hi, guys!” Val’s boomed in my ear.

  My barrier was up before I turned around. Looking askance, I could see that Jaren’s was, too. “Hey,” I responded.

  “How are you? You never replied to my text.”

  Oops. “I’m sorry, Val. I forgot.” I knew I was giving her a lame excuse.

  “So, what happened?” Even though she was talking to me, Val had her eyes on Jaren.

  “I, um, guess I got dehydrated.” I could see her energy smoke and she was not pleased.

  “Oh. I didn’t know you could faint from that,” Val continued.

  Jaren pulled out his phone. “We only have a few minutes to go over our extra credit project.” He raised an eyebrow at Val.

  “Oh, well I don’t want to interrupt your little meeting.” She took the hint but her energy smoke flashed red.

  “Thanks.” Jaren put his arm around me. “Let’s go.”

  Oh, crap. I could almost see the steam coming out of Val’s ears as she stared at us.

  “No freaking way,” she mumbled, shaking her head as she turned to walk away.

  “That chick is something else,” Jaren grumbled.

  “She’s…difficult to deal with,” I agreed.

  “She’s jealous of you,” Jaren said. “Don’t give me that look, Ever.”

  I let out a nervous giggle. Because I couldn’t talk. At all.

  “Be careful with her,” Jaren continued. “I don’t trust her at all. She’s very disconnected.”

  He meant from Source energy—I had spent some time catching up on my reading. I nodded. “Yes, I know.” What could I do about it? Maybe someday I could help Val learn to find the right connection so she didn’t have to go around sucking up everybody else’s energy.

  Jaren led me to an empty picnic table at the far end of the quad. “Feeling okay?” he asked, setting his backpack down on the bench.

  “Sure.” I wasn’t. I was actually feeling kind of shaken. I could feel Val’s resentment and anger like it was a tangible thing.

  He did his thing, reading me, and I prickled when I sensed it. “I told you not to do that!”

  “Okay, so maybe I’ll do this instead.” Without warning, Jaren picked me right up off the ground and seated me on the end of the table. He stepped in close, standing between my dangling legs.

  Then he kissed me.

  It was a light peck, but there was nothing innocent about it. A dart of pleasure heated my lips and burned right into the pit of my stomach, which had been feeling unsettled. I stared into the twin seas of his eyes and saw myself reflected there, gazing back at him.

  “What are you doing?” I breathed.

  “Making you feel better.”

  “Here? Everyone is watching us!” I looked past him to confirm that we did indeed, have a very interested audience.

  “Aren’t you worried about how this will look?” I meant him and me and he knew it. But Jaren only shrugged.

  “Your energy was too low. I raised it. Can’t have you passing out again,” Jaren whispered in my ear, causing those exciting tingles to spread down to my toes.

  He had stolen another kiss. At school. In front of the entire student body. Crap.

  “Uh—” He may have raised my energy but now my brain was fried.

  “The seed, baby.” Jaren grinned, enjoying my reaction all too much. “What did Hopkins say about the seed.”

  “Well, it looks like a kind of lotus seed, but it’s weird because this kind doesn’t grow here—what?”

  Jaren had gone serious all of a sudden. “My aunt told me stories about the lotus seed.”

  “What kind of stories?”

  “Well…she said that they could carry souls back to their bodies.”

  “Like dead bodies? You mean like reincarnation?”

  Jaren shrugged. “I’m not sure. Maybe she wrote something about it in The Archive?”

  “I’ll check. I skimmed through most of it. There’s a section on herbs and stuff.”

  “I’ll head over to your place after school today. We can look together.”

  What?

  “Um, okay.” How was I going to explain his presence to my mom again? Since he had shown up unannounced after my trip to the ER, my mom had been giving me funny looks. It was only a matter of time before she embarrassed me beyond belief by making some kind of comment about protection or something.

  “Just tell your mom we need to work on the extra credit project. It’s not really a lie.”

  “You’re reading my mind again,” I sighed.

  “You’re an open book, baby.”

  “Baby?” I looked up at him uncertainly.

  “Would you prefer sweetheart?” he asked, tucking a piece of my hair behind my ear.

  “Um, I’m…I’m not used to any of…of that,” I admitted.

  “Me either, honey.” Jaren winked at me and I pushed him playfully. He pulled me into a bear hug. “I rea
lly like you, Ever.”

  I went hot and cold and everything in between. “I um, I like you, too.”

  The rest of the day couldn’t go fast enough.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

  Seeds Are Meant to Be Planted

  “So, you’re getting pretty close to Jaren Wilder,” my mom observed, pulling a batch of cookies from the oven. It was one of those rare days off, and she was using the time to make Gram’s special chocolate chip with Nutella cookies.

  “I guess.” I so did not want to talk about this right now. I was already on pins and needles, waiting for him to ring the doorbell.

  “Have you met his family?”

  “No,” I muttered, stuffing a warm, gooey cookie into my mouth.

  “Everleigh, there’s something I need to talk to you about.” Mom removed her oven mitts and sat down at the table.

  Uh oh. Here it comes. Mom was sure to start her sex talk spiel and I prayed for a miracle to save me from having to hear it. When the doorbell chimed right as she opened her mouth, I almost choked on my second cookie. Did I do that?

  “Hi, Mrs. Jordan. Do I smell cookies?”

  What right did Jaren have to waltz into my kitchen and drop into the chair next to me, like he had been doing it for years? The guy was just too darn comfortable in my house—he was like, more comfortable than I was. I glared at Jaren and he rewarded me with a wink when my mother turned to pour him a glass of iced tea.

  “Chocolate chip and Nutella,” she said, offering him a plate piled high with sugary goodness.

  “My favorite,” Jaren said.

  “Must run in the family,” my mom muttered. “I’ll just be in the yard. I have some gardening to do.”

  I looked at Jaren quizzically. “What did she mean by that?”

  He shrugged as he popped a cookie into his mouth. “No idea.”

  “Should we get to work? I have The Archive in my room.”

  “Yeah, sure.” He picked up the plate of cookies and I grabbed our iced tea.

  Would I ever get used to Jaren Wilder being in my room? Why did he have to sit on my bed? I was never going to be able to concentrate with the guy lounging around on my pillows. The memory of sleeping in his arms was enough to distract me for the rest of my life. I pictured his mouth on mine. Suddenly, I couldn’t breathe. What were we even supposed to be doing, anyway? The Archive. I opened my closet and lifted the loose board at the back. I kept The Archive hidden there, because I had the sneaking suspicion that it shouldn’t fall into the wrong hands. It was a silly notion, because it seemed like I was the only one who could read it, anyway.

  “Ever.”

  “What?” I replied, as I backed out of my closet on all fours.

  “Come here.”

  His voice had gone all husky and quiet. The intense look on Jaren’s face made me gasp. His eyes had gone from blue to steely gray.

  “Why?” I whispered. My hands were shaking. I shot a nervous look at the door. It wasn’t even closed all the way.

  “You know why.”

  “Um…” I hesitated, The Archive still clutched in my hand.

  “You’re thinking the same thing I’m thinking.”

  I knew that my cheeks were on fire. If that was true, then…

  “Come here, Everleigh.” This time it wasn’t so much a request as it was a command.

  I swallowed, and then…well, I obeyed. I felt like I was watching myself from far away as I walked over to him. This time, Jaren was sitting and I was standing—it was the opposite position we had been in during lunch. I dropped The Archive on my bed and just stared. Jaren was perfect. He had high cheekbones and a chiseled jaw. His white-blond hair was perfectly straight and sleek. And his body…don’t even get me started. He perched on the edge of my bed, letting me take him in.

  “You can touch me,” he said, his voice all gravely and tight.

  God, how I wanted to touch Jaren Wilder—all over. My brain had obviously turned off. This was good. Now, I didn’t have to think, only feel. I ran my fingers through his hair, marveling at how soft it was. My hands settled on his broad shoulders, and I gave them an experimental squeeze. He made a low sound that sounded like a cross between a growl and a purr. I brushed lightly down his forearms, to where his hands pressed into my comforter.

  “Enough!” he ground out.

  Jaren’s hands shot out and his strong fingers burned into my hips. The next thing I knew, I was in his lap. He lifted me so that my thighs were on top of his and I was straddling him. His hand trembled a bit as he drew his thumb across my cheekbone. His other hand went into my hair. Then he was fitting his mouth over mine and time stopped.

  His lips parted mine, and his tongue was like hot velvet stroking into my mouth. My hands were around his neck, stealing into his hair. Oh, God, I was on fire. Little sparks of light exploded behind my eyelids. One of my hands was tugging at his shirt, seeking the warm flesh underneath. Something inside of me pulsed with urgent need. I had no idea what to do to quench the hot ache and it was driving me crazy.

  “Jesus, sweetheart, you’re killing me,” Jaren groaned, his lips on my neck.

  I wanted to get closer—as close as I could. I pressed into him, my sensitized lower half pushing into something hard and unyielding. My mouth fell open as my entire body flooded with heat.

  “Shit,” Jaren swore. He held me tight against him for a second, but then his hands gripped me, stilling the rocking motion I was unconsciously engaged in.

  “No,” I urged, trying to remove his hands. There was something waiting for me and I could almost reach it.

  “Ever, we have to stop.” He was breathing hard, and I could see little beads of sweat on his brow. Without thinking, I wiped them away with my fingertip. Jaren’s eyes closed and he seemed to be warring with himself. “I need to get up.”

  I disentangled myself. Holy wow.

  “Where’s your bathroom?” Jaren asked, his voice strained. I pointed, because I couldn’t trust myself to speak. He sat on the side of my bed and took several deep breaths to compose himself before heading down the hallway.

  I fell back into my desk chair and swiveled so that I was facing the mirror. My face was flushed, my lips were swollen, and my hair was a mess. I smoothed my hair shakily and willed my pulse to stop racing. It didn’t. Finally, I took a sip of iced tea and sort of went on autopilot for a minute. I opened The Archive to the section on herbal medicine, clicked on my laptop and did a few searches on lotus plants. I was still trying to recover when Jaren reappeared.

  “Hey.” He leaned over my shoulder. “Yep, that sure looks like the seed you found.”

  “Th-there’s not much online,” I managed. “Um, we should look in The Archive.”

  “Are you okay?”

  “I think so. You?” Neither of us could meet the other’s eyes.

  “Sure.”

  “Okay, then. Well, here’s what it says:

  Mystical Properties of the Blue Lotus: This is a highly magical plant. The seed of the lotus has been said to contain a lost Spirit and can return it to the Body. Some have tried to harness the lotus seed’s power to reincarnate those who have passed. To my knowledge, none have succeeded. The seed can also retain a soul’s essence and return it to those who have lost Spirit but who have not yet died.”

  “Is that it?”

  “I think so.” I flipped through the next few pages. “This next part is about Milk Thistle. ‘Lost Spirit but have not yet died,’” I quoted. “What does that mean?”

  “Well, you know there’s mind, body and then our souls,” Jaren explained. “I think it means when your soul is missing. A lot of people are really disconnected—my aunt used to tell me stories.”

  “How’s everything going?” my mom called from the hallway. A few seconds later, she knocked on my half-open door.

  “Great, Mrs. Jordan.” Jaren smiled as she walked in, bearing yet another plate of cookies.

  When had my mom become such a sugar-pusher? Well, now that I thought about
it, my gram had been a bit of a baker herself. How Mom and Gram managed to look so trim was beyond me. Then again, I consumed a ton of sugar on a daily basis and I was still as thin as a garden rake.

  I must have looked confused because Mom commented, “Studying burns a lot of energy.”

  It was a strange thing to say. Jaren and I exchanged a glance. Studying? Yes, I had been studying something all right… I was grateful for the loud groan my stomach made at that moment—it took attention away from that fact that I was staring at Jaren’s mouth like it was made of candy.

  “So, Jaren…how is your father?” Mom asked out of left field.

  He paused, midbite. “My father?”

  “We went to school together. It was a long time ago.”

  There was a wistful quality to my mother’s voice that I hadn’t heard before. I realized I had never tried to read my mom’s energy. I looked at my mom, and the moment I started to see her colors, she called out, distracting me. “Everleigh!”

  “What, Mom?”

  “I—nothing. Let me know when you two are done studying. I think I’m going to take a look at some boxes we have in the garage.” She closed the door with an audible click.

  Jaren and I stared at each other. “Well, that was really weird,” I said, searching his face.

  “Definitely.” He looked away. I took the hint—talking about Jaren’s father was still off-limits.

  “So, what do we do now?” I meant about the seed and the crying girl, but…I could still feel his fingers on my hips, and that hot ache hadn’t really subsided….

  “The next time I put my hands on you, Everleigh, I don’t want to have to stop. So we better make sure we won’t be interrupted.”

  Holy crap, the way he said it, I knew he meant it. An excited shiver made me tremble. “I meant about, um, the crying girl and the seed.” Sort of.

  “Oh, yeah. About that. I’m not sure, but seeds are meant to be planted.”

  “Well, where should we plant it?” I was still trying to file his words away so I could repeat them in my mind later.

  “I have no idea.”

  “That’s not helpful, Jaren.”

  When I said his name, he turned to me with that same feral look he had worn right before he ordered me to come closer. “I like it when you say my name.”