Queen of the City

by Tamicka Higgins

  “Nah, Vinny, you can’t believe everything you hear. Nas ain’t about that shit.”

  “Yeah, well that ain’t what it seem like. Shit. I’ma just keep my ass in the fuckin’ house and only come out to go to work. Fuck hoopin’. Fuck the club. Shit, fuck this porch. I’m goin’ in the house right fuckin’ now.”

  He got up and left me outside as I sat on the steps. I pulled out my phone just as I got a text message. It was Nas: I told you I would take care of it. We will own this city in a minute. Trust. I love you.

  I heard sirens rushing down the streets in the direction of the Lincoln basketball courts that Vinny just left. In the midst of the sirens, children still ran up and down the streets, chasing each other like there was no tomorrow. The cars still sped down the neighborhood streets like there weren’t any children around. Everything was going along like there wasn’t just a fucking murder just blocks away from here. But this was Milwaukee, though. The violent shit that happened here became so routine that people just expected it to happen, and when it did, they kept on with their lives with no interruption.

  Sadly, since Nas came into the city, I knew there would be much more murders before everything slowed down. He said he came here for a reason, and that fire in his eyes was not going to let him settle for anything else, and no matter what, I was going to be right there with him to see it through.

  Chapter 18

  It didn’t take long for Keyonna to open up to me. It had only been a couple of weeks when she told me she wanted to start bringing me around Tuck. She said that she told him a lot of good things about me and that I wouldn’t mind being the third wheel in their threesomes.

  Nas was ready for it to happen. “You betta not let that nigga fuck you, Lyric. I swear to God,” he would say whenever we spoke about what was going to happen. I had no intentions of letting him inside me. None whatsoever. My only focus was revenge. I wanted him to feel pain like the man Nas had in his garage. It was all for Junie.

  I still wasn’t showing in my pregnancy. I was just about two months in, but from what the pamphlets said, I was right on schedule, so I didn’t worry too much about it. I carried one of them in my purse to read when I had the time. The fact that I wasn’t showing was even better for what I was about to do. I walked into the front room and flipped the television on. The news about Remy’s death was on the news.

  “And right here, in broad daylight, Jennifer Marie West was gunned down at Lincoln Park on the city’s north side. Known to many as Remy, she was a favorite rapper among her peers. She was shot multiple times and was believed to have died immediately. She was murdered in front of a crowd of people, but even with that, there are no leads or anything about the killer. The police are questioning everyone believed to be there at the time, but they are urging anyone with any information about the shooter to contact the Milwaukee Police Department. This is just another tragic death in the city of Milwaukee.”

  Nas sent me a text a few minutes later: Yo, come by the crib.

  I replied: Ok

  When I got there, a crowd of guys was standing outside of his house. They all had on black like they were about to murder somebody. Loc walked to my car as soon as I got out, escorting me up the steps. They all had cold, hard stares as I walked past them. A few of them gave me a head nod as I entered the house. In just a few weeks, Nas had his spot set up like it was something out of New Jack City. In the room just beyond the front, there were naked women with masks on bagging dope. I peeked in as I walked past, but Los quickly closed the door before I could get a good view of everything. Around the corner, two men sat in chairs with double-barreled shotguns. They had black bandanas tied around their mouths with their fingers on the trigger. We walked past them, and they didn’t move their position. We made our way up the stairs and into Nas’s room. He stood by the dresser with his shirt off, slicing bricks of cocaine open and tasting them for validity. Loc closed the door as I walked in and said,

  “Hey, baby.”

  “Whassup, mama.”

  “What you need?”

  “I need you to move in on Tuck. You ready for it?”

  “I mean… the chick is ready to let me in, you know what I’m sayin’, but I don’t want to rush shit. She might think somethin’ is up.”

  He walked to the window that overlooked the backyard. The dogs barked as soon as he put his head by the window.

  “That muthafucka just robbed one of our spots. Took a little cash and some of the dope. I’m ready to move on that nigga right now; you know what I’m sayin’, just show up and shoot his shit up.”

  I tossed my purse on the bed and walked over to him, rubbing my hand on his back. I didn’t really notice the tattoos that covered his shoulder blades until now. Angel wings with words written in the middle, in God’s hands. I felt Big Mama trying to creep into my thoughts, but I began speaking, doing my best to drown her out,

  “Nah, baby. You’re smarter than that. That’s why you sent me in there. He is expecting you to come in hard like that. He probably is waiting for you to do it, you know what I’m sayin’? This is chess, not fucking checkers. Just use some patience and shit. Let yo’ bitch handle it. You can trust me.”

  “You see, that’s why I’m with you. You know how to calm a nigga down and put my thoughts where they need to be.” He turned around and kissed me on my lips. The anger in his eyes subsided while he glanced over at the bed.

  “The fuck is that?”

  He said, letting me go and going over to the bed. I watched him as he grabbed the pamphlet that fell out of my purse. I rushed to take it out his hand, but he moved before I could put my hands on it.

  He read the title of the booklet, then looked towards me. “So, you’re pregnant?” Why the fuck you got this shit?”

  I hung my head low and sat on the bed.

  “Lyric,” he sat next to me, “Why the fuck you got this?”

  “Baby…” I hesitated, “I’m pregnant.”

  He looked back at the pamphlet, “Pregnant?”

  Silence flooded the room as he flipped through the pages of the book. I felt sick to my stomach, knowing that I wasn’t sure if he was the father. I felt like he wouldn’t believe the rape story but even with that, I wouldn’t tell him about it anyway. I was still in the process of blocking it out of my memory, but I was finding that to be nearly impossible. Especially if this baby was a product of that. I was nervous about his reaction even though he told me he wanted to have a son a little while ago. His facial expression didn’t change as he flipped from page to page. The seconds felt like it took hours to pass.

  “So, we havin’ a fuckin’ baby, huh?”

  He tossed the book on the bed and smiled, reaching for my stomach and rubbing his tattooed hand across the surface. He softened up, lifting my shirt as he bent down to kiss my stomach. It felt good to me and honestly, I felt that we were already a family. I put my hand on him as he went back and forth across my stomach.

  “Yeah, we havin’ a baby.”

  “How far along are you?”

  “I’m about two months.”

  He laughed, “Damn! Two fuckin’ months? You kept that shit from me for two months?”

  “No… I just found out myself because I kept throwing up and shit, so I went to the doctor.”

  “Word?”

  “Yeah. They told me that and then gave me one of these books so I could understand the pregnancy better.”

  “Aight, cool. Cool.”

  He smiled again, looking to the side as if he was envisioning a future with his child,

  “So I guess we really need to get movin’ on this shit with Tuck then. I’m guessing yo’ ass ain’t got long before you start lookin’ pregnant and shit.”

  “Yeah.”

  He leaned over and kissed me and it quickly turned into something else. Whenever we had sex, we fucked. It was hard and rough, and I loved that shit, but this time it wasn’t like that. This time, his kisses were slower. His movements were melodic like he was moving t
o some kind of smooth jazz that was playing inside his mind. He stroked my hair and bit my bottom lip softly, caressing every part of my body with his hands. I gripped his tattooed arms, digging my nails into him the deeper he went inside of me, spreading my legs apart as far as they would go. I opened my mouth, wanting to scream out in pleasure but the words didn’t leave my mouth. No sounds were made as we laid together, silently fucking each other with tightly-packed passion releasing from our souls. I was in love with him, and there was nothing that could stand between us.

  Chapter 19

  The next day, I met up with Keyonna at George Webbs, a small restaurant that served breakfast at any time of the day. It was around 5 pm when she walked into the restaurant.

  “Hey boo,” she said, taking a seat across from me.

  I kissed her on the lips, “Whassup bae?”

  “Shit. Ain’t nothing new going on. I have been thinkin’ about you and shit, though.”

  “For real?”

  “Hell yeah. Shit. Damn near got Tuck jealous that I get all googly eyed when I talk to him about you.”

  “Ain’t no need for him to get jealous, I got some shit for him, too.”

  “I bet you do.” She smiled seductively. “But anyways, he tryin’ get up with you.”

  “When?”

  “He said, later on, tonight or tomorrow. He gotta handle some business first, but he said he would let me know.”

  “Aight, that’s cool.”

  The chimes on top of the door rattled when she walked in. It felt like I saw a ghost as I tried to focus my vision. It was really her. I couldn’t believe she showed her face in this city again and after the shit she pulled with me in Chicago. Keyonna turned around, following the path my eyes made as it led her to Quandra. She didn’t even look to our side of the restaurant as she and a few females she was with walked to a table clear across the room. Keyonna turned back to me; her eyebrows scrunched up together in confusion.

  “Who the fuck is that?”

  I didn’t answer her as thoughts of that night flooded back to my memory. In flashes, I saw the hotel room in a complete disaster; my things were thrown all across the floor, my mattress hung off the frame, and the drawers were pulled completely out of the dresser. I remember the horror that went through my bones when I frantically searched under the bed for the money I kept hidden there just to find it gone. Not only that but every one of Quandra’s things were gone too. I remembered that feeling as rage boiled inside my blood. Keyonna moved her lips, but I didn’t hear anything coming from her mouth.

  When Quandra took her seat, I got up and headed in her direction. They were all talking to each other as one of her friends looked in my direction when I stood behind Quandra.

  “Who the fuck is this?” she said as Quandra turned around. Her eyes bucked open as she scooted back in her seat and stood up.

  “Oh my God, Lyric!”

  She reached out to hug me, but I pushed her arms away from me even quicker. She had a look of misunderstanding on her face.

  “What? What’s wrong, Lyric? Where have you been? I’ve been lookin’ for you ever since you left Chicago.”

  “Bullshit.”

  “No, it ain’t bullshit. I swear to God, when I got back to the hotel, I saw all the shit gone. The covers were everywhere, the beds, the dressers were fucked up. I called the hotel front desk, and then they called the police. They thought you were kidnapped and shit, I swear to God, Lyric.”

  Her friends looked at me quizzically, as if they were waiting for me to react to the bullshit she was feeding me.

  “You was lookin’ for me?”

  “Hell yeah. I mean, I even went to yo’ Big Mama house a few times since I came back from Chicago.”

  Mentioning Big Mama was crossing a line that should have never been crossed. I was seconds away from picking up one of the knives off the table and pushing it through her neck.

  “When the fuck did you go to Big Mama’s house?”

  “I umm… I came back about a month ago, and as soon as I came back, I went to her house to ask about you.”

  “A month ago?”

  “Yeah”

  “What did she say?”

  “She just told me you weren’t home, so when I—”

  I swung my fist and hit her in her mouth, knocking her back into one of her friends,

  “Bitch! Big Mama has been dead for over a month! She has been in the hospital longer than that! The fuck you come in here lying on my fuckin’ dead grandma for, huh!? Bitch!”

  I reached over and grabbed her, slinging her into another table as her friends got up. Seconds later, Keyonna came from behind me, knocking one of the girls out with a punch to her jaw. The other girl ran at Keyonna, knocking her backward into a table and knocking it over. Quandra tried to get up, but I kicked her in the mouth as blood poured out almost immediately. I got on top of her and punched her in the face repeatedly.

  She held her arms up to block me. “Lyric, stop! Stop!”

  She yelled as I kept punching. The workers came from behind the counter, trying to pull me off of her as Keyonna picked up a knife and came at them. They ran back behind the counter as I continued punching Quandra while she screamed for me to stop. Blood from her mouth and her nose spread out in every direction as I got up, dragging her by the hair out of the restaurant. The customers pulled out their cell phones and recorded me as I pulled her out kicking and screaming.

  “Bitch!”

  I yelled out as I punched and kicked her a few more times until she was too beat up to protect herself. All of the rage that was buried inside of me from that day came out, and it was relentless. Keyonna got out the restaurant, grabbing me by the arm,

  “Come on, we gotta go! They call the police!”

  She ran to get in her car and pulled off. I walked back to the restaurant. One of Quandra’s girls bled profusely from a stab wound as the workers gathered around her, doing their best to stop the bleeding. Her other friend was completely knocked out, laying across the floor. I grabbed Quandra’s purse and pulled out all the money she had. She owed it to me, I said to myself as the workers yelled at me,

  “Get the fuck out of here! We called the police!”

  “Fuck you and the Muthafuckin’ police!”

  Quandra laid on the sidewalk outside the restaurant, bloodied and slowly regaining her strength. I punched her in the face one last time as the sirens buzzed in the distance. I knew they would be here any second as I drove out the parking lot. She only had a couple hundred dollars in her purse, but I didn’t care. It wasn’t even about the money. I had a taste of revenge, and it was sweet to the touch. It only made me want to go after Big Tuck even more. I knew if Nas saw what I did, he would stand and poke his chest out like a proud father.

  Keyonna called me as I sped away from the restaurant. “Damn, bitch! At least warn me if you about to go fuck somebody up! I didn’t know what the fuck was up at first!”

  “My bad. That was some shit from a while ago. She must have thought I left the city again or some shit.”

  “I fucked that bitch up. She tried to stab me and shit, but I ended up putting that shit through her stomach.”

  “I saw it.”

  “Shit. You don’t get to be Tuck’s main bitch if you ain’t willing to cut a muthafucka. I’ve done that shit before so it ain’t nothing to do it again.”

  “Shit, I hear you.”

  “Well, meet me at the park. I’m almost there.”

  “Aight.”

  When we got to the park, she told me that Tuck was going to be free tomorrow, and he just wanted to fuck. She said she sent him pictures of me while she waited in the car and he knew me. Suzy Rock? he stated in the text. It sent an alarm to me because I didn’t find out if he knew about my relationship with Junie. If he did, then he would know who I was, and everything me and Nas planned could go to shit real quick but I ignored it. This plan was set in stone, and nothing was going to change it. I had just tasted revenge, and I was too close
to feeling it again to turn back.

  Chapter 20

  Big Tuck never fucked with new girls inside his crib. That’s what he told Keyonna when she asked me to meet her at the hotel downtown. It was one of the high-priced suites at the Omni. I sat in the car with Nas a few blocks from the hotel. Loc and Man-Man sat in the front seats with loaded pistols ready for anything.

  “How long you need before we come in there?”

  “Umm… maybe like 15 minutes.”

  He looked at me with a side-eye. “That’s a long ass time.”

  “I gotta’ get him comfortable. Listen, nigga, just let me do this shit.”

  He huffed as spoke to Man-Man. “See, my nigga, you need a bitch like this. Somebody who ain’t scared to talk to you any fuckin’ way, even knowing you got bodies on you. That shit is sexy.”

  Man-Man didn’t respond as he looked at me in the rearview mirror, then quickly turned back to observe the area we were parked in.

  Keyonna texted me: Bitch, where you at?

  I texted back: I’m like five minutes away.

  Keyonna replied: Aight, hurry up. You don’t want to make that big muthafucka mad for waiting.

  I looked at Nas. “Baby, I gotta go.”

  “Aight.” As I moved to get out the car, he grabbed me by my arm and pulled me back in, kissing me on the lips. “No fuckin.”

  I rolled my eyes and walked to my car that was parked just in front of theirs. When I pulled up, Keyonna was standing by the door anxiously waiting for me. Before I knew it, we were making our way up to the top floor.

  “Now look,” she said as she started prepping me for what was to come, “don’t go in there doing anything different than what you did with me. I don’t know if you’re nervous or not but if you are, just be cool. Just suck his dick good and let him fuck you however he wants. And then,” she smiled at me as the elevator beeped, passing each floor, “fuck the shit out of me. He likes to watch that shit.”