Complete Plays, The

by William Shakespeare

  Hamlet

  That if you be honest and fair, your honesty should admit no discourse to your beauty.

  Ophelia

  Could beauty, my lord, have better commerce than with honesty?

  Hamlet

  Ay, truly; for the power of beauty will sooner transform honesty from what it is to a bawd than the force of honesty can translate beauty into his likeness: this was sometime a paradox, but now the time gives it proof. I did love you once.

  Ophelia

  Indeed, my lord, you made me believe so.

  Hamlet

  You should not have believed me; for virtue cannot so inoculate our old stock but we shall relish of it: I loved you not.

  Ophelia

  I was the more deceived.

  Hamlet

  Get thee to a nunnery: why wouldst thou be a breeder of sinners? I am myself indifferent honest; but yet I could accuse me of such things that it were better my mother had not borne me: I am very proud, revengeful, ambitious, with more offences at my beck than I have thoughts to put them in, imagination to give them shape, or time to act them in. What should such fellows as I do crawling between earth and heaven? We are arrant knaves, all; believe none of us. Go thy ways to a nunnery. Where’s your father?

  Ophelia

  At home, my lord.

  Hamlet

  Let the doors be shut upon him, that he may play the fool no where but in’s own house. Farewell.

  Ophelia

  O, help him, you sweet heavens!

  Hamlet

  If thou dost marry, I’ll give thee this plague for thy dowry: be thou as chaste as ice, as pure as snow, thou shalt not escape calumny. Get thee to a nunnery, go: farewell. Or, if thou wilt needs marry, marry a fool; for wise men know well enough what monsters you make of them. To a nunnery, go, and quickly too. Farewell.

  Ophelia

  O heavenly powers, restore him!

  Hamlet

  I have heard of your paintings too, well enough; God has given you one face, and you make yourselves another: you jig, you amble, and you lisp, and nick-name God’s creatures, and make your wantonness your ignorance. Go to, I’ll no more on’t; it hath made me mad. I say, we will have no more marriages: those that are married already, all but one, shall live; the rest shall keep as they are. To a nunnery, go.

  Exit

  Ophelia

  O, what a noble mind is here o’erthrown!

  The courtier’s, soldier’s, scholar’s, eye, tongue, sword;

  The expectancy and rose of the fair state,

  The glass of fashion and the mould of form,

  The observed of all observers, quite, quite down!

  And I, of ladies most deject and wretched,

  That suck’d the honey of his music vows,

  Now see that noble and most sovereign reason,

  Like sweet bells jangled, out of tune and harsh;

  That unmatch’d form and feature of blown youth

  Blasted with ecstasy: O, woe is me,

  To have seen what I have seen, see what I see!

  Re-enter King Claudius and Polonius

  King Claudius

  Love! his affections do not that way tend;

  Nor what he spake, though it lack’d form a little,

  Was not like madness. There’s something in his soul,

  O’er which his melancholy sits on brood;

  And I do doubt the hatch and the disclose

  Will be some danger: which for to prevent,

  I have in quick determination

  Thus set it down: he shall with speed to England,

  For the demand of our neglected tribute

  Haply the seas and countries different

  With variable objects shall expel

  This something-settled matter in his heart,

  Whereon his brains still beating puts him thus

  From fashion of himself. What think you on’t?

  Lord Polonius

  It shall do well: but yet do I believe

  The origin and commencement of his grief

  Sprung from neglected love. How now, Ophelia!

  You need not tell us what Lord Hamlet said;

  We heard it all. My lord, do as you please;

  But, if you hold it fit, after the play

  Let his queen mother all alone entreat him

  To show his grief: let her be round with him;

  And I’ll be placed, so please you, in the ear

  Of all their conference. If she find him not,

  To England send him, or confine him where

  Your wisdom best shall think.

  King Claudius

  It shall be so:

  Madness in great ones must not unwatch’d go.

  Exeunt

  SCENE II. A HALL IN THE CASTLE.

  Enter Hamlet and Players

  Hamlet

  Speak the speech, I pray you, as I pronounced it to you, trippingly on the tongue: but if you mouth it, as many of your players do, I had as lief the town-crier spoke my lines. Nor do not saw the air too much with your hand, thus, but use all gently; for in the very torrent, tempest, and, as I may say, the whirlwind of passion, you must acquire and beget a temperance that may give it smoothness. O, it offends me to the soul to hear a robustious periwig-pated fellow tear a passion to tatters, to very rags, to split the ears of the groundlings, who for the most part are capable of nothing but inexplicable dumbshows and noise: I would have such a fellow whipped for o’erdoing Termagant; it out-herods Herod: pray you, avoid it.

  First Player

  I warrant your honour.

  Hamlet

  Be not too tame neither, but let your own discretion be your tutor: suit the action to the word, the word to the action; with this special o’erstep not the modesty of nature: for any thing so overdone is from the purpose of playing, whose end, both at the first and now, was and is, to hold, as ’twere, the mirror up to nature; to show virtue her own feature, scorn her own image, and the very age and body of the time his form and pressure. Now this overdone, or come tardy off, though it make the unskilful laugh, cannot but make the judicious grieve; the censure of the which one must in your allowance o’erweigh a whole theatre of others. O, there be players that I have seen play, and heard others praise, and that highly, not to speak it profanely, that, neither having the accent of Christians nor the gait of Christian, pagan, nor man, have so strutted and bellowed that I have thought some of nature’s journeymen had made men and not made them well, they imitated humanity so abominably.

  First Player

  I hope we have reformed that indifferently with us, sir.

  Hamlet

  O, reform it altogether. And let those that play your clowns speak no more than is set down for them; for there be of them that will themselves laugh, to set on some quantity of barren spectators to laugh too; though, in the mean time, some necessary question of the play be then to be considered: that’s villanous, and shows a most pitiful ambition in the fool that uses it. Go, make you ready.

  Exeunt Players

  Enter Polonius, Rosencrantz, and Guildenstern

  How now, my lord! I will the king hear this piece of work?

  Lord Polonius

  And the queen too, and that presently.

  Hamlet

  Bid the players make haste.

  Exit Polonius

  Will you two help to hasten them?

  Rosencrantz

  Guildenstern

  We will, my lord.

  Exeunt Rosencrantz and Guildenstern

  Hamlet

  What ho! Horatio!

  Enter Horatio

  Horatio

  Here, sweet lord, at your service.

  Hamlet

  Horatio, thou art e’en as just a man

  As e’er my conversation coped withal.

  Horatio

  O, my dear lord,—

  Hamlet

  Nay, do not think I flatter;

  For what advancement may I hope from thee

>   That no revenue hast but thy good spirits,

  To feed and clothe thee? Why should the poor be flatter’d?

  No, let the candied tongue lick absurd pomp,

  And crook the pregnant hinges of the knee

  Where thrift may follow fawning. Dost thou hear?

  Since my dear soul was mistress of her choice

  And could of men distinguish, her election

  Hath seal’d thee for herself; for thou hast been

  As one, in suffering all, that suffers nothing,

  A man that fortune’s buffets and rewards

  Hast ta’en with equal thanks: and blest are those

  Whose blood and judgment are so well commingled,

  That they are not a pipe for fortune’s finger

  To sound what stop she please. Give me that man

  That is not passion’s slave, and I will wear him

  In my heart’s core, ay, in my heart of heart,

  As I do thee.— Something too much of this.—

  There is a play to-night before the king;

  One scene of it comes near the circumstance

  Which I have told thee of my father’s death:

  I prithee, when thou seest that act afoot,

  Even with the very comment of thy soul

  Observe mine uncle: if his occulted guilt

  Do not itself unkennel in one speech,

  It is a damned ghost that we have seen,

  And my imaginations are as foul

  As Vulcan’s stithy. Give him heedful note;

  For I mine eyes will rivet to his face,

  And after we will both our judgments join

  In censure of his seeming.

  Horatio

  Well, my lord:

  If he steal aught the whilst this play is playing,

  And ’scape detecting, I will pay the theft.

  Hamlet

  They are coming to the play; I must be idle:

  Get you a place.

  Danish march. A flourish. Enter King Claudius, Queen Gertrude, Polonius, Ophelia, Rosencrantz, Guildenstern, and others

  King Claudius

  How fares our cousin Hamlet?

  Hamlet

  Excellent, i’ faith; of the chameleon’s dish: I eat the air, promise-crammed: you cannot feed capons so.

  King Claudius

  I have nothing with this answer, Hamlet; these words are not mine.

  Hamlet

  No, nor mine now.

  To Polonius

  My lord, you played once i’ the university, you say?

  Lord Polonius

  That did I, my lord; and was accounted a good actor.

  Hamlet

  What did you enact?

  Lord Polonius

  I did enact Julius Caesar: I was killed i’ the

  Capitol; Brutus killed me.

  Hamlet

  It was a brute part of him to kill so capital a calf there. Be the players ready?

  Rosencrantz

  Ay, my lord; they stay upon your patience.

  Queen Gertrude

  Come hither, my dear Hamlet, sit by me.

  Hamlet

  No, good mother, here’s metal more attractive.

  Lord Polonius

  [To King Claudius] O, ho! do you mark that?

  Hamlet

  Lady, shall I lie in your lap?

  Lying down at Ophelia’s feet

  Ophelia

  No, my lord.

  Hamlet

  I mean, my head upon your lap?

  Ophelia

  Ay, my lord.

  Hamlet

  Do you think I meant country matters?

  Ophelia

  I think nothing, my lord.

  Hamlet

  That’s a fair thought to lie between maids’ legs.

  Ophelia

  What is, my lord?

  Hamlet

  Nothing.

  Ophelia

  You are merry, my lord.

  Hamlet

  Who, I?

  Ophelia

  Ay, my lord.

  Hamlet

  O God, your only jig-maker. What should a man do but be merry? for, look you, how cheerfully my mother looks, and my father died within these two hours.

  Ophelia

  Nay, ’tis twice two months, my lord.

  Hamlet

  So long? Nay then, let the devil wear black, for I’ll have a suit of sables. O heavens! die two months ago, and not forgotten yet? Then there’s hope a great man’s memory may outlive his life half a year: but, by’r lady, he must build churches, then; or else shall he suffer not thinking on, with the hobby-horse, whose epitaph is ‘For, O, for, O, the hobby-horse is forgot.’

  Hautboys play. The dumb-show enters

  Enter a King and a Queen very lovingly; the Queen embracing him, and he her. She kneels, and makes show of protestation unto him. He takes her up, and declines his head upon her neck: lays him down upon a bank of flowers: she, seeing him asleep, leaves him. Anon comes in a fellow, takes off his crown, kisses it, and pours poison in the King’s ears, and exit. The Queen returns; finds the King dead, and makes passionate action. The Poisoner, with some two or three Mutes, comes in again, seeming to lament with her. The dead body is carried away. The Poisoner wooes the Queen with gifts: she seems loath and unwilling awhile, but in the end accepts his love

  Exeunt

  Ophelia

  What means this, my lord?

  Hamlet

  Marry, this is miching mallecho; it means mischief.

  Ophelia

  Belike this show imports the argument of the play.

  Enter Prologue

  Hamlet

  We shall know by this fellow: the players cannot keep counsel; they’ll tell all.

  Ophelia

  Will he tell us what this show meant?

  Hamlet

  Ay, or any show that you’ll show him: be not you ashamed to show, he’ll not shame to tell you what it means.

  Ophelia

  You are naught, you are naught: I’ll mark the play.

  Prologue

  For us, and for our tragedy,

  Here stooping to your clemency,

  We beg your hearing patiently.

  Exit

  Hamlet

  Is this a prologue, or the posy of a ring?

  Ophelia

  ’Tis brief, my lord.

  Hamlet

  As woman’s love.

  Enter two Players, King and Queen

  Player King

  Full thirty times hath Phoebus’ cart gone round

  Neptune’s salt wash and Tellus’ orbed ground,

  And thirty dozen moons with borrow’d sheen

  About the world have times twelve thirties been,

  Since love our hearts and Hymen did our hands

  Unite commutual in most sacred bands.

  Player Queen

  So many journeys may the sun and moon

  Make us again count o’er ere love be done!

  But, woe is me, you are so sick of late,

  So far from cheer and from your former state,

  That I distrust you. Yet, though I distrust,

  Discomfort you, my lord, it nothing must:

  For women’s fear and love holds quantity;

  In neither aught, or in extremity.

  Now, what my love is, proof hath made you know;

  And as my love is sized, my fear is so:

  Where love is great, the littlest doubts are fear;

  Where little fears grow great, great love grows there.

  Player King

  ’Faith, I must leave thee, love, and shortly too;

  My operant powers their functions leave to do:

  And thou shalt live in this fair world behind,

  Honour’d, beloved; and haply one as kind

  For husband shalt thou —

  Player Queen

  O, confound the rest!

  Such love must needs be treason in my breast:


  In second husband let me be accurst!

  None wed the second but who kill’d the first.

  Hamlet

  [Aside] Wormwood, wormwood.

  Player Queen

  The instances that second marriage move

  Are base respects of thrift, but none of love:

  A second time I kill my husband dead,

  When second husband kisses me in bed.

  Player King

  I do believe you think what now you speak;

  But what we do determine oft we break.

  Purpose is but the slave to memory,

  Of violent birth, but poor validity;

  Which now, like fruit unripe, sticks on the tree;

  But fall, unshaken, when they mellow be.

  Most necessary ’tis that we forget

  To pay ourselves what to ourselves is debt:

  What to ourselves in passion we propose,

  The passion ending, doth the purpose lose.

  The violence of either grief or joy

  Their own enactures with themselves destroy:

  Where joy most revels, grief doth most lament;

  Grief joys, joy grieves, on slender accident.

  This world is not for aye, nor ’tis not strange

  That even our loves should with our fortunes change;

  For ’tis a question left us yet to prove,

  Whether love lead fortune, or else fortune love.

  The great man down, you mark his favourite flies;

  The poor advanced makes friends of enemies.

  And hitherto doth love on fortune tend;

  For who not needs shall never lack a friend,

  And who in want a hollow friend doth try,

  Directly seasons him his enemy.

  But, orderly to end where I begun,

  Our wills and fates do so contrary run

  That our devices still are overthrown;

  Our thoughts are ours, their ends none of our own:

  So think thou wilt no second husband wed;

  But die thy thoughts when thy first lord is dead.

  Player Queen

  Nor earth to me give food, nor heaven light!

  Sport and repose lock from me day and night!

  To desperation turn my trust and hope!

  An anchor’s cheer in prison be my scope!

  Each opposite that blanks the face of joy

  Meet what I would have well and it destroy!

  Both here and hence pursue me lasting strife,

  If, once a widow, ever I be wife!

  Hamlet

  If she should break it now!

  Player King

  ’Tis deeply sworn. Sweet, leave me here awhile;

  My spirits grow dull, and fain I would beguile

  The tedious day with sleep.

  Sleeps

  Player Queen

  Sleep rock thy brain,