Confessions of a D-List Supervillain

by Bernheimer, Jim; Hsieh, Fiona

  • • •

  “Earth to Stacy, are you still there?” Holly asks, bringing me back to the present.

  “Yes,” I answer. “I was just thinking that I need a vacation.”

  “You’ve definitely earned one. Where are you thinking about going?”

  “Somewhere quiet to get away from everything for a week. Maybe a small tropical island, I don’t know. It’s been a rough year.”

  Holly nods as we adjust our path for the turn the convoy below us is taking. “Sounds like a plan. If you want company, let me know. If you want to go solo, that’s okay too.”

  I start to reply, but a loud rumbling catches my attention. The source is a half-built office building and it’s collapsing. My mental funk clears and I start acting. A quick scan of the area with my powers shows the building is thankfully vacant. The main risk is damage to the surrounding buildings that aren’t and to the convoy we’re escorting.

  “I don’t sense anyone inside,” I say over Holly telling Kevin to get the chariot closer so Robin can use her force shields to stop the flying debris. When it comes down to it, we’re professional heroes and being together for over a decade has made us the best at what we do.

  The only problem with this is the nagging feeling that this isn’t a coincidence.

  WhirlWendy, flying nearby, helps Hera with the dust and debris. Between the two, the cloud dissipates rapidly. The things that become readily apparent are that it was only the front of the building that collapsed with the other three walls still intact. Also, there is very little in the way of debris. Finally, there’s the matter of all the robots pouring out of the three-sided trap. There are hundreds of them, mostly the ball type robots, but there are some larger Warbots in the mix as well.

  “Ambush!” Robin shouts as the laser blast emerge from the shadow of the trap. She protects us, but the staggering amount of power is like buckshot to the buildings behind us that are full of onlookers.

  I glance at the convoy and see it stopped. It looks like some kind of cylinder with a manhole cover disguise on top has bisected the armored van carrying Lazarus. He’s probably already out of his shackles and changing into an Ultraweapon suit.

  Holly sees it too and throws one of her energy spears at the van, hoping to put a stop to things before it gets any messier. It splashes ineffectively on a shield coming from the pillar. Realization dawns on me. If this was just going to be a jailbreak, he wouldn’t have brought so many robots. Lazarus wants a war in the middle of downtown San Francisco and doesn’t care about the collateral damage!

  Robin and Athena bark orders. When the chariot is within thirty feet of the ground, I leap off and brace my body for the landing, regretting that I didn’t wear my powered armor that Cal made for me. My mental blasts are more effective against living opponents, but they can still do the job against the smaller robots.

  I join the woefully outgunned federal agents and SWAT officers on the ground scattering from the vehicles, some already burning. Concentrating, I focus my energy into a tight stream and unleash it on the first group of balls I see. There are so many of them that it’s nearly impossible to miss and the area is so dense with buildings that heroes like Wendy and Bolt Action can’t unleash the full force of their powers.

  We’re in trouble!

  A pulse cannon love tap sends me back into a mailbox. I finish ripping the hunk of twisted metal out of the ground and hurl it back at the approaching wall of bots. Gouts of fire slag at least twenty of them as Apollo summons jets of magma. Ares is smashing away with his titanium mace but the robots around him suddenly detonate sending him flying through the air.

  “Cover me, Aphrodite!” Zeus shouts, crouching low and trying to make himself as small a target as possible. He’s charging up for a full release of his lightning powers and needs me to buy him time. Ripping a parking meter out of the concrete and using the ball of metal and stone at the end as my own club, I jump in front of him and go back to my old high school field hockey days on the closest group of robots. My brute strength helps clear the ones in the immediate area and my mind blasts take out some in the second wave.

  “I can handle these, Zeus. Try and take out one of the big ones.”

  “Right,” he answers with a grunt. “Here it goes!”

  Energy erupts from his body like a horizontal geyser, ripping a jagged line through the opposing robots. The discharge makes many of the ones in the path explode and that causes an even wider swath of destructions. The mass of energy slams into the leg of one of the large Warbots and sends it crashing to the ground.

  Hermes zips up the path Zeus just cleared to get to the back of the pack and start attacking them from there. The danger is everywhere, but we’re starting to take the momentum.

  “Energy building up!” Zeus says pointing at the shielded cylinder protecting Lazarus.

  We dive to the ground as it pulses outward, killing the few remaining agents nearby and even destroying some of the robots. Sadly, that probably bothers Lazarus more. He’s so far beyond gone now.

  There’s a lull in the action as the remaining robots hold their fire. They’re waiting for his command. I search the sky looking for the shape so many used to look up to and find it, floating above the wreckage. His color scheme is different – red on black.

  “When you finish playing with these toys,” he announces, “Come down to the waterfront and that’s where the real fun begins.”

  Bolt Action launches himself, but Ultraweapon turns him aside with a computer assisted burst from his force blasters and starts to fly away. I hit him with my mind blast, but it only manages to shove his suit as his shields absorb it along with a spear from Athena. Zeus can’t fire until he finishes recharging and Ultraweapon is already out of range as his remaining robots resume fire and give us something else to worry about.

  Leaping next to me, Holly hurls another spear and says, “He’s got us dancing to his tune. If this is his version of a distraction, I hate to think of what’s waiting for us.”

  “He forgot one thing,” I shout and blast another robot to pieces with my mind. Lazarus has gone too far this time and needs to be stopped.

  “What’s that?”

  “He used to lead, but I was always the better dancer!”

  • • •

  We’re tired and more than a little banged up as we advance to the waterfront. Keisha sprints back from her scouting sortie and blurts out what’s ahead.

  “He’s got ten more Warbots and another one of those Behemoth things from Los Angeles!”

  Of course, it all makes sense. Why would he just build one atomic powered robot?

  Hera puts down the communicator she was using and scowls, saying, “The Navy has a carrier off the coast. They’ve got a squadron launching, with an ETA of thirty minutes. They need us to keep them close to the shore and not let them further into the city.”

  Athena nods, “We can assume that Ultraweapon already intercepted this message and knows what’s coming.”

  Flying over the virtual river of people running for their lives below us, we race headlong into battle.

  • • •

  Fifteen minutes have passed, though it feels like hours. I’d check, but I can barely move. Ares might be seriously hurt. He’d taken out a Warbot and was emerging from the wreckage when Lazarus hit Frankie point blank in the back with everything he had. When Ares landed, the Behemoth stepped on him.

  The fight rages on, but my part in it is done. Lazarus turned on me next and neither of us held back. If I had my armor, I might have won. Instead, he’s holding me up by my neck, choking me while I fire ever weakening mental bolts at him. I’m spent and he’s toying with me. Even with my superhuman endurance, I’ll pass out any second now. Part of me wonders if he’ll just keep squeezing until I’m dead and if my powers will transfer to either my brother or sister when I die like they did with the original Hephaestus. A male Aphrodite? Now there’s a stupid thought.

  “I think this is a good look for you,
Aphrodite. This is really your own fault. If you hadn’t been such a whore, none of this would have happened!”

  I try to say, “Go to hell,” but don’t have any air to do it.

  “No matter what else happens today, I’ll go down in history as the man that destroyed The Olympians!”

  His statement is punctuated by a large explosion. One of his six remaining Warbots just went down in a big way. His grip loosens and I suck in the most awful smelling lungful of air ever, but it tastes like life itself to me. Even with my blurry vision, I can see two shapes approaching from the wreckage of the large robot. Lazarus tosses me aside and leaps into the air to attack them. The first one is dressed in some kind of a solid red outfit and the other one is in a suit of armor. I don’t recognize either of them.

  Ultraweapon’s opening volley strikes an expanding field of power surrounding the red hero. It grows into a huge figure, lifting Red into the air and into the center of the humanoid energy construct. Who in the hell is that? The “arm” of the energy being swats Lazarus aside as he pounces on the back of a Warbot, and rips an arm off of the big robot.

  As impressive as that is, the armored hero is carrying what looks like a big pistol and fires it at the relatively pristine Behemoth. I can’t tell if it’s a slug, a missile, or a bolt of energy, but it rips through the shielding and wrecks one of the laser assemblies. Bolt Action had hit that thing twice already and did far less damage.

  Who the hell are these guys?

  Lazarus turns on the other armored suit and they both go skyward and try to beat the tar out of each other. It looks like Ultraweapon is faster, but the new guy is better armed, if that’s possible. The pace picks up and they’re moving too fast for my tired eyes to follow.

  Staggering to my feet, I know I should pitch in and help the others. The Red hero with the giant energy form is wrestling with two of the Warbots while Wendy, Bolt Action, Zeus, and Apollo are working as a team against two more. Concentrating, I fire off a streamer of mental energy that smacks into the back of the one Wendy managed to knock on its side into the larger Behemoth. The shielding of the two robots is nullified by their contact and the two are momentarily vulnerable. The elongated head of the Behemoth takes another shot from that hand canon the unidentified armored hero just shot.

  Did he beat Lazarus that easily? No, there’s Ultraweapon coming back for round two.

  I try a telepathic message to the new guy, partly to warn him and partly to see if I can get a glimpse of who these new heroes are.

  Nothing! Too much shielding. As far as I can tell, nobody is inside that suit. Maybe it’s a robot and I can’t get anything off of it.

  Diving out of the way as the Red hero leaps by me and into the Behemoth, I forget about trying to figure out identities and focus on what I’m supposed to be doing.

  Red’s energy form is only about a third of the size of Patterson’s monster. It’s like watching a midget attack a full grown person, but Red is one very determined midget. I add what little I have to offer as his presence drives the giant robot backward in the direction of the water. The sound of metal ripping fills the air as Red tears at the damage created by his teammate’s earlier shot. Something begins to form behind the Behemoth. It’s Wendy, she’s pulling up a waterspout out of the bay. Red keeps it busy while the Gulf Coast Guardian drops tons of water on them both. The electrical energy released is enough to knock Red off, but he picks up an abandoned city bus and hurls it into the failing robot’s upper torso. Aided by Wendy’s wind gusts, it causes the thing to fall into the water.

  Red wastes no time and leaps onto the fallen mass of metal. He’s going to rip out the core as Wendy continues to rain down water to prevent the core from overheating. I get the strangest feeling that Wendy has worked with Red and the new suit before.

  There’s still the danger that Lazarus could detonate the thing, so I spin and look. No, the new hero is all over him spewing energy and weapon fire. The Ultraweapon suit is in complete defensive mode. Another powerful blast knocks my ex from the sky and he plows into the ground. The suit’s shields must be down, I can sense his panic. If I can get a line of sight on him, I can stun him and end this. Digging deep, I scrounge for whatever strength I have left and awkwardly sprint in the direction of his disjointed thoughts.

  When I crest the pile of rubble, the other armored hero has Ultraweapon held up with both arms. A fresh ripple of raw panic emanates from Lazarus along with recognition. He knows who the suit really is! I send enough energy to stun him, but before it strikes the two are cocooned in a massive high voltage discharge. By the time my bolt hits, Lazarus is already dead.

  The new suit, I can’t call him or it a hero if he just executes a person like that, lets loose a second discharge. That’s just overkill. I wait to see if it does a third, but it just drops the fried Ultraweapon armor like so much rubbish.

  “You didn’t have to do that!” I scream at the armor. It turns and faces me. There’s barely a scratch on the damn thing! Lazarus never stood a chance.

  “Who are you? What are you?”

  It says nothing, but flies into the sky and attacks the last remaining Warbot and I’m left staring at the twisted shell of metal and flesh that used to tell me how much he cared. Bile creeps up into the back of my throat as tears roll down my cheeks. The new armored fighter knew Lazarus and hated him enough to electrocute him and then do it again just to be certain.

  There are only two people I know that despise Ultraweapon that much and could do it wearing a suit of armor. If the Overlord had a suit like that he wouldn’t stop with just killing Lazarus. He’d be killing us now, but he’s not. Instead, he’s exchanging a fist bump with his partner and ignoring the shouts of everyone else. They’re leaving. Artificial intelligences don’t “hate” and they don’t fist bump. That’s got to be a real person!

  The only other candidate … No! It can’t be. He’s dead. Isn’t he?

  I move away from the stench around the corpse and walk down to the waterline. Standing there, I ponder the ramifications until an equally exhausted Holly finds me. “Stacy, are you okay?”

  “I’m banged up, but I’ll live. How’s Frankie?”

  She answers, “Not good. The Chariot’s taking him to the nearest hospital along with a couple of others. Robin wants me to try and figure out who that duo was.”

  “Did you ask Wendy? I think she might have an idea.” I might as well, but I want to be sure.

  “She left right after the new guys.”

  It does seem like she has something to hide. “Lazarus said he wanted to go down as the man who destroyed us. He almost did it.”

  “Well, he didn’t. We’re going to be shorthanded for awhile, but we’ll get by. It probably means you won’t be able to take vacation anytime soon.”

  Inside my mind, I’m already dismantling the barriers I’d made around my lost memories. I have to know the truth!

  “S’okay, Holly. Maybe I’ll just curl up with a book instead.”

  Epilogue the Second

  The Inverted Hot Fudge Sundae

  Landing the hoversled and fighting off the butterflies circling in my stomach, I take a deep breath and look at my destination. All the countless dangers I’ve faced and I’m scared at what I might find under this beat up old grain silo.

  “Get a grip, Stacy,” I say trying to will my nervousness away. “If he’s here, he’s still alive.”

  But what do I do then? It took all this time to finally remember everything about Cal and why I was so taken with him. If I’m being honest with myself, I stopped trying after his death in Los Angeles, but after the fiasco in San Francisco, I slowly reassembled my memories of this shithole. Two days ago, I remembered everything.

  Climbing off the vehicle, I walk in the direction of a crumbling barn next to that silo, retracing the steps that I only now remember. I feel giddy like a schoolgirl and struggle against getting my hopes up. A hint of fear crosses my heart. What if he doesn’t want me anymore? Without the me
mories of why I found him great, I wasn’t very kind to him. For everything that’s been said about him, he can hold a monstrous grudge.

  Holly would mock me and tell me that I could do a million times better than Cal Stringel, but she’s wrong. He’s a great guy and I finally remember why he’s so special. At best, he tolerated the glitz and glamour of my world, but he’d bend over backward to share his world with me. Unlike Lazarus, he had a streak of humility and could stomach being defeated without it occupying his every waking moment or me being more successful than him. He could handle that and even took pride in being the “second most powerful” member of his team behind Wendy. Much like my namesake goddess had fallen for her inventor, I did as well. Cal has a genius that reaches beyond just his suit and I thought I could bring out the best in him.

  Thanks to Lazarus, I reverted to my typical bitchy self and didn’t give Cal that, but he found a way to succeed on his own. Maybe that was for the best. I don’t know. I’m babbling in my own mind and literally can’t wait to see that armor he built. How’d he do it? I’ve learned quite a bit about armor and armor design, but that set that killed Ultraweapon shouldn’t exist. No way! There’s not enough space on the chassis for all the things he was doing with it.

  In the barn, five Type B robots come to life. Their weapons are trained on me. I recognize a Mindwiper on one of them and know that the occupants take their privacy seriously. I calm my nerves and say, “I’m here to see Cal. It’s me, Stacy.”

  My heart thumps when they move aside and I reach the access panel.

  8675309

  The code still works! The door slides open and I step into it. After a few seconds, the door closes. Muzak starts up as the lift descends. Cute Cal. Very cute. An instrumental version of Just a Friend. How appropriate.

  At the bottom of the shaft, I compose myself as the door opens. This is it. Whatever happens next, I’ll know that the moment I remembered everything, I came running and I hope it’s enough.

  There are two guys sitting in front of the main console playing a shooter game. Neither of them is Cal. They pause the game.