The Clause

by Brian Wiprud

  I thought about smoking a Winston. I didn’t.

  Under extreme stress people sometimes stop eating and find themselves disoriented or vulnerable as their system shifts into starvation mode. Under the current situation I was probably burning half again as many calories as I normally would be. For once, I could actually chow down without throwing on extra weight, the irony being I wasn’t very hungry. I couldn’t afford to be disoriented or vulnerable, but my impulse was to push myself and get more accomplished before allowing myself to rack up needed calories and nourishment.

  Tito’s watch told me it was going on seven, and the streets of Midtown were beginning to churn with early commuters and vendors prepping their newsstands and coffee carts for the approaching Monday workforce tidal wave. If I grabbed a cab then it would get me to LaGuardia pretty fast at that hour. But I wasn’t sure Paramount Car Rental would be open that early. I had a little time.

  Maybe it was dangerous, but I took a window booth at the Athens Diner and took off my hat and sunglasses. The doorman had made me want to be normal, if only for an hour or so before I went back to being hunted.

  It was one of those enduring diners staffed by Greeks. The shapely waitress had lovely eyes, dark hair in a ponytail, and a large nose. Going through her normal routine, she, too, somehow made me feel hopeful, and normal, especially when she slid the coffee cup and saucer in front of me.

  A normal breakfast for me was a bowl of seeds and twigs in skim milk. Coffee: black.

  That wouldn’t cut it.

  “I’ll have the Ulysses breakfast skillet.”

  Twenty-five

  A yellow cab rumbled me across the Triborough Bridge and through Astoria’s mishmash of elevated trains and highways to LaGuardia Airport. The car rental places are on the lower arrivals level, which was just getting busy with flights moving businesspeople from other cities to New York. If the Serbs or the FBI or the Chinese or anybody else who might be looking for me happened to be watching the airports, they would be on the departures level above.

  Rubin was a Hasid, the variety of Jew that wears only black trousers and white collared shirts with long curls at their temples. He ran the airport branch of Paramount Car Rentals, strictly a local operation that squeezed itself in at the end past Hertz. I’d used them before because they have a wide variety of fancy cars for rent and do a brisk business with hotshots who come to town, the kind that think showing up to a real estate deal in a Maserati or Jag would boost their mojo. The kind that like disposing of undeclared cash wherever they can. Unlike the national chains, Rubin accepted cash.

  I bought a paper and sat for a while watching Paramount’s rental desk, making sure nobody else was doing the same. It seemed unlikely that the Kurac or the FBI would have thought I would rent a car. Rentals usually only accept credit cards. If I used my credit card, bad guys would know exactly where I was, they had to know I knew that. The previous night’s Plaza episode proved that. So they’d pretty much figure I’d take taxis and buses and trains.

  It helped that Paramount wasn’t that widely known at my level in the criminal world because thieves stole cars to do jobs. Paying for stuff was against their nature. To be honest, I don’t know how to boost cars and driving a stolen car seems a liability to a successful operation. You have to cover the what ifs as much as you can in an operation, and What if you get pulled over by a cop for a broken taillight? is a deal breaker. That sort of thing happens all the time. The heat has an uncanny knack for blundering into an operation just when you least expect it. Like who would have expected that woman Florrie to call the cops on me back at the Garber place?

  I’d rented an Escalade from Rubin a few years back for an operation that took me out to Long Island. I needed the room for a ladder, and an Escalade in Hampton Bays blends in. Had anybody tied the Escalade to lifting the sparks they might have jotted down the license plate and come to Rubin. But he’s the consummate businessman and understands his customers’ needs and what keeps them coming back. His customers highly value discretion. Especially when they tip him, which I did. I also sent him a card every Hanukkah and Passover. He was a good man to have on call. Trudy and I never knew when we might need a secure exit from town.

  There was a young Hasid working the Paramount counter. When their customer queue dried up, I approached. “Is Rubin in?”

  “I can help you, sir.”

  “Rubin said anytime I came by I should see him personally.”

  “Of course. His office is right in there. Have a seat, I’ll call him.”

  The small office was stacked with pink receipts, plastered with post-its with phone numbers without names. I sat in the plastic chair opposite the desk.

  “Gill?”

  He never forgot a name, so they said. The rumpled bald man in a yarmulke burst into the room, his eyes those of an insomniac.

  “Rubin, good to see you. You look well.”

  “You don’t. What’s the matter?”

  “Death in the family.”

  He clasped his face, the eyes wobbling. “I hate it when that happens. Not your mother, I hope?”

  “She’s been gone a long time. This was my aunt, not that close, but I’m executor. It’s a pain in the ass.”

  “Should I even ask about the hair? You look like some kind of crazy rock star.” Rubin flopped into his chair, pushing up on his white sleeves. Poor guy was so bald that his curls were mere wisps.

  “Sometimes it’s fun to change it up.”

  “A death in the family. That bites.” He didn’t believe a word of it, and he didn’t have to, and knew he didn’t need to. Those wild eyes told me he somehow enjoyed rubbing up against mysterious characters like me. He could fill in the blanks, though. Most people like doing something illegal so long as the risk of being caught is low.

  “What do you need? I’d love to be more sociable, but it’s Monday, and you know Mondays. All the shit that happens to people’s rentals over the weekend? Puh! Don’t get me started, ’kay?”

  “Nothing fancy, Rubin. In fact, do you have any Toyotas, like a Corolla? I’m looking for the plainest car you have.”

  “I have plain coming out of my ass.”

  “Only thing is, I need to leave it for pick-up at JFK. I know you don’t have a counter there. I can pay extra, of course.”

  “When is the pick-up?”

  “I’ll be done with it by ten tonight. I can leave it at short-term parking.”

  “Extra fifty. You can leave the keys and ticket with the parking space written on it with the attendants. I do this all the time, they work for me a little, you know? Just hand them the keys and tell them Rubin is coming to pick up, how’s that?” He clapped his hands and stood.

  I stood, too. “That works. Do I need to fill in paperwork?”

  Rubin didn’t bat an eye. “Hand me four hundred cash, I hand you the keys, and we’re done, ’kay?”

  I peeled off a thousand in hundreds and put it in his hand. “The rest is a deposit on damages, just in case.”

  Rubin pocketed the thousand and opened a desk drawer. He tossed me a key. “I don’t even rent this car. It’s just a courtesy loaner, or one my nephews use to run errands, like to pick up cars at JFK. Has a few scratches and a ton of miles, but it won’t crap out on you. It’s a Toyota sedan, plain as they come and reliable, parked in the very last spot on the right. If the car survives, leave some gas in it, ’kay?”

  “Perfect. You’re the best.”

  He clasped my hand and started off down the hall. “If I’m not the best, Hertz gets my business. I have no choice but to be the best, but thank you anyway.” He turned. “Gill?”

  I raised an eyebrow.

  He wagged a finger. “Be careful. I expect that Hanukkah card.”

  “You got it.”

  The car was right where he said it would be, gra
y and weary, but the engine was strong and the transmission tight. The AC worked, too, and despite what the doorman said, Monday looked like it was going to cook up into a hot one on all accounts. It all just had to work ten or twelve hours more.

  Tito’s watch said nine forty-five.

  Twenty-six

  DCSNet 6000 Warrant Database

  Transcript Cell Phone Track and Trace

  Peerless IP Network / Redhook Translation

  Target: Dragan Spikic

  Date: Monday, August 9, 2010

  Time: 938–941 EDT

  SPIKIC: TALK TO ME.

  VUGOVIC: THE CHINESE HAVE A DEAL WITH UNDERWOOD FOR THE GEMS, AND IT GOES DOWN TODAY SOMETIME. WE WILL BE THERE.

  SPIKIC: OUT OF MY MOTHER’S PUSSY! THE CHINESE!

  VUGOVIC: FROM HONG KONG, THE ONES WE STOLE GEMS FROM, THEY ARE SETTLING THAT SCORE. WE WILL HAVE THE GEMS BY THE END OF THE DAY. YOU CAN TELL THE ISRAELIS WE WILL BE READY TO MAKE THE EXCHANGE WITH THEM TOMORROW MORNING.

  SPIKIC: YOU SEEM PRETTY SURE OF YOURSELF, VUGO.

  VUGOVIC: WE CAME VERY CLOSE TO CORNERING HIM AT THE PLAZA LAST NIGHT, WE WERE THERE BEFORE THE CHINESE, AND TOMORROW MORNING WE WILL HAVE A MAN ON THE INSIDE WITH THE CHINESE. UNDERWOOD WENT THERE IN A CAB. WE INTERROGATED THE CAB DRIVER. UNDERWOOD HAS COLORED HIS HAIR WHITE AND NO LONGER DRIVES THE MOTORCYCLE—THE POLICE AND THE CHINESE GAVE CHASE SO HE HAD TO ABANDON IT. SO HE TOOK A CAB TO THE PLAZA AND WAS IN A ROOM ON THE THIRTEENTH FLOOR, SHOWERED AND CHANGED. FROM HIS SMELL I CAN TELL HE IS WEAKENING, HE IS NOT EATING ENOUGH PROTEIN.

  SPIKIC: WHO IS THIS CHINESE INSIDER YOU SAY YOU WILL HAVE TOMORROW MORNING?

  VUGOVIC: A PUNK NAMED SHUI FU WING WHO CHASED AND SHOT AT UNDERWOOD. THE CHINESE ARE LETTING HIM COOL OFF IN JAIL. WE WILL BAIL HIM OUT, MAKE HIM OUR FRIEND.

  SPIKIC: WHAT ABOUT THE WOMAN?

  VUGOVIC: I THINK SHE MAY HAVE DIED. I DO NOT SMELL THAT HE IS PROTECTING HER ANY LONGER.

  SPIKIC: WOULD HE HAVE SO EASILY ALLOWED HER TO EXPIRE?

  VUGOVIC: I SPOKE WITH THE CUBAN, HE SAYS HE WOULD.

  SPIKIC: ROBERTO?

  VUGOVIC: YES.

  SPIKIC: HE AGREED TO SPEAK WITH YOU?

  VUGOVIC: HE WAS NOT HAPPY WE CHIMPED HIS MAN, THOUGH CLAIMED WE DID HIM A FAVOR.

  SPIKIC: [LAUGHTER] THOSE SLEAZY CUBANS, THEY THINK THEY ARE SO CLEVER WHEN THEY ARE JUST WEAK AND USELESS SPICS.

  VUGOVIC: HE ALSO SUGGESTED THAT HE KNEW YOU WERE WANTED BY THE HAGUE.

  SPIKIC: AND WHAT DID YOU SAY?

  VUGOVIC: I ASKED HIM WHO TOLD HIM THAT AND HE SAID HE WAS JUST GUESSING.

  SPIKIC: YOU DON’T SUPPOSE HE IS PASSING INFORMATION TO THE CIA? I HEAR THAT THE CORPORATION STILL HAS CONNECTIONS.

  VUGOVIC: I ASKED ABOUT THAT ALSO, BUT HE DENIED IT. TO GET ROBERTO’S COOPERATION I OF COURSE MADE EMPTY PROMISES IN EXCHANGE FOR INFORMATION.

  SPIKIC: RELIABLE INFORMATION? CAN YOU BE SURE?

  VUGOVIC: OF COURSE I CANNOT BE SURE, BUT I HAVE MET THE CHINESE SO KNOW THAT THEY ARE AFTER UNDERWOOD JUST AS ROBERTO SAID, SO DO NOT NEED TO KNOW ANY MORE THAN THAT.

  SPIKIC: YOU MET THE CHINESE?

  VUGOVIC: AT THE PLAZA, THEY SHOWED UP AFTER US AND DID NOT INSPECT THE ROOM.

  SPIKIC: I WANT YOU TO DO WHATEVER IT TAKES, VUGO. ANYBODY GETS IN THE WAY, MOW THEM DOWN, EVEN IF IT IS OUR OWN MEN. TAKE THE GEMS BACK AND DON’T LET THEM OUT OF YOUR SIGHT. I WILL CALL THE ISRAELIS ABOUT TOMORROW AND SET IT UP

  VUGOVIC: CONSIDER IT ACCOMPLISHED.

  SPIKIC: FOR THE SAKE OF ALL MOTHERS AND THE RATS THAT INFEST THEIR PANTRY, IT HAD BETTER BE SO.

  *END*

  Twenty-seven

  EUROPEAN ORGANIZED CRIME TASK FORCE

  MEETING MINUTES

  1100 EDT MONDAY AUGUST 9, 2010

  ATTENDANCE: LOG ATTACHED

  Re: Kurac gem theft conspiracy—recent developments re: G. Underwood

  1. EOCTF Agents Brown and Acosta apprised superiors on tracing G. Underwood credit card in use to Plaza Hotel, 59th & 5th, Manhattan. Attempted intercept on 13th floor in advance of Kurac learning G. Underwood’s whereabouts. Underwood had vacated the room just prior to arrival. Room contained evidence of clothes change, discarded Jets hat, and shirt in garbage. Shower wet from bathing. Data collection device (DCD) planted in room behind television in anticipation of Kurac invasion of room. Observed Kurac enter lobby, followed shortly by members of Chinese Nee Fat Tong. Observed both groups leave premises shortly after. Returned to room to retrieve DCD. See transcript. Conversation between Kurac and Nee Fat Tong not collected, out of range.

  2. Agents Kim and Bola of Intel Surveillance section reported tactical database intel. Nee Fat Tong, Hong Kong to intercept G. Underwood for Kurac gems. Details as yet unavailable, surveillance subsystems targeting, technical complications may indicate use of Taiwanese track-scrambled cell phones. Also report signal intercept from Weehawken Police with ID of expired license plate registered to Phillip Greene engaged in high-speed chase with SUV/Hummer registered to Ping Wong Grocery Distributors, Flushing, Queens—legal enterprise of Nee Fat Tong. Conclusion: Nee Fat Tong located G. Underwood, high-speed chase was result, local police attempted to intercede and detain. Shopping center security guard crashed into SUV/Hummer and ended up in river, driver swam to safety. G. Underwood on motorcycle slipped police gauntlet through Weehawken train tunnel. SUV/Hummer intercepted attempting to pursue. G. Underwood drove motorcycle into tunnel. Occupants: Shui Fu Wing, 26, male, Chinese national, U.S. legal resident; Pat Fong, 22, male, Chinese national, U.S. work permit; Tse Mo Shin, 22, male, Chinese national, illegal alien. All linked to Nee Fat Tong. Dispatch to EOCTF Agents Brown and Acosta for field interrogation.

  3. EOCTF Agents Brown and Acosta deployed to Weehawken PD with assist from interpreter from intel surveillance. Weehawken PD assisted with interrogation of detainees Shui Fu Wing, Pat Fong, and Tse Mo Shin in separate interviews. Wing and Fong nonresponsive. Shin—fearful of deportation—became cooperative, see transcript. Summary: Nee Fat Tong arranged to purchase Britany-Swindol gems from G. Underwood, arranged for drop of passports and tickets in advance, at which time Nee Fat Tong attempted to abduct G. Underwood, resulting in high-speed chase through pedestrian areas at riverfront. Exchange for gems scheduled to occur August 9th, status currently uncertain. Shin released on bond, currently implanted as informer within Nee Fat Tong, reporting to intel surveillance. Object: To learn of Nee Fat Tong possible exchange of gems with G. Underwood.

  4. EOCTF Supervisor Palmer initiated discussion of current intentions of Kurac.

  5. Agents Kim and Bola of Intel Surveillance section reported intercepts indicate Kurac plan to bail out Shui Fu Wing, in Hudson County jail for the reckless vehicular pursuit, and use him as informer within Nee Fat Tong to track plans for exchange with G. Underwood for Britany-Swindol gems.

  6. EOCTF Supervisor Palmer initiated discussion of location of exchange, known or possible. No intel. Suggests that G. Underwood understands his predicament and needs a secure public place to perform the exchange from which he can depart to the airport and leave the country undetected. Possibilities include an airport or train station where police, TSA, and National Guard are frequent and complicating factor to an attempted abduction. Discover which transit hub, scan departure manifests for G. Underwood, or possible aliases he may have used in the past. Press informer Shin for name on passports, flight, time, etc.

  7. EOCTF Supervisor Palmer initiated discussion of injured T. Elwell condition, progress of search.

  8. EOCTF Agents Brown and Acosta apprised superiors of increasing possibility she may already be dead. G. Underwood’s continued mobility suggests he cannot be tending to an injured party, though it is possible she is not badly injured, or may have already departed the city to seek shelter elsewhere. Kurac intercepts indicate they also believe she may be dead. T. Elw
ell no longer seems germane to a study of G. Underwood’s whereabouts or possibility of a safe house.

  9. Intel Profiler Agent Laurenta provided input on G. Underwood M.O. based on previous observations and recent activity. Anticipated multilayered subterfuge not yet apparent but should not be discounted. Essential he does not discover FBI is a factor in blocking his escape and using him to draw the other parties together for the exchange. Based on his military applications of Sun Tzu text “Art of War” it should be anticipated that G. Underwood will use the Kurac and the Nee Fat Tong at cross purposes to help effect his escape. If it is suspected that G. Underwood is aware of the Justice Department involvement he will likely attempt to enact a “cascade” in which each pursuer eliminates or paralyzes the other until there is only one pursuer. If this exchange takes place in a public arena such as an airport the situation could turn explosive, resulting in civilian casualties.

  10. EOCTF Agents Brown and Acosta apprised superiors of G. Underwood “Screen Man” van impoundment and inventory—see attached for full inventory. Contents of van primarily related to making and repairing screens. Late-model Dell laptop computer discovered in compartment under driver’s seat. Electronics forensic unit to report today on contents of hard drive, browser history, etc.

  11. EOCTF Supervisor Palmer scheduled reconvene Monday 9th @ 1500 EDT.

  ******************MEETING ADJOURNED******************

  Twenty-eight

  I parked on a Manhattan side street in the Twenties and made my way through busy sidewalks to the elevator bank in an old factory building on Broadway.

  Removing my trilby, I exited the elevator directly into the fly shop. To my right by the windows: all kinds of specialty clothing and fly rods. Straight ahead: books and an island of cubbies filled with feathers tied on small hooks. Left: outerwear, boots, waders, fly-tying tools, and supplies. Farther left: “May I help you?”