Summer Girl, Winter Boy

by Elsborg, Barbara

  Jai glanced at Summer. “No, I’m sorry.”

  Graham tugged at his wife’s sleeve. “Kathryn, don’t. You promised.”

  Everything started to spin and the world lost focus. Summer felt as if she were the only thing that couldn’t move. Kathryn stepped closer to Jai but her husband took her arm before she could speak.

  “Enough,” Graham said and pulled her away.

  “Are you all right?” Jai whispered.

  No.

  Jai wrapped his arms around her and pulled her back against his chest. “It’s okay. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere. Just breathe.”

  She sucked in a lungful of air and trembled.

  “You want to go back to your room?” he said in her ear.

  She shook her head.

  “Tell me what’s wrong. Who was that couple?”

  “I killed their son. He was supposed to marry Angie.”

  “What? Oh shit. That’s why you didn’t want to come to the wedding? Why you don’t get on with your family? What happened?”

  A gong sounded, Summer jumped and everyone stopped chattering.

  “Please move to the tables,” announced the master of ceremonies. “Be upstanding for the bride and groom.”

  Summer was grateful to be seated as far as possible from the bride. She and Jai were with people she didn’t know. Jai switched name cards—his said “Summer’s guest”—so that he was next to her and he still didn’t let go of her hand. Even when her sister and Tim were applauded, he kept hold of her fingers.

  Once they were seated, she put her mouth to his ear, though the noise from the nearby heater would stop anyone overhearing. “I was giving Angie’s fiancé a lift from Canterbury station. Their wedding was the next day. The car crashed and he died.”

  “Oh Summer.” He kissed her neck and she sighed into his shoulder.

  “You can imagine what it was like. Angie had to be hospitalized, she was so distraught.”

  “That was why you went away for so long?”

  She nodded. “When the chance was offered, I leapt at it. Everyone blamed me for the accident. I was driving. The road was straight. The weather was fine. There was nothing wrong with the car. It had to be my fault. I mean, everyone knows I didn’t do it deliberately, but all that mattered was that I’d been driving, he’d died and I hadn’t. But…”

  “But what?”

  Steaming bowls of basil-and-tomato soup were put in front of them and Summer mechanically lifted a roll from the bread basket proffered by the waitress.

  “How did the accident happen?” Jai asked.

  “I told the police I’d been distracted by a fox running across the road, but it wasn’t true. I couldn’t tell anyone the real reason I crashed. I still can’t.”

  “Tell me.”

  She chewed her lip. “Doug was making all these lewd suggestions, saying he wanted to fuck me. Once last chance to have me before he married Angie. He was a lech. He was always catching me in quiet places and trying to make a move. It was just the way he was. But that time, he put his hand up my dress and tried to push his fingers in my panties. He ripped them, I struggled, lost control of the car and crashed.”

  “Oh Christ.”

  The relief in telling someone made her lightheaded, and as if Jai sensed it, he put his arm around her.

  “You understand why I couldn’t say anything?” she whispered.

  “Yes. For a start, you probably wouldn’t have been believed. And if you had been believed, you’d have doubled your sister’s grief.”

  “There was no right thing to do. Whatever I did, it would be wrong.” She swallowed hard.

  “You should tell your mother.”

  Summer shook her head. “Never. I thought about telling my father, but he’d tell my mother and she’d convince him I was lying. Eighteen months away wasn’t long enough. I’m only a bridesmaid because it would have looked bad if I wasn’t. This way, it appears as if I’ve been forgiven but I never will be. My mum and Angie have always been close. She was almost more upset than Angie when Doug died and I know that sounds crazy. Then the guy I was going out with dumped me because I was such a misery. Not a good time.”

  “Your sister looks happy enough.”

  “Tim’s a much nicer guy than Doug. She’s better off with him. But I can’t tell her that.”

  Jai began to eat his soup. “Maybe she already knows.”

  * * * * *

  After the meal and the speeches were over—and Summer had been tense throughout as she’d listened, just in case something was said but it wasn’t—the dancing began.

  “Are you going to be okay while I nip to the loo?” Jai asked. “Or do you want to come with me?”

  “I’m fine. It’s too cold out there.”

  He’d no sooner disappeared than her father slipped into the seat next to her. “I hear your young man is a top model.”

  “I didn’t know that when I met him.”

  Her father leaned to whisper in her ear. “I suspect he takes drugs. Be careful.”

  Summer gave a shocked gasp. “Why would you say that?”

  “His pupils are dilated.”

  “It’s dark in here. Pupils dilate when the light’s low.”

  “Not so much. Don’t get trawled up in that world, Summer. I don’t want you to get hurt.”

  “I’ve never seen him take anything.”

  “How long have you known him?”

  She bit her lip.

  “Just be careful. That’s all I wanted to say.”

  * * * * *

  Jai followed the signs to the restrooms. He wasn’t sure whether her revelation made it easier for him to tell her about Saul and Marta or not, but he didn’t want any secrets between them. She’d trusted him, he could trust her.

  There was the minor issue of Summer being the only one hurt by the lie she’d told, whereas Jai would hurt more than Summer if he revealed the truth. I’m fucked, whatever I do.

  A couple of guys stood holding bottles of champagne and smoking outside the Portakabin and he walked up the steps past them. There were still there when he came out and he stopped.

  “Are you friends or relatives?” he asked.

  “Friends of Angie. We work with her. Barristers. Want to swap jobs?” one man replied.

  “I wish I could.”

  “No, you don’t. Do you know Naomi Campbell or Kate Moss?”

  Yes. “No. Did you know Angie’s former fiancé?”

  “Yeah, met him a few times.”

  “What was he like?”

  The two guys looked at each other and laughed. “A tosser,” the other man confirmed.

  “What sort of tosser?”

  The taller of the two men frowned. “Why are you asking?”

  “Because he’s going out with Angie’s sister,” said the other. “The one who was driving the car.”

  “Between you and me, Angie’s better off with Tim. He’s more of a lapdog. Doug was just a dog.” The men laughed.

  Jai hesitated. “It wouldn’t surprise you that Doug stuck his hand up Summer’s dress just before they crashed?”

  The pair glanced at each other and the taller one spoke. “No. It wouldn’t.”

  Jai walked back to Summer, wondering if he’d done the right thing. He wasn’t checking up on what Summer had said, he was trying to right a wrong, but he had a horrible suspicion he might have made things worse.

  “One dance before bed?” Summer asked.

  Jai took her hand and led her onto the dance floor. They moved in and out of each other’s arms, and the broad smile on Summer’s face sent his plan to tell her about Saul and the rest into reverse. Not tonight. She was too happy. It wasn’t fair.

  Hardly fair to keep quiet though, is it?

  I’ll tell her another day.

  You believed her, she’ll believe you.

  But would she understand?

  One dance slid into two and then three. But when, out of the corner of his eye, Jai saw a scowling bride
heading toward them, his heart slammed onto his stomach and he tried to get Summer to move away. She twirled, caught sight of her sister’s face and stopped dancing.

  Angie smacked Summer so hard across the cheek, her head snapped to the side. Jai wrapped his arm around Summer and pulled her out of reach.

  “There was no call for that,” he barked. “Don’t touch her.”

  “You couldn’t let me have today?” Angie spat out the words.

  Tim came up behind her and tried to pull her back. People around them stopped dancing.

  “I want to leave.” Summer turned her face into Jai’s chest. “I want to go now.”

  Angie grabbed her arm and yanked her out of Jai’s grasp. “You’re a liar and a slut!” She looked at Jai. “She’s already killed two fiancés. Mine and hers. I’d run if I were you.”

  Summer hung her head and hurried through the parting crowd toward the exit. Jai sped after her. When he took her hand and she let him, he sighed in relief. She headed down the lantern-lit path to the barn and climbed the stairs. She stumbled when she reached the bedroom and fell to her knees. The dog jumped up at her and Summer stroked his head.

  “It’s okay, Winnie. Go back to bed.”

  “That was my fault,” Jai said. “I’m sorry.”

  He lifted Summer from the floor and sat with her on the bed.

  “How was it your fault?”

  “A couple of guys by the restrooms, work colleagues of Angie’s, I asked them about Doug. They said he was a tosser and I told them he stuck his hand up your dress just before the crash.”

  She shuddered. “Oh god. I thought she was mad because I’d brought you and everyone was looking at you.”

  His shoulders slumped. “I’ve fucked up, haven’t I?”

  She turned to face him and stroked his cheek with her fingers. “Your timing was a bit crap.”

  He wrapped his hands around hers. “If you’re going to be hated, you might as well be hated for the truth as for a lie. You’ve suffered enough.”

  They both looked up at a bang on the door. Winston started to bark.

  “Come in,” Summer said.

  When her father walked in, Jai let Summer go and rose to his feet.

  “Have I ruined the wedding?” Summer whispered.

  “No. Angie is dancing with Tim. He’ll keep her calm. They’re going to cut the cake in ten minutes. He threatened to push her face in it if she didn’t lose her snarl. The man’s got more gumption than I gave him credit for.” He looked at Jai and raised his eyebrows.

  “It was my fault,” Jai said. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.”

  “I rather suspect you were,” her father said and sat next to Summer. “Did Doug assault you?”

  “Yes.”

  Her father sighed. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “Because I didn’t want to make things worse.”

  He put his hand on Summer’s knee. “It didn’t strike you that you might have made things better? That your sister wouldn’t have spent so long grieving for a man who didn’t deserve her?”

  “I thought it would hurt more if she knew what Doug was like.”

  “You ran away instead.”

  “It wasn’t just because of Angie. You’re friends with Doug’s parents. How could his mother cope with hearing what her son was like? She wouldn’t believe it and say I was trying to push the blame onto him. Angie would have said the same.”

  “Oh sweetheart. It’s true Kathryn wouldn’t have believed you. What mother could? But I would have believed you.” He patted her on the knee and rose to his feet. “Come on, Winston. You can go back in the house now.”

  He beckoned to Jai, signaling he wanted to talk to him. Jai stepped out of the room and closed the door.

  “I should be grateful this has come into the open, but today was not the right time.”

  “I know. I’m sorry,” Jai mumbled.

  “Angelina will get over it. It’s up to her what she chooses to believe. I hope she’ll come to the right conclusion. But Summer…she’s kept this secret for almost two years. I don’t want her hurt any more, you understand?”

  “Yes.”

  “It hasn’t escaped my attention that you are the one with whom she shared her secret. I hope you understand the significance of that.”

  Jai nodded. “I do.”

  “If you’re playing with her, stop it.”

  “I’m not playing.” His stomach lurched.

  “But you’re fooling around with drugs.”

  Jai forced himself not to look away. “I’m on prescribed medication for anxiety and depression. I’m not…good at taking it when I should. Summer’s made me think I don’t need it.”

  “You should come off it gradually.”

  “I know.”

  “And if you’re taking anything else, stop it now. Straighten yourself out or I won’t think you deserve my daughter.”

  He walked down the stairs and Jai swallowed hard. Oh shit.

  Chapter Fourteen

  When Jai went back into the room, he found Summer sitting where he’d left her but she’d taken off her shoes.

  “The door is pretty thin,” she said.

  “Ah.”

  “My dad’s a doctor.”

  “Double ah.” Fuck. “I like him because he cares about you and isn’t afraid to show it.”

  She smiled. “Sorry I’m so messed up. I bet you thought I was some nice, simple girl and I’ve dragged you into international drug trafficking and a nightmare family.”

  He sat beside her and took her hand. “And incredible sex, so I can forgive you anything.”

  “One more thing to tell you and I’m done because I don’t think I can cope with any more tonight.”

  “Okay.”

  “The death of my fiancé.”

  “I forgot about that.” He hadn’t.

  She let out a groan. “I didn’t kill him, but it suits Angie to say I did. I was in my first year of university. Eighteen years old and I fell hard for the first guy who asked me out. Pete was a third-year geography student. We’d only been together for three months when he asked me to marry him in front of all his friends.

  “I said yes, more because I didn’t want to embarrass him than anything else, but I really wasn’t ready for marriage. The next day, we went walking in the New Forest and I told him I didn’t want to marry him. I was going to explain why, that it was too soon and we needed to be sure, but he…staggered backward, tripped on a branch, fell and banged his head on a jagged rock. Such a simple thing and such a small rock, but he was knocked unconscious. There was no bloody phone reception and after I’d put him in the recovery position, I ran to get help. By the time the emergency services reached him, he’d died.”

  Jai pulled her closer and rested his chin on her head. “I don’t suppose you told anyone you’d just broke the news you didn’t want to marry him?”

  “What good would it have done? They’d have thought I was a bitch. I was a bitch. Because he’d died, I couldn’t go out with someone else without looking callous. I had a miserable year and even when I did go out with another boy, there always seemed to be one of Pete’s friends around to frown at me. I felt like such a cow.”

  “Summer!”

  “I’m not sad about it now. I’m sorry Pete’s dead, of course I am. I really did like him, but accidents happen. God, that will be on my gravestone—‘accidents happen’.” She looked up into his eyes. “Bed. Now. Me. You. No more talking. No more confessions. Even if you want to tell me you’re actually from outer space and want to take me home to experiment on.”

  His nightmare could wait. Nothing miraculous was going to happen before tomorrow unless Saul and Marta spontaneously combusted, and selfishly, he wanted one last night with Summer because deep down, he feared it might be the last.

  He helped her out of her dress and when she stood in front of him in just a pair of little red panties with lace sides, the breath caught in his throat.

  “I want…�
�� She pressed her lips together.

  “What?”

  “Will you keep your suit on for a while?”

  He smiled. “If I can unfasten this bow tie.”

  “Let me do it.”

  While her fingers were busy at his neck, he slid his hands to her hips and over her butt, hooking his thumbs under the lace. She unraveled the bow tie, undid his top button and left the tie hanging around his neck. She held on to the ends and pulled his head toward hers.

  “Do you think you could love me?” she whispered.

  Jai felt a surge of emotion so strong his heart felt twice its normal size.

  “Yes,” he muttered into her hair. “Yes, I could love you.”

  I already love you. He was worried that if he lost her, he wouldn’t stop loving her. He wanted to tell her he loved her. He’d never said that to any woman before, but he kept the words locked up in his head. Not that he thought he was going to stumble and knock himself out, but the timing had to be right and his timing currently sucked.

  “Could you love me up against the wall?” she whispered.

  He laughed.

  “Er…and facing the wall?” she asked.

  “Standing on my head and playing the violin at the same time?”

  “Could you? That would be so great.”

  She smiled and he thought he’d do anything for one of her smiles. Anything for one of her kisses. Anything to keep her.

  He nudged her across the room until she leaned against the wall, then he slid a hand around the back of her head. As he stroked the nape of her neck with his thumb, she pulled on the ends of his bow tie to bring him closer and he tilted his head and lowered his mouth to hers.

  Their noses touched, their mouths brushed and his cock pushed harder against his zipper. Her lips were so soft, she smelled so sweet and taster even sweeter, but he wanted this moment to last. He licked the curve of her upper lip, kissed his way over her cheek and tugged on the lobe of her ear with his teeth. He nibbled, taking all of it in his mouth, teasing with his tongue until the breathy cries that erupted from her throat made his head spin.

  “You’re so cute,” he whispered.

  He scraped his teeth over her upper lip and sucked on it before he switched to her lower lip and did the same thing. He ignored the demands of his cock to get inside her—now. He loved kissing her, loved making her wild for him, loved her. Oh Christ. Her breathing was rapid, her pulse racing like his.