Starbright: The Complete Series

by Hilary Thompson

  I still think we could solve the puzzle better together, but I’m so alone here. I refuse to become even more vulnerable by sharing what little I have left.

  Tariel asks a few other questions about my health, then sighs. Rising to leave, she presses her palm to the new lock on my leg bindings and it snicks open. As soon as she’s gone, I’m at the window, and as soon as she exits the building, I’m out my door and knocking at Hesten’s.

  She opens the door and glowers at me, but doesn’t turn away.

  “Can we go for a walk, please?” I ask.

  She shrugs and gathers her shoes and a wide-brimmed hat. Most of the Elysians refuse to go outside while the sun is at its strongest, but Hesten just grudgingly dons a wide-brimmed hat and leads me where I want to go.

  I think she’s curious more than helpful, but I’ll take what I can get – the one time I tried to walk on my own, Alecta found me and steered me back, ensuring I stepped on all the wrong crystals. I was nearly crawling by the time I reached my room.

  Still, I’ve gained enough of the path to explore the city a bit, and that’s what I want to do now. Hesten trails me, as always. At first, she walked by my side, but when I continued to ask her questions, she slipped back farther and farther, and now she stays far enough behind to avoid speaking.

  She also doesn’t warn me when I veer off the path, so I keep my eyes to the concrete and follow the crystals carefully.

  We walk to my favorite place – the edge of the concrete to watch the sea. I’m told the sea is off-limits to anyone who is not on something called a sabbatical, but that just makes me want to touch its white foamy power even more.

  Fat white birds sail above me, and there is a faint breeze that brings the salty air directly to me. It reminds me of the water in the womb, though, and I cover my nose with the scrap of cloth I keep soaked in the rose-scented lotion from the bathroom.

  I stare at the horizon, my eyes trying to divide sky from water.

  “There’s a boat!” I say, suddenly realizing what I’m looking at. Hesten rises and comes closer, her curiosity drawing her near.

  “The sabbatical is returning,” she says. “There will be three on the boat. Captain Javan’s partner Lukas, an elder named Barnaby, and the Lady Thema.”

  I startle at the last name – I’ve heard that name before, and now I really need to talk with Lexan: the woman supposedly sitting in that tiny speck of bark is the woman we hope is Zarea’s mother.

  “Can I meet them?” I ask. “Where will they dock?”

  “It may take them another few days to dock. They are not allowed to row except to adjust course. They must allow the waves to bring them home. It is part of the journey.”

  I make a disgusted noise, about to spout off just what I think of Elysium and all their journeys, but the chimes sound for lunch. Hesten turns immediately and turns to walk toward the dining hall, obliging me to follow.

  She refuses to answer more of my questions, and as soon as she has seen me safely delivered to the table where the Prophet is already sitting, she vanishes.

  Happy to be rid of me, I’m sure.

  “I do not think you are truly conquering the path,” the Prophet says to me as soon as I sit in my usual spot.

  “Hello. How are you doing? I’m just fine, thanks,” I return, mocking his abruptness. He glares at me over his fork. “Anyways, I don’t know what more you want from me. I have cleared each introduction of crystal. Mastered the pain. And Tariel still won’t let me continue,” I protest, claiming one of the soft, sweet rolls made from a dark, yeasty mix. What more will he have me do?

  “The pain of the body is important. Yet I sense this was never what you feared.”

  I consider him for a long moment, appreciating the simple flavor of the bread. “No. I’m not afraid of physical pain.” A memory flits into my mind, of the afternoon Lexan’s control slipped and he punched me, giving me my first black eye. I actually grin at that one.

  The Prophet sighs, sounding much older than he truly is. I feel like a scolded child, but really – I’ve done everything they’ve asked me to.

  “It’s not my fault if the path works differently for me,” I point out.

  “This is a good point,” Alecta’s voice answers from behind me. I startle, dropping my knife in the process. The eldest Sister is not my favorite.

  She sits, pouring herself a tall glass of the freshly-squeezed lemon and orange juice that accompanies every meal here. As always, its sweet tang causes my stomach to churn, remembering Hade’s special fondness for the fruit. I close my eyes against the sensation, but this only makes the scent stronger, and the blackness swirls behind my lids. I snap my eyes open before I can imagine his laughter.

  “We have finally heard word from Tartarus,” Alecta says, and I sit up straighter, managing to tuck away my glare in a show of politeness. “Irana and her guardian are traveling here. They will be here within a few days, I expect.”

  “But they were to lead the people of Tartarus–” I begin.

  “Plans and prophecies may always change,” the Prophet says, cutting me off with a hard stare. I wonder what has changed – this certainly isn’t the first time I’ve noticed the glances between him and the Sisters. “We have lost two messengers to the rage of the elements beyond our city. So Irana is needed here. Now.”

  “You have done your part with Tartarus for now,” Alecta tells me in a strangely soothing tone. “Now you must trust others to do their parts. Focus on your mastery of the path.”

  I groan. The path – always the path. I’d like to path these people–

  The Prophet pushes his chair from the table with a noise of frustration, and he strides through the slit in the curtain. Gone before I can even ask why.

  I turn to Alecta. “What was that about?”

  She smiles as though she has a secret she is enjoying keeping from me. “Something has happened. Something changed.”

  Then she, too, leaves, and I am alone at the oval table with an entire basket of sweet rolls and a pitcher of disgusting juice.

  I tuck the basket under my arm and exit the curtain, not even bothering to look around for Hesten. I’m halfway across the room when she catches up, trailed by a blond boy about our age.

  I ignore them both until we are outside, then I whirl to face her, backing her beneath a shade tree. She throws her hands before her face in fear and the boy moves to block her, glaring at me.

  “Please help me,” I say plainly, reaching to set the basket of rolls on a bench. “Just listen, please,” I say to both of them, taking a small step backward and clasping my hands around my ribs. “I know you’ve been taught to fear me or whatever, but I’m just a girl like you. Trapped in the orders of someone more powerful than me. I need someone…”

  Hesten plunks onto the bench under the tree, and the boy joins her, though his scowl hasn’t yet softened. Still, I take these as good signs, so I keep talking.

  “Lexan – the boy I came here with – I can’t even go see him. He’s my…we’re going to be joined one day. And I need to talk to Lady Thema, because she can help my friend. And the Prophet knows something about our other friends, but he won’t tell me, and I don’t even know the middle Sister’s name…” I trail away, realizing I’m babbling and the two of them are looking at me in amusement now.

  “I’m Kesh,” the boy says in a kind voice, offering his hand. I move to shake it just as Hesten tries to bat it away, and for a moment all of our hands are joined. I feel the strange, tingling sensation pass between all of us, and Kesh’s eyes grow as wide as the brown rolls sitting next to him. He withdraws his hand, running his fingers along his palm.

  “You really are…” he says in a whisper, then stops, his face flushed.

  “I’m what? Just what is this strange feeling that you both get when I touch you?” I say, trying to keep my voice from being overly demanding.

  They look at each other for a few long seconds, and I consider just giving up and walking away.


  Then Hesten sighs in defeat, and I bite back a smile – maybe I’ve finally broken through to her. “Part of the teachings are that gods and goddesses can cause pleasure or pain with a single touch – just like the crystals.”

  “Like a living crystal!” Kesh interjects excitedly. I try very, very hard not to sigh because I’ve stopped correcting people about my goddess status altogether. For Elysium, it seems that maidens and goddesses are the same.

  “So my touch causes pleasure,” I say, wrapping my head around the oddly personal words.

  “Yes, but I haven’t felt pain from you,” Hesten answers warily. I lower my eyes so she can’t see the guilt I know is there.

  “I know I can do that, too,” is all I say, thinking of the courtyard full of dead and charred corpses, so many weeks ago in Tartarus.

  “We can sneak you past Tariel,” Kesh says suddenly, as if he’s just made a decision. “She’s my cousin. I can keep her talking for a couple of minutes while you find Lexan. He’ll either be in his room or in the womb.”

  “I can’t go into the air building yet,” I point out.

  “But I can,” he assures me.

  “I haven’t seen him taken to the womb in a few days,” Hesten says. “Perhaps his rest period is almost over.”

  Hurriedly, we make a plan. They seem strangely excited to be helping me. Hesten delivers me to my room, and before she leaves, I whisper, “Thank you. Even if it doesn’t work, thank you.” She nods, flushing, and allows the door to click shut. I pull my chair to the window and sit, waiting for Kesh to appear in the courtyard below.

  I wait a long time, watching the crowds of brightly-dressed people come and go from the dining hall. Finally it is the hottest part of the day, when most of Elysium stays in their rooms, practicing music or whatever else they do to keep the city running.

  Kesh’s blond hair flashes below the window, and I hear Hesten knock on the wall that separates our living spaces.

  Seconds later, there is a soft knock on my door, and she’s waiting. We walk silently but quickly down the stairs and out to meet Kesh, and although the footing is treacherous for me, we try to stay as close to the buildings as possible.

  “If we walk the main path, someone will see us and probably stop us,” Kesh apologizes as I wince in pain after stepping on the wrong color of crystal. I just wave him away, concentrating on breathing.

  Finally we are at the building that houses the womb, and we slip inside. Kesh shows me where to wait and hurries to find Tariel. I hear their voices and her laughter, then Hesten tugs on my arm, showing me the door to Lexan’s womb chamber.

  Once she closes the door after me, it’s pitch black even outside the womb, and I call a bit of flame. The room is silent except for the soft whir of the monitors feeding information to Tariel’s station behind the glass.

  “Lexan,” I whisper, opening the small door in the capsule. He jerks as the tiny amount of firelight enters the space. I reach in and touch his shoulder. “It’s me – I snuck in to find you.”

  He shudders away from my fingers, and rolls so he can see me. It almost seems as though he doesn't have the strength to push up and out of the dark water covering his body.

  He blinks his eyes up at me, though, and I see comprehension begin to form.

  “Trea,” he says, his voice a mess of cracks and broken places.

  “I have someone helping me – they’re keeping Tariel occupied so I could talk to you. Lexan, something’s different!” I’m rushing through the words, but I really don’t know what to even say. “The Prophet and the Sisters, they know something’s changed in the prophecy. I can’t get any answers, and I’m not allowed to come see you and…”

  “It’s okay,” he sighs, reaching an arm to rest on the edge of the womb. I grip his arm with both hands, wishing I could send him more power. “I’ve seen it too…cracks in my visions. Blurry lines.” He pauses and I rub my fingers along his shoulders, trying to ease the tension there. “I don’t know what it means, but I feel it too. My mother…” He takes a deep breath as if to rally himself. “She keeps coming to me in my visions, Trea. Something’s wrong at home. I never should have made us come here first. I need to get home.”

  His voice dissolves into a fit of coughing, and even though the guilt in his voice is killing me, I know Lexan isn’t going anywhere soon. He’s barely progressed in this stupid path, and I don’t know how to help him. For once, I’m the stronger of the two of us, and I have no idea how to handle this.

  So I change the subject.

  “Lexan, the Lady Thema is on her way back from some trip – I’ll try to find her and talk to her about Zarea. You might have to keep doing what they ask for now, but please be careful. Don’t let Tariel–”

  Footsteps and whispers abruptly fill the room as Hesten hurries in. “We have to go!” she says, waving at me to follow her.

  “I’ll try to come back soon. You can do this, Lexan,” I say, and bend to press a quick kiss on his damp forehead. It’s salty, and I wonder if it’s sweat or the salt water he’s been resting in, for he feels feverish as well.

  Hesten and I duck out of the room and down the hallway, slipping inside a nearby closet as I hear Tariel’s impatient voice advancing toward us.

  Kesh is stalling her, but she’s growing irritated. Finally, the voices stop and the hallway is quiet.

  “Hesten,” he whispers into the silence. We ease open the door and hurry out of the building as fast as we can.

  I have no idea if we helped Lexan, but at least now I know he’s whole and coherent.

  And yet I don’t feel better, because his desperate worry about his mother swirls in my mind like a dark cloud.

  Just as we enter the courtyard, I see the Three Sisters gliding toward me, all in a terrifying line. I turn to Hesten and Kesh and send them scurrying with just a glance and a flick of fire at my wrist. I don’t mean to add to their fear, but they shouldn't be here to take the blame for my plan.

  “I see you have disturbed Lexan while he was pursuing the path,” Alecta begins, circling around to my side. Tisiphone paces to my other side, leaving the middle Sister staring directly at me.

  For a brief moment, I worry that they might be here to do more than just ask questions.

  Then Alecta laughs, and the other two snap their eyes to her. “Lexan has just finished the air portion of his path. Perhaps your visit has sustained him after all.”

  “What are you talking about? How do you even know…” I just stop and shake my head. They’re obviously not playing by the same rules of existence that I have to.

  “Can you see what has happened in Asphodel?” I ask instead, wondering if their sight reaches beyond the desert and beneath the ground.

  Tisiphone shakes her head. “The Prophet is the only one who sees beyond Elysium. And our sight is limited to a person’s progress of the path. You have earned this much, Astrea,” she says, more to her Sisters than to me.

  “When will I complete my path?” I ask.

  “I can instruct Tariel to allow you to skip the water and begin the air path today, if you wish,” Tisiphone answers. “But be aware that even once you complete air and water, you are not finished with your journey.”

  “The fifth element,” I say, remembering the strange, multi-colored shape I’ve seen on one of the buildings.

  A building nobody ever enters or exits, save the Sisters and the Prophet.

  “I want to start now,” I decide, and the three of them nod in unison, pleased with something I’ve done for once. They didn’t warn me not to use my fire, so perhaps now they think my power is valuable to the process, and not just a cheat.

  They lead me past the same room I was in only minutes ago, but the door stands open, showing that Lexan has already been taken away. Soon I’m sliding down into the familiar, wet darkness, closing my eyes even before Tariel closes the lid.

  I can handle this pain. Physical pain is nothing to me after the pain I’ve caused other people, and the murder in my soul
.

  Physical pain is what I deserve.

  And if Hade finds me despite my fire, I will just have to learn to deal with him dead, as I learned to deal with him alive.

  ELEVEN

  LEXAN

  October 25, 2066

  Aisa is becoming more and more disturbed, and I think it’s because I took her to see Evangeline. Perhaps she’s just too young to understand or realize how important all of this is. She seems to think it’s just a game. She even makes up dreams and prophecies of her own now, trying to convince Clota and me that her sight is real. It’s possible, I guess. But Evangeline told me the gods rarely gift more than one in a family, and I know what I see in my own dreams. If there’s a prophet in our family, it’s me. I just don’t always know what my dreams mean.

  From First Leader Lakessa’s personal journal

  Included in Firene’s secret papers

  Tariel can’t decide if she’s angry because Trea snuck past her, or overjoyed that I finally mastered a crystal. Even after a full night’s rest I’m too exhausted to remind her that it was my own element’s crystal.

  I just focus on charm – and she grudgingly allows me to go to breakfast in the dining hall.

  She keeps a strong arm around me as we walk past the curtain, and I settle heavily in my chair. Tariel bows to the Prophet and scurries away.

  “Lady Thema has returned from her sabbatical,” he says by way of greeting. “On Astrea’s request, I have asked her to meet with you, but she does not want to talk. Perhaps you can convince her.”

  “I can try,” I answer. “Can Trea be there too?”

  “Yes,” answers Tisiphone as she enters the curtained area. “She finished the air crystal path last night, and she is resting now.”

  I glance down at my bowl of grains and fruit. Why is Trea able to barrel through these paths, and not me?

  “How can I improve?” I ask quietly. The Prophet smiles.