I turned to my human friends. Both of them appeared to be knocked for a loop. Their eyes were rolled up into their heads, showing only the whites, but they were still breathing. Fortunately, within a couple of seconds, they both started blinking and groaning. They were coming out of it, hopefully with not much worse than a headache to show for their troubles. That was good because I didn’t have time to tend to them. Vampires like François – which covered just about all vampires – were predators, and the last thing you wanted to do with any predator was show them weakness.
I stood up and casually dusted myself off, acting as if my head didn’t feel like it had the New York Philharmonic playing in it. I walked up to Sally and quickly snapped my fingers in front of her face. No response. I turned back to François, smiling, and said, “Cute. But it doesn’t work on me.”
“I see that,” he replied and then matched my grin with his own. “But it is painfully obvious to me that though I can’t control you, I can hurt you.” Oh, crap. Guess I needed to work on my poker face a bit.
I stood my ground and said nothing. François stepped forward, into my personal space, and continued. “Shall we try it again? I for one would be curious to see how many times it would take for me to liquefy your brain.”
I was about to make a witty comment regarding his breath, but just then, the barrel of Ed’s shotgun was laid over my shoulder, pointing directly at François’s face.
“I don’t know, but I’m willing to bet it would take just one bullet to knock that smile off your face, permanently,” Ed’s said from behind me. “And in case you’re wondering, yes, they’re silver.”
I shifted my eyes to the gun barrel and then back to François, grinning even wider. “What’s that you were saying about my advisors being moot?”
The smile dropped from his face and, apparently with it, his concentration. The vampires behind him began shaking their heads. I had little doubt Sally and Nergui were doing the same.
I could see out of the corner of my eye that we were attracting a small crowd of onlookers. Vampires and Bigfeet alike were starting to gather round, not to mention some other ... err ... things that I couldn’t readily identify. Guess they weren’t shitting me about there being other guests in attendance.
François was a cock-meat sandwich of the highest order, but he wasn’t stupid. Whatever his agenda, he knew that the bullshit we were engaged in now wasn’t going to help our position. Almost as if reading my mind, he suddenly started laughing. It almost sounded genuine.
“Well played, Freewill,” he sang out in an exaggerated voice that everyone in the immediate vicinity picked up. “An excellent demonstration! With you at our vanguard, our enemies will think twice before trying anything.”
I shifted my eyes around. Sure enough, the tension seemed to have gone out of the onlookers. Thinking this was a staged display, they quickly began to go back about their business.
“Slick,” I whispered.
“Necessary,” he replied, equally quiet. “Letting your oafishness give our enemies the advantage would be to all of our detriment.”
“Are we done here?” I asked, at which point Ed finally lowered the gun. I was glad he hadn’t been given reason to use it. Regardless of whether it would have done much to François, I didn’t relish the thought of a twelve gauge shotgun going off right next to my head.
“For now,” François said with a sneer. “The sun will be up soon. I will return tomorrow night for the opening talks.”
“You’re not staying here?”
“In this place?” he asked, the snooty Frenchman in him coming to the forefront. “I think not. Enjoy the accommodations.” He spun on his heel, nodded to his companions, and together they began to walk away.
He turned his head back to us only once. “Remember my warning: you are a figurehead here. Nothing more.” Before I could reply with anything snippy, he and his contingent strode away. That was fine with me. It gave me a chance to let out a large breath that felt like I had been holding for hours.
“Now there goes a true asshole,” Tom commented, still looking a little dazed from the compulsion. “And no, I don’t care if he can hear me.”
“For once we’re in agreement,” Sally added. She then turned to me, and said in as serious of a tone as I’d ever seen her use, “We need to watch out for him, Bill. He’s bad business. I don’t think I’ve ever met another vamp as strong as he is.”
“You don’t need to tell me that. I’m not so sure his little threat about turning my head to mush would’ve been entirely idle. Thanks for the save, Ed. I owe you.”
“Just one?” he replied with a coy grin.
We all chuckled. “Nice bluff about the silver bullets, by the way.”
“It wasn’t a bluff.”
“No? Where the hell did you get silver bullets?”
“I gave them to him,” Sally said. “Since that business a few months back,” she gestured slightly in Nergui’s direction, “I figured it was a good idea for you guys to have a little extra backup. So I had them specially made.”
“You did?”
“Yeah, I gave them to Ed the last time we met for coffee.”
“Sally gives the sweetest gifts,” he said with an exaggerated grin.
“Hold it!” I interrupted. “What do you mean, ‘last time you met for coffee?’ I thought you guys only went on one date?”
“Well, technically, coffee isn’t a date,” Sally said with a huffy sniff.
“And neither of you told me why?”
“Well you kinda freaked out the last time,” Ed replied.
“Oh, please,” Sally said. “I don’t require that you keep me up to date on your social life, nonexistent as it is.”
“She has a point, dude,” Ed added.
As we continued bickering, a small part of my brain couldn’t help but notice that there we were, the fate of the world in the balance, and the most important thing on any of our minds was who was secretly dating whom – like some fucked up episode of Friends.
Goddamn, the world was so screwed.
Strangers in the Night
The show over – for now at least – Nergui showed us to our hut. Yes, they intended for us all to share one. None of us was particularly happy with that, especially Sally. When she found out, she opened her handbag and produced a very familiar looking weapon: a Desert Eagle. Technically speaking, vampires – at least those in New York City – weren’t supposed to be armed. It was a clause in some back-alley agreement we have with the NYPD. Sally, however, wasn’t one to let silly things like rules get in her way.
Brandishing the handgun, which looked comically large in her petite hands, she said, “I don’t give warning shots, just in case anyone gets any funny ideas about stealing my virtue.”
“Stealing? I was pretty sure I could buy it with a fiver.” Before she could comment, or shoot me in the leg for my troubles, I added, “Jeez, am I the only one here who isn’t packing?”
“I’m with you, Bill,” Tom replied. “I’m more of a lover than a fighter anyway. Speaking of which...” He started waving toward the left. I looked in that direction and saw a small group of white-robed figures. One of them looked toward us, raised her hand in return, and then came running in our direction – Christy.
“When did you get in, babe?” Tom asked once she had reached us.
“A few days ago. We’ve been communing since then,” she said, whatever the fuck that meant.
“Nice outfit,” he said in a suggestive tone.
“We really should be sky-clad, but it’s kind of cold.”
“Ooh, sky-clad. I could get into that. Maybe we should do some communing of our own.”
“Getting ready to puke here,” Sally snapped.
Christy and Tom, being the overly cute couple that they were – she was cute and the addition of Tom made them a couple – ignored her.
“Sorry, hon. Remember the rules. No fraternizing.”
“That sucks,” he replied in a sulki
ng tone.
“Although,” she added, “If we just happen to bump into each other out in the woods...”
“Really getting ready to puke now!” Sally snarled. To add further emphasis to her annoyance, she cocked the hammer on her weapon with an audible click.
Not wanting to get in the middle of a gun and magic battle, I went over to Tom and grabbed him by the shoulder. “He’ll meet you later, Christy. We gotta go get settled now.”
If she was irked by this, she didn’t show it. Instead, she blew her boyfriend a kiss, then turned to rejoin her own group.
I let out a sigh. Things were going to be difficult enough without having to worry about Tom sneaking off for a magical booty call.
♦ ♦ ♦
The hut smelled every bit as bad as it looked, which is to say it smelled about as good as the creatures playing host to this clusterfuck. Comfort-wise, well I had passed out on my fair share of floors during my college years, so I could deal. Sally was another matter entirely. She convinced Nergui to find her something with which to partition off a little area for herself. After he had done so, she gave us one last warning to stay out of her side. Well, okay, she actually gave Tom and me a warning. Ed was conspicuously absent from her venom. Before he got any bright ideas, though, I gave him a quick, “That means you, too.”
Our bags were unceremoniously deposited outside our dwelling a short while later. Thus armed with at least clean underwear, we all decided to turn in. The next day was most likely going to be a long one.
“Goodnight, boys,” Sally said from behind the divider.
“Are you naked over there?” I called back, eliciting chuckles from my roommates. Her response was another dry click of a hammer being cocked. “Err, I meant, goodnight, Sally.”
With that, we all settled in for some much needed rest. Uncomfortable though it might have been, I didn’t have much problem sacking out. I had long gotten used to the idea of getting some shuteye in the face of impending doom. Thus I slept fairly well ... at least, until I was awoken by something covering my mouth.
♦ ♦ ♦
I jolted awake and instinctively raised my hands to pry off whoever was attacking me, but they had me in a grip that felt like iron.
“Be quiet,” a voice whispered.
I blinked and saw a hooded figure standing over me. I couldn’t tell who it was. The darkness wasn’t the issue, though. Unfortunately, I wasn’t wearing my glasses, so the person’s face was little more than a blurry blob. Damn the peculiarities of vampire healing. I could grow back lost limbs, but God forbid I got twenty-twenty vision out of the deal.
I stopped struggling and nodded. The figure released me and I quickly reached over and put on my glasses. “Alex?”
“Obviously. Now please keep your voice down.”
I sat up and immediately felt a little woozy. I sniffed the air. “What...”
“A special incense to keep your friends asleep. Do not worry, it wears off quickly.”
“Why?”
“The less who know I am here, the better. Regardless, we must still keep our voices down. I do not think I need remind you that we are surrounded by creatures with exceptionally acute senses.”
The whole secrecy thing was feeling a little fishy to me. I eyed him warily as I said, “I spoke with both James and François. Neither of them had any idea who you are.”
“That is because neither of them has been told about my identity.”
“Because?”
“Because the First do not answer to them. I am their agent and theirs alone. If they wish others to know about me, then they do. If not, then others remain ignorant of the fact.”
“But I thought you were their special envoy for these talks,” I replied somewhat accusingly.
“I was.”
“Was?”
“Yes. I was to officially arrive with the rest of my party.”
“The rest ... you mean the group that disappeared?”
“The same. Some of the finest negotiators this planet has ever seen, each one hand selected by the First.”
“Didn’t they have bodyguards?”
“Of course. Do not be foolish. Yet, escorted or not, the fact remains that they have met with an unforeseen fate.”
“What do you think happened?”
“I am not sure we shall ever know. However, the details are not important. What matters is that they are in all likelihood dead.”
“And François has conveniently replaced them with his own people,” I added.
“You are not nearly old enough to be accusing a vampire of François’s status of anything. You should know that before you open your mouth in front of other company. I will allow, though, that it is suspiciously convenient.”
“Okay, but you’re still alive. Why don’t you introduce yourself and confront him?”
“I am afraid things are not that simple. We cannot afford to let any schisms show within our ranks. The Grendel would pounce upon that. Besides, I do not know what François is planning. If he is indeed behind the missing ambassadors, then I have little doubt he will attempt to have me meet the same fate.”
“That sounds a lot like an accusation right there. I thought you said we weren’t allowed to do that.”
“No,” he replied with a grin. “I said that you were not.”
“Fine, so what then? Am I supposed to just go into this meeting and smile like an idiot while his team sells us out?”
“I very much doubt they will be selling us out. Then again, I also do not doubt that whatever is bargained will be in François’s favor.”
“Not to mention, if his own people successfully hash out a peace plan, then that pretty much guarantees him a lock on joining the Drac ... First Coven.”
Alex’s weird eyes opened wide in surprise. “You know about that?”
“I hear things,” I coyly replied.
“So it would seem. You are correct in your assumption. At the moment, François is holding a very strong hand.”
“So what do we do?”
“We stack the deck, of course. We put a joker in amongst the aces.”
“Why do I have a feeling that I’m the joker here?”
“My apologies, Freewill, but it is a necessary evil.”
“I seem to get that a lot,” I said with a sigh. Oh well, it’s not as if I expected this to be easy. “What do you need me to do?”
“You are officially no longer a figurehead.”
“Huh?”
“You heard me. Your mission was to go along with whatever our people negotiated, but that was before any peculiarities transpired. As an agent of the First, I wield their authority. Thus, within these proceedings, by way of your status as Freewill, I say you are now officially in charge.”
“Oh, no...”
“Oh, yes. As representative of the vampire nation, and chosen of the First Coven, your word is law.”
“But...”
“Thus, if you choose to go against the recommendations of François’s advisory staff, they will be powerless to contradict you.”
The Mourning Woods (The Tome of Bill Book 3) Page 14