"So tell me about yourself. You know all about what I do with my life, what's it like to be a rock star?" she asked him.
"Better than I could've imagined, most days. But then there're times when I hate it; the paparazzi, the crazed fans, the complete lack of privacy. And yes, I know that I made a conscious effort to put my life out there like that, but I don't think anyone ever truly knows exactly what they are getting themselves into," he explained. "But I love making music, and I love performing. It's such a rush to be up there on stage, in front of thousands of people, with all of them hanging on your every word."
"Did you ever have stage fright?" she asked.
He paused for a moment. "Yeah. Actually I am nervous every time I walk on stage. But that all disappears the moment the first note plays."
Slowly the food started to disappear until Cameron was full. The conversation kept flowing as he talked about his new album and his struggles with the record company. He found her easy to talk to, and was relating things that he shouldn't be telling a stranger. He had a feeling she wasn't the type to run to the tabloids and spill everything he told her.
Before long, Austin and a few other employees filtered in the door. Madison jumped up, feeling as though she had been caught doing something wrong, even though she could do whatever she wanted. She gathered some of the plates and headed to the kitchen to start cleaning up.
Austin gave Cameron a dirty look as he passed him and went to find Madison.
"I don't want to hear it," Madison called over her shoulder when she heard the kitchen door swing open. "We had a good morning, and I don't want to ruin it, so please save whatever you have to say."
"Fine, I won't say a word," he told her, and started to help her with cleaning the dishes.
The kitchen door opened again, only this time it was Cameron, carrying the rest of the dishes from their table. Madison turned to see him trying to balance all the empty plates. She rushed over to take some from him.
"Thanks, but you didn't have to do that. I could've gotten them," she said.
"Hey, I have to earn my breakfast, right?" he joked, completely aware of the negative feelings that Madison's friend had for him. He pulled Madison to the side, where he could say good bye to her without her 'bodyguard' watching.
"Thanks for everything this morning. I really enjoyed my breakfast, and I'm glad we were able to start over." He looked into her eyes. "You'll let me know when you get the test results back?"
"I'll let you know as soon as I find out. But I don't need them to give you the answer," she said, averting her gaze.
Cameron nodded. "I know, and like I said, I'd like to trust my gut, but you understand why I can't, right?"
"Yeah, I understand."
"Alright. Well, I have to get to the studio, and it looks like you need to get to work here too. Thanks again, I think that helped," he told her, not sure whether to give her a kiss, a hug, or a handshake. He settled for an awkward kiss on the cheek before turning to leave.
Once he was gone, Madison turned around. "Not a word!"
Over the next week, Cameron was busy at the studio, fussing with some final overdubs. When the last song was finished, they decided it was time to celebrate. "Riley, my man, you're taking me to dinner tonight."
Riley looked at his client. "And why am I taking you?"
"Because you need to appreciate your clients. Without me, you wouldn't be nearly as successful," Cameron pointed out.
If Cameron would have been serious or malicious in his statement, Riley would have told him to go get bent. But Riley knew the man too well, and knew he was just trying to get a rise out of him. "Fine, McDonald's it is."
"Not a chance. We're going to The TigerLily."
"You've been going there a lot lately. I thought you were tossed out, and completely embarrassed?" Riley questioned.
"I did, but we worked it all out. They really do have some of the best food," he admitted. He didn't mention that it would give him another chance to talk to Madison.
"Lead the way!" Riley told him as they left the studio.
Their meal was nearly over, and Cameron still hadn't seen Madison. He was just about to ask the waiter where she was when the paramedics rushed in.
The whole dining room was silent as they watched the emergency crew hustle the gurney into the kitchen. Cameron stood at his table, trying to catch a passing waiter to ask what was happening, but none of them would stop to talk to him. For once, their impeccable service fell to the wayside as they stared alongside the patrons at the commotion that was happening behind the swinging doors.
Cameron tossed his napkin on the table and headed to the kitchen. The bartender and another waiter barred his way as he tried to see what was happening. He had an ominous feeling, and he had to make sure that Madison was okay.
As he tried to reason with them, the paramedics burst through the door.
And, just as he'd feared, there lay Madison on the gurney.
"Madison?" He shouted as she passed, but she didn't respond to him. He saw Austin trailing behind the EMTs, and reached out to snag his arm. "Listen, I know you don't like me, but I need to know what happened to her."
"You're right, I don't like you," the man spat, then thought of what Madison would have wanted and sighed. He calmed himself down with great effort. "We don't know what's wrong. She collapsed a few minutes ago, and has been out since. You can follow the ambulance to the hospital if you want."
Cameron nodded and followed after them, forgetting that Riley was still at the table. Cameron's world had narrowed down to the flashing lights of the ambulance and the gurney they were loading into it as he came out the door. All that mattered was finding out what happened to Madison.
They waited for what felt like hours. The tension in the waiting room was palpable as Cameron and Austin sat on opposite sides of the room. Neither one spoke to the other, and the quiet was deafening. When the doctor finally appeared, neither was prepared for what she had to say.
"Are you friends of Ms. Drew?"
Yes," they both said immediately.
"Does she have family here?"
"No," Austin said. The doctor nodded and looked from one man to the other.
"Ms. Drew is conscious again, but unfortunately, she lost the baby. We really aren't sure what happened. Sometimes women just end up having spontaneous miscarriages during their first trimester."
The news hit Cameron hard in the stomach, like a physical blow that left him breathless. He sank down into the nearest chair. He hadn't been kind to her about the baby, and now she had lost it - and something about the words 'she lost the baby' finally made him realize what he could have had.
"Can we see her?" Austin asked.
"Only immediate family at this time."
"I'm the father of the baby," Cameron told her, hoping that would give him access. He wasn't thinking about anything else. All he knew was that the baby that he wasn't ready for had died, and it was the worst feeling in the world.
The doctor nodded. She looked at her chart. "Mr. Rome?"
"Yes," he managed to say, and then looked up at the doctor. She recognized him now - he could see it in the way she looked at him. "I'd appreciate it if you could keep this quiet. I don't want the press to know about any of it. I don't need paparazzi in here, and I'm sure Madison needs it even less."
"Of course." The doctor nodded. "If you'll come right this way, you can see Ms. Drew."
Cameron followed behind the doctor, not sure what he would be walking into when he saw Madison. He walked through the door to her room to find her laying on her side, with her back to him. There was an IV standing beside the bed with a few bags of fluid on it. There was a monitor beside her that seemed to be measuring her heart rate. He watched the blips on the screen, steady and sure.
He slowly walked around to the other side of the bed where she could see him. Her face was tear-stained and her eyes were closed. She looked so tired and so pale, just a shell of the fiery woman he first met.<
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He placed his hand on hers, and she opened her eyes.
"Hi," he whispered.
"Hi," she said, rolling over on her back and running her hands over her face. "I must be a sight, huh?" she said with a humorless laugh.
"You've been through hell." He knew that had to be the truth. Hearing the news in the waiting room was hellish for him, so what she had gone through had to be much, much worse.
She reached over to the stand beside the bed, picked up a folder and handed it to him. "Here are your results."
Cameron instantly wanted to cry. He hadn't wanted to cry in years, but seeing her acting so stoic and calm almost did him in. He held the folder in his hand for a moment, but didn't open it. Instead, he tossed the folder into the garbage can next to her bed.
"I don't need them. I already know I'm the father." His throat tightened. "That I was the father."
Madison began crying. "I'm so sorry, Cameron. I'm sorry that I lost our baby."
Cameron sat on the edge of the bed and hugged her body to his. She shook against him with the force of her grief. "Shh, it's not your fault. The doctor said it just happens sometimes."
Cameron gave up trying to be strong. His tears fell onto her hair. He hadn't been ready for the baby...but now he realized that he wanted it, all the same.
Chapter Six
Madison was released from the hospital the next day under strict orders from her doctor to take it easy. Austin walked by her side as a nurse pushed her wheelchair to the front doors, where a taxi was waiting for them. Madison had a moment of wondering what it would have been like to be pushed to those doors with a baby in her arms. Neither one said a word, both feeling the solemnity of the moment.
Once back at her apartment, Madison went straight for her bedroom and let the tears fall as soon as she lay down. The guilt was immeasurable. If only she hadn't regretted the pregnancy, maybe she wouldn't have lost the baby. Or, if she had slowed down a little, her body would have been able to accommodate the pregnancy. Maybe she worked too hard. Maybe she didn't get enough sleep. Maybe it happened because she had been so drunk the night the baby was conceived. Maybe she just wasn't meant to be a mother.
All sorts of thoughts flew through her mind, but in the end, none of them mattered. She had still lost her baby.
She heard a soft knock on her door, and wiped her eyes before calling him in. She knew Austin was only trying to help, but there was nothing he could do. There was nothing anyone could do.
"Did you want me to make you anything to eat?" he asked, as he slowly approached the bed. Madison shook her head, so he tried something else. "Draw you a bath?" Again, a negative response.
Austin stood uncertainly by the bed. "You just want me to leave you alone?" It nearly broke his heart to see the look of defeat in her eyes as she nodded.
"Ok, I'll leave you alone, but I'm going to hang around for a little while in case you change your mind and need something." He caressed her cheek and kissed her forehead. "Besides, my cable's out and I need to catch up on a few shows."
She didn't even crack a smile; the blank look remained unchanged. Austin backed out of the room and quietly shut the door behind him. She was so broken, and he didn't know what to do to put her back together again.
By five that evening, Madison still hadn't emerged from her room, and Austin needed to get to the restaurant. As much as he hated to leave her alone, he knew she would be pissed if there was no one there to run her establishment.
Just as he was getting up to tell her he was leaving, he heard a knock on the door. He was surprised to see Cameron on the other side. "Sorry, she's not up to company right now," Austin told him with an edge to his voice, before he let Cameron say anything.
"I'm not exactly company," Cameron protested.
Austin snorted with disdain.
"Can you please just tell her I'm here?" Cameron asked, trying to keep the irritation out of his voice.
Austin sighed and moved aside to let Cameron in. "Wait right here, and I'll see if she wants to see you."
He walked down the hall and knocked lightly on her door. He could hear her sobbing in there, and it made him want to go out and kill Cameron for getting her pregnant in the first place.
He slowly peeked in when he heard her trying to calm herself. "Hey, I just wanted to let you know that I'm heading to the restaurant. Do you want me to stop by after we close?"
"No, I'm alright. I don't need a babysitter." She was starting to get irritated with him, even though she knew he was only trying to help. Then she realized what she had said...babysitter. Her eyes welled up with tears again.
"Okay, I understand. I'll tell Cameron to go too," he said, and turned to leave her bedroom, hoping he could get out quickly before she even noticed what he had said. "I'll talk to you soon, Madison."
"Wait!" she called, and sat up. Austin stopped and cringed before he turned around. "Cameron's here?"
"Yeah, he just got here. I'll show him out, so you can be alone."
"No, tell him to come in." Madison sat upright in bed, straightened her messy hair, and wiped the tears from her cheeks. She knew she still looked horrible, but it would have to do. "Call me later, and let me know how everything is at the restaurant."
Austin nodded and left her room. He glared at Cameron as he walked down the hallway. "Don't do anything to upset her, Music Man." He tried to stare Cameron down for a moment more before he grabbed his coat and walked out the apartment door, slamming it behind him.
Cameron shook his head, then picked up the bags that he had brought with him. He cautiously walked down the hall and entered Madison's bedroom.
"Hey," Madison said. Seeing the hesitant look on his face, she put her hand up, effectively stopping him from saying what she knew he was thinking. "Don't ask how I'm doing, that's pretty obvious. And don't look so scared, it's not like it's the first time you've been in here."
Cameron smiled, thankful for her breaking the ice. "I brought some dinner and a few movies. I know it's not the cuisine that The TigerLily makes, but greasy cheeseburgers, fries, and action movies always make me feel better."
"I thought guys were supposed to bring chick flicks to make the damsel in distress feel better." Madison smiled for the first time that day.
"Well, that's what I've heard, too. I tried to meet somewhere in the middle." He offered the bag of movies to her.
"Let me see how you did," she said, looking inside to see Mission Impossible 2 and Thelma & Louise . She had to admit they were two of her favorites.
"I thought maybe we could have a theme; Mission Impossible 2 for second chances, and Thelma & Louise for friendship, rather than romance," he said, purposely busying himself by taking out the containers of food so that he didn't have to look at her while explaining.
Madison laid a hand on his arm, stopping him. He looked at her. Their eyes met, and she gave him a genuine smile. "I think it's a great idea, Cameron. Thank you."
The tension between them instantly melted. Cameron finished unpacking the food. Madison thought she wouldn't be able to eat anything, but one whiff of the French fries and she was starving. He put in the first movie, and Madison moved over to make room for him on the bed.
And so it was that Madison and Cameron - once bitter enemies -- had a pleasant time watching movies, eating, and getting to know each other.
"You know, for a wild rock star, you're a pretty decent guy," she told him, as they lay side by side on her bed talking after the movies were over.
"Yeah, my mom and my nanny raised me right," he said with a laugh. "Actually, I'll let you in on a little secret."
"Yeah?"
"I'm not all that wild," he whispered.
"Yeah, right. I Googled you, I know your deal."
"No, really. I may be a pain in the ass sometimes and want to get my way, but for the most part, I'm a pretty normal guy. I get a little crazy out on tour, but mostly because it's what fans expect of me, rather than how I really am. Yes, I like to drink and have a
good time, but the tabloids make it out to be far worse than it really is."
Madison gave it some thought. "You know...I can almost buy that."
He laughed. "I so rarely get to be myself that sometimes I forget who that is. My mother expects me to be a 'proper young man'; speak properly, walk properly, behave properly. Then my fans expect me to raise hell all the time, but really, I'm just a guy somewhere in between."
Madison nodded. "I can see that," she said. "Think the tabloids would imagine you would show up at a woman's bedside with cheeseburgers and movies and be so nice to her?"
"It's easy to be nice to you," he said.
"Thank you for coming tonight and taking my mind off everything. It means more to me than you could imagine."
Cameron met her eyes. "It meant a lot to me too. I know that I wasn't exactly on board the whole time that you were pregnant, but in my own way, I was beginning to like the idea of being a father."
Madison's eyes began to water at Cameron's admission. He took her chin in his hands. "You're going to get through this. We're going to get through this, together. I am truly sorry for being such a dick before."
She shook her head. "You must hate me. It's my fault," she said, before the waterworks came on full force. "I should have been happier about the baby. I should have slowed down at work. It's my fault that I lost our baby."
Cameron shook his head vehemently and made her look up at him. "No!" he insisted. "It's not your fault in any way. The doctor said that these things happen, and you did nothing wrong. You've got to stop thinking that way. Do you hear me?"
Madison looked up at him.
"I don't blame you," he said with such certainty that there was no choice but to believe him. "I would never, ever blame you."
Seeing that he wasn't lying, and that he didn't blame her, she felt a little weight lifted off her shoulders. "I'm so sorry."
"I know." He pulled her close to him and wrapped his arms around her. He rocked her body with his as the tears kept coming. "I'm sorry too."
The shrill ringing of the phone woke them both from their slumber a few hours later. They both looked at each other and jumped apart as if they'd been pricked. Madison picked up the phone that was next to her bed, and Cameron stood and began collecting the movies that he had brought over.
Taste of Love Page 6