Through a Dark Glass

by Barb Hendee

  I loved Sebastian. No one had ever protected nor treated me with more kindness than him. We had an intimacy I’d never known. We whispered to each other and drank tea or wine in bed. But why didn’t he take action to make us truly husband and wife?

  The nights continued to pass.

  Then one day, the rhythms of the house were interrupted when Jarrod sought me out to tell me he’d arranged for a formal dinner, the first hosted here in many years.

  “Who’s coming?” I asked.

  “Lord Allemond Monvílle, his wife, and his brother. Their lands border our southern line, and I’m trying to buy a section of forest covered in oak. The timber alone is worth the purchase.”

  “Lord Allemond?”

  Jarrod’s eyes sharpened. “You know him?”

  “Yes.”

  “Good. I expect your best efforts here. He’s only coming to look down his nose at me. I want him off guard by what he finds.”

  That night as I readied myself for bed, Sebastian came to the room in a state of excitement.

  “Father actually asked me to help make this evening impressive. He’s ordered me before, but he’s never asked. I want everything to go well.”

  “We’ll make it perfect,” I assured.

  Miriam began working on a new gown for me. With Betty’s help, I started sewing clothes for the men. Matilda began cleaning madly. Sebastian and I planned the menu with meticulous attention to detail. He wanted to start the dinner with baked salmon in a simple white sauce.

  Two days before the dinner, I couldn’t find him and I wanted to ask him about centerpieces. I thought he might be in the barracks playing cards.

  As I stepped out into the courtyard, I nearly ran into Rolf, who was on his way in. Normally, he wasn’t home at this time of day, and the near collision unnerved me. My head barely reached his chest.

  He looked down with his usual angry glower, but to my surprise, he spoke.

  “And how are you enjoying life with your new husband?” he asked. “I assume by now you’ve realized you made the wrong choice.”

  He sounded so sure of himself. Did he know there was something not quite right with the marriage?

  But I understood Rolf better than he might think. Rolf respected only strength, and showing him any sort of weakness was a mistake. Drawing myself up, I channeled my mother’s voice.

  “If my other two options were you or Kai, I’d say I made the only choice.”

  With that, I swept past him, feeling better than I had since my arrival. It felt good to stand up to Rolf and not find myself in need of Sebastian’s protection.

  * * * *

  Mid-morning, the day of the dinner party, I was in the great hall experimenting with centerpieces. The Volodanes grew no flowers, and Sebastian had asked me to see what I could do with wild flowers. He badly wanted to impress his father, to show that he too could contribute skills that would help raise the status of the family, and I was determined to do everything possible to help him.

  I had a bouquet of wild roses in my hand when Jarrod and Sebastian walked in.

  “Is everything ready?” Jarrod asked.

  I turned to face him. “Yes, I think so.”

  “It better be,” he warned. “I want Allemond impressed by what he finds here.”

  I wasn’t sure anything would impress Lord Allemond, but I could at least make sure nothing went wrong. The salmon had just been delivered and were now in cold storage in the cellars.

  My mind was so busy running details through my head that I was caught unawares when Jarrod said, “And you know I’ll expect your help with this land deal. I want your best efforts.”

  For an instant, I couldn’t draw breath. My father had told him. Of course Father told him. I had so much hoped to leave that part of my life behind me.

  Feeling defeated, I asked, “Who do you most wish me to focus upon? Allemond himself or his brother? I hope Father told you I can read only one person in a day.”

  Jarrod stared at me. “What do you mean by ‘read’?” he asked slowly.

  Then I realized my mistake. He didn’t know anything. His mention of my help must have referred to me using my manners and family influence to throw Allemond off guard.

  “Nothing,” I answered. “I thought you wished me to gauge his reactions and offer counsel later.”

  In a flash, his right hand snaked out and grabbed my wrist. I gasped as he jerked me up against his chest. The pain in my arm was startling, but it only lasted a few seconds.

  Before I knew what was happening, Sebastian snarled and bolted forward and shoved his father away from me.

  “Don’t touch her!”

  I stumbled forward as I was released, and both men faced each other. Jarrod appeared more stunned than anything else, but his fist was drawn back ready to strike. He hesitated. Sebastian wasn’t as tall as his father, but he was younger and his tightly muscled body looked like a coiled spring.

  The tension was thick until Sebastian took a step back. “The dinner will be perfect if you give me a free hand,” he said, “and Megan will provide all the help you need with the guests. Just don’t touch her. She’s mine. You do as you like with the rest of us, but not her.”

  Jarrod was so thrown by Sebastian’s behavior that he seemed to have forgotten all about me. Sebastian motioned toward the archway with his head.

  “Go,” he told me.

  I hurried for the passage, wondering what they might say to each other after I was gone. Sebastian couldn’t know it, but he’d just done me a great service. Jarrod didn’t know about my ability, and I would never make such a mistake again. If he knew what I could do, he’d use me at every chance he had, ordering me to read his enemies or people he doubted. I longed to leave that part of my life behind and never invade anyone’s mind again.

  Due to Sebastian’s protection, I’d kept my secret.

  The near-conflict left me weary, and I decided to go up to my room and take just a few moments for myself.

  I’d made it only halfway to the entrance to the tower when Betty came trotting behind me. “My lady.”

  I stopped. “Yes?”

  “Lavonia is asking for you in the kitchen. She says the fish has gone bad.”

  “Gone bad?”

  “That’s what she says, my lady.”

  “I’m coming.”

  I’d not dealt with Lavonia since that first meeting, so I didn’t know her well. She had volunteered to do the fish course and was probably being overly cautious. Doing an about-face, I headed west toward the kitchen. Upon arriving, I found it a busy place.

  Ester was rolling crusts for strawberry tarts, and two girls Sebastian had hired for temporary help were scrubbing pots in a large washbasin. Cora sat peeling potatoes.

  Lavonia appeared to be supervising.

  “Betty says there’s a problem with the fish?” I asked, stepping through the archway.

  Lavonia turned. “They’re spoilt. We can’t use them.”

  When she spoke, she gave the impression that I was last person in the world she wished to see.

  Ester stopped rolling, and everyone was listening to us.

  “Those fish were caught this morning,” I answered. “I checked them myself. Where have they been stored?”

  “They’re down in the cellar, in the coolest room,” Lavonia said. “You want to come down with me to check them?”

  This seemed wise to me, and now I was concerned. If the salmon had somehow gone bad, we had little time to replace them, and Sebastian had been so particular about that dish as the first course.

  I followed Lavonia down to the cellar where four large salmon had been placed in cold storage. Leaning over, I touched several of them. They were firm and fresh.

  “Oh, Lavonia, these are fine.”

  “You’re sure. I thought I smelled somet
hing bad.”

  I sniffed several of the fish and smelled nothing wrong. “No, you can prepare them later today.”

  She nodded tersely, and we headed back up.

  After I left the kitchen and was on my way down the passage, I saw Sebastian coming toward me.

  “Is your wrist all right?” he asked and then frowned. “Why are you here? Is anything wrong?”

  “Lavonia said she was worried about the salmon, but I just checked them and they’re fine.”

  His gaze moved down the passage toward the kitchen. “Lavonia told you that?”

  “Yes, she’s preparing the dish. Why?”

  He smiled at me. “No reason. Why don’t you go rest for a bit? You’ve not stopped all morning.”

  He passed by me, continuing on.

  * * * *

  That evening, I headed for the dining hall at precisely the right moment. My mother had always preferred to make an entrance at dinner parties, and I’d decided to follow her example.

  Tonight, my hair hung loose with several strands in the front over my forehead and pinned up with a small jeweled clip. I wore kohl at the corners of my eyes and beet juice on my lips. My gown was burgundy silk with a v-neckline.

  I stopped at the entrance of the hall to see what waited me.

  All four Volodanes were there, wearing the new clothing Betty and I had made for them. Sebastian wore a high-collared jacket over a white shirt, and he cut a dashing figure.

  He was the first one to spot me standing there, and he smiled with warmth in his eyes.

  The hall was clean and properly arranged. There were white cloths on the table along with porcelain plates, silver cutlery, and pewter goblets. I’d done the centerpieces with wild growing roses and lilacs.

  My gaze drifted to the guests: Lord Allemond, his wife Rosamund, and his brother, Phillipe. Several of the Volodane guards stood discreetly near the walls, along with several of the Monvílles’.

  Taking a deep breath, I stepped forward and entered the hall.

  Lord Allemond spotted me next, and I couldn’t help a stab of satisfaction at the flicker of uncertainty that passed over his face. “Megan?”

  The sight of me must have equally surprised Lady Rosamund, but she showed nothing besides false pleasure, kissing my cheeks and making politely cutting remarks that I pretended not to understand. I did notice her stealing occasional appreciative glances at Sebastian, but who could blame her? Most women would find him striking.

  “Shall we all sit and enjoy some wine before dinner?” I asked.

  As we took our seats, Lord Allemond examined the porcelain dishes and pewter goblets.

  “From Chaumont Manor, I assume?” he posed.

  “Part of my dowry,” I answered diplomatically, “and I think they grace my new father’s table well.”

  I could see the silent glee in Sebastian’s eyes, and it gave me joy. After all our hard work, everything was perfect. Allemond shifted in his chair. It was clear that none of this was playing out as he’d expected.

  Betty and Matilda poured wine from the best cask my parents had sent. Phillipe and Lady Rosamund both took a sip, frowning at its fine quality.

  Not long after, the fish course arrived. Again, Betty and Matilda quietly served.

  “How are your parents, my dear?” Lady Rosamund asked me, but even as she spoke, she stole another glance at Sebastian.

  “Very well, I think,” I answered. “I haven’t had much time to write them.”

  In truth, I’d written two letters to my mother, and she hadn’t answered.

  “No, I can see you’ve been busy,” Rosamund answered, another cutting barb for the Volodanes on how I had transformed the hall.

  Once everyone had been served a portion of the salmon, she, Phillipe, and Jarrod raised their forks at the same time. I lifted mine, anxious that this first course should meet their standards. The fish was covered in white sauce, and as I took a small forkful, I heard the sounds of gagging.

  My eyes flew up.

  Lady Rosamund was gagging, and Phillipe was spitting.

  Jarrod spat out a mouthful of salmon and jumped to his feet. “What in the name of the gods . . .?”

  “What?” Sebastian asked in alarm. “What is it?”

  Quickly scraping off the white sauce, I took a sniff at my salmon and nearly choked from the smell. “No one eat the fish!” I cried. “Put down your forks.”

  Rolf, Kai, and Allemond all dropped their forks. Kai and Rolf appeared distressed, but Allemond’s eyes glowed with delight. This was exactly what he’d been hoping for. Rosamund and Phillipe both continued to gag or choke. Rosamund was turning greenish, and I feared she’d swallowed an entire bite.

  “Betty!” I called. “Help me.”

  I hurried to Rosamund, grasping her shoulders. “Try to retch, my lady,” I said. “You must bring it back up.”

  Though this hardly was what anyone would wish at a formal dinner table, I feared for her safety if she could not purge herself. She could fall ill from food poisoning.

  A moment later, the fish came back up.

  My eyes rose to Sebastian.

  His face was desperate, almost manic, and my heart nearly broke at the sight. He’d wanted nothing to be less than perfect, and this was a disaster. I couldn’t understand it.

  Rosamund still looked very ill, and Phillipe was now slightly green. They would both need to lie down.

  “Betty, Matilda, please help our guests to their rooms.” I leaned down to Rosamund. “I’ll be in to see you shortly, just as soon as I’ve seen to some things in here.”

  She barely nodded and allowed herself to be led away by Betty. Matilda helped Phillipe.

  Lord Allemond hadn’t touched his fish, so he remained in the hall.

  “My lord,” I said to him. “I am so sorry. If you’ll allow me to have this cleared away, I can have the beef course brought in.”

  Though his expression was dour, I knew he was pleased beyond description. He raised one hand. “Thank you, my dear, but I think I have had enough . . . dinner.”

  Sebastian blanched, and I ached for him.

  “What in all the hells happened?” Jarrod demanded.

  Sebastian whirled and strode for the archway. “Wait here and I’ll find out.”

  Everyone else was on his feet by now.

  I walked to Allemond. “Are you sure I can’t have something else brought in?”

  “No, I should check on my lady soon,” he answered, picking up his goblet of wine and looking to Jarrod. “But I would like to discuss a few aspects of this land deal. Can we speak now?”

  Though Jarrod was still shaken over the catastrophe that was supposed to be his family’s first formal dinner in society, he managed to nod and grab his own goblet. He, Allemond, and Rolf moved over the hearth to speak in low voices. I wasn’t listening closely, but I did hear the phrase, “Bark beetles.”

  Kai moved up beside me, gazing down at the table. “What do you think happened?” he whispered.

  “I don’t know. We were so careful.”

  The trio of men by the hearth continued speaking until I heard Jarrod say, “All right then. The day after tomorrow.”

  Allemond said his good nights and left the hall.

  Jarrod turned to glare at me, and I feared what he was about to say, but he never had time. Sebastian came striding back in, and the sight him startled everyone. There was blood all over the back of his right hand.

  Beads of sweat ran down his angry face. “It was deliberate!”

  I’d never seen him like this and ran to him. “You’re bleeding.”

  “It’s not mine,” he answered, but he was looking at Jarrod and not me. “One of the kitchen maids, Lavonia, did it on purpose. She hid spoiled fish behind the hen house and used those instead of the fresh ones.”

&nbs
p; Jarrod closed the distance between them. “Why? Was she bribed?”

  “Worse than that. She did it to discredit Megan. To make it look like Megan ordered spoiled fish to be served.”

  Jarrod’s eyes narrowed. “And how do you know the fish Megan ordered were still fresh?”

  “Because I checked them myself before lunch.”

  “Lavonia has admitted to this?” I asked, feeling numb.

  He nodded. “And Cora knew as well. I asked a few questions and made a few threats, and the story came out. I’ve locked Lavonia down in a cellar room. I’ll handle this myself.” He ran his hands through his hair and some of the blood smeared across the side of his head. “Father, I’m so sorry.”

  Jarrod turned away. “Sorry doesn’t change anything.”

  Sebastian closed his eyes with his hands still up on his head. Kai appeared distressed, but now Rolf looked smug.

  * * * *

  Later, alone with Sebastian in my room, I hoped to comfort him, but he was beyond comfort, pacing back and forth at the end of the bed.

  “That bitch,” he said. “I thought she might be up to something. That’s why I went down to the cellar after talking to you in the passage.”

  “You couldn’t have known.”

  “Oh, yes, I could. I wouldn’t put anything past her. She sleeps in Father’s bed now and then, and she probably thought he’d protect her if anything went wrong. That’s a joke. But what astonishes me is she genuinely seemed to believe you’d be blamed for all this. She never thought anyone would even glance her way, which makes her stupid as well as cruel.”

  “Sebastian . . . whose blood is that?”

  “Hers. Who did you think?”

  “You struck Lavonia?”

  “I’ll do more than that before this is finished. Or I may just leave her in that cellar room.”

  I went cold. Yes, the girl had done wrong, but he sounded dangerous.

  “You can’t leave in there all night,” I said. “Does she have any water? Surely, you should just dismiss her and send her off. Losing her position here is punishment enough.”

  He didn’t answer and kept pacing. He was like a stranger to me.