Through a Dark Glass

by Barb Hendee

  Without an instant’s hesitation, I leaped from my seat and jumped down into the area with my skirts flying. People behind me gasped.

  Neither of the men fighting saw me. They were too focused on each other.

  As Kai continued moving past the man and was turning back, the mercenary abandoned all rules of the match and swung for Kai’s face, slicing his cheek open. Unprepared for this, Kai stumbled, and the man swung downward, cutting through the back of his right knee.

  “No!” Sebastian cried, jumping to his feet.

  Kai fell backwards onto the floor of the pit. The man gripped the hilt of his sword with both hands just as I reached them. Throwing my body over Kai’s, I held up one hand in instinctive defense and looked up to the mercenary.

  At the sight of me, he froze.

  Then his expression hardened and he raised the blade higher, ready to bring it down through us both. But it was too late. Guards had poured from the lower door, and one of the Cornetts’ men reached us first. He rammed a knife into the side of the man’s throat.

  For a just a second, I thought I saw a flash of guilt pass across this guard’s features, but then Sebastian reached me and dropped to his knees, and all of my attention turned to Kai.

  His face was bleeding, and so was his leg. He writhed in pain.

  “Help!” Sebastian shouted at Lord Henri. “We need help.”

  * * * *

  The Cornetts were patrons to a physician who lived nearby, and Henri sent for him before we’d even moved Kai out of the arena. Watching my husband, as he was carried to our guest room, was one of the most difficult things I’d ever lived through. I believed Kai to have a high pain threshold, and he was in agony.

  Upon, arriving, the physician took one look at him and pulled out a bottle of poppy syrup. He made Kai drink enough of it to put him to sleep. Then Kai’s wounds had been dressed. The slash on his face would probably leave a scar, but no one was concerned with that.

  Our fears were for his leg, and the physician could tell us little. He struck me as competent but not gentle or comforting.

  “The main thing you need to guard against is infection,” he said. “If it becomes infected, it will have to come off.”

  Jarrod looked as if he were about to be ill. “And if it doesn’t?”

  “Only time will tell how much use it will be,” the physician said bluntly. “There are no bones broken, but the cut is deep and across the back of his knee. It might heal enough for him to put weight on it, but even if, he’ll most likely always have a limp, and his days of sparring with swords are over.”

  Jarrod closed his eyes.

  Not long after that, Lord Henri cleared the room to give us some peace. As he himself left, he said, “I will get to the bottom of this. You can be assured.”

  Then Jarrod, Sebastian, and I stood around Kai where he lay.

  “What made you jump down into the ring?” Sebastian asked me. He must have been waiting to ask me this.

  I couldn’t tell him the truth. If Jarrod learned my secret, he’d be determined to exploit it.

  “Something was wrong,” I answered. “I could see it in that man’s face. He was sweating, and I nearly needed a shawl.”

  “And that was enough to send you running in front of all those people? If you’d been wrong, you would have embarrassed Kai almost beyond forgiveness. You know how proud he is.”

  I looked away.

  Sebastian sighed. “I’m sorry. You saved his life.”

  “But she didn’t save his leg,” Jarrod said bitterly.

  For him, that was all that mattered right now. Kai was his last hope, and now Kai had been maimed.

  “We still don’t know what happened,” Sebastian said, “Why would some mercenary try to kill Kai? I assume he was hired? But that blasted guard had to go and kill the only person who might have been able to give us answers.”

  By now, I’d had some time to think, to try and piece things together. I knew Allemond had hired the man—or perhaps coerced was a better term. It seemed the Monvílles had arranged for our invitation and then originally planned to attend the gathering. Perhaps Allemond had second-guessed this in the end and decided that after Rolf’s recent death, another attack on the Volodanes might put him in the path of blame? If he weren’t here, no one would think to blame him.

  I thought on the fleeting guilt in the expression of the Cornett guard who’d killed Kai’s attacker. Had Allemond arranged to pay him a sum he couldn’t refuse? For Sebastian was right. If the mercenary had lived, he would have been tortured until he talked. Now, he was silenced forever.

  “Who’d hire someone to kill Kai?” Jarrod asked. “Cornett?”

  “No.” Sebastian shook his head. “His outrage is genuine. I can tell the difference. That’s what bothers me. I looked all around at faces and everyone was stunned.”

  At this, I saw a possible opportunity to at least give a warning. “Lady Rosamund asked for our invitation to this gathering, and the only noble who’s ever made a move to harm us is Allemond Monvílle.”

  Jarrod’s eyes met mine. “I’ve been thinking the same thing. We’ve no proof, but this could have been arranged.”

  I knew it had been.

  We were all quiet for a while, and then Sebastian asked, “Father, once we get home, do you want me to handle it my way?”

  Jarrod nodded.

  “You’ll have to give me a free hand.”

  Jarrod nodded again.

  I had no idea what this meant.

  * * * *

  Near midnight, Sebastian ordered me to go to his guest room and sleep for a few hours. He promised to sit with Kai and come fetch me if my husband woke up.

  Exhausted, I fell asleep, and light outside the window was just appearing when I opened my eyes. I’d remained dressed, so I rushed from the bed and hurried the few doors down the passage to the room I’d been sharing with Kai.

  When I entered, Sebastian was sitting by the bed, leaning in, and talking to Kai, who was awake. Sebastian’s face was troubled, and his voice was intense.

  “Don’t say that! It’s not true.”

  Kai’s face was hard and angry as he stared up at the ceiling.

  As I entered, Sebastian stood. “Here’s Megan. Maybe she can talk some sense into you.”

  Without another word, he swept of the room. Feeling cautious, uncertain what I’d walked into, I went to the chair and sat down, grasping Kai’s hand. He didn’t grasp back, nor did he take his eyes off the ceiling.

  “Sebastian says the physician doesn’t even know if I’ll ever be able to put weight on my leg,” he said.

  “No, he said that time will tell.”

  “Same thing. I may not walk again.”

  He sounded as angry as the day I’d met him, almost like a stranger to me now, who’d come to know the other side of him.

  “And you may,” I said.

  “He also told me you jumped down into the area, ran in, and threw yourself over me?”

  He didn’t remember? Maybe he’d been in too much shock and pain.

  “Yes.”

  “You should have saved yourself the trouble. Then I’d be dead, and you’d be free. Now you’re saddled with a cripple.”

  “Kai!” I couldn’t help the exclamation. “How can you say that?”

  “Because it’s true.”

  My heart was breaking at his pain, and there was nothing I could say to help him.

  “Get out, Megan,” he ordered. “Send in a maid to nurse me if you must, but I can’t have you in here.”

  “Kai . . .?”

  “Out.”

  * * * *

  We remained at the Cornetts for three days, and then Jarrod decided it was safe to take Kai home in the wagon. He had to be carried down on a door, and I knew how much the shame of this hurt him. H
e hadn’t said another word to me.

  Upon arriving home, we settled him in his room on the third floor of the tower.

  “Betty can look after me,” he said, lying in his bed and once more looking up at the ceiling.

  “No, she will not,” I answered. “I will.”

  “I don’t want you in here.”

  “Well, that’s unfortunate because you have no say in the matter.”

  Being home again gave me strength. There was nothing he could say or do there that would send me away. I fed him, nursed him, and changed his dressing, and made certain there was no sign of infection in his wound.

  It closed up and began to heal.

  Unlike when I was nursing Jarrod, Sebastian was eager to help with Kai, and this made things easier. After a week, he got Kai up on his feet and had him limp around the room, putting some weight on the leg.

  At first, Kai was resentful of this to the point that I wanted to slap him, but the second time they tried it, he actually put some weight down. I could tell it hurt, but the leg held.

  After this, he was encouraged and worked harder.

  The next day, Sebastian came to me and said, “I’m leaving, and I may not be back until tomorrow.”

  Nonplussed, I asked, “Where are you going?” I didn’t want him to leave. Not now.

  He smiled. “Tell you when I get back.” Leaning down, he kissed the side of my face. “Kai needs you. Just stay in the room with him.”

  Sebastian never expressed physical affection to me, and this worried me more than anything else.

  That day, I had Kai lean on me as he practiced walking. He was doing better.

  “Good,” I said, trying not to struggle beneath his weight.

  He didn’t answer. He still wasn’t speaking to me much, and at times, I struggled to remain patient with him. It was difficult to believe he was still angry with me for having saved his life, but this was the front he insisted upon showing.

  I walked him around the room until he began growing tired, and then I led him back toward the bed. As he was getting settled, a knock sounded on the door.

  “My lord?” a familiar voice said. “My lady?”

  “Come in,” I called.

  The door opened and Daveed walked inside carrying a set of wooden crutches. “My father was a carpenter, and I’ve been working on these.”

  For the first time since his injury, Kai’s face lit up. “Let me try them.”

  He was already tired, but I wasn’t about to stop him. Daveed got him up and helped him arrange the crutches under his arms. Within moments, Kai was swinging himself around the room with no help.

  “If you like,” I said, “we could have a bedroom made up for you downstairs. That way, you’d have the run of the main floor, even the courtyard.”

  Though nothing really made him happy anymore, this idea appealed to him—enough that he let Daveed half carry him down the stairs. I had a room made up for him near the great hall, and Kai’s world became a little wider.

  That night, when dinnertime arrived, he swung into the hall on his crutches and Jarrod watched him coming.

  “How’s the leg?” Jarrod asked.

  He’d been less helpful these past days, but I knew he was suffering inside. His own wound prevented him from being of much physical assistance, and he was hardly the type to give comfort or encouragement. He’d lost his eldest son, and now his youngest son’s mobility was in question.

  “I don’t know,” Kai answered honestly. “The pain is lessening. And thanks to Daveed, I can get around on my own.” He looked around. “Where’s Sebastian?”

  “Gone out.”

  Jarrod didn’t elaborate, but I had a feeling he knew exactly where Sebastian had gone. I couldn’t help wondering. Sebastian rarely left the grounds of the keep.

  We ate dinner, and Kai played a few games of chess with his father while I worked on some sewing. The evening felt almost normal, so much so that when Kai took up his crutches and announced he was going to bed, I walked with him to the room I’d had made up.

  At the door, I touched his arm. “Should I stay? I’d like to.”

  The tone of my voice made my meaning clear. We’d not slept in the same bed since that first night at the Cornetts.

  He turned away. “No. I’m . . . I’m better off sleeping alone.”

  After going inside, he closed the door. Standing outside, facing it, I wanted to weep. I’d felt alone at times in my life, but never this alone.

  Had I lost him?

  * * * *

  The next day, Sebastian arrived home shortly following lunch. Kai had just gone to his room to rest.

  As Sebastian walked into the great hall, I ordered food brought for him.

  “Where were you?” I asked.

  “Paying a call on Rosamund Monvílle,” he answered. “The Monvílles were quite hospitable considering my unannounced arrival. They specifically asked after Kai. Wasn’t that considerate of them?”

  I nearly gasped and was glad Kai wasn’t here. “The Monvílles?”

  Jarrod looked Sebastian up and down. “Is it done?”

  “Not yet, but soon.”

  “What do you mean?” Jarrod demanded. “What did you do?”

  Sebastian shrugged. “Met a pretty kitchen maid and spent some time with the food stores.”

  Jarrod was quiet for a moment. “I hope you know what you’re doing.”

  I wanted to know what was happening, but something in both their faces kept me from asking.

  Later that afternoon, Kai went out into the courtyard on his crutches. I went out to watch over him, but the guards were glad to see him, and this made me step back. He didn’t seem remotely embarrassed to be seen on his crutches. The only thing he couldn’t stand was to be seen requiring help from anyone.

  I was grateful to Daveed.

  Over the next few days, this gratitude increased as I realized how important it was that Kai spend time outside with the guards. Captain Marcel had some influence over my young husband and had helped to train him in techniques with the sword.

  “Use the crutches,” the captain said, “but put some weight on that leg when you can. You’ll need to strengthen it slowly.”

  He made it sound as if Kai was facing an injury like any other, something that needed only time and effort to heal. I think this did more for Kai’s spirits than anything else. He began to work harder at his own recovery.

  Two weeks following Sebastian’s visit to the Monvílles, Captain Marcel came into the great hall as we were eating dinner. As he would never do this without a good reason, we fell silent.

  “What’s wrong?” Jarrod asked.

  “Forgive me, my lord, but I’ve just heard some news, and I felt it couldn’t wait.”

  We all looked at him with a mix of expectation and trepidation.

  “Allemond Monvílle is dead,” the captain said.

  “Dead?” Kai repeated. “How do you know this?”

  “A friend of mine . . . from my days in the king’s army stopped by Monvílle Hall yesterday seeking work. He was refused, but while there, he learned that Lord Monvílle has been dead nearly two weeks, poisoned.”

  “Poisoned?” Jarrod echoed.

  “Yes. Apparently, there was a cask of fine wine in the kitchen. It was his favorite though Lady Rosamund did not care for it. No one else was allowed to drink from his special stores. Someone laced the cask with hemlock. A kitchen maid was . . . questioned, but as of yet, no culprit has been named.”

  Jarrod glanced at Sebastian, who’d been silent during this exchange.

  “Go on back to the barracks,” Jarrod told Marcel.

  The captain hesitated. “My lord?”

  “What?”

  “My friend . . . the man with the news, is still seeking work. May I hire him?”


  “Yes,” Jarrod said absently. “Give him a place here.”

  “Thank you.”

  As Captain Marcel left, Kai shook his head. “Poisoned. Someone cheated us of ever taking revenge.”

  “Did they?” Sebastian said, taking a bite of roast chicken. “Perhaps they did us all a favor.”

  Looking at him, I suddenly felt cold.

  * * * *

  Midsummer passed into late summer, and Kai reached a point where he could walk without his crutches. His limp was pronounced, and he had to keep much of his weight on his left leg. This created an awkward stride for him as he could only place weight on the right foot for a few seconds while quickly moving the left one forward.

  But he was walking.

  The slash on his face was little more than a red line now, and it would eventually turn into a white scar, but it didn’t bother him. Captain Marcel once said it made him look battle-scarred. Kai almost smiled. I was ever grateful to the captain.

  Though Kai was self-conscious about his limp, I think he could have come to terms with it had his father not watched him so carefully for improvement. At times, Jarrod winced when he saw Kai come into a room with his odd, step-drag-step manner of walking. This hurt Kai’s confidence as much as Captain Marcel helped it.

  Relations between my husband and myself had not improved. He was civil but nothing more.

  One day, as the harvest was about to begin, he had a horse saddled, and he rode out the gate. I watched him go.

  Up on the horse, he was capable of gripping with both knees and no one would even be aware of this injury.

  Poor Jarrod was not so fortunate. As of yet, he still couldn’t ride without causing pain to his abdomen. Up on a horse, he needed the muscles in his stomach, and they’d not healed properly.

  When Kai came home that night, Jarrod and I were in the great hall by ourselves. Hearing the familiar sound of Kai’s footsteps, I turned to see him come through the archway. Something was different. I could see it right away. He looked almost . . . happy. In addition to his need to be seen as utterly independent, he was a person who also needed an occupation. He needed to be useful. I loved that about him.

  He’d spent the day out on the land, overseeing the workers and the impending harvest, and this alone had washed a way a good deal of his internal pain and self-doubt.