Secretly Yours: A Christian Valentine's Day Romance (Riverbend Romance Novella Book 1)

by Valerie Comer

  Might as well start looking for those answers. “I was surprised to find you became a pastor.”

  “I bet.” Nick chuckled. “It definitely hadn’t been my plan.” A few strides later, he continued. “I went to U of C on a hockey scholarship. I was going to get drafted to a big NHL franchise. Somebody with a good shot at the Stanley Cup. I was going to be the driving force that pushed my team to victory. I could already see my name next to The Great One in the Hockey Hall of Fame. Don Cherry would speak of me with respect, and I’d rake in the goals… and the trophies, of course.”

  Of course. That certainly sounded like the Nick she remembered. It hadn’t all been ego speaking. He’d been talented enough to pull it off. She was interested in spite of herself. “What happened?”

  “Got sidelined. I’d never been sick a day in my life, but I got run over by the mononucleosis train midway through my first semester. I missed most of my games and nearly flunked out.”

  Against her better judgment, a niggle of sympathy worked its way to the surface. “Bad luck.”

  “I sure thought so. I was very bitter. All those dreams, crumbling into dust. But things happen for a reason. I’d been ignoring thoughts of God, shoving them aside in my self-worth and busyness. Suddenly I had little time for anything but thinking.”

  Snow crunched under their snowshoes. Lindsey pulled her water bottle out of her pocket and took a long swallow.

  “My roommate’s brother came to visit at his school’s study break. A religious guy, not very athletic. I hadn’t given him a second thought before that because, you know, he couldn’t help Nick Harrison into the NHL.” Nick’s laugh didn’t seem forced. “I was right about that, but he could help Nick Harrison into the kingdom. He asked me questions and answered mine and challenged me to think deeper, then deeper yet. At the end of the week, I opened my life to Jesus and joined my friend at Bible college the next fall.”

  “And the rest, as they say, is history?”

  “Not quite that simple, but yeah, that’s when things headed a new direction in my life. What about you? When did you become a Christian?”

  “Nothing so dramatic. My mom took me to church when I was a kid. I guess you could say I drank the kool-aid early.”

  She could feel Nick’s glance, so she increased her speed a little, forcing him to focus on the snowy path.

  “That’s an odd way to put it,” he said at last. “I see God’s love and His gift of salvation as the biggest prize in my life. It’s what makes everything worth living. Even the Stanley Cup, the Conn Smythe, and the Art Ross rolled into one season finale wouldn’t come remotely close.”

  “You’ve sure changed.”

  He reached over and touched her arm. “I’ve been trying to tell you that for three weeks.”

  He had. So it seemed he’d done a full one-eighty. Why did she still feel stuck in the middle, with no significant growth in her own life? She hadn’t been good enough for Nick Harrison before, and it seemed she still wasn’t.

  ~*~

  Nick studied Lindsey’s face as they approached the highway. “First chance for a ride back to the golf course,” he offered.

  Her chin lifted as she glanced at him. “You tired?”

  “Just checking if you were.”

  “I’m good.”

  The path narrowed as it headed under the bridge. Several fixtures cascaded brightness over the path and into the river beyond. And then semi-darkness loomed again. They were across from Riverside Park now, the full moon glinting off the river.

  Nick wasn’t going to waste this evening, even if getting any words out of Lindsey felt like a bigger workout than snowshoeing. “Tell me what you’ve been doing since you left town. What got you into cooking?”

  “I waitressed for a year after high school, saving up for culinary school back east. After graduation, I got into a start-up with really fresh, local ingredients. Moved up from there to a larger, more established restaurant in Niagara, but I began to miss the West. When Fresh Start opened in Castlebrook, I put in my resume and got the lead chef position.”

  “That’s really impressive. Fresh Start has a great reputation.”

  She shrugged. Yeah, of course she knew that. She’d been largely responsible.

  “It seems you were all set. Why come back to Riverbend?”

  Lindsey stopped in the middle of the path. “Madison. I’d missed so much of her life. She was only a little kid when I left and, honestly, she still seems like one. She’s too young to be without a mother.”

  Nick took a couple of more steps before realizing she’d really stopped. Now he turned to face her. “I’m sorry about your mom,” he said simply.

  Was it his imagination, or did her eyes glisten?

  “Yeah, it’s been rough. Impaired driver, and she was in a coma for months. I came home every chance I could, but she never regained consciousness. Never said my name again.”

  She was definitely crying.

  “Or Madison’s.” Lindsey’s voice broke. “My sister needed it more, and she didn’t get closure, either.”

  Nick angled his snowshoes closer and reached out. He didn’t ask permission, just gathered Lindsey in his arms. She didn’t fight, but sagged against him, sobbing into his jacket collar. He rubbed the back of her puffy vest, then swept the hair away from her damp cheeks.

  He had no words.

  Chapter 8

  How had she gotten herself in Nick Harrison’s arms? Lindsey sniffled and tried to pull away. With a little extra hug, he released her, but when she dared a glance at him, his dark eyes were lined with concern.

  She put on a shaky smile. “I-I’m okay.”

  “You don’t have to carry everything alone, Lindsey.”

  What exactly did he mean by that? There hadn’t exactly been a line of people willing to help. Look at Greg, for instance. She wiped her eyes on the sleeve of her jacket and glanced at the path. Had anyone just witnessed her meltdown? Possibly. The backs of a few snowshoers disappeared at the north end of the visible trail.

  Nick reached for her hand, and she let him take it as they started moving again. He studied her. “What I really meant was that I keep giving my troubles to Jesus, and that helps a lot. I know He cares about me. He doesn’t give me more than I can handle, but He sure does allow things that make me lean on Him and grow as a believer.”

  “You have troubles, Nick?” Oops, had the bitterness shown in her voice?

  He swung her hand. “Is that so hard to believe?”

  Okay, he sounded like he was teasing. She could try to match that. “And here I thought you were born with the golden hockey stick in your hands.”

  Nick laughed outright, and her heart warmed at the full, rich sound, so different from that of a selfish teen bent on making himself look good at the expense of others. It was going to take some getting used to, this new-and-improved Nick. One who seemed to actually enjoy being with her even when she was such lousy company.

  She could change, too. Couldn’t she? Like him, she could set the past where it firmly belonged — in the history books — and see where the future might lead. Not just with Nick, either, but with the Lord, too. She’d let that relationship stagnate, forgetting how meaningful Jesus had been to her as a teen.

  Lindsey squeezed Nick’s mittened hand. “Thanks.”

  He angled his head toward her. “For what?”

  “Reminding me.” She took a deep breath. “I’ve let bitterness eat at me for long enough.”

  Several steps later, he said, “Bitterness at…”

  “You.”

  “Whoa. So I’m not just a symptom of the problem.”

  She shook her head. “I was just a kid with a serious case of crush on an older guy. And when you seemed to finally notice me…”

  Nick ducked his head and scratched his neck. “I was a jerk.”

  “Pretty much.” But the heat was out of her words.

  He turned toward her. “Have I told you yet that I’m really sorry? Because I
am.”

  “You’ve mentioned it once or twice.” A smile tried to lift the edges of her mouth. “I might consider forgiving you.”

  “You might, eh?” In the dim light, it was hard to tell if his eyes were twinkling or not. He stepped in front of her, arranging his snowshoes so he filled her space. His voice deepened. “What might it take?”

  Her first intention was to look him in the eye, grin, and dodge out of his reach down the trail. But that was before the emotion in his gaze captured hers. She stood transfixed, barely daring to breathe as he tipped his head and covered her lips with his own.

  This.

  She slid her arms around his neck and, for a long moment, kissed him back. His lips, gentle, not demanding, warmed her to the core of her being, clear to the bottom of her size-six boots. But this was hardly the time or place for nonstop smooching. Under a full moon on a cold January night, with other people snowshoeing past.

  On the other hand, what was wrong with that?

  ~*~

  Snowshoes didn’t make the best footwear for hugging and kissing, something Nick hadn’t particularly considered before. He couldn’t help the grin that forced its way from his mind to his mouth. Not that he wanted Lindsey to stop. He’d been dreaming of this moment on-and-off for years… constantly for a month.

  “What’s so funny?” she murmured.

  “Trying to decide if I want to keep snowshoeing or simply go somewhere more conducive to, um, doing more of this.”

  She leaned back far enough to look into his eyes with those baby-blues of hers, catching a glint from the lamppost by the bridge. She looked wary.

  He dropped a quick kiss to her mouth. “I mean nothing nefarious by that comment. I’ve waited years for this moment. I can wait… longer… for more.” How much longer, though? How long did he have to wait to put one ring on her finger, let alone two?

  “Years?” she asked with wonder.

  It took him a second to realize she was addressing his spoken words, not his thoughts. “Years.” He grimaced. “I was mean to you. Not immune to you.”

  “Never would have guessed.” She tipped her head sideways and bit her lip.

  Could he kiss it better? Maybe a bit of restraint would make a better impression when she clearly had something else to say.

  “So…” She watched him closely. “This secret admirer thing.”

  Which way to go? Admit it? Not? He chose the frown. “That chump still bothering you?”

  “Yeah. Every few days there’s something else. Candy, endearing gifts. A tasty little cupcake a few days ago from Carmen’s Cupcake and Confectionery.”

  “Wow. He sounds like quite the romantic guy.”

  “I’m not so sure. He’s never sent flowers. Aren’t roses the symbol of unending love?”

  Nick was pretty sure that was a diamond ring. “Maybe it’s been too cold for flowers. Ever consider that?”

  Lindsey shook her head. “Huh. You think that’s it?”

  “Just a guess.”

  She shuffled her snowshoe out from between his. “Race you to the next bridge.” She pivoted and took off in a lumbering run.

  “Hey!”

  She didn’t stop.

  Nick started laughing. He just couldn’t help it. All of the stress of the past few weeks, the angst of whether she’d ever forgive him, all dissolved in that moment of relief.

  Lindsey must be halfway to the finish line by now.

  Still chuckling, he ran after her, not as easy to do on snowshoes as she made it look. “Hey, wait for me!”

  She glanced over her shoulder, tripped, and tumbled into a snow bank, where she flailed to right herself.

  The old Nick would have rubbed snow in her face and tickled her while she was down. He wouldn’t promise that Nick wouldn’t show up again in good fun, but not tonight. Not in their new relationship after all their painful revelations.

  Nick reached for her hands and pulled her upright into his arms. “Did you enjoy your run?” he teased.

  “You tripped me!” she challenged, her cheeks rosy, her eyes bright.

  He burst out laughing. “I was ten meters away. I don’t think you can blame me for that one.” He ran his fingers through her hair, dislodging clumps of snow. “You okay? Didn’t twist an ankle when you went over or anything?”

  “No. I’m fine.” She glanced up the path. “So, are we finishing what we started or what?”

  A wee bit competitive, this Lindsey girl. He wrapped his hands around her cheeks. Also a bit cold. He kissed her, using all his self-restraint to keep it to one short kiss with a hint of promise. “We’ve started more than one thing tonight. We don’t have to finish everything right now.”

  Her eyes darkened in the dim light. “What have we started, Nick? What is this?” Her gloved hands tangled with the front of his jacket.

  The million-dollar question. He knew what he hoped to have started. He’d tried for ten years to get her out of his mind and been unsuccessful at it. He’d prayed for her often since coming to know the Lord, and way more often still in the past few weeks since she’d slid back into his life. She was the one.

  She hadn’t been waiting for him the way he had for her, so, to her, any declarations of unending love would need to wait. She was worth treating like a princess. Worth the trail of gifts to make sure she understood how much she meant to him. He wouldn’t rush in and throw his plans to the winter wind.

  “What’re you thinking, Nick?”

  “What have we started?” He dropped a kiss to those upturned lips and nearly groaned. “We’ve started what just may be the adventure of a lifetime. I can’t wait to see what’s around the bend, can you?”

  The glimmer in her eyes warmed him to the core. “Pretty sure there’s just the same windy, snow-covered trail for, what did you say, a million kilometers?”

  Oh, she was going to pretend to misconstrue his words, was she? “There’s only five to go. Or we could catch a ride back from the next road crossing.” He caressed her cheeks and jaw, holding her face between his hands. She felt warmer now. “What do you want to do?”

  She stretched and planted a kiss on his lips.

  Nick slid his arms around her and pulled her closer. “I wouldn’t mind doing more of that, myself,” he murmured against her fluttering eyelids.

  Chapter 9

  Saturday morning Lindsey stretched under her down comforter, her sore leg muscles reminding her of every step she’d taken on snowshoes last night. Under a full moon. With Nick Harrison.

  All. Those. Kisses.

  Who’d ever have guessed he’d been interested in her, praying for her, all those years? Was he… the one?

  She squished the teddy bear, the most recent gift from her secret admirer, just as a light tap came at her bedroom door. “Linds?”

  “I’m awake, Madison. Come in.” Her sister was going to want to know everything. How much info did she want to have going around the youth group? Nick was their pastor.

  Her brain hit the brakes. She was absolutely crazy to fall for a pastor. Last night it had been easy to forget, even with his coming-to-Jesus story. But in reality, a pastor’s life was way different than a chef’s. Or an electrician. Or a guy who worked shift at the nearby sawmill. Nick was more spiritual. She… well, she really wasn’t.

  Madison jumped on the bed. “Was it amazing? Did he kiss you?” She grabbed a pillow from under Lindsey’s head — thunk — and settled in, cross-legged and bright-eyed.

  Probably half the town had snowshoed past while they were lip-locked. Denial wasn’t going to get her anywhere. Lindsey nodded.

  “He kissed you?” Madison’s eyes grew larger as she pressed a hand over her heart.

  “Yup.”

  Madison collapsed backward on the bed. “He kissed her. They’re getting married.”

  Lindsey tugged the teddy bear out from under the blanket and threw it at Madison. Her secret admirer had to be Nick, didn’t it? Not that he’d admitted to anything when she asked. “Not so fa
st, missy.”

  “First comes love…”

  Lindsey shook her head. “Madison, grab your brain. One kiss does not an engagement make.” More than one kiss. But the principle was the same.

  Madison propped herself up on one elbow. “Do you go around kissing every guy you go meet?”

  “Of course not!”

  “When’s the last time you got kissed?”

  As though it was any of her snoopy little sister’s business. Lindsey edged to a sitting position, leaning against the white-painted headboard. “Been a while.” Never like that.

  Madison flopped onto her back. “Just as I suspected. Can I be your maid-of-honor?”

  Lindsey blinked. “I said put on the brain brakes. Good grief, girl.”

  “Well, can I?”

  “Um, no, you can’t. You have to be nineteen to sign legal paperwork in British Columbia.” Which brought up an interesting question. Whom did she want to stand up for her? Speaking of runaway thoughts…

  “Well, that’s a bummer. I can be a bridesmaid, though, right? Don’t forget I look great in pink.”

  “I — um — I’ll keep that in mind.”

  “You and Nick Harrison…” Madison’s dreamy voice faded dramatically. “Lindsey Ann Harrison.”

  Lindsey flipped as much of the duvet on top of Madison as she could before rolling her legs off the edge of the bed. “Want to bake cupcakes with me today? I want to practice some decorations for the fundraising banquet.”

  “Sounds fun.” Madison’s voice was muffled by the comforter. “The banquet colors are chocolate brown and cream and pink. And we need hearts everywhere.”

  Lindsey couldn’t resist tickling Madison’s bare feet hanging off the edge of the bed. The feet kicked at her before being inhaled under the flipped-over comforter.

  “I’ll get a shower then make us some breakfast,” Lindsey said, heading for the door. “Cupcakes after that.”