Total Control (Losing Control Series Book 3)

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Total Control (Losing Control Series Book 3) Page 23

by Wilder, Desiree


  Just wanted to say good nite. Hope ur having fun with Sean, but not too much! ;) I love you

  I texted back;

  We had fun, but not too much :) I’m saving myself for someone See u soon, I can’t wait!

  He responded;

  Mmm, I can’t wait either

  Then me again;

  Mmm is right I hope u can keep up

  Then him;

  Keep up? Or Keep it up?

  Me;

  Both :)

  Him;

  I’ll do my best

  Me;

  I’ve no doubt Sweet dreams baby

  Him;

  Sweet dreams Hotness

  “How’s Ethan?” Sean asked.

  “Good. Did you eat all the ice cream?”

  “No, I wouldn’t dare, not with you around.” He chuckled as he handed it to me.

  “You’re not as funny as you think you are.”

  “Actually, I am.”

  I set the empty ice cream container on the coffee table and got comfy again. I remember laughing at the movie with Sean a couple of times, but then I must’ve crashed and slept like a log. When I opened my eyes in the morning, a huge smile came over my face. I was going home today! Sean was still sleeping, so I went into the guest bath and showered. I took extra care getting ready, as I knew I’d be seeing Ethan soon. As I repacked my toiletries, I smelled coffee.

  “Good morning,” Sean said when I joined him in his kitchen. “How’d you sleep?”

  “Hard. How about you?”

  “The same. What would you like for breakfast?”

  “Coffee is good for me.” I’d been eating breakfast every morning for the last thirty days, but I had too many butterflies.

  “Turning down food? Are you feeling okay?” He smiled.

  “Ha, ha. My nerves are messing with me, and getting on a plane with a full stomach doesn’t sound like a good idea.”

  “Why are you nervous, Gia?” He was concerned.

  “I think I’m more anxious than anything. Once I get in the air, I’ll be fine.” I always hated the buildup to traveling.

  “Okay. I know you won’t, but you can stay longer if you need to. You’re always welcome here.” He gave me a hug.

  “Thanks, Sean.” We sat and talked over my coffee and his cocoa. He said I could give Brynn his number, but if it ended badly, he didn’t want me to hold it against him. As if! I didn’t think there was anything he could do that would change the way I felt about him. He was glad about that as he went off to take a shower.

  ***

  I hate good-byes at airports. I was relieved we’d said all that we needed to say the night before, and I told Sean not to get all mushy with me. He said he’d just slow down and push me out at the curb if I wanted. “You would not,” I said.

  He stayed with me until I was ready to go through security. My heart was having palpitations and I had to concentrate on breathing. I didn’t know why, but I was having separation anxiety. I wanted to watch over him as badly as he wanted to watch over me. We’d become close and protective of one another.

  He hugged me. “I love you, Gia.”

  “I love you, Sean.” He was my best friend, without benefits.

  I promised I’d let him know when I landed and was soon in my seat on the plane. I read a magazine all the way to my first stop. As I waited to board the plane home, I had a bite to eat and called Mom and Dad. When I was finally airborne again for the final leg of my journey, I got my ear buds out and listened to the rest of the playlist Ethan had made me.

  Pat Benatar – All Fired Up. “I’ll never be able to hear this song again without seeing you on the stage belting it out for me, and I’d never want to. You still owe me a Shadows of the Night encore.”

  I laughed. Yes, I owed him an encore all right.

  Journey – Open Arms. “I was so turned on watching you cook me dinner in your kitchen. When you straddled me in the chair and had your naughty way with me, it proved that even a quickie with you is an unforgettable experience.”

  Mmm. The quickie in the kitchen. I couldn’t have told you what song was playing, but I remembered the play.

  Def Leppard – Pour Some Sugar On Me. “Hot little you in your hot little car. That’s all I’ve got to say about it. Well, except, you’re hot.”

  It was so hot when he told me I was hot.

  Bad English – When I See You Smile. “I’ve never heard this song while I was actually around you, but every time I’ve heard it, you were with me.”

  I closed my eyes and listened to the lyrics. It made me all warm and fuzzy inside. My butterflies were going crazy. He’d spent a lot of time and thought making me that playlist. He was the most thoughtful man I’d ever known. How’d I get through my life so far without him? I wanted to be with him, always. I gasped at the thought. I’d never actually, seriously considered it, the possibility, anyway. I checked my face in my little mirror as we descended into the city. As soon as we landed, I texted Sean that I was home safe.

  As I came down the corridor, my knees got weak, anticipating the sight of him. I turned the corner and looked across the room. There he was, hot as fuck, holding a sign that said, “Gia Elizabeth Anderson Stone,” and a single red rose. We met somewhere in the middle. I jumped into his arms, wrapped my legs around him, and kissed him like it was the first time. We made quite a scene, but we didn’t care. It was like no one else existed.

  “Honey, I’m home,” I whispered in his ear when I caught my breath.

  He was holding onto me like a tornado was about to rip through the airport. I’d never seen him so happy, relieved, and content. It was the best moment of my life, almost. I got on my feet again and we locked eyes. “What is it?” I asked him. I could tell.

  He backed away from me and held up the sign again. I read it again, “Gia Elizabeth Anderson Stone…” I hadn’t noticed the dot, dot, dot. He flipped it over. It said, “Lockwood?” What? I gasped. He was smiling, I was agape.

  “Don’t freak out,” he said softly. “It’s got no ‘reply by’ or expiration dates. It’s something I want, and I wanted you to know it. It’s a life sentence, no time off for good behavior.” He winked. “I didn’t buy you a ring, or pick out china. I want you to know you have options, for your fresh start, and starting over with me is one of them.” I wish someone would’ve taken a picture of me at that moment. There I was with my mouth and eyes wide open, my knees trembling and weak, my face all red from the blood my heart was trying to pump at an alarming rate. I was in complete shock and disbelief. “Gia, please take a breath before you pass out. I haven’t finished my speech, and as much as I’m enjoying your reaction, I want you to be conscious for it.” What? Oh, okay. I took a deep breath. He chuckled and continued. “I don’t even want an answer right away, I want you to take your time and consider it.” He handed me the rose and put his arm around me, leading me to the baggage claim. I was speechless. I was overwhelmed. I was in love.

  Ethan grabbed my suitcase off the carousel, and as he turned to head for the exit, I grabbed his arm. He looked at me. “I love you, Ethan,” I said.

  His face was soft and his eyes lit up like stars. “What?” he whispered.

  “I love you, Ethan. I. Love. You.” I said it! And I meant it, with all my heart. We were both smiling from ear to ear. We looked like a couple of crazies, I’m sure, but we didn’t notice or care.

  The ride to The Lock was long. I wanted to make out, no, I wanted to make love, no, I wanted to go fast, no, oh hell, I wanted it all. My hormones were raging when Ethan pulled the Chevy up to his place. He hadn’t even put it in park yet when I straddled him. I was breathing heavy when my mouth met his and I wished I’d worn a skirt. My ass was against the steering wheel, so I pressed against him hard enough to slide down between it and him. I finally felt some pressure between my legs and I moaned. I lifted my face and Ethan was at my neck in an instant. It felt sweet and fucking hot all at the same time. I knew we couldn’t get naked out here in the parkin
g lot with the thousands of people around, so I reached back and opened the door while my lips met his again.

  Without missing a beat, Ethan slid out of the truck. My legs locked around him and he stumbled to his front door. My mouth got reacquainted with his neck and ear as he fumbled his key into the hole. The door banged against something inside as Ethan forced it open. He slammed it behind us and pushed my back against it as he thrust his hardness right where I needed it. I thought I might spontaneously combust as I wriggled in to feel him harder. My shirt flew across the kitchen and his followed in an instant. My bra sailed to a faraway location as his mouth greedily took its spot. His breath was warm and his tongue even warmer. I’d forgotten how soft his skin was as it shuddered under my touch.

  Shoes hit the floor, buttons popped open, and underwear were lost as we made our way to the table. I gasped and arched as my back hit the coolness. Our tongues played chase while our hands ran wild over each other’s now damp bodies. Our stomachs were sticking and beads were forming around his hairline. As his eyes met mine, he entered me slowly. We moaned through our stifled breathing. My nipples rubbed his chest as he eased in and out. My legs tightened around his body as I pulled him in deeper. “Ethan,” I breathed. My eyes were closed as I savored every move he made. “Yes.” He moved faster, harder, as it built up inside me.

  My body tightened as it anticipated the release. I moaned and sighed as it washed through me, making me release my grip and melt down into the table. Ethan’s face was buried in my neck as he moaned and melted into me. I sighed and ran my fingers through his hair and down his back, making him bring his hips forward again. I tightened my legs around his body and began moving slowly, back and forth, as I kept him where he still was, deep within.

  He lifted his face to mine and raised his eyebrow. “Oh, yes,” I whispered. “I need one more.” He chuckled and the movement his body made when he did, made me wish I had something hilarious to say. “Mmm.” He raised his eyebrow again. He tried to mimic it, short, subtle thrusting. My head went back and my breathing got shallow. It felt amazing as I started the build up again. I was still sensitive from the first one, and as he reached down to touch me there, I held my breath in anticipation. His fingers were strong and all I needed by then was five seconds. My back arched and I moaned loudly, holding there while it rushed through me. I jerked from the aftershocks and sighed hard, laying back down on the table.

  “Nice,” he said, smiling. “Very nice.”

  “That’s not the word I would’ve chosen, but hell yeah, it was.” I sighed again.

  He kissed me and made his way to the bathroom. We hadn’t taken the time to turn on any lights, so I was searching for all my clothes with only the light from one window. I found my panties and shirt, and as he headed out of the bathroom, I went in. As I washed up, I noticed something different. The wash cloths were new. So were the towels. I think he painted in here, too. Yes, it was more colorful than it had been. There was even a new rug. That’s nice.

  “You redid your bathroom, I like it,” I hollered to him as I put my shirt on.

  “Yeah, I had to keep myself busy while you were gone.”

  I walked out of the bathroom and yes, he had been busy. With the lights on I could see everything was freshly painted, with color. Some of the furniture was new. There were lots of pillows and throws, even some fresh flowers. “Wow, Ethan, I love this!”

  He was leaning against the back of the couch, smiling at me. “I wanted you to be more comfortable here. I’m so relieved you like it. Dana and Jo helped me pick stuff out.”

  “Really? That is so sweet.” I loved it. It reminded me of my apartment. As I looked around, I noticed a door where there hadn’t been a door before. It was off the bedroom area. I walked over to it, it had a small sign hanging on it. “Shh, Gia’s meditating,” it said. I spun around to look at Ethan. He was still leaning against the couch, hands in his front pockets, smiling at me. He nodded toward it, telling me to go in. I turned the knob and pushed it open.

  “Oh my god!” I screamed when I flipped the light on. There was a little landing and then two steps down to a sunken area. It was beautiful. The furniture, the fixtures, the candles, the Buddha, all of it. The walls had inspirational quotes in beautiful frames and pictures of serene places. I walked up to the two most prominently hung items. On the left was a picture, it was very familiar. It was the big tree up on the hill at Sunset! I quickly looked at the framed quote on the right. “Don’t look back, you’re not going that way,” it said in calligraphy. Tears ran down my cheeks. It was what Sean said to me in Laura’s office. I turned to run to Ethan, but he was right beside me. I threw my arms around him. “Thank you,” I whispered. “Thank you so much.” I was in awe of the thoughtfulness of that man.

  “You’re so welcome.” He stroked my hair and kissed the top of my head. “After hearing you talk about how much you loved meditation in treatment, I wanted you to have a place to keep it up when you came back.” He paid attention to everything I said.

  “You’re amazing.” My heart was overflowing.

  “C’mon, I put a pizza in when you were in the bathroom. Are you hungry?” Actually, I was. I had a little something on my layover, but that was it all day.

  “Yes, very.”

  “I figured you hadn’t had pizza in a while,” he said. I couldn’t bear to tell him that Sean and I had had it the night before, but I wasn’t going to lie, either.

  “That’s sweet, thank you.” I gave him a kiss.

  I hopped up on that spot on the counter, where I’d sat several times before, and watched him slice it. We sat, across from each other, watching each other eat; it was familiar. I caught him staring at my legs, dangling off the edge.

  “You weren’t kidding about all the working out you were doing.” He kept staring. “You’re rock hard.”

  “Now we can work out together, in the flesh.” It would be so much better than my daily fantasy.

  “If I get in the gym with you looking like that, the only working out I’m gonna be interested in will be on top of you.”

  I giggled. “Bring it on.”

  I finished getting dressed and we decided to watch the rest of the concerts. Firehouse was almost finished, but we got to slow dance to When I Look Into Your Eyes. Ethan whispered the lyrics in my ear, “I see forever when I look in your eyes, you’re all I’ve ever wanted, I always want you to be mine.” We made out like no one was watching.

  I got a text from Dana. She and Jo were there and wanted to meet up. Ethan and Trey went to get drinks while the girls and I caught up.

  “We wanted to go to the airport with Ethan, and although he said we could, we knew he was hoping to have some alone time with you,” Dana said. I told them about what happened.

  They were both as agape as I’d been. “Holy shit, Gia!” Jo had tears in her eyes. “You should’ve seen him while you were gone. He was a mess trying to get this and that just right for you when you got here. How’d you like what he did to the house?” They were so excited about it.

  “I love it, of course. Thanks, you two. Ethan said you helped.”

  “Gia, that meditation sun-room thing, was an afterthought. You should’ve seen him panic when you called Wednesday and told him you were coming home early, we thought he was gonna have a breakdown trying to get it done in time!” They laughed.

  Jo turned serious. “He’s got one thing on his mind, Gia, and that’s to make you as happy and comfortable as he possibly can. He loves you more than anything in this world.” She smiled and hugged me. “You deserve it, too.”

  “I never knew there were guys like him,” I started, but they interrupted me.

  “There aren’t!” they said in unison, which made us all laugh.

  “I’m in love with him,” I said. “I love him so much that I’m not afraid anymore, of anything.” I was very confident as I said it. I could face anything as long as I had him.

  They were both staring at me with looks of satisfaction on the
ir faces when Ethan and Trey returned with drinks. Dana made a toast to me and my triumphant return. We all took in Warrant together and it was a perfect night. When Ethan and I got back to his place, we undressed for bed and I could tell he was totally spent.

  “Baby, we can catch up some more tomorrow,” I told him. “Right now, I’m going to massage you until you fall asleep.”

  “I’d argue with you if I weren’t so exhausted, and if it didn’t sound like something I could really go for right now.” He smiled sleepily.

  He laid on his stomach and I straddled his middle. I massaged his neck and shoulders. He melted into the mattress. I massaged and scratched his back, slow and thorough, making sure to cover every inch. He tried to lift his head at one point, but I whispered, “Shh, just relax,” and it fell back to the bed. He drifted off with a smile on his face. I slowly pulled myself off of him and snuggled in next to him. I slept like a baby.

  Chapter 22

  Ethan

  Waking up next to her was sweeter than any dream I could’ve had. The last thing I remembered was feeling her hands on my back and wanting to return the favor, but she wanted me to relax, and did I ever. It had been a whirlwind week, trying to get everything done for her before she got back. Looking at her then, sleeping so peacefully beside me, made it all seem so trivial. Stressing about getting it all just perfect for her, which was what she deserved, but she loved me, and I knew she’d have loved me just the same with or without the fresh paint and the pillows. I was still going to give her everything, but it wasn’t to get her to stay, it was because she deserved it, and I finally had someone to share with and give to. It was so gratifying to give and to share with her.

  I kissed her shoulder softly and eased out as not to wake her. I showered, left her a note, and headed to the morning meeting. The staff was in good spirits, ready to start the day, and there wasn’t much to go over, so the meeting was short and sweet. I could tell Rose wasn’t feeling her best. I felt guilty for letting her talk me into having her help with Gia’s meditation room. I insisted she take the rest of the day off to relax. I was about to text Gia to tell her I’d be longer than I thought, but she texted me first.

 

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