Wolf5pub

by K Matthew

  All the way until Emmett began speaking, my mind raced with thought, in a strange panic from emotional overload. In that moment, I wished that Chris was seated beside me, holding my hand and telling me it would be alright, like I had comforted him when it was time for his introduction. There was no comfort for me though, and I had to pretend to be strong.

  “Welcome, members of the Blackfoot pack,” Emmett began, drawing my attention up to the front of the room. “As you all know, Ms. Taya Raveen was assigned to stay with us for a month while she worked on her journalist piece for the National News Network. It seems that she grew so fond of us that she's decided to just move on in.”

  There was a light surge of laughter from the crowed.

  He continued, “I'd like you all to give her a warm welcome. Taya, please stand up.”

  I did as I was told, and as I did, the werewolves began to clap, welcoming me into their fold. When I looked down on their faces, most of the smiles seemed genuine, only a handful gazing at me with distaste.

  “You can sit down now, Taya,” Emmett told me, and I was more than happy to do so. “Since Taya introduced herself to you already, and she's had a chance to speak with most of you one on one, there's no need for introductions tonight. Let's get our feed bag on. Taya, if you would lead the alphas and betas to the front of the room so that we can start serving everyone.”

  As I put two slices of cheese pizza on my plate, I thought back to Chris's celebration and how I hadn't wanted to be at the front of the line because I could have pizza anytime I wanted to. Now, it was a rare treat, something that I would greatly come to appreciate. I couldn't help but think about all the other common comforts that I had taken for granted on the outside world. Choosing my own clothing, being able to wash my clothes whenever I wanted to, going shopping, traveling. It had all been stripped away. Rex had stripped it all away. My eyes turned to the place he had been sitting, but he was gone, the same as during Chris's celebration. I wondered why he had bothered to come at all.

  When dinner was over, Chris walked me back to my apartment. As I turned on the light, my breath hitched to find Rex sitting on my loveseat. Protectively, Chris pushed his way in front of me, creating a barrier between Rex and I.

  “Who are you and what are you doing in here?” Chris demanded.

  That's right, Chris didn't know Rex. Even though Rex had been at Chris's welcoming celebration, I doubted that Chris would have taken notice of him. Beyond that, they had never met before. Chris only knew him by name.

  “I came to speak to Ms. Raveen . . . privately, if I may.” Rex stood, preparing for confrontation. Both of their fists were clenched, waiting for the other to strike.

  “Chris, it's alright,” I said, touching his shoulder lightly. “I'll speak to him. Go home. We'll catch up later.”

  “Who is he?” Chris demanded, and I could tell by his eyes that he already had an idea.

  “Someone that I need to talk to,” I replied sternly before holding the door open to indicate that he should leave.

  Chris gave Rex a weary look before turning from him. The look he gave me was even worse, but it quickly melted into concern as he paused. “Can I talk to you outside for a minute?”

  “Sure. Do you mind?” I glanced at Rex, and he shook his head before sitting back down on the loveseat.

  Almost before the door was closed behind us, Chris began to whisper, “Are you going to tell me who he is and why you need to speak to him alone or not?”

  “I think you know who he is, and I want to know what he has to say to me.”

  “You want to be alone with him after what he did to you?” He pointed to the door, incredulous. “What if he tries to do it again?”

  “He won't.”

  “How do you know he won't?”

  “Because I just do.”

  “That doesn't make any fucking sense, Taya.”

  “Chris, lower your voice, you don't need to yell at me.”

  “Well, it doesn't.”

  I could see the mix of emotions on his face, anger and confusion and . . . accusation. A small huff left my lips at the last one. “Listen, if I thought he was dangerous, I wouldn't want to be alone with him.”

  “Well he is dangerous. Maybe you're just too stupid to see that.”

  I was taken back by the harshness of his words. How dare he call me stupid?

  “Leave,” I told Chris. “Now. I will talk to you later. I'll come over after he leaves so that you'll know I'm alright.”

  “Oh, don't bother.” He threw his hands up at me and stomped off, leaving me standing there feeling absolutely horrible. Had I made a mistake by actually wanting to talk to Rex?

  With a deep sigh, I opened the door and went back inside. Rex was staring at his feet, but when he heard the door close behind me, he looked up.

  “Apologies. I told him about you,” I said before seating myself on the bed.

  “His concerns have merit then.”

  “Should they? He thinks you'll try to force yourself on me again. That's not what you came here for though, was it?” I tried to sound strong, but there was still a sense of uncertainty.

  “No, that's not what I came here for,” Rex reassured me.

  “Why are you here then?”

  “I came to ask you to come back with me.”

  This completely took me by surprise. “What?”

  He looked away. “I want you to come live with me.”

  “Why?”

  “Because it's the only way I can protect you from Emmett, and I feel like I owe you at least that much.”

  “I don't need your protection.”

  “You don't think you do, but you do.”

  “Chris can protect me.”

  “But will he? He doesn't even know what to protect you from.”

  “I'll tell him,” I insisted.

  A short laugh escaped Rex's lips. “I kind of figured you wouldn't want to come.” He paused. “I suppose you told the compound about me too.” It was more of a question than a statement.

  “I did,” I was afraid to admit.

  “They had a perfectly good chance to grab me at the celebration, but they didn't. That should tell you how much protection you can expect to get inside of here. I could have done much worse to you, but as long as they knew you had the lycanthropy disease, they won't care.”

  It was something to consider. If the compound knowingly allowed Rex to get away with rape, then they definitely wouldn't bat an eye if Emmett did it too.

  “I'm sorry you came all the way out here for nothing,” I said finally. Chris would protect me; I was sure of it.

  “I know that this seems out of left field.” He stood to leave. “But I'm going to give you some time to think about it. I'll come see you after the hierarchy trials to see if you changed your mind.” He laughed shortly. “I'm sure that you will if you end up omega. Word on the street is that you didn't do too good at the last trials.”

  My chest tightened at the memory. “Once I place at the hierarchy trials, I can't leave,” I mumbled.

  “That's bullshit. They just make you think you've gotta stay and put up with their crap.”

  “I'll keep that in mind,” I said softly while leading him to the door.

  All the way to Chris's unit, I thought about what Rex had said. It was still odd to me that he came all this way just to offer his protection. Perhaps he truly did feel guilty for what he had done. Why else would a lone wolf consider not being so alone?

  On the third knock, Chris opened the door, and I could sense the hesitation in his eyes when he did. He had thought about not answering it at all, which sent a twinge of pain to my heart. Was he really that angry with me?

  “I'm fine,” I said, trying not to seem awkward.

  “I see that,” Chris replied, gazing down on me. “What did he want?”

  “Can I come in? I'd rather not talk about it out here.”

  He looked around suspiciously before opening the door to me. Our units were so identic
al that I might have been tricked into thinking that I was still in my own. Everything was plain and bare, stripping down to the basics.

  I took a seat on the loveseat and waited for him to sit on the bed before I spoke, “I told you why he raped me, because he thought I would work harder to find a cure if I was infected.”

  “Yeah.”

  “After he raped me, he told me about this cage that he had at his house where I could go to shift safely. I know it's hard to believe, but he was trying to help me. He also told me that I didn't want to land back in here because Emmett has his own way of initiating females into the pack.” I gave him a dark look, but Chris still seemed confused.

  “Well, what is it?” he asked, annoyed that I wasn't spelling it out for him.

  “He has sex with them.”

  Chris rolled his eyes incredulously, finally grasping my meaning. “I don't believe that. Emmett's not a model citizen, but he's not a rapist either.”

  “How do you know? Have you ever seen a new female be brought into the group? Have you asked around?”

  “Do you realize how stupid that sounds? Emmett is the alpha. They wouldn't allow him to be in a leadership position if he went around raping women.”

  “The compound doesn't care what happens in here,” I insisted. “I told them that Rex raped me. Did you see them grabbing him at the welcoming celebration?”

  He thought for a moment. “Maybe they didn't want to make a scene.”

  “If they cared, he wouldn't have been able to freely walk into my unit.”

  Chris sighed. “I still don't buy Emmett being a rapist, but what did Rex want?”

  Anger was building under my skin at his unwillingness to believe me. My hands began to tremble, but I tried to hold myself steady. “He came to ask me to move in with him at the back of the reservation.”

  He huffed. “He probably just wants to rape you again.”

  I stood, frustrated to my wits end. “You know what, Chris? Forget I even said anything to you. Maybe he was right. Maybe you won't protect me when the time comes. Perhaps I should go with him.”

  He was quick to follow me as I made my way toward the door. “Taya, wait.”

  “No.” I turned on him, letting my emotions spew from my lips. “The only good thing about being in here to me was you, but it doesn't look like you care about what happens to me.”

  Chris grabbed me by the shoulders, stopping me from proceeding any further. “Taya, I do care, but I don't trust this Rex guy. I know Emmett.”

  “Do you? You've only seen what he's wanted you to see. You weren't there when I interviewed him, and he asked me if I wanted to have sex.”

  I could tell that he was starting to get upset as well. “You didn't tell me about that. That still doesn't mean he's going to rape you though.”

  “Forget about it. Just forget about it.” I pulled away from him, stomping down the street back towards my unit the same as he had when he left mine. Furious was an understatement for how I felt. If Chris wouldn't stand by me, then . . . No, I could take care of myself. Emmett would not lay a hand on me; I'd make certain of that.

  Eerily in line with what Rex had told me, the next evening at dinner, Emmett invited me over to his house for a friendly visit. I politely declined, making sure that the entire table heard that I wasn't interested.

  Sasha giggled at me with a wide toothy grin, knowing. I could see it in her eyes. Rick seemed uncomfortable when Emmett asked me, though he said nothing. Even Margaret went silent waiting for my response.

  “It's customary for me to welcome new members of the pack by hosting them at my house for an evening,” Emmett said, giving no signs of deviant intentions.

  “I don't remember you inviting Chris over,” I replied plainly, trying to play like I didn't know what he meant. “Besides, you hosted me when I interviewed you. That was good enough. You're a busy man, and I don't want to take up anymore of your time than I have to.”

  “That wasn't the same thing.”

  “I'm sure it wasn't.” I dared to test him, but Emmett seemed unfazed by my comment.

  Chris was avoiding me again, and I was beginning to get tired of all the touch and go between us. Now that I was inside the reservation, we shouldn't be avoiding each other like this. He was supposed to be my rock—my support through this hard period of adjustment. It felt like an unfair shift from how I had been with him when he first arrived on the reservation.

  Although I missed Chris horribly, my pride kept me from reaching out for him. He would come around eventually, the same as he always had. It would just take some time.

  That night, while I was lying in bed watching the news, I heard a knock at my door. Thinking that it was Chris coming to apologize, I didn't even hesitate before opening it. My breath hitched when Emmett's broad frame came into view, blocking out the light from the moon. He smiled at me with an air of cockiness about him as he lifted up a bag of chips and a soda.

  “You didn't come to me, so I thought I'd bring the party to you,” he said.

  “Apologies, Emmett. I'm a bit too tired for partying right now. Perhaps another time.” It took everything in me to keep my hand from trembling on the door frame. My body was so on edge that it felt like my blood had frozen inside of my veins. I had never expected for him to come to me.

  “This won't take long,” Emmett promised, pushing his way through the door and looking around as if he had never seen the inside of an efficiency unit before. “It's small compared to your other one, isn't it?”

  I sighed, trying to show my lack of appreciation for him barging in. “The size doesn't bother me as much as I thought it would.”

  “Size always matters to women.” Emmett turned to me with a smirk.

  “I really am tired. I was just watching the news before bed.”

  “Do I intimidate you?” He took a step closer, causing me to freeze up.

  “What?”

  “Because you seem afraid of me.”

  “N-No. I just don't like being alone with you.”

  A small laugh escaped his lips. “Well, you should get used to it. There will be several times during your stay here that you'll have to be alone with me. In fact, any time I request that you have to be alone with me, you'll have to do it.” Emmett raised the hand that was holding the chips to caress my cheek with the back of his finger. Instinctively, I bent away from him, giving his finger a look of disgust.

  “Don't touch me,” I barked.

  “Why not?” Emmett's smile grew wider.

  “Because I . . . I” I thought about saying that I was a third degree black belt, but I was afraid he'd want to challenge that, and it was most certainly a lie. The truth of the matter was that I couldn't fight to save my life.

  My eyes darted around the room for the nearest object I could throw at him, but the damn unit was so bare that there was nothing. The only real option I had was to make a run for it, kicking and screaming if he got a hold of me.

  “You'll what?” Emmett mocked me.

  “I'll kill you,” was all that I could muster up, trying to seem as threatening as possible when I said it.

  He straightened, still grinning from ear to ear, holding up the chips and drink to either sides of him. “I come to offer you hospitality, and you threaten to kill me. You are a strange one.”

  “I don't want your hospitality. Please leave,” I said finally, trying to stand firm, though fear shook my very core.

  “Fine,” Emmett replied, and a wave of relief coursed through me as he went to walk out the door. He stopped briefly in the entrance way, turning back to me. “Tomorrow, you will be less tired. You will come to my home at seven o'clock in the evening. If you aren't present, I will come for you, and you won't like it if I have to come for you.”

  My heart thundered in my ears as I watched Emmett walk down the street and disappear out of sight. His words echoed in my mind, the threatening connotation of them. I had to think up a plan.

  In desperation, I ran to Chris's unit,
banging on the door. It didn't matter to me if he was asleep or not. He could damn well wake up.

  “What is it?” Chris asked as he opened the door with a groggy look on his face.

  “I need to come in,” I said, pushing past him before he even had the door open more than a crack.

  “What? I was asleep,” annoyance rang in his voice.

  “Emmett just came over. He said I'm to come to his house tomorrow night . . . or he'll come for me. I want you to come with me.”

  “I can't.” Chris closed the door behind me and rubbed his eyes.

  “Why not?”

  “Because Sasha wants me to come over tomorrow night.”

  Anger raged through me once more . . . or was it jealousy. “She just wants to fuck you,” I blurted out.

  “What if she does?” He shrugged.

  My heart sank, my body suddenly drained of energy, and all I could feel was defeat, pure, overwhelming defeat. I stood, brushing past him for the door. “I'm sorry I woke you.”

  “Now you're upset again.”

  “Chris, just don't.” I held my hand up to him before showing myself out. If he cared, he would have come after me, but he didn't. Instead, Chris closed the door behind himself and went back to bed, leaving me to walk home frightened and alone.

  Never before had so many negative feelings attacked me at the same time. I was generally a happy person. Nothing ever really got to me. But now, I just wanted to die. Any death would be better than a life on the reservation. It was said that the suicide rate among werewolves was high. Now, I fully understood why. My depression didn't stem from having the lycanthropy disease though, but from the consequences of having it. The Blackfoot Werewolf Reservation was worse than a prison; it was hell.

  I cried myself to sleep that night, went to breakfast the following day, and then skipped both lunch and dinner, hoping that Chris's concern for me would drive him to come check on me, where I could plead with him again to accompany me to Emmett's house that afternoon. I didn't want to go alone.

  When Chris didn't come, I made a last-ditch effort for support by going to Devon's place. He had upgraded to a larger unit, and seemed happier than a pig in shit as he opened the door to me with a bag of chips in hand.