Rock Chick Renegade

by Ashley, Kristen

Oh my God.

  That velvet feeling was back and it wasn’t only enshrouding me, it had Vance wrapped up in it too.

  “Crowe, stop talking,” I whispered.

  “You want to know more about me?” he offered and at that moment I didn’t. I couldn’t take anymore.

  I didn’t have the choice.

  “My life has been shit. I’d never been touched with gentleness, never understood it until I saw you handle Roam in Fortnum’s. Then that night watchin’ footbal with Nick, you showed it to me by runnin’ your fingers along my jaw after I told you the worst in me. I was once Roam, Jules.

  You might not think it but it isn’t the kids who have two parents and a stable home who are the luckiest ones. It’s parents and a stable home who are the luckiest ones. It’s the kids who know the taste of shit because they’ve been eatin’ it al their lives and then someone finds them and offers them a taste of somethin’ sweeter and they learn that life can be good. They learn to trust. They learn that if you care about someone you put your ass on the line to keep them safe. They learn that love doesn’t come with conditions. Roam and Sniff are the luckiest kids alive. I never had that. No one gave a shit enough to see it through.

  No one ever offered me that, until you.”

  It was my turn to hold his face. I put both hands up and kept them there.

  “Vance –” I started but he interrupted me again.

  “I’ve been playin’ this cool so I wouldn’t scare the shit out of you because you’re jumpy as a fuckin’ jackrabbit but I’m done with that now. I won’t listen to you cal yourself a freak and I’l let you know something else and I don’t give a fuck if it flips you out. If you ever think of takin’ off, if you ever get scared enough at what I do for a living that you decide you can’t hack it, then you best think again because unless what we have turns shit like everything else in my life, I’m not ever letting you go.”

  “Listen to me –”

  “Do you understand what I just said to you?”

  “Vance, please listen –”

  “Do you understand?”

  “Yes,” I said softly.

  He stared at me or more to the point glared at me.

  I decided it was time to come clean too. “Wel then, maybe you should also be aware of the fact that I know you have a reputation as a player and I know a lot of other people know that. If any woman tries to cut into my action, I’m taking her down.”

  I thought I sounded relatively badass and super-cool, for a girl.

  Vance just kept staring at me a beat, stil tense then his body relaxed and his lips turned up at the ends in an amused mini-smile.

  Um.

  No.

  “This isn’t funny. I’m serious. I’m a head crackin’ mamma jamma. You’re too handsome for your own good. I’l have to deck most of the single female population of Denver.” Even though I was, indeed, being perfectly serious, his body started moving and it felt a lot like laughter. He twisted and we went down, me on my back, him on top of me. By the time he came over me, I knew it was laughter mainly because it had become audible.

  I was offended.

  “Excuse me! This is not funny. How come you can make intense, macho man statements and I can’t?” His lips touched mine. He was stil laughing.

  “Shut up, Jules,” he said there.

  “Do not tel me to shut up,” I snapped.

  So he didn’t. Using hands, mouth, tongue and other parts of his anatomy, he shut me up a different way.

  * * * * *

  Vance made love to me, he did it slow, took his time and it was beyond beautiful. We took a quick shower, got dressed and went back into town.

  In a morning of significant moments, two more were stil to come.

  First, he told me to leave my stuff in the bathroom.

  “I can’t, I need it,” I told him.

  “Buy more,” he replied then walked into the kitchen to make toast (or, remake toast, I’d had a go and I’d burned it, twice).

  I added a trip to the mal on my mental agenda for the day and I had no problem with it whatsoever. In fact my pug had never been to the mal and he was al excited to go (something else about my pug, his fur and face and little wet nose felt like velvet too).

  Second, Vance fol owed me on his Harley al the way into Denver. I saw him in my rearview mirror and I didn’t lose sight of him until I turned my car into the garage behind the duplex. I knew this took him out of his way. His offices were in LoDo (lower downtown). He’d gone ten, fifteen minutes out of his way.

  I could not explain why this was significant but it was. I’d been on my own a long time and knowing someone had my back as it were, was just, plain nice.

  I dropped off Boo and his litter and my bag and went to King’s.

  May descended the minute I came through the door.

  I took one look at her stormy face and asked, “What?”

  “You stil together with Crowe?”

  What now?

  “Why?” I asked.

  “Tel me,” she snapped.

  “Yes. Why?” I snapped back.

  Her face melted and she was al smiles. “Just checkin’,” she said, storm cloud gone, al bouncy and happy. “You want a pudding cup?”

  “May, it’s eight thirty in the morning.”

  “There’s no time limit on pudding cups.”

  Jeez.

  She was grinning at me, pleased as punch that I was getting it regular.

  I looked at her.

  Home, the word came into my head in Auntie Reba’s voice and a warm shiver ran along my skin.

  “Love you, May,” I said softly.

  May blinked at me. “What’d you say, hon?”

  I walked the step of distance between us, put my hands on either side of her neck, bent at the waist and laid my forehead against hers.

  “Love you,” I whispered.

  I watched close up as tears fil ed her eyes.

  She tried to pul away. It wouldn’t be cool for the kids to see us like this but I didn’t care and I held on tight. Maybe they should see.

  “I think Vance loves me,” I whispered as I lifted my forehead from hers but kept looking in her teary eyes. “He looked at me this morning in a way, May, you wouldn’t believe. And he told me he’d never let me go.” May was stil staring at me. She’d never heard me share information about myself freely, certainly not something important, without her having to drag it out of me.

  I let her go but put an arm around her shoulders and walked her toward the office. The whole time my head was bent to hers and I told her about my morning.

  “Praise be to Jesus!” she shouted right before we disappeared into the hal .

  Al the kids (luckily, there weren’t that many of them that early in the morning) stared.

  * * * * *

  The morning was its usual madness. I cal ed my doctor to make an appointment to discuss birth control because I was done with the condom business.

  There might be ways to make it fun but Vance and I were kind of active (okay, really active) and spontaneous and enough was enough.

  My cel rang mid-morning. The display said “Crowe cal ing”.

  I flipped it open. “Hey,” I said.

  “Got time for lunch?”

  I didn’t and that sucked. “Not real y,” I told him.

  “I’l bring something to the Shelter.”

  I smiled into the phone. “That’d work.”

  “See you around noon.”

  My pug gave me a sleepy, puppy cuddle.

  “Okay,” I said.

  I went in search of Martin and Curtis and hustled them into the yel ow room. It was time to get to the bottom of why they’d run away so I could start fixing it but even though I knew I had their respect, they gave me nothing.

  We walked out of the yel ow room and one of the tutors, Stuart, was coming at me. The boys took off. Most of the kids avoided the tutors like the plague.

  “Hey Stu,” I said.

  “Got a problem,�
�� he told me. “Roam and Sniff had an appointment with me yesterday and today, they missed them both.”

  Hmm.

  Not good.

  Roam seemed al fired up to get an education so he could become a badass mother. Clearly he’d lost interest when he thought Vance was out of my life.

  “I’l take care of it,” I said to Stu and I went in search of the boys.

  Not stupid, they knew I’d come after them and I caught them making their getaway. I cornered them outside in front of the building.

  “You missed two tutor appointments,” I said to them.

  “What of it?” Roam asked, al lip and attitude.

  “You need to get caught up so we can enrol you in high school, get a foster home sorted, get your life sorted.”

  “Life’s good,” Sniff put in, in an attempt to assure me they knew what they were doing.

  My eyes sliced to him and the look in them made him clamp his mouth shut for once.

  I looked back to Roam. “I thought you wanted to get your diploma.”

  “Don’t matter now,” Roam said to me.

  “I don’t think you understand, what happened with me and Crowe –” I started.

  “I understand, Law, you know I fuckin’ do. Can’t trust no-fuckin’-body. You think they’re cool, got it goin’ on and you find out they’re just assholes. Everyone’s a fuckin’ asshole.” Hmm.

  Real y not good.

  I got closer. “Roam –” I started again but to my shock (and it must be said, supreme annoyance), he put both hands to my shoulders and shoved me hard. I went back on a foot and then steadied.

  “Fuck off, Law,” he clipped.

  “Hang on a goddamned minute,” I snapped but I’d lost his attention. His already tense body froze and he was looking over my shoulder.

  I looked too.

  Vance was there not a foot behind me. How he’d materialized, I did not know. I hadn’t heard him or sensed him but I couldn’t worry about that at the moment. Vance’s face was hard and set, his eyes were scary and his mouth was tight. I’d never seen him look that angry, in fact the word angry didn’t begin to do it justice.

  “What the fuck?” Vance’s eyes flashed on Roam.

  “What are you doin’ here?” Sniff asked.

  Vance didn’t take his gaze off Roam. “I said,” Vance went on, his deep voice quiet, pure silk but not in a good way, “what the fuck?”

  Roam brought himself up to ful height which was an inch tal er than Crowe but he stil looked like a boy. Crowe didn’t move from behind me and I could feel the white-hot vibes crackling between them.

  Roam didn’t answer.

  “Never,” Vance continued in his scary voice, “do you put your hands on a woman in anger.”

  Al of a sudden I was finding it difficult to breathe, realizing belatedly why Vance looked ready to commit murder. Roam swal owed, his eyes darted to me then went back to Vance but he kept his position, his guard up and his mouth shut.

  “Okay boys –” I decided it was time to cut in.

  Vance didn’t agree. “I see you do that again, I hear you did it, I’l find you and knock some goddamned sense into you,” Vance warned and I knew it wasn’t a threat and I suspected so did Roam. “Now’s the time when you nod your head,” Vance went on.

  Roam decided to play with fire. “Don’t see why it’s your fuckin’ business. You dumped her.”

  Uh-oh.

  “Roam, there’s been a –” I started again, and got interrupted again.

  Roam continued talking. “Thought you were the shit.

  Thought you knew a good thing. Thought you knew everything. You don’t know nothin’. You threw away a piece like that?” Roam’s head jerked in my direction. “You’re an asshole.”

  Yikes.

  “Roam,” Sniff said in a cautionary tone. Even Sniff knew Roam was carrying it too far.

  “Okay, listen to me right now –” I put in only to be thwarted again.

  “I have another rule,” Vance talked over me, his voice was stil scary however now it was scary- scary and I knew he was just hanging on to his control, “you cal Jules a piece again and you’l be sucking your meals through a straw. I don’t care if you’re a kid.”

  Roam looked from me to Vance and back again and opened his mouth to say something but luckily Vance got there before he dug his hole any deeper.

  “Only reason I don’t put my hands on you right now is because you’re pissed on Jules’s behalf. We had a misunderstanding. I didn’t dump her. We’re together, nothing’s changed, except the fact that I was gonna find you and offer you some time. You want that time, see what I do, understand why you have to be smart, you learn some goddamned control.”

  Roam’s face changed, confusion warring with hope.

  My face probably changed too mainly because Vance just offered to take Roam under his wing. I was finding it hard not to turn to him and kiss every inch of his beautiful face.

  “You’re stil together?” Roam asked.

  “Yeah,” Vance answered.

  “Hey! Cool!” Sniff exclaimed.

  “You didn’t dump her?” Roam went on.

  Vance didn’t bother responding.

  Roam looked at me. “Why didn’t you fuckin’ say anything?” he asked or more like accused and I knew he felt like a fool.

  “Sorry, Roam. I didn’t know I needed to inform you of the intricacies of my love life. I’l add your name to my girlfriend list and invite you to the next powwow,” I said it ful of attitude, hopeful y loving attitude, and went on. “And for fuck’s sake, stop saying fuck! ”

  The confusion faded from Roam’s eyes, leaving only the hope.

  He turned them to Vance. “I’l learn control,” he promised.

  “I fuckin’ hope so,” Vance responded.

  “It won’t happen again.”

  Vance nodded.

  The crackling, white-hot vibes disintegrated.

  Crisis averted.

  Thank God.

  “Go make an appointment with the tutor,” I ordered.

  “This mean I’l get to be a pal bearer?” Sniff put in.

  I looked to the heavens.

  Jeez.

  “Ring bearer, stupid. How many times do I hafta –” Roam started.

  “Tutor! Now!” I snapped in my word-is-law voice.

  Sniff grinned at me.

  Roam didn’t but his eyes were shining. “Later?” he said to Vance.

  Vance nodded again.

  They took off.

  I turned to Vance.

  He didn’t look ready to commit murder anymore. He was staring at the front door of King’s where Roam and Sniff had disappeared and he looked like he was thinking about something.

  “You okay?” I asked.

  His eyes came to me. “That boy’d lay his life down for you.”

  I blinked.

  Then I realized he was right. Not a lot of people would throw attitude at Vance like that especial y when he was promising physical retribution.

  I felt that velvet shroud coming around me again and I mental y snuggled into it.

  I looked at his empty hands. “I thought you were bringing lunch?”

  “I left it in the Explorer. Saw you with Roam and Sniff and didn’t have a good feeling about the body language.” He’d come to my rescue.

  “I want to kiss you right now,” I blurted.

  Oh jeez.

  Why did I say that?

  Before I could take it back or affect a head crackin’

  mamma jamma pose, Vance’s face went soft and sexy and his arms came around me, drawing me into his body.

  “Don’t,” I said, “we’re standing right out front, everyone can see. I already had a public display of affection with May this morning. I can’t take another direct hit to my street cred.”

  His head was descending, completely ignoring me.

  “Your street cred?” he asked, his voice silk again this time in a good way. His eyes were amused.

 
“Yeah.”

  “Fuck your street cred,” Vance said against my mouth and he kissed me. Not a touch of the lips but ful -on, open mouths, lots of tongue. I had no choice but to wrap my arms around his neck and when I did, he leaned in, I bent back and we went at it like teenagers.

  It took awhile for the cat cal s and wolf whistles to penetrate our invisible fortress. It was around the time a kid yel ed, “You go, dawg!” that I pul ed away.

  Vance and I looked to the entrance of the Shelter and at least a dozen (maybe more), kids were standing outside the door. May was there beaming from ear to ear. More kids, Stu and Andy were looking out the windows.

  We received an ovation, more whistles, cat cal s, shouts of raunchy encouragement and ful -on clapping applause.

  “God dammit,” I whispered to Vance’s neck, trying to pul out of his arms but they just went tighter.

  “I think that should do it,” he said to me and I looked into his eyes.

  “What?”

  “Don’t expect anyone wil think you’re dumped anymore.” Oh.

  Wel .

  I expected he was right.

  I relaxed in his arms and smiled at him, street cred be damned.

  He smiled back.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Toiletries and Tiaras

  This was my afternoon and evening:

  About ten minutes after Vance left from lunch came cal number one, Indy. “Hey, what’re you doin’ tonight?”

  “I have to go to the mal ,” I told her. “Vance made me leave my lotion and stuff at his house so I need to double up on toiletries.”

  “That is so cool!” she shouted so loud I had to take the phone away from my ear.

  “Um… you want to come to the mal ?” I asked.

  “Wish I could celebrate doubled toiletries but I’m meeting a couple of friends of mine, Andrea and Marianne at The Hornet. Want to pop around there after the mal , have a drink? They’d love to meet you and we can toast the toiletries. Or are you out with Vance?”

  “Vance has an uncertain schedule tonight,” I explained.

  “He’s gonna come to my place whenever he’s done. I’m thinking about going out and crackin’ heads later anyway.

  Probably shouldn’t have impaired judgment.” Or more impaired than normal.