Say You're Mine

by Diane Alberts

  He chuckled throatily and pressed inside her a little more. “I’d never do that.”

  “Steven, I—” She let out a strangled groan, cutting herself off.

  He thrust into her even more, his fingers still working over her sensitive clit. She screamed and reached behind her to grip his hips. “You were saying?”

  She let out an unintelligible groan.

  Then she slapped his ass. Hard.

  And that made the last string that held his control break free. He thrust all the way inside her with one hard stroke. She screamed, and her tight pussy clamped down on him as she came immediately. He moved inside of her blindly, forgetting all about the world around them, or why it was so important he retain control.

  All that mattered was this. Them. Together.

  “Lauren.” He pumped his hips faster and harder, his fingers still working over her. She climbed higher with him, her hips moving frantically beneath him. When he gripped her ass, digging his fingers into the soft flesh, she came again.

  And he was right there with her this time.

  In fucking heaven.

  He collapsed on top of her, his breathing harsh and fast, and tried to grasp his thoughts. They were all over the damn place. He’d let himself forget why it was so important he wait to make his move. He needed to make sure he could get his shit together before he took another step toward her.

  Before he broke her heart.

  Pushing off of her, he stepped back, swiped his forearm across his sweaty forehead, and swallowed hard. “Shit.”

  She glanced over her shoulder. “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing,” he said, not meeting her eyes.

  What the hell was she doing to him? Just the sight of her draped across the counter, ass up, made him want another round. But he couldn’t—shouldn’t—take her until he knew he could clean up his act. Until he was certain he could be her man, in every way, without ruining everything.

  So instead of touching her, he walked over to the trash, removed the condom, and ignored every instinct that told him to take more. As he pulled his pants up, the timer on the oven dinged. “Cake’s done,” he said drily.

  “Steven…” She stood, pressing a hand to her chest as the other smoothed her skirt back into place. She was deliciously disheveled, with swollen lips and a loose ponytail. “What are we doing?”

  He cocked a brow and tucked his semi-hard dick away. “Baking.”

  “That’s not what I mean.”

  Instead of answering her, he remained silent. To be honest, he didn’t have a damn clue. He’d had to have her. So he’d taken her. And he would do it all over again.

  When it came to her, he had no self-control.

  Once it became clear he wasn’t going to answer, she gave him her back and strode over to the sink to wash her hands. He tried to get a read on her emotions and failed. When she shut the water off, she grabbed a towel and dried her hands, still not turning his way. She opened the oven door and bent down to check the cake, and it reminded him of earlier, which made his pulse race even more.

  His thirst for her was ridiculous. They’d been friends for years without so much as a lingering touch, and now he simply couldn’t get enough of her?

  It made no sense…and yet it did.

  He washed his hands. Even though he made sure not to use a surface they needed for baking, he disinfected it after he was finished washing anyway. Anything to keep his hands busy, and his mind off of Lauren.

  Something caught his eye, so he bent and picked it up. It was her tiny red lace panties. She was wrist deep in icing, so he shoved them in his pocket in case the customer decided to show up early. Then he walked up behind her, stopping just short of gluing his body to hers. Hesitantly, he reached out and rested his hands on her shoulders.

  He still hadn’t answered her, and she hadn’t pressed him. She never did. But she deserved the whole truth, or he’d be no better than every other liar out there. He’d be a hypocrite. “The truth is, I don’t have a clue what the hell we’re doing.”

  She stilled beneath his palms. “Me either.”

  “I don’t want to lie to you.” He skimmed his thumbs over her soft skin. She felt so smooth under his calloused hands. All the shit he’d done and seen, and all the people he’d lost and saved, and this was the one thing that haunted him so deeply. This woman. “You never lie to me, so it only seems right to treat you with the same honesty you treat me.”

  She stiffened. “So don’t. I don’t need you to baby me, or worry about my feelings. I’m a big girl, and I know who you are. Even more importantly, who I am. And I don’t need you, or any man, to be happy with myself. I don’t—”

  “I’m not babying you.” He took a deep breath. “I’m lost.”

  “Aren’t we all?” She continued stirring. Her long brown hair tickled his chin, and she still smelled like heaven, salvation, and temptation, all wrapped up into one irresistible package that was Lauren Brixton. “I can’t remember the last time I thought I actually knew what I was doing with my life.”

  “But I can.” He spun her around gently, and she fought him at first. But she gave in and faced him. The feelings in her eyes—the uncertainty, the fear, the pain—sent a shaft of those very same emotions piercing through him. “I’m fucked up right now. Have been since I came home. I’ve been happy, I’ve been sad, I’ve been hopeful, and hell, I’ll admit it, I’ve been scared—but I’ve never been all of those things at once. Not until you kissed me.”

  She bit her lower lip. “Why?”

  “When you’re touching me, and I’m touching you, it just all…feels right.” He ran his thumbs over the soft skin of her shoulders again, unable to resist. “But I don’t want to break your heart, cupcake.”

  She rested her palms on his chest, one right over his heart. It sped up traitorously, showing her exactly how much she affected him. “Who said I was offering it to you in the first place? And if I was, then, whatever. It’s my heart to guard, or not. That’s my decision to make. Not yours.”

  “Shit.” He dropped a kiss on her forehead. “I wasn’t implying you were going to fall in love with me. I—”

  “And yet, you kind of are.” She frowned. “I don’t see you worrying about your heart, or your feelings.”

  “I don’t have one. It’s why I can’t stop myself from taking you, even though you deserve better, and it’s why in the end, I might ruin what we have.” He gritted his teeth. “And that’s what pisses me off the most—my willingness to risk everything for another chance to be in your arms. But it won’t stop me. I’m a selfish prick like that.”

  “Then I’ll make it easy on you.” She rested a hand on his palm, squeezing. “It’s done. From now on…we go back to being friends. And only friends.”

  For a second, he felt relief. She’d given him an out, and he could—should—take it. Keep their friendship intact, and safe, and regain control. Be smart for once.

  “No,” he said slowly. Clearly.

  She blinked at him. “No?”

  “You heard me, cupcake.”

  “But you just said—”

  “I know what I said, and it was the truth. It was. I wouldn’t lie to you, just like you wouldn’t lie to me.” He tipped her chin up, and she blinked up at him, her cheeks going rosy. “I might not have a clue what the hell I’m doing, or how this ends, but I’m gonna fight for this—whatever the hell it is, or whatever it could be—because with you, I’m me. The real me. But first, I’m going to become a man who is worthy of you, and then I’m never gonna let you go.”

  And with that, he walked out into the sunlight. Right now…

  He needed to fucking breathe.

  Chapter Thirteen

  After Steven’s surprising admission earlier that day, followed by his hurried exit from her bakery, Lauren didn’t know what to think anymore. He generally shied away from all intimacy and emotions of any sort—but he literally told her he was going to fight to keep her in his arms, no matter the ending to
their story.

  And that was terrifying.

  There were a lot of other descriptions that suited the situation as well. Excitement, happiness, disbelief, uncertainty, and hope. But, yeah. Terrifying was the one emotion that stood out to her the most.

  All these years, she kind of explained her inability to hold down a real relationship as Steven’s fault. She’d refused to even entertain the idea of being with a guy long-term. No other man lived up to him, and he didn’t want her, so it was okay that she didn’t fall in love, or even want to.

  The one man she could maybe love didn’t love her back.

  But if he was ready and willing to give them a try…and it failed? There was something wrong with her. If she couldn’t love Steven, then she couldn’t love anyone.

  Lydia poked her in the ribs. “Helllllo. Where are you right now?”

  “Uh…” Lauren sat up straight and picked up her beer. “I’m here. I swear.”

  Lydia fluffed her hair and pressed the tips of her fingers to her mouth, looking a little thinner and a little bit green. She’d been sipping ginger ale while waiting for the men to arrive for dinner, instead of wine or her usual appletini, and Lauren was pretty sure why. The other woman looked way too happy to have contracted a stomach bug. “The other problem is, and I’m going to take a wild guess here…Steven.”

  Lauren laughed uneasily. “Why would you think that?”

  “He’s living with you, right?” At her nod, Lydia sighed. “What did the numbskull do now? Is he bringing too many girls back to your place already?”

  Lauren’s cheeks flushed. “I don’t think you really want to go there with me. You’re his sister.”

  “No, really?” Lydia smirked. “Is that why he was always hanging around my house without a shirt on all those years?”

  “Lydia.”

  The strawberry blonde shrugged. The fact that her hair was the same exact shade as Steven’s never failed to escape Lauren’s notice. “Spill it. What did my idiot brother do now?”

  “Nothing. He did nothing at all.” Lauren shredded the napkin in front of her on the wood table. “I’m not mad at him.”

  “I never said you were,” Lydia corrected. “But he’s staying with you, and you’re being all quiet and pensive, so obviously something’s going on. It’s only safe to assume he’s involved somehow.”

  Lauren remained silent.

  After a while, Lydia sighed. “How’d you do it, by the way?”

  “How’d I do what?”

  “Get him to stay with you?” Lydia asked, pressing a finger against her red lips. “Did you make something up?”

  Lauren shifted uncomfortably. “I had an ex come into my house and grab some stuff when I got out of the shower last night, and it freaked me out…so I asked him to stay. I exaggerated my level of fear a bit, so he agreed.”

  “Good thinking on your feet. And I really appreciate you doing this for us.” Lydia twirled a piece of her hair on her finger. “And he won’t find out about your…exaggeration. You’re probably worried about that. I mean, with how much he values honesty, if he found out you lied—”

  “He’d hate me.” Lauren dropped the rest of her napkin. “Yeah, I know.”

  “I don’t think he could ever hate you,” Lydia said slowly. “He loves you too much for that.”

  “He doesn’t love me,” Lauren said quickly.

  “Not like that. I didn’t mean that,” Lydia assured her. “You two are like bros, and that’s how he loves you. He’s told me that, like, a million times. I used to tease him about when the wedding would be, and he would get so mad.”

  Lauren forced a laugh. “Yeah. I get the same way.”

  “It’s so cool that you two have managed to keep it platonic after all these years. Most people can’t do that, and when they don’t, it doesn’t end well.” Lydia scrunched her nose up. “I’ve seen it way too many times.”

  Lauren averted her eyes. “Yeah. Me too.”

  “But—” Lydia frowned and cut herself off. “Wait a second. Did something happen between you two? If so, I take it back. Forget I said any—”

  “N-No. Of course not.”

  Lydia relaxed. “Good. That would make what’s about to happen really awkward.”

  “Why?” Lauren blinked. “What’s about to happen?”

  “You know how last time you broke up with one of those jerks you date, and you were drinking, and you begged me not to let you pick another jerk?” Lydia swirled her straw in her soda. “And then you went and found another loser the next day?”

  AKA Brian. Lauren stiffened. “Yeah…”

  “Well, surprise.” Lydia grinned. “You’re single again, so I set you up on a blind date with a non-jerk before you could manage to find another one. And he’s here. Now.”

  “Wait. What?” Lauren shook her head so fast the world blurred. “No.”

  “Don’t worry. He’s great. Wait till you meet him.” Lydia grinned mischievously. “Mark! Over here!”

  “Don’t do that,” Lauren hissed, her cheeks going red-hot and her heart beating at a panicked pace. “Don’t call him over here. I didn’t agree to a freaking blind—”

  “Glad you made it,” Lydia said, her voice way too cheerful.

  A man’s shadow fell over them, and Lauren squeezed her eyes shut, unable to believe her luck. Why, of all nights, did Lydia have to pick tonight to follow through on that promise made over two months ago? It’s not like she could announce she was currently sleeping with Steven, and therefore kind of, sort of, out of the dating pool. Ugh.

  “Thanks for the invitation, Lydia.” He paused. “And you must be Lauren?”

  Forcing a smile, she turned to the man. “Nice to meet you, M—”

  Lauren cut off. Mark was the hottest man she’d ever seen—besides Steven, anyway. He had light blond hair, dark brown eyes, and a body that had to have been sculpted from the gods. He wore a loose gray shirt, but nothing hid the muscles that screamed out to be noticed.

  Steven was going to flip.

  He grinned. Good God, he was even hotter when he did that. “Mark.”

  “Right,” Lauren said quickly. “Uh, Mark.”

  “It’s nice to meet you. I work at the Shillings Agency, and just moved here from California.”

  So he worked with Steven. Even better.

  “Crap,” she blurted out, still distracted by his dazzling smile. When he looked confused, she forced a smile. She needed to lose this guy before Steven showed up. She had no idea where they stood, or what they were doing, but if he caught her talking to this guy—on a freaking date—he would understandably be upset. “Uh, I mean, cool. I bake things. In my bakery. That I own.”

  He laughed. “I like baked things. Where is this—?”

  “It’s on Chestnut, next to the bank,” Steven said from somewhere behind her.

  Of course he did. Of freaking course.

  “Steven.” She forced a smile, her heart racing. “Hi.”

  “What’s up, cupcake?”

  “Nothing,” she squeaked.

  He came up beside her, his gaze running down her body with a primitive possession burning in its depths before turning to Mark. “Lauren makes the best treats you’ll ever taste. You should check it out sometime. I could take you after work, if you’d like.”

  “That would be great,” Mark said, nodding.

  Lauren blinked at Steven. He didn’t seem jealous. Maybe she’d been putting way too much thought behind what he may or may not feel for her. And that bothered her more than it should have. “Thanks.”

  “She hand mixes everything to give it that homemade taste,” Steven said, clapping Mark on the back. “Gives everything she touches one hundred percent of her attention. Isn’t that right, Lauren?”

  Lauren swallowed. “Uh…”

  “How do you two know each other?” Mark asked, clearly confused.

  “From school as kids,” Steven said, his tone light. But then—oh God, then he frowned. And he gave her a long,
searching look. “How did you two meet?”

  She licked her lips. “I…uh, Lydia…” Crap. Her voice squeaked again. “Uh…”

  “Your sister set us up on a blind date,” Mark said slowly, staring at her strangely. She didn’t blame him. “Lydia’s your sister, right?”

  All three of them slowly turned toward Lydia…who smiled and waved, clearly unaware of the tension among them. Holt grabbed Lydia and whispered something in her ear, gesturing wildly. Her mouth dropped open, and she shook her head.

  “Yeah.” Steven’s jaw ticked. Twice. That was not a good sign. “She’s my sister, all right.” Then he stared at Lauren, fists tight at his sides. “And Lauren is my best friend.”

  He didn’t lay claim to her. Didn’t do some juvenile thing where he kissed her to show she was his, or throw his arm around her and pull her close. And yet, somehow…

  He managed to do exactly that with a few words.

  Lauren’s heart palpitated. She couldn’t look away from Steven, who held himself so tautly that it was a miracle he didn’t break. “I just found out about this, Steven.”

  Mark, for his part, caught on to the tension quickly enough. He cleared his throat and shifted his weight to the balls of his feet. “You know what? I think I misunderstood her. There’s clearly something going on between the two of you, and anyone with eyes can see that. Can I buy you both a drink to make up for all this confusion?”

  Lauren blinked. “We’re not…I’m not…”

  “We’re not together,” Steven interjected, his jaw harder than ever before. “That’s what you’re trying to say, right, Lauren?”

  Lauren stared at him, not sure what she was supposed to say. It wasn’t like they were going to announce to the world that they’d had sex a few times. It was no one else’s business, and Lauren only assumed he wouldn’t want to go around telling everyone.

  Had she assumed wrong?

  “I don’t know what to say at all,” she finally admitted.

  The men stared at each other.

  Stared each other down, was more accurate.

  Mark smiled, even though it was clear he wished he’d never come up to Lauren in the first place. She didn’t blame him. “So, about that drink?”