All the Wrong Choices

by C. A. Harms

  I hope she isn't too drunk to hear me clearly and to understand my words.

  "Don't you understand even when we were apart, you were still my everything?"

  There is an echo of collective sighs around us, but again all I can see is Dani and the way her eyes fill with tears. Her lower lip trembles, and I know without a doubt she understands.

  "And you'll always be my everything."

  Pressing my lips to hers once more, I cage her in, needing it only to be her and I for a minute. "I love you," I whisper to her lips. "I need you and only you."

  "You're making me cry, and it's killing my buzz," I chuckle because I know she's not upset about my seriousness. "But I love you too, and I'll never stop needing you."

  One day, soon, I will ask this woman to be my wife. And when she says yes, because I know she will, I'll spend the rest of my life ensuring she feels consumed with the love I give her.

  I never again want Dani to feel as if she is not good enough.

  Chapter Forty-Four

  Danielle

  I feel like I've been to hell and back.

  My head's pounding, my stomach is rolling, and my mouth feels like I've been chewing on chalk for days.

  Rolling over in bed and reaching out to find the mattress empty, I open my eyes. I immediately squint from the light spilling in through the blinds. Cringing, I roll and bury my head in the pillow.

  Why in the hell did I ever agree to a shot challenge with Molly? She is a queen of Tequila, and I am a dead woman. Or so it feels.

  I lay against the cool sheets, and though I want more than anything to move my body, I can't manage to muster up the strength. So instead, I relax, pulling the covers around me tighter, and I begin to fade.

  It's barely after four in the afternoon, and I still lay in a bed alone. Feeling much better than I had this morning, I roll over and start toward the bedroom door, stepping into the hallway. The house is quiet, with no sounds of the television playing or the radio.

  I don't find Jonah in the kitchen or even sleeping on the couch.

  There is no note explaining where he's gone, and I'm just about to search for my phone, so I can call him when I see movement outside near the pool.

  There he stands, shirtless with his back to me. A pair of swimming trunks hang low on his hips, and his back muscles flex as he walks along the edge of the water. I stand, watching him, feeling my body react to him even though we are so far apart. Jonah is eye candy, the kind of man women notice, and they linger a few seconds longer than necessary. I don't blame them. I did it, too, the first time I saw him. He takes pride in his body, which I greatly appreciate, it does wonders for his stamina, and I reap the benefits of his need to stay fit.

  And as if he can sense me watching him, he looks back over his shoulder and grins when he finds me there. Motioning with his head to join him, I practically run to the bedroom and discard my lazy sleep clothes for my favorite coral bikini.

  Pausing in front of the bathroom mirror, I comb through my hair with my fingers, brush my teeth and then grab a towel.

  With purpose, I stroll outside and enjoy when he looks over to find me standing next to the lounger. "Well, hello," his eyes scan over my body, and the familiar heat I always feel when he looks at me rolls through me like a warm wave. Immediately my nipples harden in response to his perusal.

  "Cleaning the pool?" I pretend not to notice the way his throat bobs as he swallows hard. I peek over the side into the crystal-clear water. My skin is feeling heated though it has nothing to do with the sun beating down from above. Dipping my toe in the water, I drag it along, focusing on the ripple effect it leaves behind.

  "Dani," I don't look up right away, hearing the ache in his voice. I know what I'll find and he’ll call me evil, but I want to make him suffer, if only a little bit.

  "Hmm," finally I respond, I trace over the swell of my breast along the center dip in my bikini top. This suit does happen to be my most revealing, and I generally only wear it when he and I are alone. It covers very little of my body and always managed to land me in a position where I was left panting and completely satisfied.

  "Should we talk about last night?" I look away from the water, feeling surprised by the topic of conversation. "Do you remember last night?"

  I know what parts he is referring to, and honestly, I'd be okay if we chose to ignore it completely. "I do," feeling less seductive than a moment ago, I hold his gaze, wondering where this will go from here.

  "Is there anything you think we need to discuss?"

  I shake my head, still holding his stare.

  "No questions?"

  Again I give my head a little shake. He seems surprised by my reaction. "So tomorrow or even next week, I won't find you staring off into nowhere with your mind rolling over all these crazy notions you've imagined in your head?"

  "Nope," I make a popping sound with the p, which makes him smile.

  "Hmm," again he seems surprised.

  "And do you want to know why?" I saunter toward him, feeling my bravery return. It is his turn to nod. "Because I know you could have never been truly happy with her."

  "Yeah," with his free hand, he reaches out and hooks my waist, pulling me in closer to his body. His skin is so warm from the sun. "True, but I'm interested now in what made you finally realize that."

  Jonah is by far the sexiest and most appealing man I have ever seen. But it isn't just because of his looks or his body. He is so kind and gentle, so attentive toward me he has this incredible way of making me feel like I'm the center of his world. "You would have been entirely too focused on fixing her teeth." I smile, and he tilts his head back immediately and chuckles. "Tell me I'm wrong? I mean, Heather is beautiful, and she seems sweet enough, but you are a teeth guy, and you can't help yourself, it's what you notice."

  "Maybe a little true," Jonah moves in closer, and his lips skim over mine immediately, making my skin break out with tiny goosebumps. He doesn't kiss me before pulling back. "But I think the real reason is that she's not you."

  "Always a sweet talker," I whisper just before he presses his lips to mine and allows his palm to move a little lower to cup my ass. When he groans and pushes his growing erection forward, I feel just how hard he is against my stomach.

  "Though I want to take this little bikini off your perfect body and lay you out on the lounger while I feast on you for hours, I can't."

  "Mm," I coo, imagining just what he described, "it sounds like the perfect way to spend an afternoon."

  "It does," again he kisses me, sucking on my tongue and then tugging on my lip. "But my sister and Tucker are on their way over for dinner and to watch the game." My eyes widen as I remember what I'm wearing. "Exactly, so you need to go change but leave this out and available, because tonight you and I have a date in the pool or hot tub, either is good with me." He winks, and as I step back and turn, he slaps my ass. I yelp and start to counter, but then I hear the sound of the doorbell echoing through the house, and I know I need to put some clothes on and fast.

  Chapter Forty-Five

  Jonah

  "You look happy," Avery leans into my side and whispers. We were all sitting outside on the back patio, the lights around the pool lighting the space perfectly. The game plays on the flat-screen just beneath the covered awning. Danielle's head rests on my shoulders. Her body tucked in close at my side. She'd fallen asleep long ago, and I remain perfectly still, not wanting to wake her.

  I love when she curls up with me, holding on to me in her sleep like she needs the security of knowing I'm there to sleep peacefully.

  "I am," I finally confess. More than happy; I've never been this content. My life has been good, my friends and family, it's all been great. Before Danielle, I thought I had it all, but I was wrong. She's the most magical part. She is my purpose. I've never loved so intensely, never craved so uncontrollably. She is my everything.

  "I see what you see in her," Avery adds, and I finally look away from the TV to find my sister lookin
g at me. "I'll admit before when you shared with me how things were between you two, I wasn't a big fan. I wanted you to find happiness with Heather or anyone because this girl Dani didn't deserve my big brother. She was the girl who took advantage of his kindness and his need to forgive and forget. I hated seeing you so torn up over a woman who wasn't smart enough to figure out what a catch you are, but I was wrong. I'll admit it."

  Avery looks from me to Dani and then back to me again. "She loves you, Jonah, and I'm not just talking about an infatuation. I'm talking about an all consuming love that you are still the greatest man in her life kind of love, no matter what. Last night, when Heather walked up and introduced herself to Dani, I half expected her to be all catty and bitchy, but she wasn't. Instead, she looked Heather in the eyes and said it was nice to meet her. Even when Heather decided to try talking about you like she knew you more than Dani did, I think I got angrier than Dani. Heather was trying to push Dani's button, which seems surprising because I didn't think Heather had that side to her, but I was wrong. I was about to go to your rescue, but Dani once again amazed me."

  "How?" My chest felt tight just thinking of Heather attempting to intimidate Dani, and I know right then and there all communication with Heather is off. No one does that shit to my girl.

  "Dani looked at her and told her she was in love with you the first night she saw you, and no man has ever made her feel so loved and so protected. She put Heather in her place without actually being a bitch about it." I hug Dani to me a little tighter. "She's incredible, Jonah, honestly."

  "I know," I've never met anyone like her in my life.

  "So what's next?" I know what my sister is asking, and I've thought of it often. I've pictured our lives and where I want to be in five years. I've imagined our kids. I've dreamed of it all.

  "I'm going to love her," I confess, feeling my heart swell. "I'm going to make her happier than she's ever been, and if you're asking me if I plan on marrying this woman, then my answer is yes, I do. I love her, Av, so much that the idea of losing her makes me feel hollow. She's who I want; she's my dream."

  Silence falls over us as I hold Dani in my arms, my lips resting on the top of her head. Tucker fully invested in the plays and was utterly oblivious to everything else but the game on the screen. But for me, all I can concentrate on is Dani. Every breath she takes, the way each exhale tickles my chest, and her hair blowing in the soft breeze that filters through the patio; she is all I can see.

  These are the moments I want to fill my life with, sharing a quiet moment with the woman who holds my heart in the palm of her hand—holding her and kissing her until we fall asleep.

  "I can't believe that ending play," Tucker groans, still irritated that his team lost. Stepping inside through the back door, music playing through the surround sound speakers.

  In the kitchen, Avery and Danielle move around the space, cleaning up from dinner. They are talking and laughing, and Tucker, still complaining about the game, fades away. All I can see is how happy Dani is.

  I realize my happiness comes from her happiness.

  She looks up from drying a plate to find me watching her, and she winks. It's a simple response but one I feel throughout my entire body.

  I recognize the song playing, and she too, must remember the last time it played when we were together because she bites her lip and again locks her eyes with mine. I glance down at the living room rug in front of the fireplace. I can almost picture her laying there, naked and begging me for more. My body reacts immediately, and I know now is not the time, so I fight the desire I feel for her.

  We make our way to the kitchen, and I step up behind Dani to lean in over her shoulder and kiss her cheek. "Need help?"

  "No," she says looking back at me, I take the opportunity to kiss her lips but only for a few seconds. I love my sister and Tuck, but honestly, I'm ready to be alone with Dani. "We've got it but thank you."

  I don't leave, and I slowly start to sway behind her as I hold onto her hips. She gives no resistance and leans back closer to me, letting her head fall to my shoulder. "I thought we could skip the pool," I talk low near her ear so only she can hear. "Maybe we could roll around in front of the fireplace instead." She bites her lip. "That song made me think of how you look on your hands and knees, looking back at me over your shoulder." I have to stop there because, again, I'm growing hard.

  "I'm good with that."

  Nipping at the side of her neck, I wait for the rush of lust to pass because if I move now, there is no way to hide how my body reacts to Dani's.

  The music on the radio changes to a more upbeat song. Tucker starts to dance with Avery, and the sound of her laughter fills the kitchen. I take it as my cue to turn Dani around and grab her hands. She, too, laughs, her head thrown back, the sounds only driving me more.

  I spin her and pull her back to me as I move against her, and she presses one hand to my chest. I'm so incredibly in love with Dani, but when she looks at me with such happiness in her eyes, I fall just a little more.

  I end the song by dipping her backward, and I look up to find Avery smiling at me knowingly. She gets it, she sees, she understands the depth of my love. She feels the same things for Tucker, and at that moment, I know the two of us are going to be okay without a doubt. We've watched our parents only love each other stronger and deeper every year. We were raised never to let those around us feel like they weren't the most important people in our world. Our parents never hid from us how truly in love they are and have always been.

  Avery and I have found that kind of love. We've found the people we can dance in the rain with, or this case, my kitchen. We've found our true loves.

  Chapter Forty-Six

  Danielle

  I pause, staring back at Tony, unsure of where I should go from here. I'd just exited Starbucks with a tray of coffees balancing in one hand. Tony stood with two other men, all wearing suits as one held open the door for me and allowed me to pass.

  I notice how uncomfortable he is, and I also know things are a bit rocky between him and Jonah, which I hate. The two of them are like brothers, and it breaks my heart to know I'm the one who has driven a wedge between them. Not to mention he’s dating my best friend.

  "Hey," he finally says, and I smile, unsure what to say. He tells the other men he'll catch up in a few minutes, and I step to the side and he follows. "Couldn't decide what to get, so you figured you'd get one of everything?" He motions to the five coffees I'm balancing in two hands.

  "No, I'm actually on my way to surprise Avery and Henry before I visit Jonah and Betty."

  "Nice," he nods and shifts his weight from one foot to the other.

  "Listen," we both say at the same time, and then I laugh. We were both a little out of our depths here.

  "I'm sorry," he doesn't wait for me to try again. Instead, he takes the lead, and I let him. "It was never any of my business; Jonah was right."

  "It was your business," he seems surprised. "If things were different and it was you doing what I'd done to Jonah to Addison, you better bet I would have had something to say. We love them, and protecting them comes alongside that love."

  He nods, and I notice the way his throat bobs as if he swallows hard, and I see the emotions in his eyes. "How is Jonah?"

  "Why don't you call him, maybe meet for a beer or something?"

  "Nah, I just—"

  "Tony," he looks up, and seeing a full-grown man with tears in his eyes is never something easy to swallow. "He misses you too."

  Again he nods, and I know this is hard for him. Guys don't get emotional, especially guys like Tony and Jonah. They are stubborn and pigheaded, but this rift between them is complex. I know I'm at the root, and I know sometimes it's easy to get lost in the drama, and then you're unable to find your way back.

  "Reach out," he nods. "This can all be fixed. You two have too many years and too many memories to let something like this come between you."

  "I was an ass to you," he confesses.

>   "You were," he smiles, and I laugh. "But again, I understand, he's your brother, and you love him. You thought you were protecting him," he looks down at the ground, and I notice how he is taking in one slow deep breath after the other. "I love him, Tony," he looks up, and his eyes are reddened and glossy. "It's what scared me so much because I knew if things didn't work out with Jonah, I'd be worse off than the day Matthew left me at the altar. Truth is what I feel for Jonah; it's so much more than love. I hurt him; I know that. Every day, I do my very best to make up for all those wrong choices I made. We're good, but there's an emptiness there too, and I know it's because he doesn't have his brother."

  He can't speak, but he doesn't have to, I understand.

  Stepping in, I offer him a one-arm hug, and he whispers a thank you. As I walk away, I decide that I won't say anything about this to Jonah, at least not now. I'd wait until we were alone.

  I intended my first stop to be to Avery and Henry, but as I pulled up in front of the dental office, I saw Jonah holding open the door for a young kid and his mother. He looks up to find me climbing out of my car, balancing a tray of coffees, and comes rushing toward me. "What's all this?"

  "Treats," he kisses the corner of my mouth before taking the tray of four coffees and leaving me to hold my single mocha. "I thought I'd surprise you and Betty and your sister and dad."

  "Babe, they already love you. It's not necessary to bribe them."

  "Haha," I poke him in the side, and he can't move away too quickly without dropping the drinks, so he has to endure the torture.

  "Okay, damn," he laughs. "Let's drop off Betty’s, and then I'll walk next door with you."

  "Slow day?"