by Maya Banks
"I think he might be cheating, or that's what I'm afraid of." Her shoulders slumped and she looked like a deflated balloon. "That came out wrong. I don't think he's cheating, but I think he's no longer interested in me."
"Okay, but you said you think he might be cheating," Julie said gently.
"It's a fear, but honestly, I don't see him as the type. He's just too blunt. I don't think he'd stay with me if he was seeing another woman."
"But you think he'd stay if he wasn't interested in you?"
Faith flushed. "Yeah, it sounds pretty stupid, I know."
"Why on earth would you think any of it? Faith, have you ever seen the way he looks at you? I'm not defending him, okay? I just wonder why you've arrived at these conclusions. Is it your own insecurities, or has he given you a solid reason for believing them?"
"Why do you have to be so damn levelheaded?" Faith grumbled.
Julie reached out and impulsively hugged her. "I'm sorry. You're right, you know. My job is to say what a bastard he is and to offer you my unconditional support. We're supposed to go get loaded on ice cream followed by copious amounts of alcohol."
Faith offered a tremulous smile. "No, your job is to keep me real and make sure I don't screw up the best thing in my life with my ridiculous anxieties."
Julie squeezed her hand. "Now for the obnoxious questions. What makes you think he's lost interest in you, and why aren't you talking to him about this? How did he take you calling off the wedding?"
"I'm a total coward. I'm afraid I used up my allotment of courage when I decided to own my sexuality and go after what I wanted," she said with a sigh. "I didn't exactly tell him I was calling things off. He found out this morning and stomped into my office. In front of all the others."
Julie cringed in sympathy. "Ouch."
Faith's brow wrinkled in confusion. "He seemed so . . . hurt."
"Why don't you lie back down and let me give you your massage. You can tell me all about it and you'll feel the magic of my fingers."
She held up her hands and waggled her fingers enticingly. Faith looked down at the table.
"I'd rather not. My boobs aren't taking it well. Maybe I'm just PMSing or something."
Julie frowned. "What do you mean, are they sore or what?"
"I'm just off," Faith said tiredly. "I'm not myself, and I shouldn't be making major life decisions when I'm missing a few brain cells, you know?"
Julie slid onto the table beside Faith and let her legs dangle as she glanced sideways at her friend. She took Faith's hand in hers and squeezed. "This is more than getting your period, Faith. I've seen you PMSing, and please. It's like Miss Sunshine stubs a toe or something. You're disgustingly cheerful even then. So tell me what's going on."
"I'm just tired and yucky feeling. My boobs hurt, and I can't stand my office in the mornings. The smell of coffee makes me want to puke."
"Oh shit."
Faith turned sharply. "What?"
"Uhm, Faith, honey, you know I love you but even you can't be this dense."
"Stop insulting me and tell me what the hell you're talking about."
"When was your last period?"
Faith's brows scrunched up in concentration. "Well, crap, I don't know."
"I think you ought to be at the drugstore buying an EPT instead of canceling your marriage plans."
"But I'm on birth control. I mean, I've been on it for a long time."
The panic in her voice made Julie wrap an arm around her and squeeze. "Is it the end of the world if you are?"
Tears welled in Faiths eyes. "It is if Gray's already tired of me."
"Is the only reason you think this because he's been late getting home from work?"
Faith shook her head. "It's been every night. And Julie, the other guys live in the same apartment complex. They're all getting home on time, and I talk to Pop several times a week. He's not working late. And when Gray gets home ... he's just so tired. He hasn't been interested . .."
"In sex?" Julie prompted.
"Yeah," Faith said in a quiet voice. "Me, sex. He comes home, he eats, he takes a shower, we go to bed. All of this before we're even married. I hate to think how it will be once we've tied the knot and become an old married couple."
"Hmm, yeah, I understand your point. I don't blame you for being worried, but you've got a lot to consider here. One, you might be pregnant and it's been my experience—not personal, mind you—that pregnancy hormones turn normal women into raving bitches. Two, these hormones might be making you a tad oversensitive. Three, there might be a perfectly reasonable explanation for Gray's behavior. You won't know until you talk to him. Preferably after you've taken that EPT test."
Faith gave her a watery smile then threw her arms around her, hugging her tight. "You're right, you know. You always are, Julie. I swear I don't know what I'd do without you to keep me grounded."
"You mean I'm a total bitch and you appreciate me for it," Julie said dryly.
Faith pressed her lips to Julie's cheek and smacked noisily. "You're the best bitch I know."
"But you can't go in there!"
Both women jerked their heads toward the door just as it thrust open and Nathan strode in, Julie's new massage therapist running behind him, her hair flapping like a flag.
Nathan skidded to a halt as he spied Faith, and his mouth snapped shut. A dull flush reddened his cheeks, and he hastily backed up a step.
'Ah hell. I didn't know you were here. I mean, I thought you were home."
Julie raised a brow and followed the direction of his gaze to where Faith's robe had gaped open at her breasts. She reached over and pulled it shut, which caused Nathan to look upward at the ceiling and Faith to grab both lapels with clenched fists.
"You wanted something?" Julie drawled.
Nathan redirected his gaze to Julie, his green eyes glittering with determination. "Hell, yeah, I want something. I want you to stop avoiding me."
He turned back to Faith, who was now decent. His eyes softened when he saw the evidence of her upset. Faith did have that kicked-puppy look going on. A guy would have to be made of stone not to go all gooey around her. But what surprised Julie was that his gaze kept going back to her, and when it did, he positively sizzled.
Very interesting, indeed.
"Faith, are you okay, honey?"
Faith smiled and kept a tight grip on her robe.
"I didn't mean to barge in. Okay, I did, but I had no idea you were here. I thought you'd gone home. Hell, that's where Gray went. . ."
Both women arched an eyebrow at that.
"Gives you time to get to the drugstore," Julie murmured. "You can come back here and pee on your stick in my bathroom."
"Yeah, uhm, I think I'll do that," Faith said as she hopped down from the table. "Give you two time to do whatever it is you're going to do."
As she moved past Nathan, he reached out to cup her elbow. "Faith, are you okay?"
She smiled and reached up on tiptoe to kiss his cheek. "I will be. Don't blow it this time, okay?"
He grimaced and looked beyond her to Julie as Faith left the room. With determination etched into every one of his features, he advanced toward her.
Julie swallowed, suddenly feeling like a very big fish in a very small bowl.
"Now that we're finally alone, you're going to listen to what I have to say," he said softly.
Chapter 10
Nathan leaned forward, placing his hands on either side of Julie's hips, trapping her where she sat on the massage table. Damn but the man smelled good. She actually found herself leaning more into him, her nose precariously close to the part of his shirt that was unbuttoned at the neck.
"So, uhm, what was it you wanted to say?" she asked casually.
"Date."
She raised an eyebrow in question.
"You. Me. Date. Go to dinner. Have a normal conversation. Preferably one where you'll sit through the entire meal, and I don't have to chase you down."
Her lips twitched as s
he battled a smile.
"A date, huh."
He nodded. "As of now, you've never given me a massage. Whatever happened in the past stays there and that includes any misunderstandings that went on in your head."
"Does that caveman approach work on all the girls?" she asked.
He blinked in confusion then stood back, running a hand over his head. "Damn it, Julie, what do you want from me? For some reason known only to you, you've decided to drive me around the bend."
"And you haven't driven me nuts over the past few months?" she asked incredulously. "I mean, come on, Nathan. What's a woman have to do?"
He closed his eyes and blew out his breath. She could swear his lips were moving in an effort to count to ten. She almost laughed out loud. Maybe she wasn't the only frustrated one here.
He moved back in, crowding her, stepping between her legs so that his heat and delicious scent enveloped her. He cupped her face in his hands and stared down at her, sincerity burning in his eyes.
"Look, can we just start over? Please? My name is Nathan Tucker and I'd love to take you out sometime. Preferably tonight. If you're available, that is."
Her eyes widened in surprise and then she smiled. "Okay, Nathan Tucker. I'd love to go out. Tonight is fine."
He looked suspiciously at her. "Really? Just like that?"
She nodded, pressing her lips together to keep from laughing. "Amazing what happens when you just ask, isn't it?"
"I could say the same for you," he said darkly.
Before she could respond, he leaned down and took her mouth. There was no other term for it. It wasn't a gentle kiss from someone who was unsure of his reception. It was a kiss from a man starved.
"Mmmm."
It was all she could muster as he devoured her lips. Warm and soft, his tongue delved into her mouth, sliding over her tongue, over and under and over again. He tasted every bit as good as he smelled.
He crowded in closer until she was at an angle, her face turned up to his. She put her hands down on the table to brace herself as he towered over her. Damn but the man could kiss.
When he pulled away, his breathing was ragged, and his eyes were glazed with passion. He looked totally and utterly flustered, and he didn't try to hide it behind a Mr. Cool veneer.
He fished in his pocket and pulled out a crumpled piece of paper and thrust it toward her. "Give me your number. I'll pick you up at seven, if that's okay."
She took the piece of paper then slid off the table, bumping against him when her feet hit the floor. He didn't back away, and for a moment she stood there, her breasts brushing against his chest. Part of her wanted to kiss him again. Hell, she wanted to throw him down on the table and have her wicked way with him, but he was going to have to work for it this time.
She sidestepped him and walked over to where a pen lay on the counter. With a hasty scribble, she wrote down her number, then walked back over to hand it to him.
"No changing your mind," he said.
It was probably meant to be a threat or an order, but it came out more as a request, a fact she found endearing. It was interesting to see this man at a disadvantage, unsure of himself.
"You be there at seven and I'll be ready," she said.
He looked like he wanted to kiss her again. He even swayed slightly in her direction. Then as if deciding against it, he turned and stalked out the way he'd come in. At the door he paused and turned around.
"I'll see you tonight."
She smiled and nodded.
As soon as he disappeared, she balled up her fist, raised her arm and pumped her elbow down in a victory exclamation.
Score one for her. Finally.
This whole owning her sexuality, going for what she wanted thing wasn't a bad idea after all. If she hadn't gone after Nathan, no matter how disastrous it had been, she wouldn't have gotten fed up and gone to Damon, which had resulted in a mind-blowing sexual fantasy come true. Now she had fantastic sex on one hand and Nathan Tucker finally coming to heel on the other.
Not bad for a day's work. Not bad at all.
Faith skulked down the aisles of the drugstore like a teenage girl after a pregnancy scare. Chastising herself for remotely caring if anyone saw her buying a damn pregnancy test, she snagged the first one she saw and turned it over to read the back.
Then she realized she'd picked up an ovulation predictor kit. With a sigh, she bent down and focused on the boxes. Her head wasn't screwed on right today. She kept remembering how Gray had looked when he'd stalked into her office.
Surely a guy who'd lost interest wouldn't look so . . . hurt. Angry. Yes, he'd been angry too, but those blue eyes she loved so much had also yielded worry and pain.
What a mess she'd made. Calling off the wedding had been an impulsive action brought on by the desire to react. A reaction to her panic and stupid hysteria. She'd love to blame it on pregnancy hormones but that would mean she was pregnant, and she didn't really need that right now.
No, she was just stupid and now she'd probably ruined everything with Gray.
She snagged the box that promised the earliest results and headed for the cashier. Thank goodness she was only minutes away from Julie's. She could use Julie's bathroom and then cry on her shoulder if necessary.
When she entered Julie's salon, Julie met her at the door and herded her back to the massage room.
"Got it?" Julie asked.
Faith held up the bag and sighed. "I'm being ridiculous, but I appreciate you letting me."
Julie smiled. "What are friends for? If they won't let you be irrational twits, who will?"
For a moment, Faith sat there, the bag crumpled in her sweaty hand. Then she looked up at Julie and shook her head. "I'm being a coward. I might as well get this over with."
"Take your time, honey. I've got no appointments."
Suddenly remembering that when she'd left Nathan had been here and now he was gone, Faith yanked her gaze back up to Julie.
"What happened with Nathan anyway? Did you toss him out?"
Julie grinned. "No, he asked me to dinner and I accepted."
"Come on, is that all?" Faith sputtered. "Details. I know I'm missing some details."
"Okay, so he kissed me senseless then asked me to dinner."
"And you said . . . ?"
"Yes, of course."
Faith sighed in relief. She loved Nathan to pieces, and as clueless as he was, he still deserved a chance.
She almost swallowed her tongue as she realized that she was hoping for Nathan what she was unwilling to grant Gray—a chance to explain himself.
Hysterical ninny. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
"I need to get out of here," she mumbled as she stood. "I should be home, talking to Gray."
"I agree."
Faith whirled around to see Gray standing in the doorway staring at her and Julie, those blue eyes burning. She clutched the brown bag to her chest and stood there trembling, all her courage deserting her in a wimpy rush.
Gray took a step forward, then another, until he stood just a foot away, so close she could almost feel him touching her.
"What's going on, baby?" he asked in a soft, worried voice.
Her grip was so tight on the bag that her fingers were bloodless, pale tips. He reached out and carefully tugged it away from her. Oh no . . .
He unrolled the top and peered into it, going completely still. She couldn't even see him breathe. Then he looked back up at her. Only the betraying shake of the bag told her its affect on him.
"Don't you think we should go home and do this together?"
Her chin trembled, and she fought back tears. He was precisely right. This was something they should be doing together, facing it together.
Silently, he reached for her hand, palm up, just waiting for her to take it. Closing her eyes, she extended her arm, allowing her palm to slide over his.
As he pulled her forward, she turned to Julie. "Thanks, Julie. I'll see you later, okay?"
Julie smiled. "Take car
e, hon. And let me know, okay?"
Faith nodded and allowed Gray to lead her outside to his truck.
"My car," she protested when he opened the passenger door.
"We can get it later. Right now I want you with me."
He paused briefly to run his fingers down the side of her cheek, pushing aside the hair gathered there.
"Get in, Faith. There's something I want to show you before we go home."
Chapter 11
Realizing there wasn't much time for her to get home and get ready for her date, Julie left on the heels of Faith and Gray. It had certainly been an interesting day. The only thing that would make it more interesting would be if Serena showed up because she was dumping Damon or had finally accepted his proposal.
Relationships were quite simply a giant pain in the ass. Too much drama. They were laden with misunderstanding. No one ever communicated worth a shit as evidenced by Faith's departure from the common sense she usually possessed.
Good sex should be the ultimate goal. Anything else was just icing, and, well, too much sugar was never a good thing.
Julie drove to her apartment, tapping her nails on her steering wheel the entire way. This was the time where she was probably supposed to be bemoaning the fact that all her friends were in relationships and happy as clams and here she was, still single. She was supposed to be envious and lacking, right?
Only, at the moment she felt fortunate to be financially secure, to not be an emotional wreck and, God forbid, have a pregnancy scare. Not that she didn't think Faith would be a terrific mother and adjust to the situation in record time, but the idea still sent a shudder down Julie's spine.
Maybe one day? But not anytime soon. No, she had no desire to settle down and breed a bunch of peeing, puking, burping, crying little munchkins.
It was six by the time she parked in her spot. Not that it took her eons to get ready, but she wanted to look damn good tonight. After all the entire point was to let Nathan Tucker know what he was missing.