The Temple at Landfall

by Jane Fletcher

  Gina sat back and considered her for a while. “Now I admit, I didn’t expect you to shout ‘whoopee,’ charge out the door, and fling yourself on the first woman you met, but I did expect a bit more of a reaction from you.”

  “Well... partly, what you say, I’ve half suspected myself, though I wasn’t completely certain.” Lynn’s voice was flat.

  “Oh, I’m not completely certain. Peter McKay wasn’t a geneticist. There may be some valid reasons for Himoti’s standpoint that he wasn’t aware of. But I’d say it wasn’t an unreasonable risk to take. If you wanted to.”

  Lynn took a deep breath and sighed. “That’s the other part. Wanting. There’s only...” Her voice died and her eyes squeezed shut in an agonized grimace.

  “Kim,” Gina suggested quietly.

  Lynn needed several more strained breaths before she could go on. “I’m that obvious?”

  “About as obvious as she is over you.”

  Lynn shook her head in denial. “She doesn’t want me.”

  “How do you know?”

  “She told me so.”

  “Did she, now?” Gina said in mock surprise. “Well, I wouldn’t pay any attention to that. If I were you, I’d take her somewhere private and have a few words with her.”

  “Oh no,” Lynn said swiftly. “Not after the last time I did that, in the stable.” Her head sank even lower. “You heard about what they did to her?”

  “The flogging?”

  Lynn nodded. “Sister Dunsin made me watch. It was...” Lynn stopped, hunting for words. “It was awful and it was all my fault. And Kim...it’s not surprising if she doesn’t want anything to do with me. Sometimes I’m amazed she is even willing to wish me a good morning.” Lynn buried her face in her hands.

  Gina shifted over and put an arm around Lynn’s shoulders. “I’m probably not the best person to get advice from. I came to the whole game a bit late in life myself. But I think it’s like imprinting. You need to follow your heart.”

  Lynn nodded and slowly got to her feet. “I don’t know. It’s...”

  “It’s probably best if I mind my own business,” Gina said in self-mockery. “I’m sure the pair of you will sort things out in the end.”

  “What’s the point in having a leader who minds her own business?” The corner of Lynn’s mouth twitched in a sad smile. “And I’m not sure if there’s anything to sort out, but thanks for trying to help.” She turned and left the room, leaving Gina still sitting, looking in despair at the closed door.

  Chapter Twenty-Two—The Festival of the Firstborn

  The eleventh of August was the festival of the firstborn. At the temple in Landfall, the occasion would have been marked with great solemnity. The Sisters would have spent the day in fasting and prayer, and the Chief Consultant herself would have read to the assembled faithful from the book of the Elder-Ones. Streams of worshipers would have entered the temple to lay offerings at the various shrines, amid sweet, thick clouds of incense.

  At Westernfort, the heretics decided to hold a party. They might not have seen the birth of the first children on the planet as an act of divine benevolence, but they did concede that it was an important historical date, and by the following year, they would have their own firstborn to celebrate.

  The day was hot and sticky, an added incentive to quit the fields early, so that by midafternoon all work in the valley had ceased, except for the heroic chefs who braved the heat of the cooking fires to prepare food. By the time the sun was dropping behind the mountains, groups of women were congregating all around the village square, laughing and shouting to their friends. In one corner, a band with pipes and drums were engaged in a last practice before their skills would be called on to entertain their comrades.

  Lynn sat with the players, adding her clear voice to their music. At the prompting of a couple of the Rangers, she even sang a few of the traditional hymns for the day, songs in praise of Celaeno. Some heretics frowned disapprovingly, but Gina only looked at her from the far side of the square, smiling and shaking her head. It was not a day to get dogmatic.

  The light began to fade and a gentle evening breeze eased the temperature toward more bearable levels, enough for dancing to become an attractive idea. Soon the glow from the burning torches around the square fell on rows of couples, swirling in time to the music. Pots and baskets of food were set out on blankets at one side, drawing lines, and flagons of beer were passed from woman to woman.

  When her singing was not required, Lynn wandered around the edge of the gathering, entranced. The scene called back memories of her childhood: the village celebrations, scuffling with her friends, eating honey cakes, and watching her parents dancing in the moonlight. She looked up. The sky was turning deepest blue, and the shining orb of Hardie hung overhead, a full moon, like a sign of blessing upon the exuberant revelers. Lynn was struck by the thought that there was more true gratitude for the gifts they had received in the wild cavorting before her than in all the ceremonies at the temple. The goddess who did not prefer the heretics’ celebration of life to the Sisters’ dead chants was not worth worshipping.

  However, Lynn’s pleasure in the party was not unqualified. She was not sure if she was avoiding Kim, or if Kim was avoiding her, but they always managed to be where the other one was not. An awareness started to nag at her, that a loosely defined and variable part of the square was out of bounds, and a worry that she would be the one to make a false step and cause an embarrassing encounter. Singing became a refuge, since her position was fixed at the front of the band, and it was therefore Kim’s responsibility to maintain her distance.

  By the time true dark had fallen, the strain had begun to tell, and the smile on Lynn’s face was forced. Her dejection was not helped by the increasingly common sight of couples kissing in the shadows that thickened around the edges of the square. Singing would not provide an escape for much longer. Her voice was starting to fail, and the music was progressing to more riotous tunes that were not suited to vocal accompaniment.

  Lynn felt as if a cloak of misery had wrapped itself around her, isolating her from the rest of the village. She was detached. A lone, pathetic observer on the sidelines.

  *

  Lynn never got near enough to Kim to see that she was also unhappy and taking only the most desultory part in the festivities, but others were watching them both and passing comments.

  Chip stood at the side of the square with Katryn, their arms around each other’s waist. They talked together quietly during a lull in the music, while their eyes moved between Kim and Lynn. At last, Chip gave her considered opinion. “I can’t stand watching them any longer.”

  “But what can you do?”

  “I’ll think of something.”

  “You’re more likely to put your foot in it,” Katryn warned, but her partner only grinned.

  “Of course. That’s what I do best.”

  Chip disentangled herself, but Katryn caught her hand before she could go. “I’m serious. You’re not going to get thanks from either of them if you make things worse.”

  “Can it get worse?”

  “Of course it can. Just think things through first.”

  The music began again. Chip tilted her head to one side. “I’ve thought.” She turned and walked off through the crowd, heading toward Lynn’s last spotted location. She found the Imprinter standing alone and well to the back of the audience. Lynn’s face held an expression of poorly concealed misery that changed to a half-hearted smile of greeting when she saw Chip approaching.

  “How are you doing?” the Ranger asked.

  “Okay,” Lynn replied, although her tone would have implied otherwise.

  “You’re not dancing.”

  “I don’t know how.”

  “What!”

  The surprise in Chip’s voice drew the first genuine smile from Lynn. “The last time I was at a party like this, I was eleven. I did dance with one of my friends, but I’m afraid it degenerated into a battle to stamp on each ot
her’s toes, and I’ve not had the chance to improve my technique since then. The Sisters don’t encourage dancing.”

  “Come on, then. There’s someone I want you to meet.”

  Chip did not allow any chance to protest. She slipped an arm through Lynn’s and dragged her off around the square. After the first couple of forced steps, Lynn came along willingly enough, although Chip suspected that she would rather have been left alone, and if she was hoping for something to distract her from brooding about Kim, she was going to be disappointed. The challenge would be to get Lynn to their destination before she knew where they were headed.

  To Chip’s satisfaction, the shadows and the interposing bodies did the trick. Triumphantly, she pulled Lynn to a stop in front of Kim and gave a mock bow. “Lynn, allow me to present Captain Ramon, who, I’m sure, will be more than happy to dance with you. She is without question the worst dancer in the whole squadron. So no matter how rusty your own skills might be, you can rest assured that you will have a partner who is in no position to offer criticism.”

  Chip had not been counting on immediate smiles and harmony, but the result fell short of her most pessimistic fears. For a few agonizing seconds, Kim and Lynn stared at each other, confusion becoming dismay, and in Kim’s case, anger.

  Her friend turned a furious face on Chip. “You can be a complete pain sometimes. If I’d wanted to dance with Lynn, I’d have asked her myself. I don’t need you dumping people on me.”

  Kim’s raised voice had heads swiveling in their direction. Lynn took a step back. Her words were blurted out. “I’m sorry. Please don’t think I put her up to this. I wouldn’t dream of imposing myself on you. I don’t...” Lynn’s voice choked, then she whirled around and dived off through the crowds.

  “No, Lynn, wait. I didn’t mean...” Kim called after her, presumably realizing too late how her angry words would have sounded, but Lynn kept going, her pace not slacking as she left the square and disappeared down the pathway between two of the surrounding buildings.

  “Look what you’ve done.” Kim turned on Chip again.

  “I’ve done!”

  “Yes, you.”

  “I merely suggested that the two of you might like to dance together. It was you who gave the impression you thought dancing with her had the general appeal of a shit sandwich.”

  Kim’s eyes fixed on the point where Lynn had vanished. “Oh...Himoti’s tits. What do I do now?”

  “How about going after her and explaining what you really meant?”

  “I can’t do that.”

  Chip fixed her friend with a long, hard stare. “You know, Kim, for a brave woman, you can be a hell of a coward sometimes.” Then she also turned and left the distraught Ranger captain alone.

  *

  The sounds of the party faded behind Lynn as she headed out of the village and up the hillside beyond, walking with no particular goal in mind, just a wish to find somewhere where she could cry in solitude. Soon the cultivated fields ended, and she reached the narrow band of rough pasture below the tree-covered upper slopes. By now, the music from the village was no more than a distant rumble. Water gurgled nearby. Lynn followed the gentle sound, still climbing, until she reached the banks of a small stream cascading down the hillside.

  The moonlight was bright enough to glitter on the spray and light the scene in silver-white and blue-black shadows. The air was soft and warm. A faint breeze stirred in the treetops and carried the rich scents of the firs. Lynn stopped walking at the point where the forest began and leaned her back against the trunk of a tree, watching the leaping stream and giving herself over to grief. Yet despite her expectation, tears did not come, just a numbing wave of hopelessness. For a while, she stood listening to the senseless babbling of the water, then she heard another sound, the rustle of someone approaching, following her trail through the knee-high grass.

  “Lynn?” The voice was Kim’s.

  Lynn hesitated. What she most wanted to do was hide, but it was hardly an adult way to behave. She forced herself to answer. “I’m here.”

  Lynn folded her arms in front of herself, waiting defensively, as Kim joined her beside the stream, although the Ranger elected to maintain a few meters distance between them.

  “Lynn? Are you all right?”

  “Oh, of course,” Lynn joked with mirthless irony.

  “I...I wanted to say I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that I didn’t want to dance with you. I was just angry at Chip for playing the fool.”

  “That’s okay.”

  Seconds passed while Kim stood watching her uncertainly. “Will you come back to the village with me?”

  “No,” Lynn said sharply, but then relented at little and added, “No. You go back. I’ll be fine.”

  “I can’t just leave you alone here.”

  Lynn could not force out an answer. She raised one hand to cover her eyes as a dry sob shook her body.

  Kim took a few steps forward until she was within arm’s reach. “Lynn. What’s wrong?”

  “You told me we could be friends.” Lynn’s voice was raw with pain.

  “Aren’t we?”

  “This is the most we’ve spoken together for weeks.” Lynn’s hand dropped from her face and she stared, unseeing, at the ground in front of her feet.

  “I...Yes, well...I’m sorry. I’ve been busy and...” Kim’s disordered mumbling died.

  “It seems more like you’ve been avoiding me.”

  “It’s not that I don’t want to be your friend.”

  “Simply that you don’t like being anywhere near me?” Lynn suggested bitterly.

  “No!”

  “It’s all right if you don’t want anything to do with me. You don’t have to pretend.”

  “It’s not that, Lynn. Honestly it’s not.” Kim sounded desperate. She lifted her hand to touch Lynn’s arm, but then let it fall, the gesture unfinished. “If you want to see more of me, I’ll make time for you. I promise. I’ll do whatever you want. Anything.”

  Lynn’s face twisted in a grimace. “You should be more careful about what you promise.”

  “I mean it.”

  “Do you?”

  “Yes.”

  “Because at the moment, I really desperately want to kiss you again.” Lynn did not dare to look up, dreading to see either anger or dismay on Kim’s face.

  The silence dragged on until Kim said quietly, “You’re an Imprinter.”

  “So?”

  “You have to be celibate.”

  “Gina thinks that’s just a superstition the Sisters made up.”

  “And what do you think?”

  “I don’t know. I don’t care. I love you.” Lynn’s eyes were fixed on the ground. “But I guess it’s my problem. I’m sure I’ll get over it in the end. You don’t have to feel responsible or anything, and if you say good night and rush away, I’ll understand.”

  Deliberately, Kim stepped forward to stand in front of Lynn, blocking her field of vision; then both of Kim’s hands moved to rest on Lynn’s shoulders, holding her gently but firmly. For a while neither moved, but at last Lynn raised her chin so their eyes met.

  “Why would I want to rush away?” Kim asked softly.

  “Because of what happened last time. You’ve got every right to want to avoid me. I didn’t give you a chance back in Petersmine. It wasn’t what you wanted, but I threw myself at you, and you suffered for it.”

  “Do you think I don’t know how to sidestep if a woman throws herself at me and I don’t want to catch her?” Kim paused. “I love you too. I fell in love with you at the mountain fort, and I still love you. I wanted you in the stable and I want you now.”

  “But you said...”

  Lynn did not get to finish her sentence. Kim’s hands slipped behind her back, pulling her away from the tree, enfolding her. Lynn’s breath became ragged as she felt what it was like to be held by Kim again, and then to feel the firmness of Kim’s body filling her own arms. She gave herself totally to the embrace. Kim’s ch
eek pressed against her forehead, tilting her face back, and then Kim’s mouth met hers. The kiss claimed her entire being. Nothing else had ever been so real. Lynn could no longer feel the ground beneath her feet. She was adrift and floating, anchored only by the soft touch of Kim’s lips.

  By the time they broke from the kiss, they were both shaking. Lynn’s legs were weak, unable to support her, and her head was spinning. Kim looked at the ground, but it was Lynn who made the decision, sinking down and drawing Kim after her. The grass rustled beneath her and a few stray blades tickled her cheek, but then Kim was lying beside her and kissing her again and driving away all other awareness. The wandering kiss moved from Lynn’s mouth to her eyes and then down her neck to the base of her throat. Lynn lifted her hands, running her fingers over Kim’s back and through Kim’s hair.

  Kim tugged Lynn’s shirt free of her waistband. At the touch of Kim’s hand on her skin, Lynn gasped. The sound arrested Kim’s actions. She raised herself on one elbow and looked down at Lynn, her face showing her uncertainty.

  “Don’t stop,” Lynn said quickly.

  “Are you sure?”

  “I love you.”

  “But are you sure this is what you want?” Kim asked gently.

  “Of course I’m not sure, but I can’t bear not to.”

  Kim’s hand moved to the ties on Lynn’s shirt, loosening them one by one, until the two sides fell open, exposing Lynn’s bare skin to the warm night air. Again, Kim lowered her mouth, her tongue investigating the line of Lynn’s shoulder, and then further down. Her lips nuzzled Lynn’s breasts and finally opened around a nipple, sucking gently. A high-pitched sound, like the cry of a newborn puppy, escaped from the back of Lynn’s throat. She felt Kim’s tongue working on her ever more ardently. Lynn tugged on Kim’s clothing, attempting, without success, to pull her shirt off. Thankfully, Kim felt what she was trying to do and sat up. In a few deft movements, Kim had loosened the fastening at her neck, caught hold of the hem, and drawn it over her head.