She shakes her head. "This is fine. I just want to be out of this house."
"All yours," I say to Mathias.
"Hi Denise," he says. "I'm going to get my scythe out now and open the portal."
She nods, which I know he can see. It's strange to me that not all reapers have the same abilities, but I suppose it makes sense. People have different skills even if they have the same capabilities. It would be weird if we were all exactly the same.
Mathias pulls his scythe from his back. He places both hands on the shaft and spaces his feet apart to give himself a good centre of balance. The wood on his staff is a lighter colour than the ebony of mine, and the blade is shorter and fatter than mine. I don't think that's anything to do with function, as this seems to fit with the idea of Mathias in my head, just like my slimmer and thinner blade fits better with me.
I step back to ensure he has enough space to swing.
He brings his scythe in a powerful arc towards where Denise is standing. She doesn't even flinch as it flies towards her. Maybe she expects it. Then again, being dead probably makes her less worried about getting hurt. Something changes in the air, and even though I don't have the same abilities as he does, I can sense the world reforming around a path to the next realm.
The air shimmers, almost as if there's a heat haze. I'm guessing that's where the path to the next world is, even if I can't see it.
"Your path is ready for you, Denise," Mathias says softly. "Good luck on your journey."
The ghost doesn't say anything as she approaches the ripple. She reaches out with a pale finger and touches it. She fades away in front of my eyes, leaving the world far behind.
I'm not sure what I expected from a reaping, but it isn't the sense of peace settling around us. It's oddly beautiful.
The magic drains from the air, leaving nothing but the echo of a ghost.
"Is it like that every time?" I ask Mathias.
"Unless the ghost isn't ready to go, yes. But that's what we're here for. We're making sure they get the peace they need." He reattaches his scythe to the holder on his back with practised ease. I don't think I could manage it nearly so smoothly.
"It's beautiful."
"It is," he agrees. "And it doesn't stop being. I always get nervous when I'm swinging my scythe towards someone, but after, I know it's the right thing to do, and that helps."
"So, what do we do now? Do we have to wait for them?" I gesture towards the house, hoping he knows I mean the police.
"No, we've done our bit. Reapers and ghosts can't testify in trials, we can only point law enforcement in the right direction."
"Does that mean no paperwork?"
"Sadly not. We have plenty of that to do. But we can do it back at the academy."
"Do you think Juliet will be back in her room so we can get fancy coffee?"
He chuckles. "Already turned off the vending machine stuff?"
"A little," I admit.
"I don't know. But how about we go to one of the coffee shops down the road and get ourselves one to go before we head back to the academy. My treat."
"Do we get to have a brownie too?"
He grins. "Anything you want."
"That sounds perfect. Let's do that."
He holds out his arm for me and I slip my hand through, resting it on his sleeve. We head down the street towards the coffee shop, with all thoughts of the Shadow Association and what they might do to get me back almost completely gone.
Chapter Fourteen
I slip my key into the lock and twist, pushing the door open and leading Mathias into my room. A small part of me wonders whether this is a good idea. But the common room is full of people and I don't want to do paperwork with so many distractions going on. That's a recipe for disaster, especially the first time. I want to make sure I get this right. Especially as this is a good learning experience.
"Do you have the forms already?" I ask Mathias.
"We can download them on your laptop."
I bite my bottom lip. "I don't have one yet."
"Oh. Well I can go get mine. Here." He hands me his coffee and the bag containing my brownie and his blueberry muffin. "I'll be back in a moment." He hesitates for a moment as if he wants to lean in and kiss my cheek.
My heart flutters at the thought, but I get it back in check before anything happens.
I make my way into the room and set down the coffee and cake on my desk. I unstrap my scythe and pull it from my back, I hold it for a moment. It's heavy, but it sits easily in my hands. The head is intricately decorated, more so than I expected, but the smith said that's what the metal told him when he was shaping it. I'd never have asked for something so elaborate, but I have to admit it feels right to me. Which I suspect is part of the point.
I lift it into the hanging space next to the wardrobe. When I first moved into the room, I wondered what it was for, but thankfully, Juliet explained it to me.
I turn around and spot a piece of paper on the floor. I frown. Did I drop something when I came in? I don't think so, but that doesn't mean anything.
I lean down and pick it up only to almost drop it again when I spot the familiar seal on the back. What do they want now?
The letter mocks me even without knowing what it says. After the last one, I can't imagine it's going to be good.
And why is it in my room? The post doesn't come here, it goes to a central office for the whole academy and we get an email then have to go pick it up.
My whole body turns cold as the reality of what's happened sinks in.
Someone from the Shadow Association has been here. They may not have gotten inside my room, but they've been in the Sakura dorms. They're trying to send me a message, and it's working.
The door swings open, making me jump. I almost expect someone from the Association to come in and drag me away.
Relief crashes through me as Mathias steps inside.
"What happened?" he asks instantly, concern flashing over his face.
"Lock the door. Please?"
He does as I ask and places his closed laptop on the desk next to the coffees without a second thought. He sits on the bed beside me and puts his arm around me. I lean into him before I can think twice about how close we are. I'm surprised by how natural the move feels for us, but I like it all the same.
"Do you want to talk about it?" he asks.
"I found this." I gesture with the letter.
"What does it say?"
"I haven't opened it yet," I admit. "But someone slid it beneath my door."
"And you think it's from the Shadow Association?"
"It has their crest on it." I flip it open so he can see the circle with the S in the middle, complete with a shadow.
"Ah." He pauses, as if unsure about whether he can say whatever it is on his mind. "Do you want me to open it for you?"
A soft sigh escapes me. "No. I need to do it myself."
I pull my head away from his shoulder, but don't break our embrace. I don't want to lose the connection we've finally managed to make.
The soft rip of the envelope doesn't capture the stress of finding out what's inside. I unfold the paper and hold it so Mathias can read the words too. I could keep it to myself, but I know I'll only show it to him after anyway. I don't want to keep anything about the Shadow Association from him again. I want him to trust me, and the only way to do that is to show him that I trust him.
Syxe Weston,
Your presence is required tomorrow night at six for your Shadow Oath. If you do not attend, you will be collected from Scythe Grove Academy by any means possible. Do not disappoint us.
The Shadow Seer Association
A shiver runs down my spine.
"They've changed the date from the first letter," Mathias observes.
"I guess they expected me to come running back to them after it. How did they even get into the academy?"
"They probably had a reaper do it. There's nothing stopping them from finding this place, especiall
y if they've been before."
Tears sting my eyes as the realisation that my safe place isn't all that safe at all. At least there's a lock on my door.
"I don't want to go back," I whisper.
He takes the letter from me and sets it to the side before pulling me further into his arms.
"It's okay," he promises. "We'll figure it out."
"They're not going to stop. If I don't go, I'll put other people in danger." What if they decide to force more people to go with them? I'm not sure if they would do that, but clearly I don't know much about the Association I've apparently been a part of since I was a baby.
"What else can you do? We could get the Supernatural Retrieval Agency involved, but I'm not sure how much they can do about it. Most people don't even believe the Shadow Association is real," he muses.
"I'd hope supernatural law enforcement knows it's real," I mutter. If they don't, then the world is in a much worse state than I thought.
"We can try? They'd probably be able to put you into protective custody or something."
"Which will take me away from learning about who I am." I sigh. "I'm going to have to go tomorrow."
"Syxe..."
"It's the only way to put an end to this. If I go and refuse to take the oath, they can't do anything about it. I'll have turned out like they say I have to. But I'll deny everything so I don't get trapped."
"You can't go on your own. We can't trust that they'll let you leave."
I bite my lip and try not to cry. I don't normally break down easily. I've learned to deal with my emotions without them to avoid drawing too much attention to myself. But this is the rest of my life. Everything about it is terrifying in a way I don't want to dwell on too much.
"I'll go with you," he says.
I pull back so I can see his face properly. One look tells me all I need to know about his determination levels. He isn't going to take no for an answer, even if it's the one I have to give.
"No, you can't. It's too dangerous. They don't know who you are..."
"They probably do. Especially if they've been looking into you at the academy."
"That's not the point. If you turn up to the oath with me, they'll think you want to take it too. If I'm trapped in a cult, you can't be too. Your family has already lost one person to the Shadow Association."
His lips purse, but I can tell it isn't me he's annoyed at. "Joining was Stephanie's choice. I may not agree with it, but she made her decision as an adult. You didn't. You don't even remember joining the Association."
"I suppose that's true."
"I'm going with you, Syxe. I'm going to make sure you walk out of the door a free woman."
"That might not be possible."
"It definitely isn't if we don't try," he points out. "And if you're going to go, then I'm going with you. If you decide not to go, that's okay too. We'll figure it out no matter what you want to decide."
A small sob escapes me before I can stop it. I cover my mouth with my hand, hoping to stop more from escaping. "I'm sorry."
"You have nothing to be sorry for." He reaches out and brushes a strand of hair away from my face in a surprisingly intimate gesture. "You didn't ask for this."
"Neither did you."
"True. But that doesn't mean I'm not going to help you. We'll go tomorrow and we'll put a stop to this," he promises. "You have nothing to worry about."
A weak smile crosses over my face. I'm not sure if I believe him, but he'll help me try and that means the world to me. Hopefully, I won't get him too mixed up in my problems.
Though it might be too late for that.
Chapter Fifteen
I'm sick to my stomach as I approach the same door I've been going through for years. I don't want to go back inside, but I know I have to if I want to put an end to this.
Mathias reaches out and takes my hand in his, giving it a squeeze.
The contact helps me to relax, much to my own surprise. I'm not going to question why too much. For now, all that matters is that he's here and I don't have to do this alone.
I adjust my scythe, still not sure that bringing it is the right thing to do. What if they take it away from me?
I push the thought aside. They're not going to do that. The Association doesn't want to take away the fact I'm supernatural, they just want me to swear to live a secretive life. That's a small consolation, though still not great.
"You've got this," he assures me.
"I hope you're right."
I lead him up the steps and push on the front door. Out of habit, I start to take off my shoes but stop when I realise I don't live here and will be going to a different part of the building.
"Syxe. Good. You're here," Angela says, walking towards me with her arms outstretched.
I stand completely still as the woman responsible for the running of the house approaches me as if I'm a long lost friend and not someone who has been ignoring their letters.
"And you brought a friend?" Excitement enters her voice.
"I brought a witness," I correct stiffly.
"What an excellent idea. We can't have that academy of yours saying we coerced you into something."
I clench my free hand, trying to hold my tongue.
"Follow me." Angela walks off down the corridor, leaving the two of us to trail behind her.
"It's going to be okay," Mathias whispers to me.
I wish I could believe him, but there's a big part of me doubting that at the moment.
This part of the house is newer and better kept than the part I lived in, which only goes to reaffirm what I already know about how little they care about me and the others. But that's not the problem I'm here to deal with. Maybe once I'm free of the Shadow Association, I can work on the best way to free other people from it.
If I'm lucky, maybe I'll even manage to find Mathias' cousin. Though I guess there's a chance Stephanie doesn't want to leave the Association.
We enter a room where a group of adults I recognise from my time here stands in a circle. I should really stop thinking about them as adults with authority over me for no other reason than I'm a child. I'm over eighteen now. They can't control me anymore.
"Welcome, Syxe Weston, please join Annalise in the centre of the room," Angela says.
I glance at Mathias but let go of his hand and walk forward. At least no one has asked me to take off my scythe. It's offering me some reassurance, and a reminder of the person I'm trying to be.
Annalise glares at me as I go to stand beside her. I resist the urge to roll my eyes. She's probably just mad that I got to leave this place.
Or maybe not. She always seemed to be excited about the Association's rules, even when they were oppressive.
"Welcome to the Shadow Oath. Repeat after me," Agatha says.
I raise my eyebrows. Is this how they plan things to go? No explanations, no conversation, just this is what you have to agree to or else? I can't believe no one has brought this to light before.
"I swear on the life of myself, and on those of my descendants, that I will uphold the laws of the Shadow Association..."
Annalise instantly repeats the words, not even pausing to consider what they mean.
I keep my lips pressed closely together. I won't say that. Not only do I not want to swear on my life to uphold rules I'm not aware of, but I'm not going to swear away anything not belonging to me. My currently non-existent descendants are not mine to give away.
I wonder if this is how they got me?
"I forswear any allegiance to a supernatural organisation that is not the Shadow Association," Angela continues, not acknowledging my silence.
This time, Annalise does raise an eyebrow. Perhaps they haven't explained to her about the supernatural part yet. Despite whatever second thoughts she might be having, she repeats the words.
I don't.
I resist the urge to check on Mathias. But I don't need to in order to know what his face will look like. He'll probably be pulling a face that ref
lects the way I feel about all of this.
Angela holds her head up high. "I pledge myself to the Shadow Association until the day I die."
Annalise swears proudly.
Silence descends on the entire room as all eyes turn to me.
"Syxe?" Angela prompts once it becomes clear I'm not going to say anything.
I meet her gaze, hoping my defiance shows on my face. "I do not swear on the life of myself, nor on those of my descendants, that I will uphold the laws of the Shadow Association. I do not forswear any allegiance to a supernatural organisation that is not the Shadow Association. I do not pledge myself to the Shadow Association until the day I die." I pause to make sure the meaning of my words reaches everyone who is assembled to witness this occasion. "I reject what the Shadow Association stands for and will have no part in it."
Without waiting for anyone to respond, I turn around. Annalise reaches out to stop me.
"You'll regret this," she hisses.
"No, I don't think I will," I reply. "My place is not in the house. I am not a puppet. I will not sign away the lives of people who are not born yet. I will not be a part of this system."
I hold my head up high and walk out of the room. No one stops me, I think they're all too shocked about what I've just done.
Mathias hurries behind me. I hope he's checking to make sure no one is following me. But even if they do, I'm not sure how they can stop me from leaving.
I push through the front door and out into the fresh air. I take a deep breath and ready myself for what's to come.
"You were amazing in there," Mathias says once we're away from the building and anyone overhearing.
"Thank you. It was terrifying," I admit. My heart still pounds from the exhilaration and fear.
"I'm proud of you for doing it anyway."
"Thanks. But I don't think this is over." I glance back at the Association building. They aren't going to give up on me that easily.
But that's okay. I know their secret now. All I have to do is prove that they acquired me illegally, and I'll be properly free of them.
And after that, I can focus on becoming the best reaper I possibly can.
Shadow Seer (Scythe Grove Academy Book 1) Page 7