“Both of your parents are living?”
“Yes. But I was never very close to them. Remember, I was away most of my school years, and never came home after I graduated.”
“Do you have siblings?”
Xander stiffened. “Thought you no longer cared about who I was?”
Grace glanced up at him. “I didn’t mean to pry.”
Xander nodded and swallowed hard. “One brother who I haven’t spoken to since I was ten.” Xander squeezed her hand. “Let’s not talk about this, okay? The day has been too perfect to bring us down.”
Grace nodded. “I’ve got to stop by my mom’s house tomorrow. A friend of hers is stopping by to give me some names of people that can help me clean out.”
“What do you need cleaned out? I can help so you don’t have to hire someone.”
Grace stopped next to the car, waiting for Xander to unlock it. “You don’t want to do that. It’s a mess. Years of accumulation that Mom couldn’t be bothered to go through. I have no idea where half the crap came from.”
“Come on. You would rather have some stranger helping you than me?”
Grace shook her head. “Not really. I’ll call Hattie when I get home and tell her I won’t need the names.”
“Hattie?”
“Yes. She works for one of the neighbors, I believe. She always came by and visited my mom on her day off. Never missed a week. Even as a child, I remember her always being there. She’s a wonderful woman, almost a second mom to me.”
Xander swallowed hard. He had to speak to Hattie and ask that she not let Grace know who he was. Grace must hate his family, yet he had no idea that Grace knew Hattie.
Grace sat waiting. “Did you hear me?”
Xander glanced over. “No, I’m sorry.”
“I asked if you knew the Stevens in town.”
“Yeah, heard of them.”
Grace nodded. She sensed it was not a conversation Xander wanted to have, either. She was curious about his past, but enjoyed the freedom of not knowing too much to push it.
“Have you ever been skydiving?” Grace turned in her seat to watch him.
“No, actually I never had. Not sure I would have the courage to rely on a section of fabric to stop me from splattering all over the ground.”
Giggling escaped Grace. “I never took you for a coward.”
“Coward?”
“Chicken to try?”
“Is that the next thing on your bucket list, Gracie-girl?”
“What’s with the Gracie-girl?”
Xander shrugged. “I don’t know. I like it.”
Grace couldn’t help but glow. What was it about a simple nickname that brought a smile to her face and put a song in her heart? Xander had changed her focus in such a short time of knowing him. Was it just the rebellious girl in her that was fighting to get out? She wasn’t doing anything too rebellious, but she wanted more from life. Not this mundane, same ol’ day after day routine that she had fallen into. She cried out mentally for a new life, one she knew she would never get. One that was only available to her in her dreams.
“What’re your plans for tonight?” Xander broke through Grace’s thoughts.
“No plans. Probably start that dreaded packing.”
“I still don’t understand why you have to give up your apartment. Rent the house if you feel the need to keep it.”
“I don’t have a choice. I will know more after Monday and meeting with the lawyer, but I have a feeling that Mom was up to something, and her will is going to tie me to that house for a while.”
* * *
“You think she would have tried to control your future that way?” Xander couldn’t fathom Abigail pulling a stunt like that. With whatever dealings he had had with her, she seemed so considerate and encourage for him to do his thing. Did she have a double standard when it came to her own child?
“Unfortunately, yes. She gave me a heads up unknowingly when she was begging me to make promises to her that she knew were not in my plans.” Grace sighed. “I loved her so much that I couldn’t tell her I wouldn’t do it…but she knew I found that house suffocating.”
“Why?”
Grace glanced at Xander. “Why what?”
“Why is that house suffocating to you?”
Grace shrugged. “It’s just…growing up, there were so many happy memories with my dad and mom. After Dad died, Mom changed a bit. She was more depressed, which I know was normal, but it was like the laughter and happiness was gone.”
“Hey, at least you had the laughter and happiness. It doesn’t mean the house has to be a bad place for you. Make your own memories now…do something in the house to totally change it to fit you.”
Grace smiled. “You make it sound so easy.”
“No, I know it’s not easy. It takes work and sometimes it’s hardest to make the changes to something that carries happy memories, but there comes a time where you have to do what is right for you.”
“Like you staying away from your family? Never putting down roots?”
The question hit Xander like a ton of bricks. Was that the reason he moved from place to place, because it was too hard to actually stand up to his parents and say what he wanted? Or was it because what he felt was right for him? Xander pulled into Grace’s driveway and shut the vehicle off. “I honestly don’t know why I live my life the way I do. Rebellion, I guess.”
“So when’s it time to grow up?” Grace’s voice was soft and gentle, like she was talking to one of her second graders. “You give good advice, but I don’t think you live it.”
“You’re right. And I don’t have an answer as to why that is.” Xander grabbed Grace’s hand, lifted it to his lips, and pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand.
* * *
Grace’s stomach fluttered. She watched him, his eyes never leaving hers. His lips caressed her hand, turning it over and kissing her palm. A soft moan escaped Grace. She watched his lips curve into a smile against her hand. “Come in the house,” she said and reached for the door handle.
“I really should be going…not that I don’t want to, but I want us to take this slow.”
Grace nodded. She was grateful for his sentiment, but right now she just wanted to feel those lips everywhere on her body. Her eyes never left Xander’s as he leaned close and brushed his lips against hers. She pressed closer, winding her fingers through his hair. Grace felt a loss of heat when Xander pulled away. His breathing was heavy and he closed his eyes to gain control.
Grace watched Xander drive off on his motorcycle and felt the frustration rolling around in her. She had the weekend to pull together packing her apartment before meeting with the lawyer Monday. She needed to stay away from Xander or nothing would get done. She turned towards the house, anxious to remove her bandage and check out her new tattoo.
Chapter 8
Xander’s cell phone started ringing as he drove up to his parent’s house. Unknown number. He contemplated ignoring it, but then hit answer. “Xander Stevens.”
“Mr. Stevens. This is Bob Rollins. I’m the attorney in charge of the will of Abigail McAllister. Did you know Mrs. McAllister?”
“Yes, sir, I did.” Xander glanced at his watch. He was already five minutes late for dinner and his parents were sticklers for punctuality. He shut off the motorcycle, staying seated for the conversation.
“Mr. Stevens, I need for you to stop by my office on Monday, if possible.”
“I’m sorry, Mr. Rollins, but what is this all about?” Xander paced on the front porch.
“It’s a matter of formality. Mrs. McAllister has named you in her will and I need you here to go over things.”
Xander stopped short. “What? That’s impossible.” Grace was going to have a hemorrhage. What had Abigail been up to?
“Not impossible, Mr. Stevens. Please, can you be here Monday?”
“I’m not sure. Let me call you back. I was supposed to be back at work on Monday.” The lie rolled off Xander’s lips
in desperation to be away from this situation.
“Please, Mr. Stevens, let me know as soon as possible. I can’t finalize the will without all parties being aware of what is going on.”
Xander promised to call him Monday morning if he couldn’t make it, otherwise he would be there. He hauled in a breath, his chest tight with anxiety. He bent over with his hands on his knees, taking slow deep breaths. This was not happening.
Xander slammed the door behind him, striding towards the dining room.
“You’re late, Sebastian.” His father’s voice grated on his last nerve.
“Well, I don’t have to stay if it is inconvenient.” Xander stood behind the place setting intended for him.
“Sebastian, don’t be ridiculous. I’m sure you have a perfectly good reason for keeping us waiting.” His mother’s voice soothed the situation and Xander felt sorry for her. He pulled out the chair and sat down.
“Apparently, you don’t remember that we dress for dinner.” His father’s snide comment stiffened Xander’s back.
“I could have changed, but I would have been even later and figured that would be so inappropriate for you.”
Xander met his father’s eyes, never wavering. His father broke the eye contact. Although a small victory, Xander knew it would just irritate his father to the point where there would be another confrontation, in private of course.
No confrontation had ever been in front of Xander’s mother. John Stevens felt that private confrontation as much more intimidating. Xander could never figure out why would a father want to intimidate his child. Xander’s mind went to Grace. She would be a good mother. He could just see it when she talked about her students. She loved children and he knew instinctively that she had more love in her than most mothers showed their children…at least in his experience.
“Sebastian, are you listening to your mother?” John’s roar broke through Xander’s thoughts.
“Sorry, Mother. What were you saying?”
Elizabeth glanced at her husband. “It was not important, dear.”
“Elizabeth, of course it was. Your son needs to pay attention to you when you are talking. He obviously hasn’t picked up on how to respect a lady in the room.”
Xander sighed softly. “Yes, Mother, please tell me again.”
“I was just saying that I hear there were going to be changes at the McAllister home. I’m hoping we will finally get some decent neighbors.”
Xander laid his fork down. “What kind of changes?”
“I don’t know. I assumed that was going to mean that the daughter would sell the place. She left her mother anyway, obviously didn’t want anything to do with her.”
“You know that’s not true, Mother.” Xander stood. “I’ve had enough of this.”
“Where are you going? Sit down, Sebastian.” John stood, his fist on the table.
“No, Father. I’m done with this. You think ill of everyone around here. Grace took care of her mother while working full time. So what if she lived in an apartment instead of under Abigail’s roof?” Xander took in a deep breath.
“Sebastian. You will not speak to your parents that way. Sit down.” John slammed his hand down on the table.
“No.” Xander kissed his mother’s cheek and headed for the door. He detoured to the back of the house to find Hattie.
“Oh, child, you’ve gone and done it now.” Hattie stood just inside the door, obviously hearing the entire conversation.
“You know it needed to be said. I’m headed out. I’ll stop by your place later this week in the evening.” He drew Hattie into a hug and held her close. “I love you, Hattie.”
“Love you, too, child. Now you go on.” She shooed him out the back door.
Xander started his motorcycle and just started riding. The hotel was too oppressing to go to. He longed to go to Grace’s, but knew he wasn’t in the right frame of mind to see her. He allowed the wind to pull at him as he increased his speed. The fluidity with the bike eased his tension and his focus soon became just on the ride and the enjoyment it brought him.
Xander found himself on the familiar road to Dave’s place. He pulled up, relieved when he saw lights on.
He pounded on the door and waited. The door swung open, Dave shaking his head at him. “Dude, you look terrible. Come on it.”
“Thanks.”
“Beer?”
“Yup.” Xander fell into the familiar one-word conversation with his college buddy. Dave was the only one that knew exactly how his childhood had been and the relationship he had with his parents.
“Been visiting the folks?”
“Yup.” Xander drained his beer.
“Wow, that good, huh?”
“Man, how did life just get like that for them?
“Okay, let’s back up a minute. Who was the hottie you were with today?” Dave handed Xander another beer.
“Grace?”
“Yeah, man. Spill it.”
Xander shook his head. “Nothing to tell.”
“Bull. I saw the way you looked at her. You are usually a man that is hands off in relationships. The way you two interacted, there’s more there than that.”
Xander took a swig of his beer. “I don’t know. She’s different.” He peeled the label off his beer bottle. “Remember the old lady that used to write to me?”
“Yeah, the one you said helped you get your act together when you were in trouble.”
“Yup, that’s her. She died and I went home to the funeral.”
“And?” Dave watched Xander.
“She was Grace’s mother.”
Dave chuckled. “Now this gets interesting. Does Grace know that you were her mother’s project?”
“Project? Really? Is that how you look at it?”
“I don’t know. You tell me. Was it more than that?”
Xander shook his head. “I don’t know, but Grace doesn’t know that she was in touch with me; in fact, Grace doesn’t know who I really am.”
“Man, you’ve got to tell her.”
Xander sat forward. “It gets better.” He stood and paced the living room.
“Spill it before you wear a hole in the carpet.”
Xander stopped and stared at him. “Apparently I have been named in Abigail’s will. I am supposed to go to the reading of the will on Monday. Grace is going to be blindsided by this.”
“Shit. You’ve got to tell her.”
“I can’t. I’m going to call the lawyer and tell him I can’t go.”
Dave shook his head at him. “You’ve got to talk to Grace.”
Xander sank into the chair. This was becoming a nightmare. The chest tightness started again and he knew he had to get out of town.
“I know that look, man.” Dave grabbed the empty bottle from Xander’s hand. “Don’t you dare run.”
Xander sighed and closed his eyes, laying his head back against the chair. “It’s all I know how to do. I’ve run from years from the hard stuff.”
“Let me ask you this. You said Grace was different. Is she worth fighting for?”
“She is.”
“So, why are you thinking of running?”
Nothing.
“Well?
“I question if I’m even worth it.”
Chapter 9
Xander spent the weekend with Dave. They had worked on reshingling his roof Saturday, drank that evening and now Sunday was here. They had both avoided the subject of the will and Grace. Xander appreciated his friend’s consideration of not bringing the subject up. But time was running out and Xander was no closer to deciding what he was going to do about the meeting with the lawyer tomorrow.
As the afternoon drew to a close, Dave and Xander sat in the shade of Dave’s backyard, eating hamburgers and sipping beers. “Whatcha going do?”
Xander grinned. “I knew you would ask eventually. I don’t know yet.”
“You haven’t spoken to her all weekend.”
“I know. She probably is upset about that
too, but I don’t have her phone number.”
Dave snorted. “Yeah, and I don’t have internet for you to look it up.”
“Whatever. You know me.”
“I know you usually blow women off, but Grace is different. You’re different around her. I saw that in the brief couple of hours I saw you together Friday.”
Xander glanced at Dave. “Do you ever wish you had more?”
“More as in a girlfriend or wife? No way, man. I like the bachelor life.”
“I thought I did, too.” Xander shook his head. “This conversation is getting to sappy.”
They spent the next hour throwing horseshoes and laughing about their college days. As dusk set in, Xander knew he had avoided Grace and the subject of his identity long enough. He started the motorcycle and promised Dave he would stay in touch. He headed the bike towards the town that was beginning to stifle him again. In a blink, the decision flashed through his mind. He would call and not go to the reading of the will. He would ask the lawyer not to mention his name to Grace until they had had a chance to meet. He wanted a meeting without Grace present. He swung into the hotel parking lot, went in and stretched out on the bed. Guilt bombarded him as his thoughts drifted to Grace.
He was wrong to have blown her off all weekend. He sighed and glanced at the clock. It was already ten at night. He couldn’t call her now. Xander drifted off to sleep with visions of Grace, her hair flowing on the motorcycle. He could feel her grip his hand as she received the tattoo. She was so open to new adventures, and he was running scared once again.
The sun shone directly into Xander’s eyes the next morning. He pulled the pillow over his head and cursed the lack of sleep he had gotten. He dragged himself to the shower. Allowing the hot water to rain over him, he felt the tension easy away. He berated himself for being a coward, knowing he had to call the lawyer this morning and bail on going to the reading of the will. He could almost feel the disapproval from Abigail. Why did he even care? A few letters from a motherly figure and he felt obligated to still make her proud of him. He didn’t have that obligation to his own mother-- of course his mother never cared whether he got his act together truly, only that he was an embarrassment to the Stevens’ name.
A Fine Line Page 5