Honor (Blind Vows #2)

by J. M. Witt

  “Heath, I…”

  “Yes?” She seemed unsure as she searched my eyes. “What is it, angel?”

  “I just…” her eyes closed before she dropped her head to my shoulder.

  Pulling back so I could see her, I cradled her face in my hands, and pleaded with her. “Tell me, please. You can talk to me. I’m not going anywhere.”

  Searching my eyes and pulling her upper lip between her teeth, she confided in me. “I just want you to know how happy I’ve been these past couple weeks.” She paused and I knew if she just said the words, I would say them back without hesitation or remorse. “I’ve never felt this way.”

  Smiling and playing with her hair, I echoed her sentiment, “Me, too.”

  Whispering against my lips, she said the three words that made me lose my control. “Make me yours.” They weren’t the words I was hoping to hear, but they were a close second. Maybe it was her way of telling me she loved me.

  Rolling over, I dropped my weight on her as she relaxed into the bed. Lifting her arms, I had her grip the headboard and warned her, “Don’t move.” Her eyes closed and her back arched in response.

  Letting my hand move down her arm, over her underarm, I watched as she bit her lip trying to avoid laughing. She was very ticklish and we’d spent a good amount of time overcoming that. Gripping her neck gently, the way she liked, I pulled her lower lip between my teeth. Grinding my pelvis into hers, she mewled out her desire.

  Growling out what I knew she loved hearing, “Mine.” She released a breath, like a surrender, and gave herself over to me.

  Kneeling up, I pulled my sweats and boxer briefs down in one motion. Holding her ankle, I kissed up her leg until my face was buried between her legs and nipping at her through her lace panties. They were damp with her desire and I easily slid them off her. Reaching under her back to remove her bra, I slid the cups up to expose her breasts. She knew not to let go of the headboard as I moved the bra up her arms.

  “You can take it off, then put your hands back.”

  I loved seeing her body stretched out for me. Legs resting on top of mine, her nipples puckered and pointing to the ceiling, she was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. Sucking her breast into my mouth while my fingers pinched the other nipple, her pants of pleasure were like music to my ears. Stretching my arm out, I pulled open the drawer where we kept the condoms.

  “Heath.” Turning to her, she surprised me with her request. “No barriers, not anymore.”

  A million things ran through my head. I had told myself I wouldn’t remove the barrier between us until she told me she loved me, when and if she ever did. I know that it was silly, but it was what it was.

  Sensing my hesitation, she alerted me to information I wasn’t aware of. “I have an IUC, there’s no risk of a baby. Not until…we’re ready.” The thought of having kids with her elated me, but nothing was 100% safe and I wanted a few years with her before I gave up part of her to our kids. “I trust you.”

  “I trust you, too. It’s not that.” She stroked my face. “It’s purely selfish of me. I don’t want to share you with anyone, not even a baby. Not yet.”

  Leaning up, she kissed my lips. “I love how sweet you are. You’re something else, Heathcliff Kerrigan.” Not me, just how sweet I was. “Stop overthinking and make love to me.”

  ~ Chapter 9 ~

  She lay back down, wrapped her hands around the headboard, and smiled at me. Fuck it. I’d pull out, if I could manage it. I wanted to feel her the way it was meant to be. Kissing her neck and all the way down her body, I drove her to the brink with my tongue and stopped before she fell over the edge.

  Smiling, I leaned over her face as she cursed me. “One day you’re going to wake up tied to the bed with me sitting on your face, you fucking tease.”

  Shrugging my shoulders, I encouraged her, “Sounds like a good time to me.” She started to speak and moaned instead when I slid into her. Momentarily forgetting I wasn’t wearing a condom, I groaned my appreciation. “Fuck, Lucy.’

  “Yes, I know. Fuck Lucy. Now!” Rocking back, I sank into her all the way as a shiver passed over her. “Heath, kiss me, please.”

  Kissing her, my hips moved in and out of her with deliberate intention. Running my hand up her arms, I pried them from the headboard, and she flung them around my neck. Nails digging into my shoulders, her teeth nipped at my neck and my ear.

  “I, oh, God. Don’t, yes.” She was speaking in tongues and I kissed her into silence.

  “Relax and breathe. Let it consume you the way you consume me.”

  I felt her relax around me as she tried to catch her breath. Gripping my cock tighter, her breath came in quick bursts as she cried out. “Don’t stop, not till you cum.”

  I did just that, pumped in and out of her as her whole body flinched underneath me. Just before I was about to cum, I pulled out and her hand covered my own as my seed shot all over our hands. With her other hand, she pulled my mouth down to hers and kissed me until the sensations ceased. After cleaning up, we slept naked and tangled around one another and made love a few more times that night.

  We woke Christmas morning to the sound of our phones ringing. We’d slept most of the morning away and I wanted nothing more than to turn our phones off and hide away with my wife.

  We exchanged gifts and I loved what she got me. Some clothes and a watch that she had engraved with ‘To Heath, my new favorite flavor.’ I wouldn’t be able to show the engraving to anyone and loved it even more because of that. Bravely, I got her some more lingerie and some diamond studs. When she opened the earrings, she seemed genuinely surprised and put them right in. Promising to model the lingerie later, we got ready to head to my family’s place to enjoy the holiday with our families.

  I was in the basement at the bar with my brothers, minus O who was still deployed. D’Artagnan wandered off and Dorian brought up the subject I was worried he would. I tried to get him and Will to drop it. It was the last thing I wanted to deal with or discuss, especially on Christmas.

  “Heath, man, I understand, but Dorian’s right. You have to tell her the truth.”

  “The truth about what?”

  We all turned around to a stone faced Lucy. Slowly D and Dorian left and Will stepped to the other side of the room. I took a few steps toward her and took her hand. This was the last thing I wanted and especially not on Christmas. I knew I had to tell her, I just wanted to get through Christmas and get us moved into my place, which we were planning to do after New Year’s.

  “Lucy, I, shit.”

  “Heath, you’re scaring me. What’s going on?”

  “I’m not your match.” I just spit it out and waited for her wrath.

  She started laughing, “Yes you are. Stop messing around.” She glanced over to Will and then back to me and the looks on our faces must’ve given it away. She blinked and questioned me, “What do you mean?”

  “I’m not your match. You were supposed to marry Will. Not me.”

  She blinked and began mumbling. “But how, what? I don’t understand.”

  Will walked over and began talking and I was grateful, for once, for him interjecting. I couldn’t even process everything he was saying, my attention fully focused on Lucy. Her face paled and then she started turning red. Her hand released mine and started clenching at her side. Will finished telling her and the three of us stood silent for a few minutes, waiting for her to say something, anything.

  Turning her back on us, I could see her body shaking. Will and I exchanged a nod and he started to exit the room, leaving me alone with Lucy. Stopping in front of Lucy, he began to apologize to her and was met with a slap to the face.

  “I don’t want your apology!”

  “Lucy.” She turned on me just as quick and smacked me, too.”

  “Who all knew? Everyone? Is this another prank? Jesus. How could you do this to me again?” She was pacing the room and Will had disappeared.

  “Please let me explain.”

 
; She was nearly delusional, laughing and screaming at the same time. “Explain? How about you explain to me how it is that I fell for your act all over again? I thought…”

  She didn’t finish her statement and I had to ask, “You thought what?”

  Stopping, she stared at me and broke my heart with her words. “I thought I was falling in love with you. How could I have been so wrong?”

  “Please, you’re not wrong. Everything between us is real. Lucy, I lov…”

  “NO! Don’t you dare say that to me! You don’t know the meaning of the word. You’ve lied to me for weeks.” She started hyperventilating and to make matters worse, my mom came into the room just then.

  “Lucy, Heath, what’s going on?”

  “Please. Like you don’t know?”

  “She doesn’t know, Lucy.”

  My mother looked between the two of us and demanded, “Know what?”

  I couldn’t find the words and Lucy outed me out to my mom, not that I blamed her. “It seems that I was supposed to marry Will, not Heath. The boys did a switch-a-roo on me once again.”

  “What? Once again?”

  “That summer, ten years ago. They did the same thing, only I thought I was spending all my time with Will to find out it was really Heath.”

  “Honey, of course it was Heath. He’s been in love with you since you were a little girl.”

  “Mom!” Looking to Lucy, she looked ill. “You’re not helping mom.”

  “Son, is this true about the wedding? Please tell me it’s not.” I didn’t have to say anything for her to know the truth. “Heathcliff Daniel Kerrigan. Get out of my sight while I talk to Lucy.”

  “Mom.”

  “Now.”

  I looked to Lucy, but she refused to make eye contact with me. I left the room and grabbed a drink before I locked myself in the back bathroom. I couldn’t begin to imagine what my mother was telling Lucy, but I prayed that it helped. The events that led up to the wedding began running through my head once again.

  I’d just gotten home and found Dorian and Will in the kitchen talking. As I approached, I realized it was a heated discussion.

  “Everything ok? We still going out tonight. Big day’s tomorrow, Will!”

  Dorian glanced at Will and shook his head. “You can’t marry her, Will.”

  “Don’t you think I know that? Christ.”

  “Chickening out, huh?” I drank my water and waited for my brother’s reasoning for cold feet.

  “It’s Lucy.”

  Choking on my water, once I could speak again I questioned them. “What do you mean it’s Lucy?”

  They explained that Dorian put the pieces together earlier that day. Dorian was business partners with Lucy’s brother and he’d let it slip to Dorian. Dorian then called the hotel where one of the staff members confirmed that the Roberts Kerrigan wedding was taking place the next day.

  They knew how I felt about her and how Will had never felt that way. Will was ready to confront her and call the whole thing off. Me, I’m the one who decided the wedding could still take place. Will and Dorian being the supportive brothers they were, went along with the plan. I ran to the nearest jewelry store and bought the anchor necklace. I was on cloud nine as long as we could pull it off.

  When the justice of the peace showed up at the hotel the next morning, our plan was made even easier. The marriage certificate didn’t have Will’s name on it, so I was able to put my name. Now I just had to convince Lucy to follow through with it when she saw me standing at the altar waiting for her. I was still worried that if given the choice between Will and myself, I’d always be the loser.

  “Son.” My mother’s voice carried through the door and I opened it. “I can’t believe you and Will did this to her. And don’t get me started on that prank ten years ago. I raised you boys better than that.

  “I know. Where is she? I need to try to explain, make it right.”

  “She left.”

  “What do you mean she left?”

  “Heathcliff, she’s incredibly hurt and confused. You need to give her some space to sort through her feelings.”

  “The hell I do. She’s my wife!”

  “Yes, she is. She loves you, I truly believe that. But you’ve crushed her with your secret. You need to give her time.”

  “I can’t. I have to see her.”

  “You’re not going to find her, not right away.”

  “What did you do? Dammit mom!”

  “I’m not going to tell you where she is, not until she agrees to see you. I love you and if you weren’t grown I’d consider taking the belt to you.” The tears began to fall as my mom pulled me in her arms. “Have you told her you love her?”

  Shaking my head, I replied, “No. Mom, please tell me where she is. I have to tell her.”

  “I won’t, not yet. Trust me. You need to give her time. She’s your wife and that can’t change overnight. Have faith in what you’ve built, even if you built it on false pretense.” She sighed and asked another question I hadn’t thought of. “Why didn’t you and Will just tell her the truth and let her decide?”

  “Because I’ve never believed she’d pick me.”

  “You’re a fool Heathcliff. That girl loves you. Always has.”

  Will drove me back to the city a couple of hours later. I’d tried calling and texting her and got no answer. My car was parked in her parking lot, but her car was gone. When I made it up to the apartment, I prayed she’d be there, knowing she wasn’t. Drawers were open in the dresser. Evidence that she’d clearly left in a hurry. Her toothbrush and other toiletries were all gone, too.

  Grabbing a bottle of liquor from the kitchen cabinet, I sat on the bed and stared at my feet before downing a good portion of the bottle. All I wanted to do the rest of my life was honor her with a love she’d never known and one she’d never want to let go of. Now I was worried I’d lost her for good. I prayed my mother was right, that Lucy was in love with me and would come back to me.

  I woke the next morning to someone banging on the apartment door. My head was pounding from the copious amounts of alcohol I’d ingested. Walking to the door in just my underwear, I flung the door open.

  It was Will.

  “What’s going on?” He looked like he’d seen a ghost. He couldn’t form words and looked like he’d been crying. “Is it Lucy? What’s going on?”

  Shaking his head, he croaked out, “It’s O.”

  My heart plummeted. I couldn’t take much more. O was on another tour of duty and we all knew the risks. I wasn’t sure if I was going to be able to handle what Will was about to tell me.

  Will Lucy honor love and trust Heath with her heart?

  LOVE: Blind Vows

  Part 3: Lucy & Heath’s POV

  Releasing June 24, 2015

  Playlist

  History In The Making by Darius Rucker

  The Reason by Hoobastank

  Only You by Matthew Perryman

  Bad Girl by Avril Lavigne

  Animals by Chris Call

  Ride by SoMo

  More from J.M. Witt

  The Anchored Hearts Series

  Letting Go (Vol. 1) *

  Hiding Away (Vol. 1.5) *

  Letting Go of You (Vol. 2) *

  Fading Away (Vol. 2.5) *

  Letting Go of Us (Vol. 3) *

  Concrete Soul (Vol. 4) * * * (Paul’s story)

  Untitled (Vol. 5) * * * (Smith’s story)

  Drifting Away (Vol. 6) * * * (Cal & Jane: whole series epilogue)

  The Blind Vows Series

  Trust ~ April 2015 ~ ebook only

  Honor ~ May 2015 ~ ebook only

  Love ~ June 2015 ~ ebook only

  Trust, Honor, Love ~ July 2015 ~ paperback

  Which Kerrigan brother will be next?

  The Convicted Series

  Publisher: Booktrope

  Convicted Heart * * *

  Convicted Fidelity * * *

  Convicted Justice * * *

  Out Now =
* Coming Soon = * * *

  About the Author

  J.M. resides in Metro Detroit, MI with her husband and four small children.

  Always wanting to write romance novels, she followed her dreams after having baby #4, who may or may not be the spawn of Christian Grey!

  She hopes you’ll enjoy more than a good book, but have an experience.

  You can find her at

  www.jmwittbooks.com

  Twitter #wittymomauthor

  www.facebook.com/jmwittbooks

  Amazon