Trap Goddess

by Sasha Ravae

  Before the last word left his mouth, the audience rose to their feet in applause. Jonah stood in front of the microphone and embraced their appreciation. It was only affirmation that he was making his father proud despite his outside activities. Suddenly, the front doors of the center flew open. Two masked men dressed in all black stood behind the crowd who were still on their feet for only a half a second before they opened fire.

  BLAT. BLAT. BLAAAT.

  In a haze of screams and confusion, the room scattered. Many of the parents and volunteers threw themselves on top of the children hoping to shield them from the bullets that lightly filled the air, but just like that, it was over.

  “Noooo,” Trina screamed as her eyes finally found Jonah. His body was laid across the stage with blood pouring from a permanent hole in his head. “Please no,” she continued to cry.

  She quickly rushed up the small flight of steps to the stage. All she could do was stare down at Jonah’s lifeless face; she knew he was gone. She slowly knelt down beside the love of her life and lightly placed his head in her lap. As she stroked the side of his still warm cheek, his scruffy beard brushed against her hand, and his blood covered her, but she didn’t care. Within seconds, he had been snatched from her. Her pain could be heard from even outside, and the cameras never stopped rolling. Trina draped herself over Jonah one last time as her soul searched for his, but she felt nothing.

  Chapter 5

  Trina walked through the front door into the darkness that awaited her. Mascara stains traced her face with every tear that fell. She was empty. Jonah was immediately rushed to the hospital but was pronounced dead on the scene. She watched as they draped a white sheet over his body, but she prayed God still preformed miracles. Jonah had lost his life, and she had no one to blame. She hated the world. She quietly sat next to his body in the hospital with his blood still on her hands continuing to play with the red-tinted ring that sat on her left hand. It didn’t look the same. The shine that was once there was now gone, and Trina lost the life Jonah had promised to give her forever.

  “Trina, you need to me do anything?” Ron asked walking in the door behind her with his head down.

  “Why did this happen, Ron?” she finally screamed, “Why Jonah?”

  “Man, believe me when I say that we’re getting to the bottom of this. The only reason why we didn’t lay them two fuck boys out was because of all the kids running around. By the time Reko and Omari got outside, they were gone. They pulled out in a black Camaro.”

  “What am I supposed to do now?”

  “Trina, everything is gonna be alright. I’ma make sure of that. I promise you that we’re gonna make this right.”

  “Make it right? Make it right how, Ron? Jonah is fucking dead. Oh my god,” she paused, “I can’t even believe I’m saying that.” Her eyes were blood shot from the pain she couldn’t contain. “Jonah is dead. What am I supposed to tell his kids?”

  Ron just stared down at the ground. He didn’t have the answers that she was desperately begging him for.

  “I have to lay down,” she said wiping her wet, colorless face, “I’ma sleep in the guestroom. I can’t go upstairs right now.”

  “I’ll be out here, ma. Holla if you need anything.”

  “Thank you,” she said walking into the room her and Jonah had been in only hours before. With no energy left to even think, Trina climbed into the unmade bed with his blood still painted on her clothes and skin. She grabbed his pillow and became lost in his scent.

  “I love you,” she said closing her eyes before drifting off to sleep.

  . . .

  Three Days Later…

  Trina sat back in an all-black hearse right across from Renee. Jonah’s mother Marie asked if they could put their differences aside for the sake of the children. She wanted them to be able to lay their father to rest in love and without all the hate that still existed between Trina and Renee. Trina sat with her legs crossed to the side and her hands folded in her lap. The small black lace veil that adorned her face couldn’t shield her from Renee’s constant eye rolling. She kept looking over at Marie trying to remind herself why she was there. As much as she was hurt about Jonah’s death, it pained her even more to see the faces of his children. They were too young to understand why their daddy had to go to heaven, and Renee didn’t have the words to comfort them.

  “Hey, Tiana and Jo, I have something for you.”

  Their small bodies perked up slightly. “What is it?” they asked in unison.

  She handed two envelopes to Renee whom reluctantly extended her hand. The look on her face was as if the envelopes were going to explode as soon as they touched her. She despised Trina.

  “Your father kept two accounts that he used to put money in for you guys.”

  “Money for what?” Renee asked skeptically.

  “I don’t know honestly. I mean I guess you could look at it like a college fund. He was just constantly putting money into them.”

  Renee opened the envelopes and examined the bank statements that sat inside each one.

  “$500,000?” she asked in disbelief.

  “Is that how much is in there?” Trina asked completely oblivious.

  “$500,000?” she asked again with her hand covering her mouth.

  “Jonah didn’t go into specifics when it came to these accounts. I knew they were for the babies, so I never pressed the issue. Jonah’s lawyer should be in contact with you in the next few days to have both accounts switched over to your name.”

  “Praise Jesus himself,” Marie shouted.

  “Why are you doing this?”

  “Renee.”

  “No, Ms. Marie, it’s okay. Listen, Renee, me and you don’t have to like each other, but me and Jonah were engaged to be married. Just like you wanted me to respect you as the mother of his children, I wanted you to respect me as the woman in his life.”

  “Respect you?” she asked laughing.

  “Girls, we are burying my son today. Can you please do this another time?”

  “I’m sorry, Ms. Marie, but homegirl is delusional,” Renee said laughing again.

  “As Jonah’s fiancée, we shared accounts, again, except for those two. Jonah trusted me with everything and never did he keep anything from me, and that included your kids. I knew he was saving money for them just in case.”

  “Just in case of what?”

  “This I guess,” Trina said looking down.

  “What my children’s father did for our kids should not concern you anymore.”

  “I may have not been around that long, but Jonah had custody while we were together, which meant that for the year plus I was around him I was around them as well. I love these kids, and I know that Jonah would expect for me to look out for them the same as if he was here, and that’s what I plan to do.”

  “So what does that mean?”

  “That means that I’m here to help, Renee. You can hate me all you want, but don’t make the children suffer. Jonah put my name on everything for a reason. I have complete control over his assets,” she said as the car came to a stop.

  “You’re right. I don’t like you. Like I told Jonah, and like I told you, you will never be mommy to my kids. We don’t need you for shit while you politely flashing my baby daddy’s money around.”

  “Flashing? How am I flashing? I’m offering to help you.”

  “Fuck your help. As far as I know, you set all this shit up cause now you conveniently get to wash Jonah’s money for him.”

  “You think I had him killed?” Trina screamed lunging toward Renee. She tried to keep it civil for the kids, but her disrespect was outrageous.

  “Renee, take them and go inside,” Marie yelled, “You will not disrespect my son. Not today.”

  “Let’s go, babies,” she said grabbing the kids from their seats.

  Trina sat back and took a deep breath as she watched her walk inside the church with a child on each arm.

  “I’m sorry about that, Ms. Marie. I rea
lly just wanted to help.”

  “I know, sweetie, but it may not have come across as sincere to Renee.”

  “How so?” Trina asked confused.

  “You and I both know that she never got over Jonah, and here you are playing the grieving widow shelling out money to her kids.”

  “Me and Jonah do share accounts,” she said becoming defensive.

  “Believe me, baby, I am fully aware of how my son felt about you and the role you played in his life. I’m just saying don’t expect for you and Renee to become best friends over night.”

  “Believe me that was the last thing I was hoping for. I really just want to make sure Tiana and Jo are taken care of. I mean Jonah was all they knew.”

  “They will be. I promise,” Marie said getting out of the hearse. Trina grabbed her hand and they walked into the church.

  “Good morning, Mrs. Lee,” the funeral director said as soon as they entered, “We will be starting in just a few minutes. Many guests have come today to show their support for your family. We may have to turn some people away if it gets too crowded, but we wanted to make sure that you and the family have priority of course, so if you all will follow me.”

  Trina grabbed Marie’s hand tighter leading her down the aisle to the very first pew. As they walked, the church was silent, and Marie’s knees buckled at the sight of the dark mahogany casket that awaited them. Trina felt her heart beating faster and faster with each step she took, and she wasn’t ready to say goodbye. As they continued to walk down the aisle, she refused to acknowledge the box. She held her head down until her tears clouded her vision.

  “Okay, everyone, fill each row from left to right. Once we have confirmed that all of your guests are here, we will start letting in the others, and the service can begin.”

  “Can I get some water?” Marie asked.

  “Of course, Mrs. Lee. I’ll get that to you right away,” the director said lacing together his glove covered fingers as he walked back up the maroon aisle.

  “You okay, Ms. Marie?” Trina asked noticing that she couldn’t keep her legs still.

  “I’ll be okay. I just don’t know if it gets any easier to bury someone you love especially not like this,” she said wiping her tears, “You know when Jonah’s father died, I didn’t think that there was anything left inside of me to go on. If it wasn’t for my son…” She slowly lowered her head, and with her eyes closed, she softly said a prayer asking God to restore her strength. She was the last one left. “Even though you and Jonah never got the chance to make your love official, it was there. My son really loved you. I’m so sorry.”

  “Ms. Marie, this isn’t your fault. Ever since it happened, I have been begging God to give me a reason why. Jonah did so much for so many people…”

  “Sorry to interrupt,” the funeral director said handing Marie a small, white paper cup of water, “we’re just about ready to start, Mrs. Lee.”

  Without saying anything, she nodded her head. As the ushers opened the doors to the sanctuary, hundreds of people somberly walked in. Luckily Marie’s church was able to accommodate everyone who decided to come out to show their respects. After Jonah’s father died, she decided to stop going to his church. They had created so many memories there that it pained her to even be in its presence. In order to heal. She had to let go. After a few months, she finally found solace in New Life Church. The mega church would have turned her off years before with all of the cameras and attention it received, but now she found comfort in being lost in its sea of believers. Pastor Greene, agreed to hold the funeral there despite the community’s outrage. Ms. Esther begged Marie to hold the funeral at their church. It was his home, but Marie knew that the small, homely church didn’t have the capacity to send her son back to God the way he deserved. Jonah was loved by all who met him, and she wanted that love to carry him to his resting place.

  Once everyone got settled. Pastor Greene began. “Good morning, everyone, today we are here to celebrate the life of Brother Jonah Lee. I had the pleasure of meeting Sister Lee’s son,” he said motioning toward the front, “and let me tell you, he was an awesome young man as most of you may know.”

  Five minutes into the service, and there wasn’t a dry eye in the building. Jonah’s family and friends stared down at the still box as the pastor continued to speak. Trina stared at the bottom of the casket fearful to elevate her gaze. She knew that once she did, everything would become real, and she wasn’t ready for that. Jonah was the only good thing she had in her life, and now she had no idea who she was without him.

  “Let’s take a moment of silence for Brother Jonah,” Pastor Greene said closing his eyes. You could hear a pin drop as people silently prayed for him. Funerals in the city were becoming so routine, but none of the Rich Gang ever thought that they would be covering him with dirt next.

  “Now, I see we have a lot of people in attendance today, and I want to make sure that everyone is able to pay their last respects. Ushers, if we could start with the family.”

  One of the ushers extended his arm out and escorted Marie to Jonah’s body. The hole in his head prevented her from having an open casket, but she requested that the usher open it anyway. She couldn’t imagine her final goodbyes to her only son being through wood. When the usher slowly opened the top half of the casket, the wound in the middle of his forehead still looked fresh. Marie tried to look past it, but all she could see was that her son’s spirit had been stolen from him. She slowly bent down and kissed him on his cheek. “Rest easy, baby,” she whispered as she placed a solid gold cross in the palm of his hand. It belonged to his father. “We will be reunited one day, and I will have my family back once again. I will always love you, son.”

  She walked back to her seat as tears began to fall again. Her chest tightened, and it became hard for her to breathe. Everything felt so surreal. Trina was next. As she approached the casket, her heart almost stopped. The hole in his head was a constant reminder she wanted so much to forget.

  “Please close it,” she said to the usher, “Please close it. I don’t want him to be remembered like this.” She couldn’t believe what her king had been reduced to. He went from being a savior to just another statistic.

  The usher did as he was told and closed the casket shielding everyone else from seeing him as anything other than perfect. As Trina sat down, one by one, Jonah’s family and friends walked past the casket. She watched as Renee passed the box filled with her dreams of her and Jonah ever being together again, and she couldn’t help but cry. She cried for her children, but she silently promised him that she would do right by them this time. He had been there for their kids since day one. She always knew that they would be taken care of, and that even proved true in his death. Fifteen minutes later, many members of the Rich Gang found their way to the front of the church. As they stood in line, they didn’t utter a word. Jonah had been their leader, their mentor, their brother for years, so it was hard to even imagine going back to business as usual without him. For many of them, he helped set them up their own businesses, so that they didn’t have to depend on selling drugs just to eat. Jonah always felt like the dope game was a solution for the long run only if you did it right, so he helped his brothers open up their own studios, restaurants, clubs, whatever they had a real interest in, and with that, they were able to create a solid network of corner boys all the way to business executives, and everyone served their purpose. Jonah was able to invest his ill-gotten gains into something positive. He was their leader, but who would they look to now?

  Trina watched as Reko and Omari approached the casket. No words were spoken as the men stood there. The line began to build as Reko placed his hands on top of the box and lowered his head. BAM. He slammed his first on top of the casket, and the whole church instantly went silent.

  “Come on, man, not here,” Omari said pulling Reko away, “He’s gone.”

  Reko tried to hide the tears that began to form, but it was too late.

  “Excuse me, Ms. Marie,
I just need to talk to Reko really quick.”

  “Yes, go check on him, baby. You know him and Jonah have known each other since they were only five years old. Kindergarten I believe. As many people as Jonah grew to know over the years, Reko was always by his side. He’s a good boy.”

  “I’ll be right back,” Trina said standing up and smoothing out her mid-length, form fitting skirt. As Reko and Omari made their way to their seats, she followed closely behind them.

  “Reko,” she said trying not to be too loud, “Reko. Omari.” They both turned around to see her high-stepping towards them.

  “Can I talk to you guys please? Outside.”

  Without contesting, they walked alongside Trina as they exited the church doors.

  “I know what you’re gonna say, Trina, and believe me when I say that we’re gonna find whoever did that. I will kill the nigga who took my nigga from this world myself and that’s on mamas.”

  “Do you have any idea who would even do this?”

  “An idea, yes, but a name, no. I mean obviously it has to be the same niggas who killed Mal.”

  “But to go from a runner to…Jonah. Why?”

  “That’s what I plan to find out.”

  “We supposed to be meeting with Franco tomorrow,” Omari interrupted.

  “I know,” Trina said with her arms softly crossed across her chest.

  “How you know?” Reko asked confused.

  “Because I talked to Franco. He called the day after it happened to give his condolences, and I told him that Jonah was gonna reschedule the meeting for some time this week or next cause he got into it with Renee, and she was playing games with the kids but then this happened. Franco said he knew something was wrong when he didn’t hear from Jonah. He has a theory about what’s going on, but he wouldn’t say too much over the phone. I’m just hoping we can finally get some answers.”