Mind over Matter

by R. T. Martin

  “That’s Caroline trying to get in your head,” Cole said.

  “Well.” Yuan stared out the window. “It’s working.”

  Parker felt bad for her. He could stop all the rubber bands and spitballs he wanted, but there was only so much he could do. There wasn’t any way for him to stop Caroline from being so cruel if she didn’t actually do anything.

  “If this is what it’s going to be like to work with her,” Yuan continued, “I’m not sure I’ll audition for the next show. She can have it.”

  “Ugh,” Cole blurted out. “Don’t let her win.”

  Yuan shrugged. They spent the rest of the car ride in silence.

  9

  “Line up for dodgeball!” the P.E. teacher shouted as Parker and the rest of the class filed into the gym.

  In the past, dodgeball had been exactly that for Parker—he dodged balls. He didn’t try to throw. He didn’t try to catch. He just did his best to avoid oncoming balls until he was hit or his team won. He hated every single moment of it.

  The past week had been different. He didn’t fear dodgeball anymore because he’d gotten remarkably good at dodging. With a little help from his ability, he had managed not to get hit once.

  There had been a couple close calls. Kids on the other team had sworn the ball had curved for no reason, but Parker just shrugged and kept dodging. At one point, he’d been the last player on his team, but after slowing a ball considerably with his mind, he made a catch and saved his team from the brink of loss.

  Today was no different. Parker stayed in the back, allowing stronger and bigger kids to do the throwing while he dodged. His team wasn’t doing particularly well. Before long, it was down to just him and a kid named Kevin, who also solely dodged during these games.

  Parker looked across the gym. Paul Thornton was picking up one of the balls, and Parker could tell from the look he was giving him that Paul was about to throw it as hard as he could straight at him. Kevin dropped back and moved away to Parker’s left.

  Parker knew he wouldn’t have a lot of time to react. Paul wound up and hurled the ball at him.

  Parker panicked. He didn’t like it when anyone threw a ball at him, but Paul was the biggest guy in the class. If the ball hit him, it would hurt a lot. The moment the ball left Paul’s hand, Parker gave it a little push to the left with his mind.

  It worked—the ball was going nowhere near him, but time seemed to slow as he saw the horrible mistake he’d made. The ball was now flying straight toward Kevin’s head. Parker tried to give it a mental push in another direction, but it didn’t work, as if his ability had missed.

  Kevin wasn’t even going to try to dodge. His arms came up to protect his face, but at the last second, Parker pictured the ball collapsing.

  BANG!

  The ball popped and fell limply to the floor. The gym went silent. Everyone turned to look at Parker—everyone but Kevin, who was still bracing for impact. Paul turned to look at Parker in confusion.

  Parker stayed silent and tried to look as surprised as everyone else.

  The teacher came from the sidelines and picked up the flat ball, looking it over. He shrugged, then ran off the court and shouted, “Play ball!”

  Another student picked up a different ball, and Parker was actually relieved when he was hit by it.

  10

  “I’m not doing it anymore,” Parker said firmly. Yuan and Cole were sitting across from him at their lunch table. Drew was next to him and looked a little pained at Parker’s declaration. “I almost hurt someone else, and I may as well have told everyone in that gym what I can do.”

  “It was a mistake,” Drew said after Parker explained what happened. “It’s not like you were trying to deflect the ball toward Kevin.”

  Parker shook his head. “I don’t care. I’m done.” The whole incident had scared him. He’d gotten too comfortable with his ability. He’d thought he could control this power, but until now he hadn’t thought about the possibility that he could hurt himself or someone else without meaning to.

  “You’ve done a lot of good,” Yuan offered. “We were just talking about how some of the bullies have toned it down because of what you’ve done.”

  “Well, that’s all the good I’m going to do,” Parker said sullenly.

  “C’mon, man,” Cole said. “You can’t just stop. So you made a mistake. It’s not the end of the world. You just need a little more practice controlling your ability.”

  “I don’t want to control it,” Parker said a little louder than he intended to. “To be honest I don’t want it at all.”

  “Well, you’ve got it,” Cole said, taking a bite out of an apple. “So I think you should use it.”

  “You don’t get to decide that for me,” Parker said. “I decide what I do, and I’ve decided that I’m done. No more.”

  “Maybe if you—” Yuan began to say, but Parker cut her off.

  “No! I told you I’m not doing it anymore, so I’m not doing it anymore. That’s final.”

  “You kind of have to,” Drew piped up. “You’re the only person who can do it. If you don’t use . . . whatever this is, it’s like knowing who committed a crime and not turning them in.”

  “No, it’s not,” Parker shot back on reflex.

  “It kind of is,” Yuan said quietly. “Not using what you can do for good is irresponsible.”

  “You don’t understand what it’s like to be able to do this,” Parker practically shouted at his friends. “You didn’t almost get Kevin beaned in the head with a dodgeball.”

  “People get beaned with dodgeballs all the time,” Drew said, throwing his hands up in frustration.

  “Whatever. It’s never been my fault before.” Parker crossed his arms. “It doesn’t matter. I’ve decided.”

  “Well, you should re-decide,” Cole said.

  “Don’t tell me what to do.” Parker could feel his heart beating faster, anger boiling up.

  “It was one mistake,” Yuan said. “You don’t have to make such a big decision right away. Take some time to think about this.”

  The calm in her voice only made Parker even angrier. What right did she have to try to calm him down? She had no idea how he felt. None of them did.

  “No,” Parker snapped, standing up. His chair screeched behind him. “You guys don’t get a say in this. You’re not my sidekicks or whatever. I’ve been the one helping kids in school, while you guys just get to watch and laugh. But really, you do nothing. You think this is a game? This is my life!”

  All three stared up at him in shock. In the corners of his eyes, Parker even noticed a few kids from other tables staring at him.

  “Parker,” Yuan started, “we’re just trying to help.”

  “Well, don’t. I don’t care what you guys have to say about it. You aren’t a part of this—you never have been.”

  He knew the moment he said it that he didn’t really mean that, but it had come out already and he was still too angry to apologize. Drew and Cole said nothing, just looked down at the table.

  Yuan narrowed her eyes at him. “Fine. If that’s the way you feel.”

  “Fine.” Parker picked up his lunch tray and marched over to the empty table where he used to eat. He refused to even look at his friends for the rest of lunch.

  ***

  Everything went back to the way it had been before Parker discovered his ability. He walked the halls unnoticed by anyone. He ate alone at lunch, went to the theater after school, and did touch-ups on his props in the solitude of the workshop.

  It’s better this way, he thought. I didn’t have friends before, and I was just fine. I don’t need friends now. There’s nothing wrong with being a loner. Especially if they’re going to push me to do something I don’t want to do.

  He kept telling himself that, but he knew it wasn’t completely true. He missed hanging out with them. And there was a piece of him that wanted to call or text to apologize for getting so angry.

  With the play’s opening
night approaching, the cast started doing run-throughs of the show. In between scenes, Parker and the rest of the crew had to move set pieces around just as they would do during the performances. The actors waited offstage during scene changes, so Parker had to walk past them carrying props and furniture. He tried to avoid Yuan whenever possible.

  Parker noticed Yuan seemed to be quietly avoiding him too. She wasn’t harsh about it, but she somehow managed to find places to wait backstage that were always on the opposite side of where he was. Knowing that she was mad at him—or worse, disappointed in him—made him feel even more guilty.

  Two days before opening night, he stayed late after rehearsal to adjust the position of the door set piece onstage. By the time he’d finished and collected his backpack from the workshop, he was one of the only people left in the theater.

  But just as he was about to leave, he heard Caroline’s voice.

  “I’m just saying . . .” Caroline trailed after Ms. Frasier, who stood onstage jotting down notes on her clipboard. “I’m worried about the show.”

  The director paused at that. She turned back to Caroline and arched an eyebrow. “How so?”

  “I’m not trying to be mean.” Caroline widened her eyes, clasping her hands behind her. Parker rolled his eyes. “But I don’t think everyone’s performing at the same level. I just—I can’t help but notice that Yuan seems to be struggling with her character.”

  Parker couldn’t believe Caroline would stoop this low. Everyone in the production knew Yuan was doing an amazing job—just like everyone knew Caroline wasn’t really looking out for Yuan’s best interests.

  “We’re getting really close to opening night,” Caroline continued. “And I think it might help if a more experienced actor took over the lead role.”

  Ms. Frasier gave Caroline a long look. “Thank you for your concern, Caroline. I think Yuan is doing wonderfully. In fact, I’m excited to see her in more productions once this one ends.”

  Ms. Frasier turned to walk away, and Parker could see the look of panic break out across Caroline’s face. She darted in front of Ms. Frasier again.

  “It’s just—I’m having a difficult time in my scenes with her.” She flashed a shy smile that Parker could tell was entirely fake. “Again, I’m not trying to be mean. I’m just saying that I think the play could be a lot more successful if things were . . . different.” Caroline looked up at Ms. Frasier as if she’d just come up with a brilliant idea. “I know all the lines. I could easily take over.”

  Ms. Frasier gave her a look Parker had never seen before. “I don’t think that will be necessary,” she said firmly. “If you’re having trouble in the scenes with Yuan, you may consider that the problem is on your end.”

  Caroline’s jaw clenched, and her eyes narrowed at Ms. Frasier. “I’m not the problem.”

  “Well, everything I’ve seen from Yuan has been spectacular. Have a good night, Caroline.” Ms. Frasier gave Caroline a tight smile and walked away. The discussion was over, and Parker could see that Caroline was not happy with the result.

  He had a feeling this wasn’t going to be the end of it.

  ***

  The next day, Parker had stepped out of third period to go to the bathroom when he heard Caroline’s voice again. The hallways were empty, so her already loud voice carried easily. He slowed before he came around a corner, listening in.

  “She was practically encouraging her to come out for more roles, Jen,” Caroline groaned. “I cannot believe that girl might steal even more parts from me. This was supposed to be my theater!”

  Parker carefully peered around the wall. Caroline was leaning against a locker while Jennifer Kelly took a drink from the water fountain. What are they doing? he wondered. Just skipping class and hanging out? How often do they do this?

  “What are you going to do?” Jennifer asked.

  “I’m not losing any stage time to her.” She narrowed her eyes. “I’ve still got a couple of days to convince Ms. Frasier to give me the lead. If she doesn’t . . . I don’t want to do this, but it’ll be better for the play in the long run. Yuan may have to have an accident on opening night.”

  11

  “I thought you weren’t talking to us,” Cole said when Parker approached him and Drew in the hall after class.

  “It’s important,” Parker said.

  Drew looked a little more concerned than Cole. “What’s up?”

  “It’s Caroline. I heard her talking to Jennifer Kelly earlier today. She’s mad that Ms. Frasier thinks Yuan’s doing a good job, and I think she’s worried she’s going to lose more roles to her in the future.”

  “So?” Cole said, opening his locker and grabbing a textbook. “Caroline’s always been like that.”

  “I think she’s going to try to pull something on opening night.”

  “Something like what?” Drew said.

  “I don’t know. Something that could get Yuan hurt.”

  Drew and Cole’s jaws clenched at that. Parker watched as they shared a look before visibly pushing aside their concern.

  “What’s going on?” Yuan came up behind them. She didn’t bother to acknowledge that fact that Parker had avoided the three of them for the last few days.

  “I think Caroline’s gonna try to sabotage your performance on opening night.”

  Yuan’s mouth dropped slightly open in surprise. “Are you sure?”

  “I heard her say that she was planning to make sure you had some kind of ‘accident.’”

  They all stared at one another in silence for a moment.

  Then Yuan said, “Why don’t we talk about this over lunch?”

  “Assuming you don’t mind sitting with us again,” added Drew. Cole nodded agreement.

  Parker felt his face creep into a smile. “Yeah.” The bell rang. “I’ll see you guys there.”

  He kept his word. Instead of sitting alone, he ate with his friends that day. They avoided talking about his ability or anything related to it. It was like a little vacation from his worries. When Parker looked at the clock and saw there were only five minutes left of lunch, he blurted out, “I’m sorry I blew up at you guys the other day.”

  Drew shrugged. “We shouldn’t have pushed so hard, and you were right, we don’t know what it’s like to be able to do . . .” he paused, waving a hand in Parker’s direction, “that.”

  “We’re all sorry,” Yuan said. Cole nodded as she spoke.

  The conversation quickly shifted to Caroline and what she might be planning.

  “To be honest,” Yuan said, “I can’t really picture her trying to sabotage me. She’s always been the kind of person who has to get what she wants. But I have trouble believing that she’d actually do anything that would hurt a performance.”

  “I didn’t get the sense that she’s worried about this show,” Parker said. “I think she’s worried about the next one and the one after that. She doesn’t like the idea of competition for the lead roles.”

  “Yeah,” Drew said. “That sounds like her.”

  “Let’s see what we can find out and take it from there,” Cole suggested as the bell rang.

  For the rest of the day, Cole and Drew tried to find out if Caroline had anything planned, but it didn’t seem as if Caroline had confided in anyone else. Parker mentally reviewed everything Caroline had done during rehearsals. Aside from her usual passive-aggressive comments and a few snide remarks, he couldn’t think of anything suspicious.

  Opening night was tomorrow. Parker tried to imagine how Caroline might sabotage Yuan. She could steal or damage Yuan’s costume, tamper with her microphone . . . or try to physically hurt her. Parker pictured Caroline tripping Yuan onstage, or pushing her down the stairs. It seemed extreme, but it also seemed like the easiest way for Caroline to put Yuan out of commission.

  If she tries something like that, Parker thought, maybe I can use my ability to keep Yuan safe. But he didn’t know whether he was willing to use his ability again. He was still rattled from the d
odgeball incident, and he saw his power as dangerous now. What if he tried to help Yuan and instead ended up hurting her—or hurting someone else?

  But if something happened to Yuan and he did nothing to stop it, would he ever be able to forgive himself?

  12

  That afternoon, the cast had their last rehearsal before opening night. Parker was sitting offstage, watching a scene be repeated for what had to be the fifth or sixth time. Two of the actors had been flubbing their lines, so Ms. Frasier was having them run the scene again and again to drill it into their heads. Parker didn’t need to do anything for this scene, so he had to sit and watch until Ms. Frasier decided they knew the lines well enough.

  Most of the other actors had taken a seat in the audience while this went on. Yuan was out there quietly chatting with another actor. Parker decided to run back to the workshop and grab his phone out of his bag.

  When he reached the workshop, he noticed the door was slightly open—which was unusual because hardly anyone else ever went in there. Parker opened the door . . . and saw Caroline inside, looking through the toolbox.

  The door creaked as he pushed it all the way open. Caroline snapped upright and turned to face Parker. “Oh, hey.” She smoothed her face into a calm smile.

  “What are you doing in here?”

  Caroline’s eyes darted back and forth around the room. She cleared her throat. “I was just bored—looking around.”

  She had clearly been searching for something in here. Parker crossed his arms. “Can I help you find something?”

  “No,” she replied a little too quickly. “I’m not—I should probably get back out there.” She gave a fake smile again and scurried past him.

  Parker walked over to where she had been looking. The toolbox was kind of a mess, everything tossed in randomly. She could have easily taken something and Parker would have no way of knowing what it was.

  He looked back toward the door. He’d just seen something he wasn’t supposed to, something Caroline didn’t want him to know. He was sure of it.