Blood Haze

by L. R. Potter

  “What’s going on under here?” an amused voice said, from over her shoulder.

  She tensed and struggled to stifle the sob which threatened to spill from her lips. With the back of her hand, she again swiped against her cheek, spreading the dirt around.

  Lynx placed his hands lightly against the top of her shoulders. “Hey,” he murmured gently, “It can’t possibly be that bad.”

  She opened her mouth to respond, but tears clogged her throat. If he didn’t think she was an idiot before, he certainly would now. Her chest rose and fell quickly as she sucked in a breath, striving to calm herself.

  He turned her to face him. She struggled, but not wanting to make an even bigger spectacle of herself, she finally turned to face him. He looked down into her face and smiled gently. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a white-linen handkerchief and began to wipe at the dirt and tears. “Long night?” he asked quietly.

  “An awful one.”

  “What happened?” he asked, as he continued to swipe against her face.

  “I just… I was… I wanted…,” she stumbled over her words, trying to find something that would make sense without revealing the real source of her pain… or the real source of her confusion. Finally, she blurted out, “I forgot the words to my songs.”

  He stilled, then threw his head back and laughed. Shock at his reaction to her obvious distress, made her pause. Then, her lips began to twitch as the absurdness of her words hit her as well.

  Still smiling, he asked, indicating the open hood, “So… is this your take on sticking your head in the oven?”

  Inhaling deeply, her shoulders slumped. “No,” she mumbled, “my car won’t start.”

  His eyebrows drew together. “Do you know how to fix a car that won’t start?”

  She blew out the breath she’d just inhaled. “No.”

  As he’d done the night before, he brushed her hair away from her face and pushed it over her shoulder. “So, what are you doing, then?”

  The velvetiness of his voice washed over her. She struggled to remember the course of their conversation as she breathed him in. She stared up into his deep eyes for a long moment before giving a simple shrug of her shoulder. Oddly, she immediately began to feel calmer.

  “Well… it’s good for you, I do know how to take care of this,” he said as he stared down deeply into her eyes.

  Unable to look away, she said. “You do?”

  “Uh huh. Tonight, I’ll take you home, then tomorrow, I get my guy to come over and take a look at it,” he replied softly, as he gently traced the curve of her face.

  She blinked as she took in his words. She gave a small shake of her head to try and clear her jumbled thoughts. “Your guy? No, please I don’t want to be an inconvenience. I can…” she began before he cut her off.

  Arabella shivered as that same warm flush stole through her body. She saw Lynx stiffened as if he sensed her intense arousal. “It’s not an inconvenience. I insist,” he replied in his lilted voice.

  She stared up into his sultry eyes and couldn’t think of one reason to continue to resist him. “Thank you. I’d appreciate a lift home.”

  As they drove, he saw her shiver next to him. He sensed her nervousness. He liked her nervousness. He also sensed her sadness. He didn’t like that at all. He wondered what’d happened to her since he’d seen her last. He wished he could read her mind. But all his animalistic senses could pick up was the anxiousness and her attempt to hide it. She sat with her shoulders straight, looking forward through the windshield at the passing scenery… what little she could see of it.

  He felt a flutter of excitement rush through him. He wanted this woman and he would have her. She wouldn’t be able to resist him indefinitely. He longed to see her without clothes… for two reasons. One, was for the obvious – she was a very beautiful woman; the other, was to determine how often she’d been fed upon and when she could be feed from again. He planned on taking her body, then drinking her scorching-hot blood. It annoyed him to think of others who’d had the privilege. But working in a club like the Night Owl with many of its patrons being vampires, he didn’t see how she’d not been fed from many times. He wondered if she’d enjoyed it? Could she feel the rush of her blood leaving her body? Did the tingle of it zip through her? The thought made him hard. He shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

  He’d never know whether she’d enjoyed it or not, sadly, because undoubtedly, her mind would have been hazed after each time. He’d have to be sure to ask her before he hazed her which would wipe her memory of the feeding.

  “Are you warm enough?” he asked her.

  She tensed as he spoke. “It’s a little cool,” she replied.

  “You can adjust the air to whatever you’d like,” he said.

  He watched as she fiddled with the heating controls and turned the vents toward herself.

  “How long have you worked at the Night Owl?” he asked.

  “About six months,” she replied.

  Watching her as she clasped her hands in her lap, he asked, “How long have you been a singer?”

  A sad expression darted across her face. “All my life. My mom was a singer on Broadway. She had a beautiful voice,” she replied.

  “Had a beautiful voice? She no longer sings?” he asked.

  She glanced down at her hands and he could feel the sadness roll off her in waves. “No, she was killed a while ago.”

  “I’m sorry, “he murmured, and strangely he was. “How did she die, if you don’t mind me asking?”

  He sensed her unease. “I… I’d really rather not talk about it,” she replied, glancing quickly out the side window.

  “Of course. Please excuse my rudeness. It was thoughtless of me,” he said silkily.

  Silence stretched between them before she cleared her throat and asked, “What do you do for a living?”

  He smiled in the darkness. Humans were so predictable. Every human female he’d ever been with had asked that question. When would they learn that money wasn’t everything?

  He gave her the answer he’d perfected over the years. “I dabble in a little bit of everything… stocks, money-market, and import/export. Of course, having family money helps as well,” he said flashing her a huge grin. He hardened even further when he heard her sharp intake of air. She found him attractive… they always did. His lips curved into a satisfied grin. But it faded as he realized he was a little disappointed the challenge was gone. He’d been looking forward to breaking down her defenses. Oh well, he’d still enjoy his evening… he’d make sure of it.

  Arabella shivered as a rush of warmth flirted over her skin. What was wrong with her? She wanted him. But how could that possibly be? She didn’t fawn over men. The fact was, she’d only ever been with one man in her life, and that was Drew… and he’d just broken up with her. She really needed to get a grip.

  This man, for all intent and purpose, was her boss. But it seemed no matter how hard and how many times she berated herself, she still struggled to contain her scattered emotions. Just the mere sight of his fingers on the steering wheel had her wondering how they’d feel running over her skin. She shivered. She really needed to pull it together. Wasn’t there supposed to be some kind of mourning period or something when your boyfriend dumped you? Anger flashed red-hot within her. Stupid Drew! She found she liked the anger way better than the lost feelings she’d had since Drew had called her.

  So lost in her mixed-up thoughts, she nearly missed his question. “What happened at the club last night? Jealous girlfriend?”

  She glanced away before answering softly, “I… I guess.”

  They drove in silence for a few minutes, then he asked, “Do you have any other family?”

  She swallowed to try and add moisture to her dry mouth. “There’s only me and Ian, my brother.”

  He nodded thoughtfully. “So… both parents are passed? I’m sorry to hear that.”

  Uncomfortable with talking about her parents’ demise, she shifted
the conversation back to him. “What about you? Are there any other Rogan’s roaming around?”

  He smiled at her again. “My parents reside on our estate on the coast of Cape Horn. Beside Karmyl and myself, I have two brothers, Nicolas and Talon – Nicolas is married to a wonderful girl, Felicia. I, also, have two other half-sisters, Selena and Tara. Now that I’m back, we all currently live at Night Shade. Fortunately for us, the estate is big enough where we don’t have to see one another if we don’t so choose,” he said.

  Almost unable to resist asking, she said, “A wife? Children?”

  He shook his head. “No, neither. You?” While he asked the question, he’d have no qualms in taking what he wanted from this woman. But somewhere down deep, he hoped she wasn’t married. He didn’t like the thought of it.

  A sharp twinge pinched within her chest. Slowly she shook her head. “No, I’ve never been married.”

  “Why?” he asked.

  “Different reasons,” she replied simply, unwilling to admit she’d never been asked.

  He eyed her for several long moments before saying, “He’s a fool.”

  She blushed at his words.

  She directed him to her house. When he made to get out of the car, she laid a restraining hand on his arm. “There’s no need to see me in. I’ve put you out enough,” she said quickly.

  “Don’t be silly. Of course a gentleman sees a woman to her door. What would Karmyl say?” he replied.

  Exhaling silently, she waited until he walked around to her side of the sedan to open her door. In true gentlemanly fashion, Lynx placed a hand against the small of her back. His cool touch felt so intimate. She felt her blood stir at his touch. Get a grip, she told her again.

  He grinned at her internal struggle. She’d do well never to play poker because she could not hide her emotions very well. He felt her shiver beneath his hand. It wouldn’t be long now and she’d be shivering for totally different reasons.

  They reached her front door, and he stood patiently as she fumbled to find her keys in her small handbag. He found her nervousness enticing. He could smell her blood as it simmered within her veins. He wanted this woman as he’d never wanted a woman before. He watched the vein in her neck as it jumped nervously. He licked his lips in anticipation of placing them over that exact spot. He was happy to not see any telltale signs of any prior bites on her neck. Wherever she’d been bitten before, it wasn’t there.

  When she finally found her keys, he reached around to take them from her trembling fingers. “Allow me,” he said.

  She held her breath so he couldn’t see how rapidly her chest was heaving from being in such close proximity to him. He unlocked and pushed the door open. She walked in quickly and turned to face him. He leaned negligently against the doorframe.

  “Thanks for the ride home. I appreciate it. I hope to see you at the club sometime,” she said, as she wrung her hands together.

  He cocked his head to one side and arched his finely shaped eyebrows. “Aren’t you going to invite me in, Arabella?” he asked softly.

  She swallowed at the velvety softness of his voice. “I… I…” she began.

  He moved swiftly toward her and grasped her face within his cool palms. He angled his lips against hers and kissed her softly. Her body jolted at the contact and something shifted in her chest. He urged her to open her lips to his tongue and as he eased into her mouth, he eased his hands down her arms then down to encircle her waist to bring her body closer to his. He could feel her heart pounding against his granite chest. She inhaled sharply and moaned as fire seemed to ignite in her veins. It felt… she felt… whole, as if all the pieces of her had finally come together. Her scattered senses overruled her ability to think straight.

  While her mind was conflicted, her body seemed perfectly clear on what it wanted. Allowing her purse to fall from her unresisting fingers, she clutched at the material of his shirt and pulled him even tighter against her body. Every sensory point on her body burned for his touch. He moved one hand up and down the creamy white skin of her back exposed by her low-cut dress, and growled his need to her. He allowed his hands to drift down to her bottom and pulled her even closer to his arousal. She whimpered in her need and lifted her hands to bury them in his silky dark hair. Their tongues mated and she struggled to breath.

  As she breathed him in, she became almost desperate. She moved her hands beneath his shirt and began running them up against his bare back; her movements frantic and uncoordinated. He chuckled and kicked the door closed with his foot before plunging his tongue over and over into her mouth making her imagine him doing that to other places on her body. He walked her backwards and pulled her down on the couch, onto his lap. She pulled her hands out from beneath his shirt and began to unbutton it – nearly tearing the buttons off in her frantic haste.

  He reached behind her and slowly slid the zipper down the back of her dress. She shuddered when his cool hands moved up to ease the top of her dress and camisole down. He gently laid her down on the couch and looked down her torso. He glanced at the junction of both elbows but again didn’t see any signs of being fed upon. Moving his eyes back up her body, he was the one who was mesmerized. Her body was… perfect. Her creamy breasts lay encased in a sheer lacy bra. Unable to help himself, he lowered his lips to capture one of the rosy tips through the fabric into his mouth.

  She gasped and stilled before beginning to struggle against him. His intimate touch seemed to snap her out of the sensual fog she’d been in. The images from her glimpsing flooded her mind. Oh, my God! She was the woman. It was her… not Drew. What had she done? What was she doing? As unbelievably hard as it was, she shoved away from him and gathered her dress in one hand and clutched it up against her chest. Shame caused her face to flush. She scrambled off the couch and put the arm of it between them. “I’m sorry,” she said shivering. “But I can't do this. I don’t know what came over me. Please forgive me,” she said on a whisper, her vividly blue eyes wide and more focused.

  Once again he tilted his head as he stared at her curiously. He struggled to understand this turn of events. How had she broken the sensual gaze he’d had over her? His body was in an agony of need. He knew he could simply throw her down and take what he wanted. She’d be no wiser once he hazed her anyway. But he hesitated. He liked the thrill of the chase. No, he’d let this play out her way… for a little while anyway. He was going to have her – but apparently not tonight.

  He stood and lifted a hand slowly to cup her cheek. She closed her eyes at the contact. “Arabella,” he purred. “There is nothing to forgive. Another time and another place, perhaps,” he said smoothly.

  She couldn’t meet his eyes as mortification of what she’d nearly done weighed like a stone in her chest. She shook her head, “I can’t do this. This isn’t who I am,” she replied. “No matter how it might seem. I don’t do one-night stands… or casual relationships. I’m… with someone…” she began before pain slashed at her heart at remembering that wasn’t true anymore. Her lips trembled at the torrent of wild, confusing emotions coursing through her body. It took her a moment to take in his words.

  “Oh, Arabella,” he said with a small smile on his lips as he shook his head. “This is going to happen. For now, I’m willing to let you set the pace. But you will be mine,” he promised.

  She inhaled deeply at his words. Deep sensual heat flooded her body at his words, making her clench her thighs to ward off the need. She lifted uncertain eyes to his. Once more, he raised a hand to lightly brush his knuckles against her cheekbone. “Good night. Pleasant dreams,” he said before moving to the door. As he stepped through the doorway, he turned. “Be sure to lock up, Arabella. There’s no telling what kinds of monsters are lurking out there,” he said, with a gravelly laugh.

  She stood motionless for a long time after the door was closed. Finally, still clutching her dress against her chest, she sank down onto the couch. Her stomach roiled at what she’d nearly done. She’d allowed a man she bar
ely knew to kiss and touch her so intimately. Shame rolled over her in waves as she realized she hoped what he said was true… that she would be his. She wanted to be… needed to be. Her traitorous body shivered in anticipation of being taken by him.

  Tears slid down her cheeks. And sadly, she knew the tears were more filled with regret than with disgrace. Her body still churned with unfulfilled, desirous need. Swallowing hard and with a heavy heart, she knew she’d have to quit singing at the Night Owl. She couldn’t do this. She didn’t know what life had in store for her… maybe by tomorrow, Drew would have changed his mind and have decided he wanted her back… but what if he didn’t.

  She shouldn’t have been so surprised that Drew had finally had enough. They’d been through so much together. And it seemed, no matter what she’d thrown at him, he’d always stayed by her side – through her father’s suicide; through the beginning stages of her glimpsings - when she thought she’d been losing her mind; and then finally, when her mother had been brutally murdered. No, she’d just not see Lynx Rogan ever again. It was the only way. She had to give Drew a chance – either way.

  She didn’t try to stifle the sob which rose from deep down. Heartache made her chest burn. She cried for the loss of a love of a lifetime and for the loss of whatever she might have experienced with Lynx Rogan. Why was this so hard? She’d only seen the man twice. There was just something about him – some pull that seemed to draw her to him. It was like he was the Master and she was his puppet. He made her feel things, she’d never felt before. She’d found the very things with him that she’d been missing from her relationship with Drew.

  With a definitive shake of her head, she swiped roughly at the tears on her cheeks. No! She was going to stop this. She was not some stupid little teenager. She was a grown woman with responsibilities. She was in control, not her body. She declared to herself that she’d do better from now on. She’d not allow anything or anyone to come between her and what she knew to be right.

  With as much resolve as she could muster, she stood and allowed the little, black dress to fall to the floor at her feet. Stepping out of it, she left it where it laid crumpled on the carpeted floor, before snagging a bottled water from the kitchen. Kicking off her high-heels, she walked numbly to her bathroom and grabbed two sleep-aid tablets and took them quickly. She didn’t want to lie in bed and think about this anymore… or dream. She wanted to have nothing… just blank nothingness.