Blood Haze

by L. R. Potter

  “The woman, Lynx. The brown- haired woman. You were in the car with her. I saw it, Lynx… I saw you with her,” she cried.

  His face became an impassive mask. “What did you see exactly?” he asked softly.

  The threatening tears won their victory over her control and began to streak down her face. “You were in the car with her and you… you were kissing her.” She dropped her suitcase from her uncoordinated fingers. “Tell me it’s not true,” she begged as she slumped to her knees on the carpeted floor.

  His chest burned with the need to relieve her mind of what she thought. He knew how much this hurt her, could see it with his own eyes. But this was better for her to believe, than knowing the truth would be. He’d known his way of life, and those involved in his world, would end up destroying her. When he’d walked up on Talon with his lips on her neck, he’d nearly lost it. He didn’t want this for her. This wasn’t her world. She needed to get back to her life, while she still could.

  He swallowed and cleared his throat before looking away from her. “I’m sorry, I can’t do that. I was with her yesterday,” he said softly.

  “Oh, my God. Oh, my God,” she whimpered as she pressed her fist to her lips. She struggled to her feet and launched herself at him. “You, bastard! You, damned bastard. Why? Why would you do that? You promised me! You promised me it would be only you and me, exclusively.” She pummeled him with her fist and he didn’t put up a fight. Slipping back to the floor, she buried her face in her hands as she wept. “I don’t understand why. I don’t understand how you could do this to me,” she sobbed.

  With his heart twisting painfully in his chest, he rose from the bed. “I never meant to hurt you, Arabella. Go back to your own life. You’ll never fit into mine. I think that’s what’s best for everyone. Please see yourself out,” he replied emotionlessly, as he walked quietly from the room, leaving her in a puddle on the floor. She finally struggled to her feet and as quickly as she could, she made her way to her car.

  She didn’t remember the drive to her house. She only remembered blinking back into consciousness and sitting in front of the garage. She hadn’t known how long she’d been sitting there. How would she survive this? The pain was just too much. Just that morning, she’d been happy… she’d been in love… her body had been worshipped by his. Why? She asked herself again. Why would he do this? Was there some failing on her part? Were all his words a lie?

  Shutting the car off, she crawled out of the car and shuffled toward her home. It felt cold and desolate to her now. She missed him already. How was she supposed to live without a heart in her chest? She’d left her heart back in Lynx’s hands at Night Shade.

  Later that night as she lay in bed staring up at the ceiling, pain lashing at her insides, his words cut into her over and over… go back to your own life, you’ll never fit into mine.

  Chapter 12

  It’d been a long two weeks. Two weeks of limitless nothingness. She’d cried herself out during the first week. From there she’d moved into the blessed land of sheer numbness. She was glad her body had shut-down. She couldn’t stand the pain any longer. Sometimes, she wished for the scotching heat anger would bring, but she couldn’t find it. Instead, she seemed to wander through her days, not eating, not sleeping, not doing anything. She knew she needed to work, but just couldn’t make herself answer or return the calls.

  Drew called several times throughout the first week, but she didn’t answer when he called. Of the Rogans, she not heard one word. Not from Karmyl, and certainly not from Lynx. She’d picked up the phone a thousand times, had even dialed his number, but each time, she stopped herself. Sadly, the reason wasn’t because of the betrayal; it was because she couldn’t handle the rejection… go back to your own life, you’ll never fit into mine.

  It was now Saturday morning and she was standing in front of the bathroom sink brushing her teeth. She glanced up in the mirror and her reflection horrified her. Her hair was flat and lifeless. There were dark circles under her eyes. It was apparent she’d lost weight. She was dying inside. She let her toothbrush fall to the sink. She gripped the sink’s edge with both hands. She had to pull herself together. She had to try and build a new life for herself… or she had to end it. The latter appealed more to her than the struggle of having to live again. The black hole that held her threatened to suck her down so far she’d never find her way back. Her losses of late outweighed her gains.

  She splashed cold water on her face, hoping to revive herself, but still she felt nothing. She had to figure out some way to move past this. The problem was, it felt as if part of her soul was missing. He’d been her other half. She didn’t know how to make it. She didn’t know who she was now. Drawing in an unsteady breath, she shuffled into her bedroom and grabbed her cellphone. Quickly, before she lost her nerve, she dialed a number she’d been determined never to call again. The phone rang twice before being answered. “Hello?”

  “Drew? It’s… it’s me,” she said shakily.

  “Oh, God! Arabella! I can’t believe you called. I thought you’d never call. Can I see you?” he said quickly.

  “Drew… I could really use a friend, right now. Can you do that?” she asked dully.

  Silence met her words and she waited for the hammer of rejection to be lowered once again. “We’ve always been friends, Ara. No matter what, it’s been you and me. I just got my casts off yesterday. Can we meet somewhere?”

  She swallowed at the tide of emotions his acceptance of her brought. “I’d like that,” she said softly. “I’d really like that.”

  They agreed to meet at a local Mexican restaurant at noon. She had to try on numerous outfits just to find something that fit. She arrived a few minutes late. She found Drew, dressed casually in jeans and a white, long-sleeved dress-shirt, left untucked. He looked good… familiar. Her heart caught when she saw him. She’d missed him, missed his friendship. Tears threatened when he hugged her and she struggled to rein them in.

  He held her tight when her body began to tremble. “God, Ara,” he mumbled against her ear. “I’ve missed you so much.”

  “I’ve missed you too.”

  He pulled back and led her into the restaurant. Once they were seated and had placed their drink order, he studied her face. “I’ve got to say… you look… terrible,” he said with a grin.

  She gave him a small smile. “It’s been a little rough,” she admitted. “You, on the other hand, look great.”

  He smiled at her. “It’s been a tough time for me as well, but I think things are turning around. I went back to work this week, even though the casts weren’t off. That was difficult, what with the bulk of my work being done on the computer,” he said with a laugh, as he mimicked a show of punching computer keys with the hunt-and-peck method.

  She smiled easily this time. This felt good… normal. Maybe she could move forward. Not with Drew, no, she knew now that she didn’t love him like that, but maybe she could move forward with her life. It was at that point she knew she needed to move away from this place. Start someplace new and fresh.

  “So what are your plans for the rest of the day,” he asked as he shoveled most of the food she’d left on her plate onto his own. It was obvious, his appetite hadn’t been affected.

  “I don’t know. I really need to go through Ian’s things from his apartment. Decide what to keep and what to get rid of.”

  “Why don’t I come help you with that?” he said.

  “Really? You’d do that?”

  “Of course. I’d do anything for you. You know that,” he replied easily.

  She watched the ice in her glass as the cubes swam around her glass of water. “Drew… it can’t be what it was before,” she said softly.

  He hesitated, in his inhalation of the food. “What?”

  “I don’t feel that way about you anymore. I’ve moved past it. And be honest, it never was what it should have been. You knew that. It just took me longer to figure it out. You deserve someone who can love y
ou the right way.”

  He eyed her intently for several long minutes. “And what if I think you’re wrong?”

  Slowly, she shook her head. “That’s over, Drew. We both know it. But I really want us to be friends. We were really great friends once. I think we could be again.”

  He set his fork down carefully. “Friends?”

  She nodded.

  “I love you, Ara!” he said intently.

  “I know you do and I love you. Just not in that way.”

  “I don’t know if I can do that, Ara,” he eventually said.

  She closed her eyes. She desperately needed a friend, but it was now apparent, it couldn’t be Drew. There was no going back, she guessed. “Well, you think it over and let me know. Okay?” she said as she rose from the booth, placing enough money on the table for her part of the bill.

  “I’ve got it!” he snapped, clearly frustrated by the turn of events.

  “I miss you, Drew. Truly, I do.” With that, she walked out of the restaurant as a hundred different emotions filled her.

  Once she arrived back home, she immediately set out to do what she’d told him she was going to do – sort Ian’s things. She plugged her Ipod into the speakers and turned the volume up loud. Then, she pulled one box after the other into the living room and began a pile of things to keep and things to toss. It was very bittersweet; bitter at Ian’s loss, and sweet because she was finally doing something productive.

  As the house darkened, it surprised her at how quickly the afternoon had gone by. She glanced at the few remaining boxes in Ian’s room. She told herself she‘d do one more box today, then finish up tomorrow. One task completed. She felt good… almost human again. She dragged the last box out and began to go through the papers which had been crammed in the built-in desk at this apartment.

  There were different types of bills: electric; water; insurance; and his gym membership. She found several notes her mother must have left for him before she died. Usually, they were nothing but instructions on what temperature to wash certain clothes, or a recipe of some kind. It tugged at her heart to see her mother’s handwriting. She missed her so damned much! She held the paper up to her nose and tried to inhale her fragrance, but no scent lingered. Sighing heavily, and stretching to remove the ache in her back, she stared defiantly at the papers in the bottom of the box. She considered tossing it all in the trash, but pushed on through her sorting.

  She’d gotten to the very bottom of the box and after coming across an old flyer of a missing cat, she stilled. There in the bottom of the box was an envelope, written in her mother’s handwriting, with her name scrawled across it. With hands that trembled for some reason, she fished the envelope out and traced Arabella with her forefinger. Why would Ian have this?

  Taking a deep breath, she tore the envelope open and read the last words her mother had left for her.

  Arabella,

  You have always been such a bright, shining star in my life. You were the only person who truly, truly knew what this gift/curse meant. Of all the things I wish I could have given you, this ‘gift’ wasn’t ever one of them. Selfishly, I’ve been happy to have someone share in it with me.

  If you’re reading this letter, then everything I’ve tried to do has failed and both Ian and I are now gone. I’m so sorry, my beautiful Arabella, that you will have to face the evils out there alone. And make no mistake, there is evil out there. It lingers in the air and pounces when you least expect it… and I was expecting it. I’d seen it coming, long before it came. I tried to stop this chain of events, tried to keep everyone safe, but apparently, I’ve failed.

  Be careful of who you trust… and who you love. Things aren’t always as they appear. There are things in this world you aren’t aware of yet, but the time is coming when it will be revealed. I discovered these things at Night Shade. Stay away from there, it is filled with evil. My prayer is that you find this letter before you stray onto those grounds. I’ve seen things from there, my killer lives within its walls. Promise me, you’ll never cross its threshold.

  That being said, there is one who is not the same as the others. If you find him - trust him, he will save you. He is the only one who can. Be safe, my darling girl. Be strong. I’m with you every day in your heart.

  I love you, Mom

  She didn’t know how long she sat there with the letter grasped within her hands. What did her mother have to do with Night Shade? What did she mean, her killer lived within its walls? Could Lynx have had something to do with her death? She huffed in frustration, she wished her mother would have just told her what had happened. No, it couldn’t have been Lynx. There was no way, he’d be a killer. A jerk, maybe, but not a killer. While she couldn’t see Lynx being a killer, she could certainly see Nicolas Rogan being one. But why would he kill her mother? Well, there was one way to find out. She’d go and confront them.

  Rising quickly before she lost her nerve, she gathered her purse, cellphone, and keys and headed out to her car. She sat for a moment. What if something happened to her while she was at Night Shade? Who’d even miss her? She scoffed at the notion. Jamming the car into reverse, she drove through the darkened streets thinking about her mother’s note. It’d been so cryptic. She didn’t understand it at all. Evil? What evil was there? She’d find out soon enough!

  She was surprised to see Night Shade lit up brightly and vehicles lining the drive. She had to park way down the lane. Where they having a party of some kind? She got out of her car and wavered momentarily. What if Lynx was with someone else? Could she really endure that? She shook off the thought. This wasn’t about them, it was about her mother and finding the truth.

  She had to walk about a quarter mile up the lane to finally reach the house. It seemed that almost everyone from town had been invited to this party. Everyone with the exception of her. What did she expect? She moved to the front door and wiped her sweaty hands against her thighs. Here goes nothing, she thought.

  Quietly at first, then harder, she tapped the antique knocker against its metal plate. When she got no answer, she tried again. Again, no answer. Anger began to build up inside her. It heated parts of her that had been dormant for weeks. A quiver of nerves almost had her turning around, but instead, she grasped the doorknob in her hand and twisted. The door opened with a heavy creak.

  She walked in slowly. The house was silent, eerily so. She stood still and listened intently to where the big crowd of people could be, but still she heard nothing. She stepped forward and almost called out, but suddenly shut her mouth. She placed a foot on the bottom step of the staircase, but hesitated. Where could they be?

  She remembered the dining room where she’d eaten breakfast. It would have been big enough to hold a large number of people. She began making her way in that direction. The double-doors to the dining room were closed. She wrapped both hands around the doorknobs and twisted. She blinked against the black-spots which appeared in front of her eyes. Weird images began to appear. People dressed up in long dresses and black-tie tuxedos. They were masked, laughing and dancing around the room, as music swirled around them. She shook her head and swiped at the small trickle of blood under her nose. She couldn’t do this. She didn’t want this.

  She pushed the doors opened expecting to see people circling the dance floor. Instead of the happy gaiety she’d expected, she saw death. Piles and piles of it. Involuntarily, she opened her mouth and screamed. Fear flooded her body making her immobile. She glanced around frantically, begging for someone to explain the broadband of destruction. But there was no one left alive. Her legs gave out underneath her and she crumpled among the bodies, at least a hundred of them. She knew she should back out of the room and run, but she couldn’t move. Her heart pounded as her eyes took in the morbid scene around her. “God, oh God!” she whimpered over and over.

  To her left, a door opened suddenly and Nicolas Rogan appeared. He was dressed as the others in tuxedo and black-tie. He seemed to be searching for something and then his lips curl
ed cruelly when his eyes fell on her.

  He slowly shook his head. “I almost didn’t recognize you the day we met. My apologies for that. You won’t remember, but we’ve met before. The day your mother died.”

  “It was you?” she whimpered.

  He straightened his jacket and walked closer to her. “It was me, what?” he asked.

  “You… you killed my mother?”

  He gave a dismissive shake of his head. “She was going to expose us. I couldn’t allow that!”

  “You’re… you’re a monster,” she gasped.

  He smiled evilly. “I am, am I? Well, let’s just see who you consider the real monster.”

  He snatched her arm cruelly and forced her up with her arm shoved up behind her. Fear caused her legs to feel like noodles and she struggled to remain upright. He propelled her forward nearly effortlessly. He forced her up the marble staircase. Was he taking her to Lynx? Please dear God, let that be the case. Lynx would save her from this monster… wouldn’t he? Maybe he’d known all along about her mother… maybe, he’d been part of it.

  She shook her head trying to understand what was happening. What had happened to all those people? She swallowed hard against the bile which rose up in her throat.

  “Are you ready for the show, Arabella?” he asked when they’d reached Lynx’s bedroom door.

  Suddenly she was more afraid than ever. She didn’t want to know what was behind the door. She didn’t want to know because Nicolas wanted her to know. She began to whimper and try to back away. “No, please, no,” she begged.

  But Nicolas was surprisingly strong and without warning, he threw open the door and shoved her inside so hard, it forced her to her knees. She scrambled to her feet and searched about the room. She finally saw what Nicolas had been wanting her to see.

  Lynx was on the bed with a woman. And while they were fully clothed, Lynx had his teeth sunk deeply within the woman’s neck as he sucked viciously as the woman whimpered and cried. She could hear him growl against the woman’s neck… like an animal! Her knees buckled once more and she fell hard on her knees. She stared wide-eyed. The monster on the bed bore little resemblance to the man she’d fallen in love with. He seemed to finally notice her and focused his eyes on hers. Still lost in his feeding frenzy, he growled at her, too. He allowed his teeth to unlatch, and the woman fell to the bed.