Caspers Ghosts

by Victoria Hyder

  He sauntered over, hands in his pocket and a blank expression on his face as he turned his bored eyes from me to the counter assistant, “What?” he asked.

  “Drinks, snacks, dessert or the illusion of popcorn?”

  He pretended to think, clicking his tongue in a way I knew he was baiting me like I was baiting him. The clerk looked between the two of us and sighed. “Well I prefer my illusions salted, if you don’t mind,” he smirked. I placed the order and tried not to think about how much of an arse Casper appeared to other people. I knew a lot of people wondered why I even put up with working with him, but once you got past the blank masks and the dry humour, it was oddly comforting knowing he was there. Or perhaps that was just me. Once everything was handed to me and I pocketed the tickets, I went along to join Casper so that we could go in to the screen.

  The movie itself was everything I could want in an animation movie; funny, moving, inspiring and all the while I couldn’t help but let my mind drift to what Casper’s animation would look like when it was completed. I felt on edge the entire time, as though I was hyper aware that at any moment, I could brush against Casper’s leg and render the entire evening pointless. Thankfully, my only mishap had been bumping my knee against his when we stood up. He’d tensed for a split second, then carried on as though nothing had happened. He’d been doing that a lot lately.

  It was around ten by the time we made it back to Campus but I still felt quite awake and alert. Even Casper seemed in a lighter mood as we made our way up the stairs side-by-side. He left the door open so I could slip in behind him. He didn’t seem offended that I was hanging around a little longer. I hung my coat over the back of his desk chair and sat down while he ducked straight into the bathroom. I frowned at it and started drumming a rhythm on my knee, taking in the complete series of ‘Doctor Who’ and ‘The Big Bang Theory’ staring up at me from the bottom shelf. The door to the bathroom clicked open.

  “You know whenever you have a day off we should just crash out in your room and have a Doctor Who marathon.”

  He gave a dry little laugh, “Well I can always make time, so when you’re free we can watch.”

  I blinked, surprised. “You wouldn’t mind spending … However many hours with me?”

  “I survived tonight didn’t I?” I snorted and rolled my eyes, swinging myself around in his chair. “Thanks for tonight,” he murmured, his eyes dropping down to his lap.

  “What do you mean?”

  “I haven’t been out on Valentine’s Day –or well, around Valentine’s Day –for such a long time. You made it sort of … painless.”

  Despite wanting to ask what he meant, I smiled softly. “You’re welcome,” was the only response I could give. I wanted to reach out and comfort him. I cocked my head towards the bookshelf in a vain attempt to lighten the mood, “Fancy watching some episodes now?”

  It had been ages since I’d watched any of my own box-sets. Isabel wasn’t really into any of the ones I liked. She tolerated ‘Scrubs’ but not enough to watch it continuously. Peering up at me through his thick fringe, Casper smirked before nodding his head towards the door, “Change into something more comfortable.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “You’re literally five doors down. Just go and change and I’ll set up.” I stood up and made for the door. Before I ducked into the hallway, Casper’s voice stalled my steps, “Oh and by the way, if you think we’re going to skip any bad episodes, you are sorely mistaken.” He cocked an eyebrow, challenging me to object.

  I snickered, “Don’t worry. I shall suffer with you.”

  “Silently, I should hope!” he called after me as I slipped out of his room.

  I changed quickly before hurrying back to his room. As soon as I was let in, I claimed the desk chair and folded my arms with my grin firmly in place as he finished setting up his TV. As soon as the screen flared with colour, Casper edged back so that he was sitting up on the end of his bed, hunched forward on his knees as though the loading screen was the most fascinating thing ever. I grinned a little wider at the angle of his face –one I’d rarely seen where he wasn’t hiding behind his fringe. He really was beautiful, in a dark, sentient sort of way.

  “The Doctor isn’t about to pop out of my mouth, you know,” he stated dryly, his eyes barely moving.

  “Huh?”

  He rolled his eyes lazily to look at me before cocking his head. “Don’t play dumb. You’re staring at me again. Do I have something on my face that’s so interesting to you?”

  I held his smouldering grey gaze for a few heartbeats. My mouth felt dry as I breathed a soft, “Yes –you do.”

  He stared for a moment before pressing ‘PLAY’. The theme music starting to build up through the room and as the colours danced and swirled in the screen, I found my heart drumming in my chest as I tried to keep my gaze focused on the TV and not let it stray to Casper.

  If I had known that a sure-fire way bonding with Casper was to hole up in his room and watch the entire first series of 2005 Doctor Who, I would’ve considered doing it back at the start of January. He laughed, gripped his hands into tight fists whenever the dramatic music flared, and had a very amusing commentary for when something obvious should have happened to prevent unwanted doom. After two and a half hours I couldn’t tell if I was laughing more at the Doctor’s antics, or Casper was. I didn’t remember getting tired. In fact the next thing I remembered was the climax of the first season and had a sketchy memory of a weight on my forearm and then falling face-down into some soft blankets. I vaguely remembered glimpses of Casper sitting in the chair I’d previously occupied, a feeling of him tucking me further under the throw blankets he’d draped over me and the sensation of the mattress eventually dipping under the presence of another weight. The blackness resumed almost instantly afterwards.

  Chapter Fifteen

  The bed I was sleeping in was soft and comforting, like the warmest hug I’d ever experienced. No matter which way I’d turned in the sheets, I was nothing but warm, comfortable, infused with calm and floating as though I were weightless.

  It was just gone dawn when I woke up in Casper’s bed; the bleak light made some of the furniture stand out through the gloom. The pillow was cradling my head like two perfect hands, and the mattress seemed to mould to my body. The gloom clouded through my mind and I sighed softly, settling back on my side and nuzzling down into the pillow.

  I peeled my eyelids open, letting them adjust to the light and the shock of black hair tickling at my nose. I wrinkled it and blinked, leaning away from the messy mop of dark hair. I’d been so consumed by my dreamless sleep that I hadn’t realised I’d gravitated towards Casper’s body heat. I wanted to reach out and draw the heat against my chest, cuddle it and let it wash over me. Instead, I tried to wriggle away a few inches without shifting the mattress too much. He didn’t stir and the steady sound of his breathing didn’t change. This was foreign territory; I didn’t know what Casper was like in the morning. I didn’t know if he was grumpy, or rude, or lashed out at things. I didn’t know how long it took for him to charge up to his usual, dry-humoured self.

  I gripped the blanket tighter, barely daring to breathe as I watched Casper curled underneath the duvet. ‘He could have just told me to leave’, a voice murmured at the back my head. ‘He could have just woken up and thrown me out.’

  He stretched out and grunted a little, tugging the duvet tighter over his shoulder and neck. He smelled soft, cool and tinted with lemon. I swallowed past the lump in my throat and tried to force my body to calm down.

  I must have been close to dozing off again, because when I felt the duvet pulled taut beneath me, and Casper sitting upright in bed, my heart squeezed tightly in my chest. I made a noise in the back of my throat, indicating that I was ‘waking up’ too. Turning toward me in the gloom, he reached out a hand and placed it on my shoulder through the thick blankets, before giving a gentle squeeze.

  “Shh, don’t wake up. It’s too early,” he murmure
d, his voice husky and thick with sleep.

  The weight of his hand anchored me down and I felt my stomach flip as I made of show of snuggling back down under the blanket. Casper seemed to hesitate for a moment, gathering his thoughts, before dragging himself over to the bathroom. I wriggled over on the bed to nestle into the warm spot he’d left behind. When he came back in he didn’t come back to bed like I’d hoped. Instead, he wrapped himself up in his desk chair, pried open his laptop and was soon bathed in the pale blue glow of the screen, his heavy headphones snapped into place. After watching him for a little while, I let sleep take its hold over me once again.

  The next time I woke up it was to a rare moment of sunlight peering in through the curtains. The warmth was welcoming and the clattering of laptop keys had ceased. I yawned and stretched out against the mattress, arching my back. When my thigh collided with something solid through the blanket, I froze. I turned my head, casting my gaze to the other side of the bed. I breathed a sigh of relief when I noticed that it was only a rucksack dumped on the duvet. Sitting up, I winced as the cool air rushed over my chest. I groaned at my boner, reaching down to touch my aching member. Whining loudly, I turned onto my front, my hard-on rubbing roughly against the mattress, and clenched my eyes shut.

  The room was empty, but I didn’t delude myself into believing I had enough time to rub one out. The last thing I needed was for Casper to walk in to me wanking in his bed. I had never had such an ache to touch myself before. I wanted to get rid of it, but I would much prefer to have Casper’s cool hands touching me, caressing me and tugging me over the edge.

  “Do you need the bathroom?” Casper’s rough, low voice echoed out through the bathroom door.

  I took all of two moments to call out, “YES!” before hurrying to the bathroom, tugging my baggy jumper down over my erection. I crossed the room to the door, ready to duck inside as soon as he opened it. The lock clicked back and the door swung open; I was about to go in when I stopped. A cloud of steam puffed out in my face and in the midst of that damp, hot air stood Casper, naked except for the towel wrapped around his narrow hips and his damp skin looking flushed in the light. Water ran over his muscles and his hair hanging over his eyes like that –I wanted to press him up against the cold shower walls, rip that towel away and thrust my tongue into his wet mouth. I wanted to feel his body react to my touch, to pant and rut against mine. I wanted to know what his cock looked like and how quick he’d react to my mouth swallowing him whole.

  I gasped a quick, “Thanks!” before ducking inside and locking the door.

  Groaning, I braced myself over the sink and reached a hand into my bottoms to pull my cock out. I knew I shouldn’t do it, but that type of hard-on wasn’t about to deflate any time soon, not after how sexy Casper had looked. Swallowing thickly, I started to stroke myself from base to tip, barely waiting to pick up the pace. I couldn’t be too long. I just needed to get rid of it. I couldn’t be more than ten minutes! I tried to stifle a grunt as I sped up, and tugging my cock, pre-cum slicking over the tip. My breathing came out in short, rough gasps. I clenched my jaw and shook as I thought of Casper, dripping wet and bending down in front of me, sucking my dick and stroking me with quick hurried strokes. With that image lodged in my head it wasn’t long before I came in my hand. I tried not to let my groan echo out but it was difficult to keep it suppressed.

  Grimacing, I quickly rinsed my hands before tucking myself into my bottoms. After washing my face and rinsing my mouth out with some of his mouthwash, I raked a hand through my hair and sighed at my reflection. I looked peaky and the bags under my eyes were still there. I was a little worse for wear but I could only hope I’d look better once I was in proper clothes and had had a shower. I glanced down at the plughole and clenched my jaw, fear bubbling in my stomach.

  I needed to get away from the scene of the crime.

  I ducked out of the bathroom and stood in the doorway, watching as Casper dried the last of his hair –even straining to reach that annoying part at the back –and as soon as he was done and glanced over at me. My heart skipped a beat. His eyes looked so wide and bright in the morning, despite that he’d slept fewer hours than I had. “You didn’t want a shower?” he asked, the slight crease of a frown between his brows.

  “I can have one later on.”

  “I don’t mind, you know.”

  “It’s not that. I just don’t want to … overstay my welcome.”

  He and looked over at me. He frowned and then something like realisation dawned on his features. He sighed and dropped down into the desk-chair, refusing to look up at me. “You don’t think I trust you, do you?” he asked tonelessly.

  “Look, you have boundaries, right? I’m just trying to respect them that’s all.”

  “That doesn’t mean shitting yourself and running off whenever you feel awkward!” he snapped.

  “I don’t feel awkward,” I stated as I crept a few paces into the room. “I don’t, honestly. It’s just … This is all new to me too.”

  “Which part?”

  I walked around to sit on the bed so that he could see me. Even if he wanted to ignore me the only way to really do that would be to spin the chair around. We both knew he wasn’t childish enough to do that. He glared at me, jaw clenched, but other than that I took it as a good sign; stubborn, but good. “The part where I have to be the careful one,” I said with an edge. “I’m not used to it. My ex was the one who took control. I’m sorry if that’s not what you were looking for but it’s the truth.”

  “I wasn’t asking you for protection!” he snarled out, almost spitting the words.

  “I’m not offering it!” I exclaimed, heat rushing up my neck. I swallowed, trying to calm my voice down, “Look, I just –I really like you. I do. I’m not expecting anything. I’m happy just to be your friend, but you need to understand how hard it is being around you.”

  A muscle ticked in his jaw. Something inside me squirmed uneasily. His eyes darted to mine a few times before he sighed through his nose. “I know –I know. I do. Considering no one else even bothers giving me the time of day it’s nice having someone to talk to me. That’s weird for me.” He pressed a hand to his chest, “I haven’t had that in such a long time. You’ve given me that. I just wish there was more I could give you to … help.”

  “I just want us to be honest. Friends or more, I want you to be honest with me. I mean, what do I know about you, really?” I asked as I leaned back, “Your name, your classes and your sleeping habits.” He scoffed weakly and rolled his eyes. “Seriously, though Casper what do I really know about you?”

  His chair creaked as he mirrored my movements and leaned over on his knees. “What do you want to know?” he purred his eyelids low and his mouth pulled into a smirk. I wanted so badly to kiss that smirk off his face.

  I shuddered and readjusted my position on the bed. “Well … I don’t even know your birthday. When is it?”

  “May the third, so no you haven’t missed it.” He smiled smugly at me.

  “Okay well do you have any brothers or sisters?”

  He snickered with a shake of his head, “I have an older brother. He’s an arsehole.”

  I rolled my eyes. God, this boy was playing hard to get. “Well what’s his name? Age?”

  “His name is Ben and he’s much older –he’s twenty-seven.”

  “What about your parents?” I asked, trying to keep the pace of the conversation level.

  “Everyone has parents, Fletcher.”

  I rolled my eyes, “I mean are they together or divorced? What are their names?”

  “Tabitha and Martin Stokes married for twenty-eight years, and still together.”

  “Tabitha?” I blinked in surprise, “I just didn’t expect a woman named Tabitha to name her son ‘Casper’.”

  With a short laugh, Casper leaned back in the desk chair, “Well if we’re going to continue this then I want food, drink and a way to make it more entertaining.”

  “And how do
you plan on doing that?” I asked, cocking an eyebrow up at him.

  “I don’t know. We can think of that when we go out for food. I fancy something big. My choice, you nosey git. Now hurry up and shower.”

  I couldn’t help but laugh as I left his room. He seemed oddly chipper for some reason. Maybe he already had a way to make it fun. Regardless, I was more than happy to make him wait as I took my time getting ready.

  When our food finally came in the small restaurant, I launched myself at it like a lion. Casper rolled his eyes and bit into his own hamburger. “So what exactly is it you wanted to say to make the Q and A more interesting?” I asked as I slurped at my milkshake.

  “Well you could always put money on it?”

  Not interesting enough,” I stated. “Although I’m not entirely sure you could offer me much else.”

  “Well not a lot,” he smirked over at me before dropping his gaze to his burger, “but then it would depend on what you’d want.”

  I blinked at him before biting my lip in thought. I couldn’t ask for what I really wanted. He would freak out if he knew what I’d done earlier in his bathroom. The thought made me cringe with shame. My cheeks flushed as I ducked behind my fringe. What else could I ask him for? Outside of being able to touch him comfortably, there wasn’t much else I could ask. I bit down on my lip and frowned. “Anything?” I asked again, desperate to buy myself some time.

  He narrowed his eyes but nodded anyway, “As long as it isn’t too physically exerting for me.”

  “Well … I have to go home for the Easter holidays,” I hedged, glancing up at him to gauge his reaction.

  “Right?” he said slowly.