by S. E. Lund
From the time Jenna and I had split, my mother had been trying to either make amends between us, or match me with Felicia. When I had repeatedly told her Jenna and I could never reconcile, she gave up and pushed poor Felicia at me.
In that moment, I had no doubt that when I had made it clear I wouldn't be hooking up with Felicia, my mother turned back to her original plan to push Jenna and me together once more. She begged me to forgive Jenna. Said that it was a mistake and that if I couldn't forgive someone I loved so much for a mistake, I could never be married.
"That's right," I remembered saying. "I can never be married if it means forgiving a cheating bitch."
"I have to go," I said and turned on my heel, leaving the group to return to the house.
I got a few steps inside and heard footsteps behind me. When I turned, I expected it would be Dana following me to console me, but instead, it was Jenna.
She came over to me where I stood at the kitchen island, dumping my cup of coffee into the sink.
"I'm so sorry," she said and laid her hand on my arm, an expression of sadness on her face. "I had no idea you'd be here. Honestly. I asked and my mother said that you were staying in Manhattan this weekend because of the negotiation. I never would have come out here if I knew you'd be here."
"I'll believe that when pigs fly," I said, barely able to control my anger. "I have a friend with me and there's no way I want her to see you, of all people."
"Don't leave because of me. We'll go. I'll tell my mother that we're leaving. If she wants to stay, I'll go back. I'll take the car and leave. She can stay. I know she was looking forward to spending time with your mother."
"Don't bother," I said and rinsed off my hands in the sink. "I have a bad taste in my mouth now and think it's best if I leave. I know my mother and your mother arranged all this."
"Do you think so?" she asked, frowning. "I don't think—"
"Of course they arranged this accidental meeting. Of course they planned it and then hoped that seeing each other would push us back together again. If you can't see that, you're not as smart as I thought you were."
She sighed and stepped closer. "Seriously, Luke, I never thought you'd be here."
She put her hand on my arm once more, moving even closer like she wanted to hug me. She reached up and touched my cheek, then brushed hair out of my eyes.
I stared at her, unable to believe that she was acting all sad and sorry about what happened. How could she be so deceitful?
Finally, I pulled back, sick to my stomach about the nerve she had to try to cozy up to me after everything that happened between us.
"Where's Dylan, anyway?" I asked, acid in my tone.
“Dylan and I broke up a while ago. He took a new job and moved to Riyadh. He's flying planes for one of the princes, if you can believe it."
I shrugged, not caring what her bastard of an ex-boyfriend was doing with his time. I didn't care that the reason she agreed to marry me – the reason she pretended to want to marry me – was because he didn't want to get married. He wasn't rich enough for her mother either. A pilot for a small regional airline after he got out of the service, he was a playboy. She'd apparently been in love with him forever but he was never the right kind of man for her family.
I had been the right kind of man for them, but apparently not her.
Yeah, I was still hurt by her betrayal. I didn't love her anymore – I knew that the moment I saw her. I only felt contempt. But I still had the wound from when my trust and love had been thrown away for a night of sex with her true love before she committed to me.
That was her excuse, anyway. One night of hot sex to say goodbye forever to the man she had loved for years so she could commit fully to being my wife and the mother of my children.
Thing was, I could never trust her again when I knew she'd slept with him. She claimed it was a one-time only thing, to say goodbye forever, and that she hadn't slept with him the entire time we were engaged, but I didn't – I couldn't believe it.
I could never imagine sleeping with her again, as much as I thought she was very beautiful and smart.
She was a cheat.
That was enough to break it off completely.
A clean break with a promise I never wanted to see her in public again. I never wanted to go to any function she was at or want her at any family gathering. Her family was very close to my parents, but I had told them in no uncertain terms that if she or her mother were going to be at a function or at the house or at the beach house, I wouldn't be there and not to invite me or expect me to attend.
I'd spent several months in a funk, drinking myself crazy, smoking too much pot with my old buddies from college. It was only six months after we split, when Dana announced she was pregnant, that I came out of my funk and started to think about re-entering life.
That's when serious work on taking Chatter to the next level happened. That's when I focused all my energy on making it the best app possible. That's when it took off and we saw an exponential growth in its user base.
So, while my heart and pride took a beating when Jenna betrayed me, the rest of my life took off and I would finally have total and complete independence from my adoptive parents and the family money.
I now counted my blessings that I found out about Jenna's cheating ways before the wedding instead of after. It made me think even harder about how I was handling Eric's cheating on Dana.
"Whatever," I said and pulled my arm away from her. "I'm taking Alexa and going back to the city. You stay here. Enjoy your time with your mother. My weekend's been ruined."
I turned and left her, walking out of the great room, and taking the staircase to the second floor family wing. I went to my bedroom and found that it was empty. Alexa wasn't there. I checked for her bag, but it was gone as well, and her things were gone from the ensuite bathroom.
I hadn't seen her walk out to the patio where the family was so I went back down the stairs and checked the great room once more. There was no sign of her. I went out to the patio and checked but she wasn't sitting at the table with everyone. I could see Jenna sitting with her mother. She glanced away when she saw me.
"Has anyone seen Alexa? She's not in our room."
People shook their heads.
"No, dear," my adoptive mother said. "She hasn’t been out here since you got back from seeing the boat. Did she go for a walk on the beach?”
I walked down to the surf and looked in both directions, but didn’t see her. I sighed, and went back to the patio and through the house to the front entrance. I opened the door and checked out the driveway, but there was no sign of her so I took out my cell.
LUKE: Where are you? Did you leave?
There was no answer.
LUKE: Please answer me so I know you haven't been kidnapped or drowned when you snuck out to take a swim without me…
No answer.
FUCK.
Chapter 15
Alexa
* * *
I took a quick pee and brushed my hair, which had blown in the wind as we drove along the coastal highway with the windows open. I had enjoyed the trip to see Luke's catamaran. It was really exciting to imagine what it would be like when it was complete and he went sailing, visiting any number of exotic tropical spots in the Pacific.
What an amazing future Luke had planned.
It struck me how much freedom he'd have to do whatever he wanted from now on. He was so lucky…
I went back down the stairs to the great room and saw Luke standing close with a woman, her hand on his arm. It took me a second but I recognized her from the google search Candace and I had done before I agreed to meet him. It was Jenna — his ex-fiancée.
She was beautiful. Dark hair, dark eyes, fit lean body.
She was everything I wasn't, in other words.
She reached up and touched his cheek, then brushed hair out of his eyes in a gesture that was so tender and intimate, it made my heart skip a beat.
At that moment, I
had an epiphany.
I was getting too close to Luke. I was enjoying him far too much. I was imagining being with him on his boat, sailing to exotic locations and waking up with him beside me. I had this ridiculous fantasy in the back of my mind that he'd fall in love with me and realize he wanted to be married and have a family after all. That his broken heart had healed and he now wanted a real life with a real family.
That staying on Earth – with me – was what he really wanted after all.
What a fool.
Seeing Luke with Jenna made my throat choke up and a surge of regret flow through me.
What the heck was I doing at his beach house with him? What was I doing actually having sex with him when there was no way that he and I would get together?
First, he didn’t want to get married.
Second, he was from a wealthy family and was going to be one of the richest men under thirty in the world.
Third, I could tell by the way he was looking at Jenna that he was probably still in love with her. His expression was intense, and he was looking in her eyes the way I wanted him to look in mine.
I went back up to the bedroom and quickly packed my bag, deciding then and there I had to leave.
On my way out, I ran into Mrs. Marshall, who was just coming up the stairs.
"Oh, Alana, there you are," she said and stopped when she saw me with my bag in my hand. "You're leaving?"
"I am," I said and tried to go past her, not wanting to talk. "And my name's not Alana."
"You know he's still in love with her," she said as I passed her and took the stairs. "He doesn't want to admit it, but he is. A mother knows these things."
"Whatever," I said and ran down the stairs.
"It's better for everyone," she said, following me down. "He's on his way to big things. You're not quite in our," she said and hesitated like she was searching for the right word. "Circle of friends and acquaintances."
"What?" I said and turned back, frowning.
"You know what I mean. It's best that you two stop seeing each other."
I didn't know what to say so I just left, taking the front door and practically running down the driveway in hopes that Luke didn't see me and try to stop me.
I grabbed my cell and called a local taxi service, requesting a car to take me back to Manhattan. I'd walk a few blocks down the road and meet the taxi there rather than in front of the house in case Luke came to look for me.
I'd text Luke afterwards, when I'd calmed down, and tell him it was a great night but that I had to look after myself. I couldn't be pretending to be his girlfriend anymore. He'd have to tell everyone the truth – that he didn't want a girlfriend or wife. That he was planning on leaving Earth one day and there would be no family for him.
No heirs. No dynasty to carry on.
It choked me up, but I kicked myself mentally in the head for being such a romantic fool about Luke. Like Mrs. Marshall said, I wasn't part of his world and he wasn't part of mine. It was better that we ended it now. I couldn't imagine a life with Mrs. Marshall as my mother-in-law.
Having sex with Luke and doing the few things we did together had fooled my stupid mind into believing that he really felt those things and was right for me. I started to have real feelings for Luke, imagining us together. Happy.
I walked down the street, slipping my sunglasses on to hide my tears, and waited for the taxi to come and pick me up.
* * *
Later, on the way to the city, I got a text from Luke.
LUKE: Where are you? Did you leave?
That choked me up even more. Yeah, I left. When I saw the way he looked at Jenna, I realized that he hadn't gotten over her, despite all his protests. Then, Mrs. Marshall drove home just how different we were…
LUKE: Please answer me so I know you haven't been kidnapped or drowned when you snuck out to take a swim without me…
I wasn't going to answer. I didn't want him to apologize. I didn't want to read his lies about how he didn't feel anything for Jenna and that what I'd seen was a mistake.
There was no mistaking the way he looked at her and the way she looked at him.
I wasn't sure if he could forgive her, but I realized that me spending even more time with him, having sex with him again, might be fine for him, but it wasn't fine for me. I knew it would only end up hurting me.
We were from two different worlds.
I had to quit him and fast. Put him out of my mind.
I put my cell away and turned off the ringer, not wanting to hear in case he called.
Then I changed my mind.
I pulled out my cell and sent Luke a message that I hoped would end things between us for good.
ALEXA: I'm fine and no I didn't drown. Sorry about leaving without telling you, but I realized I can't keep up this façade of being your girlfriend. The sex was great, but I'm just not built to deal with casual hookups. It's not who I am. You're going to have to talk to people and tell them the way you really feel. You can't keep pretending, Luke. Be real with them and they'll finally realize you are your own man and have your own plans. Honesty is the best policy, or so they say…
Then I turned off my cell and turned off the ringer, not wanting to read his response.
* * *
I arrived back at the apartment and went upstairs, feeling like I had a huge weight on my shoulders. I had to buck up and be strong. It wasn't like Luke and I had any future, as Mrs. Marshall said. I knew that when I agreed to go with him to the beach house, but my silly romantic mind had let myself believe otherwise even if I was denying it.
Candace was sitting at her desk, one foot tucked under her, reading emails, when I walked into the room we used as an office.
"There you are – why are you home so soon? I thought you were going to stay for the entire weekend?"
I plopped my duffel bag down on the floor and slumped on my chair.
"The ex-fiancée showed up and I realized I was fooling myself if I thought he'd ever be interested in me for more than a stand-in fake girlfriend. Plus the mother pointed out that Luke and I are from two different classes and are not right for each other."
"What," she said and made an angry face. "That's bullshit. I'm sorry, kiddo. He's a real hunk of man, and this class shit is just that – crap. I saw him with you. He really likes you."
"He may, but you should have seen the way he looked at her."
"Aww, I'm sorry." She smiled and squeezed my arm. "But if he's really not into it, you should just put him out of your mind. Someone new and better will come along."
"I know, I know, but my stupid girl mind – the one who believed in princesses meeting handsome princes surfaced despite all my efforts to choke the living daylights out of her."
Candace laughed softly at that. "Yeah, I know. Too much Ariel and Anastasia in my past as well. We have to be realistic about guys. They're not Prince Charmings. They're guys from Seinfeld, like Georges and Newmans. Some look better than others, but they're all little boys underneath."
I nodded and took in a deep breath. "But man, he's as close as you can get to a Prince Charming, without the wanting to be married and have a real family part."
"He's a hunk of a billionaire man, that's for sure."
"That he is…"
I took out my cell and checked to see if he'd responded to my last text.
LUKE: I'm sorry you felt you needed to leave. If you saw me with Jenna, you should know I feel nothing for her anymore but contempt. I would have enjoyed spending the weekend with you, and now I feel bad that you didn't get any sun and surf in like I promised. But you're right. I have to start telling the truth to my meddling family. Thanks for everything you did to help me fake them out. I truly enjoyed being with you, and the sex was great. There – some honesty from me.
I read it over several times, feeling a bit sick to my stomach. I believed him that he enjoyed the sex. That much was clear. I believed him that he felt bad that I missed out on the sun and surf. I even believed that he
enjoyed being with me.
What I also believed was that there was no future for us, no matter how much we enjoyed each other's company.
From his message, I gathered he realized it as well.
It was best we break things off and make a clean start of it, no longer pretending to be together as a couple. I could feel myself being drawn into Luke's world. It would be so easy to just let things continue between us, with me acting as his pretend girlfriend and us having great sex whenever it was possible.
But I knew it would be me with a broken heart. It would be me waving goodbye to Luke as he sailed away on his catamaran to the South Pacific and then off to Mars or wherever it was he wanted to live.
So I had to protect myself.
Luke was gorgeous. Smart. Rich. Ambitious. A great lover.
He wasn't and would never be mine…
"He sent me a text, apologizing and claiming I misread things between him and his ex."
"I'm sure he hates her," Candace said. "Who wouldn't hate your fiancé for cheating on you a week before your wedding? I sure would."
"Me, too," I said and re-read his message. "I was looking forward to some sun and surf, but it would have become really uncomfortable with the ex there. Plus, we actually had sex and you know me. I'm not into meaningless sex, no matter how fun it might be."
She leaned forward, her eyes wide. "You did the deed? Oh, my God, tell me. Deets, please!" She reached out and touched my arm. “I mean, I’m really sorry things didn’t work out, but you have to be pleased to get some…”
I told her about my night with Luke and how good it had been.
"It just kind of happened naturally," I said, remembering how easy it had been to kiss him and to just have sex right then and there. How exciting it had been to do so in the great room despite the fact we might have been caught.
"Naughty girl," she said, her mouth wide. "I can't believe you did that! He's a bit kinky, huh?"
"Not really," I said. "At least, I didn't see anything other than he enjoyed talking dirty and risked getting caught.”