The Expectant Princess
Page 13
The corridor leading to Josephine’s suite was quiet, and Dominique met no one on her way. Two royal guards stood at the door. The sight of the two uniformed men brought home the unnerving fact that someone evil was lurking in their midst.
She struggled to push the dark thought away as she entered her mother’s suite and found her sitting on the couch, staring quietly off into space.
For a moment, the sight chilled Dominique. It wasn’t like Josephine to sit idly, and she never allowed her mind to be preoccupied with anything other than the task she was performing at the moment. For as long as Dominique could remember, Josephine had always thrown herself headlong into charity functions and social causes. But now, with King Michael’s disappearance, Nicholas and Marcus both feared for the queen’s safety and were reluctant to give her the freedom to leave the palace grounds.
“Mother? May I visit with you for a few minutes?”
Josephine’s smooth profile jerked toward the entrance of the room with a start, then just as instantly a smile lit her face as she spotted Dominique.
“Of course, my daughter. Please, come in.”
She patted the empty spot beside her on the rich brocade couch. Dominique obeyed while feeling as if she were ten again, rather than twenty-one and pregnant.
“We haven’t spoken since we received the news about Herbert,” the queen said as she flicked a spot of imaginary dust from her navy blue skirt. “I’m curious to know what you’ve been thinking, my dear.”
In all truth, Dominique had hardly been able to think about the issue of her missing father. Her mind had been consumed with Marcus and the awful way they had parted.
“I’m so sorry Herbert’s life was taken in such a ghastly way,” she said to her mother. “It’s difficult to believe that anyone could harm such a kindly old gentleman.”
Josephine inclined her head in agreement. “It’s apparent that he lost his life because he was with King Michael. Otherwise, there would be no advantage or reason to take his life.”
Dominique smoothed her hands together, then glanced around the ornate living room. The furnishings were the same as they had been years before. Rich silks and velvets draped the windows, deep wool covered the floor. It was a quiet, austere room. Hardly the sort of atmosphere that invited an intimate chat. But Dominique wouldn’t let herself be put off. She needed her mother now. Probably more than she’d ever needed her.
“Mother,” she began carefully, “what do you think about our American relatives?”
Josephine’s eyebrows lifted ever so slightly at her question. “I believe your father would be very pleased that his brother has finally come back to make amends with him. Frankly, I’m glad Edward and his sons decided to remain on the palace grounds. Having them here is a diversion from all this horrible occurrence connected to your father. And Sammy is a delight. It’s been a very long time since a toddler has been inside these old castle walls.” She paused, then studied her daughter with new regard. “Why do you ask?”
Apparently Josephine held no suspicious thoughts toward Edward Stanbury or Jake and Luke. Otherwise, she would have already voiced them. As for her pleasure over Sammy, it was comforting to know her mother had a soft spot for all children.
Deciding it would be best not to mention any suspicions she held toward the American Stanburys, Dominique answered blithely. “No reason in particular. I just wondered how you’d been getting along with them, that’s all.”
Josephine reassured her with a small smile. “Splendidly. And what about you?”
Dominique forced a smile on her face. “Oh, well, Isabel and Pru think I haven’t been getting along with anyone here lately,” she attempted to joke. “I suppose I need to work on being more sociable with everyone.”
To Dominique’s surprise, her mother reached over and gently patted her knee.
“I know how close you always were to your father, Dominique. I understand this can’t be an easy time for you.”
King Michael’s disappearance had been devastating to her, Dominique silently agreed. But it was only a small reason for the turmoil in her heart and the whole misconception by her family burdened her with deep guilt.
“I miss Father terribly,” she said in a strained voice. “The castle isn’t the same without him.”
A small sigh escaped Josephine and then she said in a low voice, “No. I didn’t realize how quiet this place would be until he was gone.”
Dominique’s sidelong glance at her mother was thoughtful. “Mother,” she began cautiously, “I’ve never talked to you about this before—and I hope you won’t think I’m intruding, but—”
Curious now, Josephine turned on the cushion to face her daughter more squarely. “But what, my dear? What are you trying to ask me?”
Dominique drew in a deep breath and wondered why she found it so hard to communicate with her mother. It had always been so easy to talk to her father. He was brusque, but always open and ready to speak his mind. With Josephine’s quiet, reserved manner, no one, not even her children, ever really knew what was in her thoughts.
“I’ve often wondered—what did you think all those years ago when you were told it had been arranged for you to marry Father?”
Surprise flickered in Josephine’s eyes and for a moment Dominique decided she was going to gently change the subject. But then her mother’s expression softened and her eyes changed to a dreaminess that Dominique had never seen before.
“To be honest, Dominique, I was outraged and defiant. I didn’t want to marry a man I’d never met. Especially one from another country. But as Princess of Wynborough it was my duty to obey my parents’ wishes and do my part to solidify the country’s union with Edenbourg. So I had little choice in the matter. I kept my true feelings to myself and went forward with as much dignity as I could.”
I kept my true feelings to myself. Those words were like a book opening up inside Dominique and for the first time in her young life, she could read and understand her mother.
Early on, Josephine had been groomed and prepared to take her place amongst noble blood. Whether it be the Wynboroughs’ or the Stanburys’. Fifty years ago, a woman, especially from a royal family, had no choice in the direction her life took. Honor, duty, dignity. Those things came first and personal feelings last. Marcus held those same beliefs and Dominique knew it shocked and angered him because she could not be like her mother. But Dominique wanted love and happiness in her life and she wasn’t sure Josephine had ever had either.
“When did you finally meet Father?”
A wry smile touched the queen’s lips. “On the day of my wedding.”
Amazed, Dominique studied the regal beauty of her mother’s face. “Oh. I can’t imagine how difficult that must have been,” she murmured as much to herself as to Josephine. “To place your hand in a stranger’s and all the while knowing he was going to be your husband for the rest of your life.”
“It wasn’t easy,” Josephine agreed. “At that time your father was very handsome, but equally fierce-looking. I felt as though I were being handed over to a Viking warrior. I trembled throughout the ceremony and for days afterward.”
New respect and admiration for her mother filled Dominique as she thought about all the trials the other woman had endured back then. Josephine had been forced to leave the security of her home and family in Wynborough and travel to a far-off country and make a new life with a stranger. Dominique wasn’t at all sure she could have been that brave.
“Was it difficult to adjust to being his wife?” Dominique wanted to know.
Josephine smiled and Dominique was instantly bemused by the tiny glow of light in her mother’s eyes.
“At first,” she admitted. “I was timid and your father impatient. But then I began to learn Michael’s habits and personality and he began to learn mine and it wasn’t so hard. Especially when we both agreed on having several children.”
The mention of children brought home the very reason Dominique was troubled and for a m
oment she considered telling her mother she was with child. But the thought of Marcus and her baby’s reputation held her back.
“Then your marriage turned out to be better than you expected?”
Josephine looked at her daughter as though she found it comical that Dominique had to ask such a thing.
“Of course it turned out better. Back in Wynborough, when my parents told me of my future fate, I had to fight the urge to run away, to do anything that would spare me from marrying a stranger. I was convinced my life would be ruined forever. You see, Dominique, as a young woman all I’d ever dreamed about or wanted was to marry a man I loved. I believed my parents were taking that dream away from me.”
And how that must have hurt, Dominique thought. How disillusioned Josephine must have felt when she’d traveled to Edenbourg to become the wife of a man she’d never met.
She looked at her mother, wondering how she could ask her if she had ever found true love with Michael Stanbury. But the problem of posing the question was instantly taken out of her hands as Josephine began to speak softly once again.
“Instead, they had given me a dream come true. At the time, I just didn’t have the wisdom to see it.”
Dominique’s eyebrows lifted. “Then you…grew to love Father?”
A tender smile lifted the queen’s lips. “I tried to resist his charms, but in the end it was impossible. I fell in love with him almost instantly. I loved his fierceness, his laugh, his touch. He became a part of me and I a part of him.” Her eyes welled with unexpected tears as she looked at Dominique. “I never thought I would lose him this way. I never thought I could miss anyone so much.”
Torn by the sight of her mother’s misery, Dominique instantly reached for her hands and held on to them tightly. “Oh, Mother, I’m so sorry. But I believe we will get him back. Somehow. Some way.”
“I pray that we will, Dominique,” she whispered earnestly. “I pray that I will be given a second chance to tell your father how much I love him. How much I’ve always loved him.”
Dominique tried to swallow down the tears burning her throat. “I’m sure wherever father is, he knows how you feel about him.”
Josephine shook her head with regret. “It’s never been easy for me to express my feelings toward others. Even toward your father. I never told him in exact words that I loved him. I simply took it for granted that he knew how I felt about him.” She sighed deeply, then turned a pointed look on Dominique. “That’s my one regret, daughter. So I’m sharing this difficult lesson with you today. If you do fall in love with a man, don’t hold the truth of your feelings back from him. Tell him how you feel before it’s too late.”
Tell him how you feel. Everything inside Dominique suddenly went still. Would it make a difference, she wondered, if she told Marcus she loved him? Probably not. He didn’t believe in the emotion. He didn’t want it. But at least she wouldn’t be burdened with the regret of not trying.
Squeezing her mother’s hands, she said, “Thank you for sharing this with me, Mother. It’s helped me more than you know.”
Josephine smiled with tender affection. “I’m glad. Now tell me, dear daughter, what is this all about? Have you found a young man you want to marry?”
A spurt of crazy hope dashed through Dominique, but she quickly squashed it down. She’d told Marcus she never wanted to speak with him again and he was a man of great pride. Even if she initiated an invitation for them to meet, he might refuse to see her.
“Maybe. I’m not sure yet.”
Quickly, she rose to her feet, then bent and kissed her mother’s cheek. “Right now I hope you’ll forgive me for leaving so abruptly, but there’s something I need to attend to.”
Josephine waved her away and Dominique dashed out of the suite and hurried back to her own. Prudence had returned from her errand and stepped through the swinging doors of the kitchenette the moment she heard her princess’s footsteps.
“My goodness, what’s all the rush about?” Prudence asked as she watched Dominique sink down on the couch and struggle to catch her breath. “Has something happened?”
Yes, Dominique thought. She’d just learned that she was more like her mother than she’d ever dreamed. She’d been hiding her true feelings, her real self, for a long time. But unlike Josephine, she wasn’t going to wait until it was too late to do something about it.
“Not yet,” Dominique answered, then bounded from the couch and crossed the room to a small writing desk.
As she scratched out a quick note on pale pink stationery, Prudence slowly approached her.
“What do you mean? Are you expecting some sort of news to break about your father?”
She folded the note and slipped it into an envelope. After sealing it, she handed the message to her lady-in-waiting. “This has nothing to do with my father’s disappearance,” she answered. “I want you to deliver this personally to Marcus. I’m not sure if he’ll be in his office or apartment. Just find him and do it quickly.”
Prudence looked as if she was going to question Dominique further. But something must have changed the other young woman’s mind because she quickly turned on her heel and headed toward the foyer.
“I won’t return until I find him,” she tossed the promise over her shoulder.
Since Marcus had stepped into the position of king’s high counsel, he’d never doubted a decision he’d made concerning the country, the king or even his own ill-fated marriage to Liza. He’d always been certain that he’d chosen the best path for everyone involved.
Until he’d made the choice to walk away from Dominique.
The thought made him rake both hands through his hair with helpless frustration. He shouldn’t be feeling this miserable or torn, he told himself as he prowled restlessly from room to room in his small apartment. He should be relieved that Dominique had refused his proposal.
After Liza, he’d sworn never to marry again. He hadn’t wanted a second chance to have a wife or child. The pain of losing them both had been more than enough to convince Marcus that love or marriage was not his cup of tea.
But if he was going to be honest with himself, he had to admit he’d never wanted anything as much as he wanted for Dominique to become his wife.
It didn’t make sense, he mentally argued. Why did he feel this desperate need to marry her?
The question caused him to pause long enough to sink into a stuffed armchair and stare out the picture window overlooking the palace grounds.
His job demanded devotion to his king, and Marcus had always given it loyally. But his position as king’s high counsel did not include marrying the king’s pregnant daughter to save face for the Stanbury family. It didn’t mean it was his responsibility to give the baby a father or secure its future. Yet he wanted to do all those things. He wanted the child to be his. He wanted Dominique to be his.
Why? he asked himself for what seemed like the hundredth time. Isabel was King Michael’s daughter also, but if she was unwed and pregnant he wouldn’t feel inclined to marry her. Because he didn’t love her, he reasoned. He loved Dominique.
The last thought jolted him like the strike of a fist against his chin. For long moments he stared blindly out the window as emotions too big to contain began to roil inside him.
Dear Lord, what was he going to do now? he prayed. How was he going to convince Dominique that he wanted to do more than protect her? How was he going to make her see that he wanted to have a shared life with her, have children together, grow old together? He’d told her more than once that he no longer believed in love. He’d specified in clear terms to her that he didn’t want or need that sort of devotion from her or any woman. She would probably take great pleasure in throwing those very words back in his face.
But he had to try, he decided. He had to make her see that the three of them could be happy together if she would only give him the chance to prove it.
With a rush of hopeful excitement, he jumped to his feet, then glanced at the telephone.
He could call to make sure Dominique was in her suite. But he didn’t want to take the chance that she might refuse to see him. Better to have the element of surprise on his side, he thought as he hurried out the door.
The storm of two days ago had cleared away and the late-afternoon sun was warm and pleasant on his back as he made his way toward the castle. For the first time in days, he noticed spring had truly arrived and flowers were beginning to bloom along the walkways and the carefully tended beds scattered across the sloping lawns of the palace grounds.
Seeing the colorful blossoms made Marcus wonder if the roses had also begun to bud. He knew the precious flower was one of Dominique’s favorites. If he could snatch one before he made his way up to her suite, it couldn’t hurt his cause to offer her the symbol of love.
The notion had him changing directions at the last minute and cutting through the garden in the back courtyard of the castle. Here the sun felt even warmer and birds whistled and chirped among the tree limbs. After a quick glance at the nearest bushes, he spied a yellow rosebud on the verge of opening its petals. Marcus snapped it off before one of the gardeners spotted him and yelled a loud protest.
He was so intent on getting inside the castle and up to Dominique’s suite with the rose that he almost didn’t notice the woman sitting at the far end of the garden on a wrought-iron bench. But a flash of movement caught the corner of his vision and he paused on the flagstone to glance in her direction.
Immediately, she rose from the bench and Marcus’s heart skipped several beats as he realized it was Dominique standing only a few feet away from him. She was dressed in slim white slacks and a navy blue sweater trimmed in white. Her hair was tied back at the base of her neck with a red silk scarf. The fact that she looked beautiful was no surprise. But the smile on her face caught him totally off guard.