by Simmons, Pat
Michael wanted to stay as long as Desi was there, but he couldn’t. As she returned from the bathroom, Michael cornered her. “This was nice, and you look very pretty.” When she blushed, Michael did all he could to rein in his cockiness, so as not to spoil the light-hearted mood. He frowned and lowered his voice. “I have to leave so I can get up early in the morning. Be careful going back to wherever you’re staying.” He paused. “Is it a safe place?”
“Yes.” She nodded. “I’m at the Residence Inn not far from here.” She started to say something else but stopped.
“Thank you…” Michael didn’t know what possessed him, but he brushed a kiss against her cheek, retrieved his coat and walked out the door. He was barely behind the wheel when his smartphone alerted him of a text. Desi. He grinned.
No surprise visits. I mean it, Michael. I only told you so you wouldn’t worry.
I always will.
I know.
Michael could imagine her saying that as he glanced at the house. Desi was standing in the window watching him. When she waved, Michael honked and drove away. “I love her.” He was starting to understand the meaning of James 1:4: Let patience have her perfect work...
CHAPTER ~13~
Thanksgiving dinner had seemed to be a turning point for Desi. Michael’s kiss to her cheek was a nice touch to end the evening. She was surprised that after he left no one made derogatory comments about him. Actually, no one said anything, even her opinionated grandmother, which she thought was odd.
After a long exhausting week at work, Desi was glad to have the weekend off. As she changed clothes, she reflected on the change of seasons, not only outside, but in her life. “A time to laugh and a time to mourn…” Ecclesiastes 3. “Well, Lord, I guess I’ve had both this year.” She chuckled although nothing was funny.
She surveyed her surroundings. She had been in her extended stay hotel for more than six months. As soon as the divorce was final and Michael sold the house, she could take the proceeds and buy a cozy condo. As she glanced out the window, the cotton ball-shaped clouds mesmerized her. She didn’t need to watch the news to predict when snowfall was on the horizon.
While some people enjoyed sunrises or sunsets, Desi had always liked the rain as a child. As she grew older, she became addicted to the season’s first snowfall. If she could, Desi would stop whatever she was doing to take in the moment, sometimes for hours.
When the snow began to fall, Desi scrambled to get outdoors. She piled on layers of clothes. Grabbing a thick blanket off the bed, she hurried to the lobby where twin benches were stationed at the entrance. Pulling her knees up to her chest, she stared as the flakes danced in the air before resting where they landed.
Desi sighed. Her pending divorce ordeal would be over soon. Then by Christmas, she would be sadly single again. Desi knew it was for the victim’s benefit that God allowed divorce, but she never thought she would be the recipient of one. As the snow began to come down heavier, it reminded her of the many tears she had shed. She had basked in the title of being Mrs. Bishop and how much she loved her husband. She had invested three years into her marriage. Now, was it worth it to divorce Michael? Would God give her another chance at love?
She shivered and wrapped the blanket tighter around her shoulders. The only thing missing was that cup of hot chocolate.
Residents parked and hurried inside their apartments. Footsteps shuffled behind her, but Desi was in too much of a trance to look over her shoulder. When a hand shoved a large coffee cup in front of her, she accepted without turning around. Her hearted pounded. It was Michael.
“Thanks.” Bowing her head, Desi blessed it and took a lingering sip of hot chocolate from the coffee cup. “Ah.” She smacked her lips and Michael sat beside her with extra blankets under one arm and a Styrofoam cup in the other hand.
She felt too content to protest. “What are you doing here?”
“The snow. It’s one more thing that makes me think of you and what we had.”
The snow seemed to hypnotize her. She couldn’t pull away to look at him. “So many things make me think of us. Snowfall, baking, movies, reading to each other, lovemaking—I held on to my virginity, believing God would send me the right man. I trusted God that despite my sisters and mother’s bad experiences with men that I would be the exception,” she rambled on and was glad Michael didn’t interrupt. “Even though I had a career, I always imagined myself as a mother, being in love ‘til death us do part. …” Desi talked until she tired herself out. When she shivered, Michael wrapped more blankets around her shoulders and scooted closer.
Michael’s baritone voice lowered into a whisper as he pierced the quietness. “I always told myself whenever I found the right woman, I was going to pull out all the stops to make her fall in love with me…”
Desi listened, sipping her hot chocolate, but she never looked his way.
“Since my parents were deceased and it was just me and Zachary, I wanted mini-me’s and mini-you’s running around. I’ve learned so much this past year. Never take God’s blessings for granted, for the Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away, but blessed be the name of the Lord. I’ve also lived two lives. The truth where I loved you and the lie where I proved that I could be my own worst enemy…”
They sat for hours talking, listening and indulging in the silence until layers of snow covered the parking lot and cars. When she had drained the last of her hot chocolate, Desi twisted her lips in a pout.
Although she didn’t complain, Michael must have sensed her disappointment and handed her his. While she was hesitant, he brought the rim to her lips and coaxed her to take a sip. Grinning, she swiped his cup and began drinking as if it were her own. Once she finished his cup, she shifted in her cocoon of warm blankets and faced him.
Michael inched closer. She could smell the cocoa on his breath, or maybe it was hers. Desi closed her eyes as his lips touched hers. They indulged in an unrushed fashion. The kiss was so gentle, slow and sweet. Desi didn’t know she was crying until she sniffed and opened her eyes to blurred vision. Something within her snapped and the tears came from nowhere. As she sobbed, Michael held her, resting his jaw on the top of her head. She didn’t push him away. She missed the intimacy between them.
Once she composed herself, she didn’t face him. “Sorry about that.”
“The kiss or the tears?”
Desi wanted to say both, but she had always enjoyed kissing her husband. “The tears.”
“I caused them. It’s only right that I should be here to wipe them away.”
He was right, so she didn’t argue. Resting her head on his shoulder, Desi closed her eyes. Why was she so content—was it Michael or the snow? “Do you have a backpack in the car?”
“We’ve never left home without one in this weather.”
“You can stay the night, so you don’t have to drive home in this.” What possessed her to offer him lodging? If he got stuck, AAA was ready to assist motorists.
Michael gave her a bewildered look. “Are you sure?”
Was she sure? “Yes, on the couch.”
***
Michael hadn’t realized four inches of snow had fallen while they talked until he trekked through it to retrieve the backpack with extra clothes out of his car. His heart pounded with excitement at his wife’s unexpected invitation. He didn’t know what it meant, but he wasn’t turning down any quiet time with Desi.
Desi led the way to her second floor apartment. What was going through her mind? Humph, reconciliation was going through his. Kiss and makeup to be exact. Michael chided himself for getting carried away. He would follow her lead and pray every step of the way.
At the doorstep of apartment two-ten, Desi stomped her boots to knock off the excess snow, but it was piled up against her door. Once they entered, Michael’s heart dropped at her meager surroundings. His actions had forced his wife to flee the luxury of their two story home to this place that was one large studio. He should have left—no he should have resis
ted.
“Where’s your broom?”
“Why?”
“I want to sweep some of the snow away from your door.”
Desi smiled and pointed to the corner. Michael performed the task in record time and came back inside to see her turning on the gas fireplace. They had two real ones at home—in their living room and master bedroom.
“Hungry?”
Michael shook off his coat and rested it on a hook. “What ya cooking?” He grinned and found his way into her bathroom and washed his hands.
“I made chili last night and I have some leftover cornbread.”
He strolled back in and sat on a stool at the counter and watched her shift things around in the refrigerator. She pulled out a pot and placed it on the stove. He missed the harmony they shared in the kitchen. “Is there anything I can do?” Say yes, I want to be close to you.
“I don’t think so—well, I guess you can grab that bag of lettuce and make us a salad.”
Beaming, he gave her a military salute and followed her orders. In fifteen minutes tops, they were sitting at her two chair table. Michael gathered her hands in his. He missed their softness. “Father God, in the mighty name of Jesus, we come to You with thanksgiving for another day and another moment. Bless us, our meal and sanctify it from all impurities. In Jesus’ name. Amen.”
“Amen.”
Desi said very little as they ate in silence. Maybe she was all talked out from earlier, but he didn’t push her. As they finished up, he offered to clean up and load the dishwasher.
She looked surprised by his offer, but nodded. “Do you want to watch a movie?”
“Whatever you want to do.” Michael tried to appear calm, but inside his spirit was rejoicing for this very moment with his wife.
After two movies, one a comedy, the other an adventure, they began to doze. Desi yawned and stood. He watched emotions play on her face. “Ah, let me get you a sheet, some cover and a pillow.”
Nodding, Michael hid his disappointment. They had never slept apart until she walked out—for good reason. Even when he cheated on her, Desi would find her way to his side of the bed to snuggle in his unworthy arms. It was at those times, the guilt ate at him. He had had everything he wanted and needed in his own bed.
“There’s only one bathroom, so I’ll go first,” she said, handing him items for his makeshift bed.
While she brushed her teeth and dressed for bed, Michael grabbed things out of his backpack. When he had packed it earlier, he never dreamed that he would be spending the night. As a matter of fact, Michael didn’t know what kind of reception Desi would give him, especially after she warned him not to come uninvited. But when the snow was forecasted, he risked her wrath to be with her and it paid off. “Thank You, Lord.”
Not long after coming out of the bathroom, Desi went straight into her bedroom and called from behind closed doors that he could go into the bathroom. Gathering his pajama bottoms, he wondered what she was wearing. He found out when he came out the bathroom. She was walking around in plaid two-piece flannel PJs. Ugh.
He watched as she checked the door and turned on the night light above the stove. In the shadows of the room, they stared at each other. Michael waited for her to make the first move and she did.
“Good night.” She walked passed him, went into her bedroom. Seconds later, the lock clicked on the door.
That action caused his heart to drop. He flopped onto the sofa. He folded his hands and rested them on his forehead. “Jesus, Your Word says You will complete the work You set out to do. Lord, please remember us in Your work.”
Michael prepared the sofa and stretched out. He didn’t know how long he tossed and turned. Of course the couch was uncomfortable, but it was Desi locking the door that kept him awake. Finally, with determination, he drifted off to sleep.
A faint sound stirred Michael from his slumber. He blinked and took in his surroundings, remembering where he was. As he shifted on the couch, he heard it again. Straining his ears, Michael stood. He quietly moved closer to Desi bedroom door to confirm that she was crying.
CHAPTER ~14~
“You cheated on me…” Desi hadn’t had that nightmare in a while. Why tonight? she wondered as she sprung up in bed, panting. She scanned her bedroom. Yes, she was still in the extended stay hotel, but something was different. She looked to her closed door, then remembered.
Michael was on the other side, sleeping. Wait a minute. She frowned. It sounded like he was whispering. Her first inkling was that he was on his smartphone talking to another woman. Enraged, she was about to kick him out in the snow, when she cracked open the door to see his back to her. He was sitting at her small table praying. She strained to hear parts of his private prayer.
“Jesus, this isn’t about me, but Desi. Bless her abundantly for the pain I caused her…”
Quietly closing her door, this time she felt safe enough to keep it unlocked. Her heart melted at his concern for her. She climbed back under the cover, wishing that the past months had been nothing but a dream.
The next morning, Desi woke to the smell of coffee and bacon. At first, she panicked that someone was in her apartment. Then she remembered Michael had stayed the night. Desi snatched her robe off the chair and headed to the bathroom and reappeared refreshed. When she rounded the wall to the kitchen, Michael was there bare-chested making pancakes. And just think, at one time, he was all hers. Desi dismissed the melancholic mood as she spied the cover and sheets on the couch. They had been neatly folded and put aside. Glancing up, a sexy smile stretched across his face. “Good morning. I hope you don’t mind me taking the liberty to cook you breakfast.”
Tilting her head, Desi studied him. He looked tired despite the smile he gave her. She thought about him praying last night. “I don’t. I’ll set the table.” Michael had already done it. “Do you want me to take those out while you freshen up?”
“Sure, I’ll jump in the shower if you don’t mind. You can eat without me.”
“I’ll wait.”
“I’ll only be a sec.” Michael got his clothes and headed toward the bathroom, then pivoted on his heel. He walked toward her and kissed her forehead. “You’re still beautiful in the morning.” He was gone before she could respond.
Desi kept the pancakes warm on the griddle as she sipped on her coffee, then shook her head in amusement. Her husband never could make coffee right. It was always too strong. Desi doubted she would ever drink coffee again without thinking about him. In record time, Michael reappeared nicely dressed and pleasing to her eyes.
They sat. This time, she blessed the food and they dug in. Their eyes spoke volumes whenever they caught the other staring at them. Michael finished first and wiped his mouth. When he reached for her hands, she didn’t snatch them back. “Desi.” Squeezing her fingers, he stared into her eyes. “I heard you crying last night.”
Desi looked away. “And I heard you praying last night,” she said to his shocked expression.
Releasing her hands, Michael leaned back and rubbed his jaw, definitely a sign that he was in thought. “Desi, I love you more now than I did when I first married you.” He held up his hand to keep her from interrupting. “I know I hurt our marriage and you. I can never erase that. If one of us has to have regrets in life, I don’t want it to be you. If you decided to take me back, I don’t want to put you through wondering if you can trust me when I leave your presence.
Patting his chest, Michael seemed to struggle. “It’s me who should have the regrets. And I will have them, knowing I messed up and lost the one woman who loved me unconditionally. That’s my regret to live with. My prayer is for you to be happy and I don’t think you can be with me anymore.”
Michael exhaled. He uttered the sentiment she had been feeling and saying all along. So why did she hurt? She refused to cry, but that didn’t keep her eyes from watering. For a distraction, Desi stood and began to gather their plates. When he offered to help, she was about to beg him off, then thought again. Thi
s very well might be their last time together as husband and wife.
CHAPTER ~15~
Hours after Desi’s guest left, Michael’s cologne lingered in her apartment. And that night, she hugged the pillow he used to rest his head. Days later, she received flowers on her job with a message: Because you’re simply beautiful.
Sitting at her desk daydreaming, Desi accepted that they had come a long way over the months. She knew within her heart that Michael had truly repented and that she had truly forgiven him. So where was her peace?
When the bittersweet court date arrived, Desi entered the judge’s imposing courtroom. Attorney Rush was already there, sifting through paperwork. Desi slid into the second row from the front and exhaled. Bowing her head, Desi closed her eyes and prayed, but the words never came. A caress on her shoulder caused her to look up into the brown eyes of the man she had vowed to love forever, which she always would, but from afar.
“Ready?” His eyes were filled with sadness and his voice low.
How could one ever be ready to divorce the husband she loved? It was his unfaithfulness that put them there. Desi had never been inside a courtroom in her life, not even for jury duty.
“Well, I guess I better get behind enemy lines.” Michael gave her a weak smile and went to the other side where he met with his attorney. The woman was young, slightly overweight and wore a wedding ring. Desi sighed. Would she always zoom in on a woman’s right hand?
“All rise,” the bailiff instructed the courtroom as the judge entered.
Attorney Rush advised Desi that her case was number six on the docket. Great, so she had to wait and witness the bickering and heartaches of five other couples before hers. Some lifelong contracts seemed to be dissolved with a snap of the fingers while a few spewed venom across the room. Couples fought over assets, children, even pets.
The hostility scared her. Michael glanced over his shoulder at her. He offered a kind smile. That gesture calmed her nerves.