Blood Sisters

by Melody Carlson

  “By the way, is that your real name?” she looked at him curiously.

  “Well, now, little lady,” he began in what sounded like a pretty good James Cagney imitation, “I could give you the answer to that question, but then I’d have to kill you.” .

  She laughed and held the door open for him against the blustery wind. “Well, you just might have to get in line to do it, Mr. Ford.”

  He frowned. “I certainly hope not.”

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  AFTER A SOUND NIGHT’S sleep, Judith awoke early. It took her a moment to remember where she was, but the old-fashioned pink-and-yellow crocheted bedspread in the guest room reminded her. She showered and dressed, then took her breakfast outside to enjoy in the cool morning air. After thoroughly watering the garden and flower beds, she kept herself busy by dusting and cleaning Aunt Lenore’s house. For although everything was neatly in its place, it was obvious that a good, thorough cleaning hadn’t been done in some time. No doubt that Aunt Lenore, in her elderly state, might have found deep cleaning to be too strenuous. But Judith didn’t mind a bit.

  As she cleaned, she continued to role-play in her mind, setting up every possible scenario where she would have to respond, or perhaps control her reactions, according to this new character she was steadily creating. She paused before the cloudy antique mirror above the guest room bureau, a bottle of glass cleaner still in her hand and stared at her reflection. “Hello, my name is Judith Blackwell. And I am a racist bigot.” No, she thought in dismay, it’s simply not believable. Not the dialogue, which she knew was absolutely ridiculous, but something about her appearance seemed seriously amiss as well.

  She studied herself carefully. What exactly was the image she normally projected anyway? Middle-class, middle-aged, middle-of-the-road? She looked sensible, careful, maybe even tasteful. In her neat jeans and loafers and white shirt, she looked like someone who didn’t really wish to stick out in a crowd, someone who kept to herself, someone’s mom. But it was definitely all wrong. She tried to remember how Jasmine’s mother used to dress. Although, in Judith’s opinion, she never had the best taste, Ellen Morrison had always taken great care in her appearance. She enjoyed color and jewelry—the flashier, the better, it seemed. Judith studied herself again. Surely Mrs. Morrison would find her drab and plain, dreary and dull. And perhaps, iƒ Mrs. Morrison were around, and Judith wasn’t even sure that she was, then perhaps it would be important to win this woman over. Not that Mrs. Morrison ever exerted much influence over her hardheaded husband. There’d never been any doubt in Judith’s mind over who ruled the Morrison household. And furthermore, Mr. Morrison firmly believed a woman’s place was in the home. Not that Judith necessarily disagreed with that—well, at least not in theory. She thought again how much she missed her husband. She and Peter had always treated each other as equals, and he’d never been intimidated by her life or teaching career. In fact, he had often encouraged her to pursue her interests.

  Judith dragged her thoughts from Peter back to Mrs. Morrison—how might she change her appearance to win this woman over? She knew Mrs. Morrison would approve of the haircut. She’d always liked it when Jasmine and Judith wore their hair short and neat. But Judith needed clothes with more color, more vitality, and perhaps some accessories too. And maybe if she looked the role, it would help her to play it and carry it off. So she began to make a short list of the wardrobe and props that she might need. Right off, she knew that her car was all wrong. An import. She could just hear Mr. Morrison scolding her for not “buying American.” She could apologetically tell him that it had been her late husband’s car. Yes, that would work and perhaps even evoke a little sympathy at the same time. But how was she to establish contact with the Morrisons in the first place? That was assuming they were even in town. Perhaps she’d start with Hal. Though she hadn’t been back to his hardware store in days, he had been somewhat friendly during her last visit there. It suddenly occurred to her that if Hal could help her to make contact with the Morrisons, she might even discover where Aunt Lenore was staying. In fact, the more she considered everything, it seemed only natural that she should be looking for the Morrisons now. She had a right to find out about Aunt Lenore’s welfare. She found herself smiling at her reflection in the mirror. It felt good to have a real plan to follow.

  “Hello?” called Adam from the back of the house.

  “I’m coming,” she called.

  “Sorry to just walk in like that,” he apologized, “but I knocked several times and no one answered. I was a little concerned.”

  “I was back in the spare room.”

  He handed her a spiral notebook. “I want you to study these notes I made, and then return it to me or destroy it. We don’t want to take a chance of anyone else seeing it.”

  “Thanks.” She scanned the first page. It was her list of dos and don’ts. “There’s a lot to take in here, Adam.”

  “I know. I hope you have a good memory.”

  She smiled faintly. “Well, in the past I’ve been accused of having too good of a memory.”

  “That’ll help.” Adam frowned. “Judith, are you absolutely certain you still want to go through with this?”

  She nodded. “Positive. In fact, I’ve already been practicing. And I think I’ll go shopping for my costume this morning.”

  “Costume?”

  “Yeah. I just realized that the way I look is all wrong.”

  He studied her appearance then nodded. “I think you’re right. Totally wrong.” A crooked smile played across his mouth. “I mean, don’t misunderstand me, I think you look perfectly fine and everything—”

  She laughed. “But it’s not right for the person I’m trying to portray.”

  “Exactly. You look too, well, how would I describe it, sort of collegiate and classy, I suppose.”

  “Well, thank you.”

  “Not that racists all have a certain look.” he added. “Of course, there’s the traditional redneck image, and believe me, they do exist. But that’s not how I’d describe these people. Well, not all of them anyway, and not the leaders. I think you’re smart to change your image, and hopefully it’ll help remind you that you’re playing a part, you know, sort of keep you in character.”

  “That’s exactly what I was thinking.”

  He smiled at her enthusiasm for a moment before saying, “Judith, there’s something else. I wrote it in the notebook, but I wanted to remind you in person too.”

  “What’s that?”

  “Well, just because you’re trying to fit in with them, be careful not to go overboard. Keep in mind that you really don’t need to act like you’re just like them. In fact, I think it would make them suspicious. I think you need to act more like you’re sort of ambivalent, you know what I mean? As though you’ve never really given racism that much thought, but perhaps you don’t like what’s happening in our country politically. And also, it’ll help if you seem very traditional and conservative.”

  “Well, I am fairly conservative.”

  He laughed. “Not by these people’s definition. Believe me, your version of conservative is quite different than theirs.”

  She nodded. “Yes, I suppose you’re right.”

  “What I’m trying to say is that I think you should play it like you’re sort of undecided about these things, you know? Like you mostly just loved Jasmine and you care about them. That way you can allow them the chance to try to recruit you into their circle. They really like doing that.”

  “Recruiting?”

  “Yes. I think it gives them a sense of power and accomplishment. Playing the lost lamb is very appealing.”

  “To the wolves.”

  He nodded grimly. “You get the picture.”

  “Thanks, that’s helpful.” She closed the notebook. “I’ll study this today.”

  “Well, I’d better get to work now.” He glanced at his watch. “I figured you should probably just spend today going over all this and getting yourself prepared for you
r role.”

  She frowned. “Really? I was hoping for something more. I thought I might at least drop by the hardware store later today to say hello to Hal.”

  “Are you sure you’re ready?”

  “I think so. I just realized that it’s perfectly natural for me to go to him and inquire about Aunt Lenore’s whereabouts. I’ll tell him how she invited me to stay but then disappeared, and ask him if he can put me in contact with Jasmine’s parents.”

  He nodded. “Good thinking. Makes sense. But I want you to get back to me before you try to contact the Morrisons, okay?”

  “Okay.”

  He looked into her eyes. “You’re really sure about this, Judith?”

  “Positive.”

  “All right then. I’ll be in touch.”

  She began studying the notebook as soon as he left. She immediately noticed that Adam was very good at this sort of thing. It seemed he’d thought of everything. He even gave her the name of another school that she had supposedly been teaching at, just in case they asked, as well as a fictitious law firm that Peter had supposedly worked for. However, everything else about her history was to remain exactly as it was. Well, that was easy enough. Actually, the more she studied the notebook, the simpler it all seemed to her. All she needed to pull this off was to put on a convincing act. And to not react to the sorts of things she might be exposed to. Adam listed derogatory words and sayings that were common to people like the Morrisons, but again he noted that she didn’t have to use these words herself. She simply needed to familiarize herself with them and appear comfortable when hearing them. She knew that would be her greatest challenge.

  In the notebook, he suggested standing before the mirror and repeating these horrible words out loud until her face appeared natural and at ease. She took the notebook into the spare room and tried to do this exercise, but she was surprised at how difficult it was. She saw her eyes flinch as she tried to pronounce words that were disgusting and insulting. Words she had never allowed her students to use. She couldn’t bear to think what those children would think or feel if they witnessed her using such foul terminology. Well, like Adam had said, she didn’t need to speak like this herself. But she needed to keep her eyes from flinching, her lips from compressing, her brows from lifting, be it ever so slightly. So over and over she practiced saying these detestable words, reminding herself that she was doing this for the sake of people like James, who’d possibly been victimized by hatred, and also for Jasmine.

  Finally, she thought she was able to say the words with a blank face, without thinking about the meaning or emotions behind them. And she felt nearly convinced that she might be able to overhear those words without reacting or revealing her true feelings. After studying the notebook carefully, she felt confident that she had digested all she could from Adam’s notes. She felt ready. She hid the notebook under her mattress for now; she planned on returning it to Adam later. Then she drove over to Jasper to shop for her costume.

  She wasn’t exactly sure what sort of clothing store she was looking for. She knew she needed something traditional and conservative, but also with the kind of color and flare that would appeal to Mrs. Morrison. She drove slowly through the business district of Jasper, glancing at shops and wondering where to stop when she saw the sign—Dusty Periwinkle’s Western Wear for Women. Perfect. She pulled into a parking place and got out. Yes! she thought triumphantly. Mr. Morrison had even worn a western shirt in Jasmine’s wedding photo. And, now that she thought about it, that awful yellow dress of Jasmine’s had been western too. Not that Judith thought that everyone who wore western clothing was racist—not by any means. In fact, she could think of a number of friends who enjoyed western wear and were the farthest thing from being racists. But at the same time, she knew this style would appeal to the Morrisons.

  Once the young sales girl recognized that Judith was a serious shopper, she gave her full attention to helping her. Judith suspected the girl worked on commission and would be rewarded for her efforts.

  “That turquoise outfit will look fantastic on you,” gushed the girl as she handed her another item. “And I’ve got the perfect earrings to go with it.”

  In no time Judith had picked out enough pieces to make a number of interesting and varied ensembles. And to her surprise, some that didn’t look half bad either. Then, with the help of the girl, she chose complementary belts, shoes, accessories, and even a white straw cowboy hat.

  “Nothing will beat this for keeping off the sun,” assured the girl. She nodded at the current outfit that Judith had on, a multicolored western shirt and an aqua denim skirt. “And that shirt looks so great tucked in like that. You’re lucky you’ve got the tiny waist for it. And look how great this belt looks.”

  Judith smiled. “Thanks for all your help. Maybe I’ll wear this outfit right out of here.”

  “Sure, I’ll cut the tags off for you.”

  Judith practiced her nonflinching techniques as the girl totaled her bill. Stoically, she reminded herself that this expense was also for Jasmine. And besides, it wasn’t as if she couldn’t afford it. It was just that she’d lived so frugally since losing Peter—almost as if she were afraid her money would soon run out. She remembered the days when both she and Peter used to say they’d do their best and then trust God to take care of them in their old age. Somehow, it had seemed easier when Peter was alive. But perhaps if she were really trusting God with her life now—embarking on this slightly crazy, not to mention dangerous, venture; well, maybe it was time to trust him with things like her savings account too. At least, she could try.

  The girl helped her load the packages into her car. “Thanks,” said Judith again. “You were a great help.”

  “Thank you.” said the girl with a bright smile. “That was the best fun I’ve had since I first started working here. Come back again any ol’ time.”

  Judith waved and drove off. So far, so good. She turned on the radio, tuning into a country station as she drove back to Cedar Crest. Suddenly she remembered the old good-natured argument she and Jasmine used to enjoy at regular intervals. It was about the only thing they could never agree on. Although the day did come when Jasmine was almost swayed.

  “Beatles!” Judith would declare with all the conviction of a twelve-year-old.

  “Elvis!” Jasmine would counter.

  “No way.” Judith would firmly shake her head. “No one is, or ever has been, greater than the Beatles. Just admit it. Even Dick Clark says so.”

  “No way,” Jasmine would stomp her foot and shout. “Elvis is, and always will be, king. Just ask my mom.”

  Well, maybe Jasmine had been right about that king business. But just the same, Judith felt certain that the Beatles still ruled!

  She smiled as she pulled into town. So many good memories from when she and Jasmine had grown up together. She’d have to take some time before meeting with the Morrisons to ensure some of the best ones were fresh in her mind. And somehow she would block out the bad ones. Thankfully, there weren’t many. She parked directly in front of the hardware store, no longer concerned about who might notice her going in or out of there. After all, this was the new Judith now. But just as she closed her car door, she noticed Eli Paxton on the other side of the street. She diverted her eyes, and yet felt certain that he saw her. Suddenly her heart began to race as she realized what she had to do. Oh, God, she prayed silently, how can I possibly do this ? How can this possibly be right? She felt torn in two as she quickly turned away.

  Ignoring Eli, she hurried into the hardware store, praying in desperation that he would not follow her in. Thankfully, Hal was waiting on someone at the counter, and she went into the back of the store where it was dark and cool and where she hoped any flush that had crept up into her cheeks might fade. She must regain her composure if she was to carry this thing off. To think that something as simple as seeing her friend Eli could so completely unnerve her was unsettling. This thing was going to be much harder than she’d expected. S
he pressed her hands against her cheeks and prayed once again. God, if you really want me to do this thing, I desperately need your help. Please, help me. Then she took a slow, deep breath and began walking toward the front of the store. She watched as the man exited. No other customers were in the store, and thankfully, Eli had not followed her inside. She pushed his image from her mind. She must not think about him now or at all.

  “Hi, Hal.” she said as she approached the counter.

  “Hey there, Judith,” replied Hal. “I didn’t see you come in.” Then he looked at her for a long moment. “You look different. What’d you do? New hairstyle or something?”

  She smiled. “I cut my hair. It’s lots cooler like this.”

  He nodded. “Well, normally I like long hair on a lady, but I think that cut looks real good on you.”

  “Thanks. Say, Hal, I came in to see if you know what’s up with Aunt Lenore.”

  “You mean Lenore Barker?”

  “Yes. I came by to visit her last week, and she invited me to stay with her. She gave me a key and everything. Then the next thing I know, she’s gone. I’m staying at her house, but—”

  “You’re staying at Lenore Barker’s house?” He scratched his head.

  “Well, yes. Like I said, she invited me. But I can’t figure out where she’s gone. Do you know how I could get in touch with Jasmine’s parents?”

  He rubbed his chin and studied her curiously. “Well, yes. I could give ’em a call for you, if you’d like.”

  “Thank you. Unless you’d rather just give me their number, and then I can call them myself.”

  He shook his head. “Nah, I couldn’t do that.”

  She nodded, acting as if there was nothing suspicious about his overly careful response. “Well, sure, then whatever you can do. I just can’t figure out why she would take off like that after inviting me to stay.”

  “Yeah, that’s odd.” He was still looking at her in a curious way.

  “So, are the Morrisons still in Mississippi?”