by Vella, Wendy
“You’re getting tired now, Cooper, so we’ll leave, but we’ll be back to see you soon, I promise.” Macy gave Cooper’s forehead a kiss. “Annabelle and I are going to sit on the front porch now, so you just holler if you need anything.”
“See ya, little man.” Cooper’s voice was a rasp as he brushed his lips over the baby’s cheek.
“I’ve never see him like that before. Well, not since he’s come home, anyway.” Annabelle fell into the seat beside Macy on her front porch.
“He’s angry, hurting and confused, Annabelle, but he’s also been behaving badly from what I hear.” Macy handed Billy to Annabelle, who turned him sideways and let him snuggle in to her. He was tired, his little body growling heavy, and his eyelashes began to flutter as she rocked him. Holding him felt so good, and she wondered what it would be like to hold her own baby, Ethan’s and hers…
Dear God, where had thought come from?
“I love our little boy, Macy. Thank you for coming here today with him, because he’s brought me some peace, if only for a few hours.” She kissed his head, inhaling the smell of baby.
Annabelle wasn’t surprised when Branna pulled up. It was just something they did for each other, always knew when they were wanted or needed.
“I brought wine.” Branna took the steps in one leap and then produced the bottle.
“I’ll get the glasses and something to remove the cork.” Macy was on her feet and heading back inside in seconds.
“You doing okay, Belle?” Branna bent to kiss Billy’s cheek softly. He was asleep now, mouth open, little pudgy hands relaxed. She then kissed Annabelle on the forehead and stroked a hand over her head.
“It’s been a hard few days, Bran, really hard,” Annabelle said, looking into her friend’s forest green eyes.
“Okay, well, that’s why I’m here, to hear all about it.” Branna took the glasses from Macy and then poured the wine after she’d opened the bottle. “But we can only have one glass.”
The first sip was like nectar, Annabelle thought. She held the next in her mouth, briefly enjoying the subtle blend of flavors before swallowing.
“Why can we only have one glass?” Annabelle said, looking down at the slumbering baby. She almost envied him because his biggest worry was where his next meal was coming from. He was loved unconditionally, fed or diapered when he cried, hugged if he fussed. It really was a dream life.
“Because I said so,” her friend said, and that was pretty much that.
“So tell me, now that we’re all settled, about these few hard days. Other than Cooper, that is,” Branna said, pulling her seat closer so they were sitting in a circle.
Could she tell them about Ethan? She wanted to, needed to understand and make sense out of the emotions she felt whenever she thought about him.
“First off, I need to tell you about Texas.” And so she did, starting from the beginning, telling them about the house Ethan had grown up in. She skimmed over the family stuff; that was Ethan’s story to tell if he chose to, not hers. Annabelle was honest and told her friends that she’d slept with Ethan.
“And you care about him, don’t you, Belle?” Macy said.
“Yes…God, yes,” she answered on a sigh. “More than I’ve cared for anyone before.”
“I think that’s called love, sweetie.”
“I know, Bran, I know.” Annabelle didn’t deny it. “But it’s all pretty hopeless, with what’s going on with Cooper and me owing Ethan all that money and then me attacking him about his brother.”
“Yeah, Jake said Ethan was pretty upset when he got back from seeing you. They talked and he left in a better mood,” Branna added.
“What does the money and Ethan’s brother have to do with anything?” Macy’s brow wrinkled.
“It’s complicated, Macy,” Annabelle said, and then she looked at the car coming up her driveway.
“Is that your dad, Bran?”
“Yup, he’s going to watch over Cooper and Billy for us while we go for a walk down to the lake and drink more wine and eat the picnic I made.”
“He can’t watch them both…can he?” Annabelle felt ridiculously excited about the prospect of a break from the house and her brother.
“Billy will sleep for another few hours now, and Cooper told me he likes Branna’s dad.” Macy stood as she spoke and lifted the sleeping baby from Annabelle and put him in his stroller. “And we’re only going to be a few minutes away, Belle. I can run back if I need to. God willing it’s not, since running’s not my thing,” she added, laughing.
“Well, now, here’s three of the most beautiful women in Howling, and all in one place,” Declan O’Donnell said as he arrived on the porch.
“When was this organized?” Annabelle looked at her friends.
“This morning,” Declan said. “Now you get whatever you need from inside and I’ll just check in with Cooper and tell him I’m here until you get back, and you ladies head out when you’re ready.”
She didn’t hesitate. There was guilt, but she stomped on it and hurried to her room. After pulling off her old sweater, Annabelle buttoned herself into a bright blue shirt and slipped into a pair of tidy jeans and flat-heeled slip-ons. She brushed her hair, added some makeup and pink lipstick, then grabbed her leather jacket and went out to join her friends.
“Wow, and there’s me without my lipstick.” Branna smiled when she saw Annabelle.
“I haven’t worn makeup, nice clothes or left this house in days. If we were going to clean your house I’d still be dressed like this.”
“You want to clean my house?” Branna asked.
“It was a throwaway comment, Bran, and just for the record, your house is clean enough already to eat off the floors.”
“Still,” her friend said. “Good to know it’s an option should I need it.”
“I have your number, Macy. If Billy wakes or needs you I’ll call, but I have his bottle so I don’t expect any problem. Plus I have Cooper to help me,” Declan O’Donnell said to Macy as he began to herd them out the door.
“I should go check on him before—” Annabelle began.
“Your brother’s asleep,” Declan added, placing a hand against Annabelle’s back as she tried to turn. “No point in waking him now.”
So she didn’t. Instead, she followed her friends out of the house. Branna pulled a basket out of her car and then they were walking down the driveway.
The lake wasn’t far and she felt her head clearing with every step she took away from the house. The weather was definitely getting colder, and she was glad of the jacket, as a breeze was coming off the water. Early afternoon had a few camper vans driving along the road, but for the most part, it was just the three women enjoying the day, happy to be together.
Macy started singing first, belting out a version of an old classic that soon had Bran and Annabelle joining her. They let go, singing as loudly as they could, and arrived at the park singing the chorus just one more time.
There was a camper van there, and just one man, seated at one of the benches. He’d heard them coming and had a smile on his face as they approached. He clapped loudly when they stopped and they all bowed. Middle-aged with a belly that was starting to hang over his belt, the man wore a Lakers cap and a wide smile.
“It saddens me to say that I’m leaving, ladies, but thank you for the memory.” He stuck out a hand. “Rex Martin.”
“Annabelle Smith.” She took it first.
“Branna O’Donnell.”
“Macy Reynolds.”
They talked briefly and he told them he was just passing through, had hiked a bit, and was now heading to Brook to meet up with friends.
The women all waved and then settled at one of the tables close to the lake. Rex Martin was soon forgotten, as Branna unpacked fried chicken, brownies and several other things that made Annabelle’s mouth water.
Wine glass in hand, she looked around her. This was heaven…well, almost.
“‘So did you see Ethan yesterda
y, Bran, when he left your house?”
Branna lowered the drumstick she’d been about to put in her mouth. “I did.”
Annabelle sighed. “He was really pissed, wasn’t he?”
“He was calmer after talking with Jake, but he was still pretty worked up.”
Annabelle closed her eyes. “I worry that Ethan will never forgive me.” She said the words quickly because they’d been rolling around inside her head needing release since Ethan had left. “I just kind of launched into him about his brother, after he said what he did to Cooper, even though what he said was right, and then things turned ugly.”
“Ugly how?” Macy asked.
Annabelle filled Macy in on some of the stuff, but she skimmed over the Brad and Ethan thing, because that was his story to tell if he chose to.
“Sounds like you were entitled to push a bit,” Macy said. “And I’ll add to that, that Ethan may have been angry but he won’t stay that way, because he loves you.”
Annabelle slowly put down her glass and pressed a fist to her chest. “Do you think so?” she whispered, feeling ridiculously happy.
“Don’t be an idiot. Of course he does, and you know it.” Branna was smiling as she said the words.
“I love him too.” Annabelle couldn’t get the smile off her face. “He came in the room when Cooper was behaving badly that morning and told him he’d be personally nursing him if he didn’t start treating me better.”
Macy sighed. “I can’t imagine a man wanting to say something like that for me.”
“They will, Macy, I promise you.” Branna put a hand over Macy’s.
“I don’t want one to,” she said, her pretty face suddenly serious. “But I can still enjoy it when the moment happens to someone I care about.”
Annabelle shot Branna a quick look, but they didn’t add anything. Both knew it would take some time before Macy trusted a man again.
“It scares me!” Annabelle said suddenly. “This feeling when he’s around. Actually, even when he’s not.” She took a large mouthful of wine while she tried to sort out what she wanted to say. “I tell myself to back away, tell myself this won’t work, he’s rich I’m poor, he’s…he’s… God, he’s just so fine,” she sighed. “It’s like he’s under my skin somehow and I have this warm feeling all over me just thinking about him. It’s so weird. I mean, you know me.” She looked at her friends. “I don’t have deep feelings, don’t let people get close. I push them away with a few cutting words and a bit of heartless flirtation… the men, that is.”
“You let us close,” Branna said.
“Yeah, but you guys were always there and we grew up together. This is different. I don’t usually let outsiders in. Plus you two know all my faults. You know about my slob of an uncle, and how he gambled our money away, and most of the bad stuff.”
“But not all,” Branna said slowly, her gaze holding Annabelle’s.
“No, not all,” Annabelle agreed, thinking back to those days when she’d wondered how she was going to keep her family together, how she would pay the bills and feed her brothers.
“So what’s bothering you about committing to Ethan? He’s hot, rich, nice, well mannered, has all his teeth and that body is seriously to die for.”
“Don’t let Jake hear you talk that way,” Macy said.
“His body is equally spectacular.” Branna waved her hand. “I’d like to point out at this stage that you’ve had men with equally spectacular bodies in your life, and have not fallen for one of them, Annabelle.”
“He’s… it’s just that he’s… there’s so much to him. He’s kind and sweet, but he can kick ass when he needs to, and he’s great in bed.”
That made her friends hoot with laughter.
“He’s just better than all of them,” Annabelle finished softly. “I fought him for so long, fought the feelings I knew were inside me, but I don’t want to anymore.”
“Then don’t,” Macy said.
“He may not forgive me.”
“He will,” Branna said. “But you need to call him, Belle, and take the first step.”
They laughed and talked until the sun started to sink in the sky, and then they packed everything up and headed back to the house. The day that had started badly had ended so much better for Annabelle. Time with her friends had cleared her head and left her feeling happier.
Arriving home, she found Declan and Cooper in the living room, which was her first surprise, as he hadn’t left his room since arriving here. The baby was once again on her brother’s lap and seemingly content. He squealed when he saw his mother.
“Everything went well?” Annabelle questioned both men.
“Excellent, and your brother beat me at cards, which did not endear him to me, but I shall take it on the chin,” Declan said, getting to his feet.
While Macy gathered up Billy and said her goodbyes to Cooper, Annabelle walked Declan out to his car.
“Annabelle, your brother is getting stronger, but I understand that his moods are still uncertain?”
She nodded.
“You must be firm with him now, and not let him walk all over you, my dear. I understand your feelings of guilt. Rational or irrational, they are yours to bear, as mine are with Branna, but I beg you to remember that when Cooper heals you will have your life back.” He gripped her shoulders, turning her to face him. “And if your heart is now full, I would ask you not to walk away from that because Cooper is making you feel as if you must.”
“It’s like being torn in two,” Annabelle whispered. “As if to heal one, I have to turn away from the other.”
“It doesn’t have to be that way. Ethan is a man of great compassion and understanding, and one who I believe is the perfect partner for you.”
“I’m not sure how you know all this.”
“If you mean how I know not to turn away from the one you love, then you need only understand how I treated my daughter to understand where my words come from.”
She heard the sorrow in his voice. Even though they had been reunited, the guilt of what had happened still sat heavy on his shoulders.
“And as for Ethan, I know because I see it in you both, even though you take pains to hide it.”
Annabelle put her arms around him and hugged him hard and he returned the gesture.
“Thank you, Declan, and I promise to think about what you’ve said.”
“Then that is all I can ask,” he said before climbing into his car to drive away.
Macy left a few minutes later, and Branna followed, taking Annabelle’s hands in hers before she got into her car.
“Call him, Belle, and tell him you love him. Don’t wait, do it now… tonight.”
“I’ll think about it.”
Branna gave her a hug, then climbed into her car and drove away, leaving Annabelle alone once more with her brother.
“You want something to eat now or a drink, Coop?” she said, walking back into the house.
“I’m good, thanks. Declan and I ate some toast and eggs that he fixed.” He was still sitting on the floor with his back against the sofa. He reached out a hand towards her. “Will you sit with me and listen to what I need to say?”
She sat beside him on the floor, stretching her legs out in front of her.
“Nice shoes,” he said.
“Thanks. I got them in Brook a while back.”
He sighed, then took her hand and wound her fingers through his. It was the first time they had touched in a long time.
“Annabelle, I’ve been thinking about what Ethan said to me today. He made me realize how hard I’ve been on you since I came home.”
“It’s okay. I know how tough this is on you.”
“It’s not okay, and I’m sorry for letting you down. Sorry for turning my back on everything that you taught me, and so sorry for stealing from you.”
“Coop—”
“Let me say these things, while my head is clear enough to do it. I’m sure my mood will darken soon and I’ll turn ba
ck into the sniveling brat I’ve been, but for now just let me speak. Okay?”
“Okay.”
“I’m sorry I treated Ethan the way I did. I know he paid my debts and I know he flew me back here, and I should never have spoken to him the way I did. He was right to say what he said to me today… more than right.”
“Why did you, Cooper?”
“Because you love him and that scared me. I was afraid I could lose you, and right now you’re the only thing anchoring me to this world.”
Annabelle leaned her head on his shoulder. “You could never lose me. I’ll always be there for you, and Ethan wouldn’t expect that to change if we end up together.”
Cooper snorted. “There is no ‘if’ about it. You love each other.”
“How do you know that when you’ve only seen him once and that was today?” Annabelle said, battling the bubbling happiness inside her.
“God, Annabelle, without even taking into consideration what he did for you, putting himself in danger to go to Vegas, it’s there in the way he looks at you, and it only took once to see that.”
“He’s a special man. When you get to know him, you’ll understand that.”
“I’m sure I will. Now I want to tell you what happened to me, if you’ll listen?”
She sat there in the quiet of their living room and listened as he told her where he’d taken a wrong turn. It had started with the gambling.
“To begin with, it was fun. I could walk away at any time. Then that all changed and I couldn’t and that was when I started borrowing and stealing from you.”
“I wish you’d told me in the beginning,” Annabelle said.
“I was ashamed, and then I didn’t care. When I got desperate I turned to the drugs to keep me awake so I could gamble, and then everything just escalated from there and before I knew it I was spiraling out of control.”
He told her about his wins and losses and the drugs he snorted or injected into his body. He left nothing out, and she never told him to stop even when her stomach felt as if it was being turned inside out.
“Okay, Ethan paid off one of my debts, but there’s another one, and it’s him that I’m worried about, because he’s not known for walking away from a debt.”